HANAHAKI
BYOU

WORD COUNT 1.8k
OVERVIEW "hanahaki disease is a fictional disease in which the victim coughs up flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love"

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KIM SEOKJIN BLAMED himself entirely for the pain he was in. this chest stabbing, lung aching pain that he felt next to his heart, he knew it was his fault. he had heard the tales from his mother and his many female relatives, but he never thought it would happen to him. a boy, suffering from hanahaki disease? preposterous.

it had been seokjin's aunt who had first told him of the malady of which many people - the majority of which were female - had suffered from, as she had lost her dearest friend to the disease. the hanahaki malady was as old as time itself, she had told him; a disease that occurs when a person suffers from one-sided love, and flowers begin to bloom in the victim's lungs. you'll know you have the disease when you begin to cough up flower petals after feeling indescribable aches in your chest.

and there seokjin was, recalling the words said to him six years ago, as he lay on the floor of the office building's bathroom, holding in his hands five pearly white rose petals, spotted with droplets of crimson blood. his blood.

"oh no." seokjin's voice was barely a whisper, his eyes brimming with salty tears as he looked at the petals, heart beating fast in the cage of his chest. the first flowers had begun to bloom, almost like they had been waiting for spring. seokjin's rose garden at home had just produced their first buds, and so had his disease, blooming petals as white as the clouds that floated across the sky that seokjin could see from the small widow in the washroom.

he inhaled deeply, controlling his tears, hearing footsteps on the tiles outside. he stood up from the ground, throwing the white petals into the toilet and wiping his lips of blood, flushing the petals away. he had painkillers in his pockets - his chest had been paining him for so long, he needed them - and he chucked two down his throat, dry swallowing and taking a deep breath. there was people talking outside of the cubicle where he had locked himself, and walked out, coming face to face with the boy who was partly responsible for the petals he had just coughed up.

min yoongi was with his best friend, byun baekyun, the two of them laughing about something seokjin hadn't heard. seokjin just brushed past them, ignoring the stabbing pain in his chest as he ducked out of the bathroom. his work day wasn't over yet, so he returned to his cubicle, seating himself beside hoseok and returning to what he had been doing before he had rushed to the bathroom.

"you okay, hyung?" hoseok asked, sounding genuinely concerned. "you rushed outta here like you were in a lot of pain."

seokjin bit hard at his lip, typing up the information he was supposed to be working on. hoseok looked at his hyung with a caring expression, noticing a red stain on seokjin's usually pristine button up.

"hyung?" he asked tentatively, biting at his lip. seokjin turned his head with a polite 'hm?', wondering why hoseok was acting like this. the younger boy pointed at the blood stain, and seokjin's eyes widened.

"um," seokjin started nervously. "well..."

was he really going to tell his coworker that he had a potentially life-threatening disease? he and hoseok weren't too close; all they really spoke about was the cute people on their floor - hoseok really liked kim taehyung, while seokjin was crushing on the equally straight (and taken) min yoongi - and they'd had some drinks outside of work, and even if seokjin didn't know him that well, he was the only friend he had at work. but still. seokjin would only tell hoseok after he told his closest friend.

"it's nothing, i'm sure," seokjin put on a smile. "stomach bug. i'm... i'm gonna leave, i reckon it could get worse. cover for me, please?"

hoseok nodded, heart shaped smile growing on his face. "you take care of yourself, hyung. i'll see you tomorrow?"

"mmhm. bye hobi." seokjin waved goodbye, walking to the elevator and grabbing his coat from the hanger, before pressing the button, feeling slightly sick. the pain was constant, until the pain killers kicked in; it was like someone had punched him in the chest with all their force, that pain multiplied by a hundred, and it was all seokjin could do not to cry as he stepped into the elevator, pressing the ground floor button. as the door was closing and seokjin was ready to go home and phone namjoon and tell him what was wrong-

then someone stuck their foot in the door, and stopped that happening.

seokjin's head jerked up at the intrusion, and he saw the cause for his pain step in, clad in a grey three piece. min yoongi. perfect appearance, from his dark black hair to his polished italian armani loafers; he wore clothes that made him look perfect, turtlenecks and suits and black leather rolex watches. seokjin could almost drool over his rich gucci ties and silver rings, or the way he always slurred his words slightly as he spoke, or even just the way he walked, confidence oozing from his very pores.

there was just one, very large problem with min yoongi (in seokjin's eyes at least); he was straight, and in a relationship with a vapid bitch of a woman, named soohee or something similar. so all seokjin's love for this man, who was so above him in every aspect, was unrequited, and that unrequited love was blooming into painful flowers and roots in his chest.

"hey, seokjin, right?"

the slurred, scratchy voice of min yoongi caught seokjin's attention, and the blonde man turned his head in his direction. he forced a smile, thanking god the pain was diminishing.

"hi. that's me," seokjin responded bluntly, not sure what yoongi wanted. "you work in cubicle eight, huh? min... yoongi?" seokjin was faking not knowing anything about yoongi, just so maybe he could stop liking the man. yoongi nodded. it was odd how the two were so close in age, and yet yoongi was a decent size smaller than seokjin. it was endearing.

"you're six, with that jung guy?" yoongi asked, and seokjin nodded. "weird, how we've barely spoken, and we've both worked here for around the same time."

we may have barely spoken, but yet my body decided to bloom these fucking flowers of pain in my lungs, seokjin thought. goddamn it, min yoongi. what are you doing to me?

"i'll see you around, seokjin." yoongi smiled as he stepped out. seokjin smiled in response, before another pang of pain hit him, hard, almost winding him.

time to go home, and call namjoon.

"i fucked the hell up, joonie."

namjoon raised his eyebrows, crossing his legs and leaning forward to listen to seokjin a bit better. the older man was laying face down on his couch, in his work trousers and an oversized hoodie, and namjoon was a bit concerned, to say the least. seokjin's face was smushed into the cushions, so his speech came out a bit muffled, but namjoon heard his shocking words loud and clear.

"i have the hanahaki disease."

namjoon gasped loudly - perhaps over-exaggerated - and held a hand to his mouth, eyes wide. "oh, oh seokjin," he bit at his lip, hard, watching as his friend turned over, facing him and clutching his knees to his chest. "do you- do you think you'll die?"

"don't hate me, joon, but i am 103% positive that i will die," seokjin deadpanned, not joking at all. namjoon glared at him. "i'm unrequited-ly in love with min yoongi, my heterosexual colleague who is dating a vapid bitch-"

"-i think they're engaged, actually." namjoon cut in. seokjin let out a pained guttural groan, clutching at his chest with a heavy sigh.

"i'm dying, joonie," he sighed, eyes welling up with tears. "fuck- could you get me some painkillers? bathroom cupboard, purple packet."

namjoon nodded and ran off to the bathroom. seokjin gulped heavily; he made namjoon leave the room because he didn't want the younger boy to see him cry. everything hurt so much, emotionally and physically, he just couldn't take it anymore. he knew the disease would end up killing him, he was certain, because yoongi was engaged, and straight, and he would never return his emotions. seokjin didn't know what to do; he didn't want to die, he didn't want to leave namjoon or his mum or any of them. he was only twenty six, he had so much more to live for.

but it was all going to go, thanks to one man, and seokjin's blasted emotions.

seokjin broke down in sobs, gagging and retching as he cried, more and more flower petals coming from his bloodstained lips. he was vaguely aware of namjoon saying his name, of arms around him, of white petals in his hands, but everything was blurry and hazy, the pain overtaking everything as he cried into namjoon's arms, blood staining the younger boy's shirt as he let seokjin release everything onto him.

"it's gonna be okay, seokjin. we can- we can sort this out. there has to be a way!" namjoon was sobbing too, big fat tears that poured down his cheeks. "i don't want you to die, hyung!"

all seokjin could do was choke on his blood, his tears, his flower petals, because he didn't want to die either, he didn't want to just go like that, but there was no solution, no other solution but death. everyone knew that if your affections weren't returned, you'd die.

seokjin supposed he had to accept his fate. he wouldn't ruin yoongi's life by telling him he was dying because of him. he did have to tell him, though.

"j-joon," he coughed out, holding tight to the younger boy. "g-get me a p-pen an-and paper."

namjoon didn't question it, and went to grab what seokjin needed. seokjin held the paper in his bloodstained fingers, tears clouding in his eyes as he began to write.

dear min yoongi,

you don't know me all too well. we met in the elevator once, despite working on the same floor at the same firm for three years, and you may think that i don't know nor care about you.

that's bullshit.

min yoongi, i regret to tell you this, but i'm in love with you. by all logic, i know i shouldn't be. you're straight, and engaged to a beautiful woman. you seem happy. i don't want to ruin that.

i'm certain you know what the hanahaki disease is. when a person suffers from one-sided love, flowers begin to bloom in their lungs, thus causing death unless their affections are returned. well, that is my malady; i fell for you, and so my respiratory system has begun to fill with white roses.

i wrote this note to say goodbye. goodbye to a man i never really met. please, don't feel guilty or responsible for my death. my own foolish emotions bought me to this end.

i have approximately two months to live, my dear yoongi. and i will make those two months the happiest i have ever lived. and when the flowers take over my lungs and suffocate me, my best friend will give you this note, because i want you to know that i love you. i have since i laid eyes on you.

i love you

- kim seokjin

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(l020418

idk i'm crying in the club rn yall i hate seokjin in pain :(

love u

- jace