"I will set my soul on fire
What have I become? I'm sorry"
TWENTY-ONE PILOTS - 'Ode to Sleep'

. . .

"I got a car bringing them both here right now," Detective Lance said plainly, sitting opposite them on one of the chairs. His face softened when he met Cali's eyes, a glimpse of paternal care shining through under his distaste for the Queen family. "They're mostly unharmed. Tommy has a concussion. Oliver just has a few bruises."

Cali relaxed into Thea. "Thank you, Detective," she sighed. "Do we know who did it?"

Lance frowned. "My partner has the full report. I'm not optimistic about identifying the men, but we'll try. It'll help if either of the boys can give us an account of what happened."

"Who would want to kidnap Oliver?" Thea asked quietly. "Or Tommy, for that matter? It doesn't make sense."

"Your family has a lot of enemies, Ms. Queen." Lance's voice cooled slightly. "Your brother is quite the trouble-maker. It makes sense that someone held a grudge and decided to take advantage of his lack of stability after his miraculous return."

Thea's muscles tightened, her shoulders stiffening. Cali shot him a warning look. She knew, better than most, the pain that stung Quinten Lance every time he laid eyes on Oliver Queen, or a photo of Sara. He'd lost a daughter, and it was all too easy to blame the easy victim, but that didn't give him the right to drag Oliver's name through the dirt in front of the Queen family.

They'd lost someone on that boat too.

Lance raised his hands in defeat, flicking his attention to his phone as it vibrated on the table. "They're here."

Immediately, Thea was out of her seat and hurrying to the front door, Cali and Moria not far behind. Walter stayed seated with Detective Lance, both of them readying themselves for the chaotic storm that was about to sweep into the room.

"Ollie!" Thea squealed loudly as her brother was led through the front door. That was all the warning Oliver had before he had an armful of frantic Thea, whose shaking shoulders were proof that she was trying not to cry again. "Oh my god, are you okay?"

"Speedy," he laughed, holding her just as tightly as she was holding him. "Hey, calm down. I'm fine." He spared Cali a look and moved aside so Tommy could shuffle forward. "We're both just fine."

Cali would have to speak to Oliver about his definition of 'fine' because Tommy didn't look fine.

His face was sallow and pale, eyes unfocused. His hands shook minutely - small tremors that made his fingers twitch. "Cali?" He said, reaching for her.

She immediately stepped into his embrace. "Oh Tommy," she sighed into his shoulder. "What am I going to do with you?"

His long exhale stirred some of the loose hair on her head. "Sorry for worrying you."

She drew back and cupped his cheek with her hand. He was hot to touch. "You didn't ask to be kidnapped," she said firmly. "There's no need to apologise for something like this."

"Still." Tommy reached up and grabbed the hand that was touching his face. He gave her an earnest look, some of the concussion-related glaze fading from his eyes. "I'm sorry for worrying you."

She allowed herself to smile. Tommy mirrored the action, but it was ruined as he winced in pain. Right. Concussion. "Come on," Cali said, tugging on his hand. "I'll get Raisa to get you a cool cloth. You're flushed. Detective Lance will ask you a few questions and then you can get some rest." She looked over at Oliver and Thea, both of whom were looking back at her already. "Both of you can get some rest," she said firmly.

Oliver just pulled a face that very clearly said that he would not be resting. Cali resisted the urge to throw her hands up. Barely.

Slowly, the party moved into the living room, the second detective moving over to confer with Lance. Cali let her attention drift over to their murmured conversation, taking note of the sketch that was passed between them. Hm.

Detective Lance cleared his throat once everyone was settled. "Alright," he started, frowning down at the papers in his hands. "Mr Queen, could I ask you to please recount your experience, with an explanation as to why I have a sketch of some strange hooded figure in my hands?"

Slowly, but clearly, Oliver told his story, each sentence more unbelievable than the last. How ridiculous - some masked vigilante swooped in to save them? Starling City didn't even have a Vigilante!

Obviously, Lance shared Cali's disbelief. "So that's your story?" He asked incredulously. "A guy in a green hood flew in and single-handedly took out 3 armed kidnappers. I mean, who is he? Why would he do that?"

Oliver pursed his lips. "I don't know. Find him and you can ask."

Lance scoffed. "Yeah. What about you?" He turned his attention to Tommy, who blinked at the sketch that was suddenly in front of him. "You see the hood guy?"

A glimmer of sharp cunning and suspicion flickered over Tommy's face, and Cali's tight grip on his hand loosened in surprise. "I saw..." Tommy very subtly glanced at Oliver, "...Just movement. Everything was blurry. I was kind of out of it."

A lie. Tommy was lying. He knew something. Or at least suspected something. Cali drew her hand back and pressed it against her stomach. Tommy didn't acknowledge the movement, but his hand twitched as if he wanted to reach out to her.

"Yeah," Lance focused back on Oliver, lips twisted. "It's funny, isn't it? One day back, and already somebody's gunning for you. Aren't you popular?"

Cali made a small noise of protest in the back of her throat. Olvier didn't deserve to be grilled as if he were anything other than an innocent victim. "What happened to innocent until proven guilty?"

Lance's attention remained on Oliver's impassive face. "I know that Oliver here is guilty of a lot of things. It's which ones I can charge him with in a Court of Law that interest me."

"Were you able to identify the men?" Moira's voice was icy.

Lance's partner cleared his throat, shuffling his feet slightly to draw the attention off Lance. "Scrubbed identities, untraceable weapons," he explained. "These were pros."

"Yeah," Lance added. "Well, they probably figured you'd pay a king's ransom to get your boy back - or a Queen's ransom, as it were." His tone shifted, sharpening until it could cut to the core. "After all, a parent would do anything to keep their child safe."

Moira laid a hand on Oliver's wrist protectively. "I don't find your tone appropriate, Detective."

Walter, sensing the unspoken accusations and silent tension, spoke up. He pasted on a practiced, polite smile. "If Oliver can think of anything else, he'll be in touch. Thank you, gentlemen, for coming."

Lance chuckled bitterly, eyeing Oliver with a predatory look. "Your luck never seems to run out, does it?"

Oliver said nothing as the two detectives left.

Moira shook her head in disapproval, gripping onto Oliver's hands. "Don't listen to him, Oliver," she said, her face impossibly soft and open. "What happened to Sara wasn't your fault. Quinten Lance is just a man grieving for his child. It doesn't give him the right to accuse you like that, but it is understandable."

"Mom," Oliver whispered, looking at her sadly. "Don't."

"Don't what?"

Oliver looked away, lips pressed together as he didn't answer. He turned to face Tommy and Cali, giving them both a tight, miserable smile. Cali smiled back at him sadly, but Tommy just steadily ignored him.

Cali pursed her lips, trying to keep a hold of her growing temper. Moments ago, she'd been sick with worry, and now here Tommy was, keeping secrets. Here Oliver was, lying through his teeth with a perfect smile. And everyone believed him. Everyone believed Tommy.

"Excuse me," she said briskly, standing up. Tommy very carefully did not look at her. "I think I need some air."

"What?" Thea blinked up at her, voice colored with indignant confusion. "Cali, they just go back after being kidnapped and you're leaving?"

"I said I need some air, Thea," Cali said, eyes narrowing in warning. She loved Thea as though the Queen girl was her sister, but she would not hesitate to wrap a shield of bitterness and scathing anger around herself just to keep Thea away. It had happened before, with Michael. Cali wasn't afraid to let it happen again.

Surprisingly, it was Oliver who spoke up. His sharp eyes followed Cali as she gathered herself. "Let her go, Speedy. She won't go far."

"What are you, my keeper?" Cali scoffed, shaking her head. Any sort of mournful sympathy she'd harboured for him during Lance's questioning evaporated instantly, drying up under the heat of her anger. Oliver was a grown man. He didn't need her coddling him. "I'll be back in an hour."

"That's a long time to 'get some air'," Tommy said quietly. He still refused to look at her.

Cali didn't say anything as she spun on her heel and stormed out the same door Detective Lance had left through. The boys could keep their secrets. It was bound to happen sooner or later. Oliver had come back to them with an edge to his voice and a wall in his eyes, and Cali wasn't about to turn herself into a wrecking ball to break through. That wasn't her place. Oliver was his own person - he was entitled to his secrets.

Tommy though...After Michael, Cali had been so sure that they were done keeping secrets between them. Unless it was something like a surprise celebration, they told each other everything. That's just how it had been for the five years Oliver had been gone.

Now Oliver was back, and Tommy was hiding things.

Obviously some things never changed.

"Parker, I need you to drive me back to my apartment," she said kindly to her driver, who was waiting by the door with one of her jackets. Raisa stood beside him, lips twisted in a sad smile. Cali nodded at her, allowing Parker to place the jacket over her shoulders. "I have a party to get ready for."

"Of course, Ms. Cali." Parker held his arm out, and Cali gladly latched onto it and let him lead her out to the front doors and down to the car. Of course, everyone but Tommy and Thea disapproved of such familiarity between Cali and her driver, but they didn't understand that Parker had been there for her through everything.

Parker hadn't asked questions when she requested that he drive her around the city every night until she fell asleep in the background. In her opinion, he wasn't paid enough.

Gently, he got her settled in the backseat of the car. Cali laid her head back against the headrest and let out a long, tired sigh. She was so sick of everything. She was exhausted and her muscles ached. Today had already been too long and there was still so much left to do before she could go to sleep.

"I was so relieved when he came back," she said to the window once Parker started driving. He hummed in response. "I mean, it was a miracle. Oliver Queen - not dead. I got to see him, and hold him, and know that he was back with us. But...But he's not. He's not with us, and that's almost worse, and I'm so tired of things getting worse."

Parker turned a corner. "I have faith that you can handle it, Ms. Cali."

For a heartbeat, Cali just let the whole situation lie. She let Oliver and Tommy and Thea roll off her shoulders, and she took a deep breath. "I don't want to," she admitted in a whisper, and just like that, phantom hands encircled her wrists and started to drag her right back down again. "I don't want to handle it. I just want to wake up and go to work and come home and sleep. I want a normal life. I want to forget about Oliver Queen and Michael Martin and-and-"

She broke off, biting her bottom lip hard enough that the skin split and blood started to tint her mouth. God, the ever-tightening spiral of panic was getting too tight again. She was tipping backwards, teetering on the edge of the cliff that she'd just climbed up. If she fell, she would end up that broken girl who couldn't get out of bed in the mornings.

Cali didn't want to be that girl again.

Parker said nothing more, and Cali let those invisible hands grip her tight and drag her back under the water. She was too tired to fight them.

The rest of the car trip was silent.

. . .

"Dad still hasn't visited?" Tommy sighed at the lack of an answer, jamming his hands in his pockets. "Listen, Detective Lance says that Michael is going to be put away for a long time. You won't have to see him ever again. Laurel's offered to represent you in court."

Cali blinked sluggishly, keeping her gaze locked on the world beyond the hospital room window. "I don't care," she whispered.

"I can call Dad again if you want-"

"I don't care."

Tommy sighed again, dropping his chin to his chest. After a second or two, he looked back up. Cali never twitched. "I know it's hard." His voice trembled. He swallowed and counted to five in his head before trying to speak again. "I know that...that Thea got hurt, but that wasn't your fault. Michael, he...he's not a good person. You have no control over that-"

"Please leave." Cali's hands gripped at the blanket tight enough that Tommy could see veins starting to bulge.

"Sis-"

"Leave."

"Cali, c'mon-"

"Get out!" The last word was bellowed, and Tommy could only bow his head in defeat as Cali threw her head back into the soft pillows. The heart monitor had sped up enough that a nurse was speed-walking toward the room. Tommy breathed out his goodbyes before fleeing.

He called his father. He got no response.

. . .

"We've arrived, Ms. Cali." Parker's voice was professional, but soft, and Cali blinked open her eyes to stare at the familiar front of her apartment block. "Do you require me to stay?"

"If you wouldn't mind Parker," Cali answered lightly, offering him a small smile. "It shouldn't take me very long to get ready, and then we can return to the Queen's mansion. You're free after that."

Parker dipped his head, and Cali climbed out of the car, inhaling deeply through her nose. Starling City was a bit of a grotty city, so overall it didn't have a great smell, but her apartment was right next to a bakery, and the air always seemed to smell like vanilla.

The familiar scent steadied her, forced the dizzy sense of exhaustion to recede, if only a little bit. It was the smell of home and safety, the smell she associated with laughter and afternoons with Tommy and bright sunshine.

Her apartment was on the second floor, and she was grateful for it today. A headache had bloomed during the drive over, and she really just wanted a shower and some painkillers. In fact, if it wasn't for Oliver, she wouldn't be going to the party at all. It was purely the knowledge that she was celebrating her best friend that spurred her to keep going. Oliver always did have that power over her.

She reached her front door after a short ride in the elevator, digging her keys out of the pocket of her jacket. God, she was going to drink an entire container of painkillers just to get rid of this damn headache-

Her door was already unlocked.

Cali's hand froze on the doorknob, her keys clinking against the wood harmlessly as the door started to ease open. It couldn't have been an accident - she always triple-checked that she'd locked it properly. She'd definitely locked it when she'd left for lunch with Tommy. She hadn't been home since then, because she'd crashed at Tommy's place while getting ready for the dinner and then she'd stayed the night at the mansion and then she'd gone shopping and-

Someone was in her apartment.

Quietly, she slipped inside, closing the door behind her silently. The benefit of being friends with Detective Quinten Lance was that she'd participated in far too many self-defensive and boxing lessons. Calissa Merlyn was far from helpless. Whoever had decided to break into her apartment was about to learn that lesson the hard way.

"Put your fists away, daughter. I'm not a threat."

Well shit.

Cali sighed, letting some of the tension dissipate from her body. She didn't relax completely though - Malcolm Merlyn may not be a physical threat, but he was dangerous nonetheless. She could never be too careful around him.

"Malcolm," she said tiredly, feeling the earlier elation brought on by the smell of the bakery splutter out. "What are you doing here?"

Malcolm turned away from the window, quirking an eyebrow. "It's nice to see you too," he said casually. "Thank you for your warm welcome."

Cali gave him a droll look. "Sorry," she said dryly. "Let me try again." Immediately, she pulled her lips into an over-exaggerated smile and put on the most ridiculously high-pitched voice she could. "Hi Dad! I'm so glad you came over without asking and broke into my apartment! I really love it when you drop by and completely ruin my day!" She dropped the act and crossed her arms. "That better?"

Malcolm just let out a breath and shook his head. "I don't know what I expected."

"Sure. What do you want?" Cali started shrugging off her jacket, setting her keys in the dish on the table by the door.

Malcom just watched for a moment, his gaze heavy on her back. She could feel him watching her, his eyes burning holes in her shoulders as she took her time doing things she really didn't have to do. It wasn't until she'd exhausted the trinkets by her door and she turned around to face her father that Malcolm began to speak.

"I wanted to check on you," he said calmly, fondness and concern clouding his dark eyes. Cali bit back a snort. "I heard Oliver was back - I just wanted to make sure you were handling the whole thing okay. God knows your brother must be over-the-moon."

Cali plastered on a tight smile. "Tommy is adjusting," she said, her voice steely. "I'm adjusting as well. Having Oliver just magically arise from the dead isn't easy on anyone at the moment."

"Of course, of course, I didn't mean to imply anything." Malcolm's entire expression sharpened. "I trust that Oliver's...adjusting well?"

Right. Of course. Malcolm Merlyn never came to visit his children unless he wanted something. Cali knew that. She didn't know why she was so disappointed in him now. "Oliver is fine." She met her father's inquisitive gaze head-on and lifted her chin. "That's all you're getting from me. I'm not going to help you torment an innocent family."

"Torment?" Malcolm repeated with a laugh. "God, Calissa, is that what you think of me? I don't want to hurt the Queen family. Moira is my friend. You, Tommy, Oliver and Thea are practically siblings. Why would I try and hurt them?"

"I don't know, why would you want to hurt them?"

Malcolm's jaw clenched at her tone, and he took a deep breath. He'd never appreciated her challenging him, but Cali wasn't a scared little girl anymore. Malcolm may be her father, but he had no power over her anymore. "Fine," Malcolm surrendered. "Fine. I was trying to care about my own daughter, but I see now that she doesn't want anyone to care about her-"

Cali bit out a sharp, barking laugh. "Really?" She said incredulously. "You're trying to spin this so that you're the victim?"

"I'm not spinning anything!" Any sense of gentle calm had completely left Malcolm, and he drew his shoulders back as his face dropped into a cold sort of anger. "You know, Tommy chewed me out after you were in hospital. He said that I should care about my children, not abandon them. If this is what I get for trying to be a good father, I refuse to feel guilty for it."

Jesus Christ, Cali could not deal with this that today. "Get out," she said icily, raising a hand to rub at her temple. Her headache was reaching migraine levels now. Her stomach roiled.

Malcolm stared at her for a moment. "Your mother would be disappointed in you," he said, as if that sentence would win this battle.

Cali dropped her hand to glare at him. "Are you sure I'm the one she'd be disappointed in?" She snapped. "Because I'm pretty sure I'm looking at the disappointment in this family, and I'm not looking in a mirror."

Evidently, it was the wrong thing to say. Malcolm stiffened, his face shuttering. When he spoke, his voice was dark and guttural. "How dare you speak to me that way," he hissed.

"How dare I?" Cali hissed back. "How dare you! If you want to throw Mum in my face, then you better prepare for me to throw her right back at you."

Malcolm took a step forward, fists clenched by his sides. Cali took a step back. Malcolm took another step forward. Cali continued to back away. It wasn't until her back hit the wall that she realised she had absolutely nowhere to go. Malcolm towered over her, eyes dark and dangerous. She wasn't short, not by a long shot, but something about her father had always made her feel small.

She pressed further into the wall as Malcolm put a hand beside her head and leaned right down to whisper in her ear. He didn't raise his voice above a soft whisper - it was a deceptively gentle and soothing tone of voice. "If you dare to speak to me like that again," he purred, "or if you use Rebecca against me in a futile attempt to hurt me, I will take away everything that you love. I will force you to return to me - you will live with me, and work for me, and you won't ever disobey me again. You are my daughter, you will listen to me."

Cali took a shaking breath, desperately trying to blink back the fearful tears that were bubbling up in her eyes. She wouldn't cry in front of Malcolm. He didn't deserve to have that kind of effect on her. "Go to hell," she breathed as Malcolm drew back.

He grinned wolfishly at her. "I'll meet you there, shall I?"

"Get out."

He stepped away from her, fixing his suit jacket. The small, victorious smirk never left his face. He took his time in getting to her front door, and he hesitated with his hand resting on the doorknob. "Oh," he said innocently, as though he hadn't just threatened her. "Enjoy the promotion at the library. It wasn't easy to convince them to fire the old Head, but I'm pretty sure the significant sum I offered them did the trick. Have a good night."

When he finally closed the door behind him, Cali sank down until she was sitting on the floor and took long, deep breaths until she didn't feel like she was about to throw up. She pulled out her phone to call Parker.

She still had that damn party to go to.