Why is it so hard to understand,
When I try to tell them I am sick,
I am sick,
I am sick to the brain,
I don’t need medicines,
I don’t need rest,
I need help.
I need someone to save me from this,
This hell,
This madness.
My loud and clear voice,
Usually goes unheard,
They don’t listen,
Rather they pretend not to listen,
I know it's all in my head,
That’s why its madness.
I am trapped,
Its dark,
It's frightening,
Its maddening.
I am lost,
I think way too much,
I cry too much,
I feel hurt,
Betrayed,
Ignored,
Invisible,
Unheard,
Dead,
Mad.
Its maddening.
I push away people,
Expect them to stay,
I behave in a strange way,
Expect them to understand,
I behave like a lunatic,
And say sorry again and again,
Expecting forgiveness,
Its maddening.
Its madness.
Many times I find myself throwing up,
Crying, and throwing up,
It's sickening,
Its maddening,
I count the stars whole night,
Thinking of infinite number of things,
And remembering none,
I think, I think, and I think,
I understand none,
I remember none,
Its maddening.
I dangle,
Between the past and present,
I dangle,
Between the present and future,
I dangle,
I keep dangling,
Its maddening,
I am insecure,
I am anxious,
I am weak,
I am mad,
Its maddening.
I speak up things,
I regret,
I keep it to myself, 
I regret for it too, 
I laugh and suddenly cry,
I cry and suddenly laugh, 
I think, I think and I think,
Its maddening.
I find myself pulling my hair, 
Off my head, 
To numb that pain,
Thump! Thump! Thump!
To stop,
That hammer inside, 
Crushing my skull,
Its maddening, 
Even to write more than this, 
Its maddening, 
To think of everything, 
Giving them words to jot down, 
Its maddening,
To write, 
Its maddening, 
To explain, 
Why is it so hard to understand,
I am sick, 
I am mad, 
Its maddening, 
Its madness.