Levi

I sit at my desk sorting through the new recruits' files. Only twenty boys and girls signed up. They're supposed to bring me the drafted men's papers but nobody has showed up yet.

My door opens and I'm faced with a very pissed off Eren. I'm just as angry so all I can do is glare back at him.

"What kid?" I snap allowing him to talk.

"I'M SO SICK OF THESE NEW RECRUITS THEY'RE ALL COCKY SONS OF BITCHES AND PRINCESS WON'T QUIT FLIRTING WITH THEM!" Eren shouts angrily. I can't help but giggle slightly at the kid.

"Which one this time Jaeger?" I ask while still gazing into his green eyes.

"Not one, ones, the twins." Ah my twin duo. I flip through files till I find their's.

Kaoru Hitachiin

Age: 18
Gender: Male
Parabatai: N/a
Height: 6'
Weapon of choice: Bow
Suggestions: N/a

Hikaru Hitachiin
Age: 18
Gender: Male
Parabatai: N/a
Height: 6'
Weapon of choice: Seraph Blade
Suggestions: Keep Kaoru by my side. That's not a suggestion, that's an order.

Why they aren't parabatai I don't know. I do know they've got Princess wrapped around their finger.

"They keep tag teaming me. It's not fair! They've never even killed a greater demon before!" Eren pouts.

"Come here." I say harshly. Eren's eyes fly open.

"H-Heichou I don't-"

"I said come here." Eren pulls a chair up and sits beside me. His eyes shine with admiration as he looks at me.

"James is a valuable member of our military, he heals while we fight, and his life means more than any of ours." I pause and watch that admiration leave his eyes.

"There's a squad we put together, of our best fighting soldiers. You were the first one, apart from myself, that was picked to be on the squad." Eren's eyes swell with tears.

"I don't want you to listen to what anyone says. They don't know what you've lived through. You may be a brat, but you're my brat okay?" Before anything else can be said Eren throws his arms around me.

I can hear his muffled sobs while he holds me like I'm his lifeline. Hesitantly I hug him back.

"Never forget that." I finish.

Nobody apart from Erwin has ever showed me this kind of affection. Eren.....needs.....me. I can feel my heart about to burst from within my chest.

"Thank you Heichou! Thank you!" Eren cries before holding my shoulders a bit tighter. "Thank you."

He pulls away and smiles the sweetest smile before saying,

"I'll come visit you more often Heichou! That's a promise!" I just giggle as he walks off.

"Whatever you say brat!" I shout back at him as he walks away.

I let myself relish in the peace and quiet. Moments like this are few and far between in my life.

John

I stare at myself in the mirror with un-surfaced tears in my eyes. I'm in my military uniform, the one thing I used to feel manly in but now it's just lost its touch.

Marco's badge is sewn carefully into the inside of my jacket. It helps but it isn't enough. I still remember our first, and last, kiss like it was yesterday.

Flashback

"John what is the purpose of this?" Marco asks gently. "Why are we here?"

"Its obvious you like women not men so this is pointless." A single tear rolls down Marco's cheek.

"No." I snap harshly.

"W-what?" Marco's blue eyes are wide.

"I don't like men or women," I pause and slip my fingers under Marco's chin gently.

"I like you Marco, no I don't like you, I love you Marco." I whisper before leaning in and placing my lips on Marco's gently.

He instantly kisses back, wrapping his hands around my neck. Our moment of happiness was cut short, by the sound of a chainsaw firing.

"I love you too John. More than anything."

End of flashback

Why did I let him run?! Why didn't I stop him and say no this is our night!

Sobs erupt from my throat. Out of all the people who could've died why did it have to be my Marco?!

"John are you ready to go?" Kaoru asks softly.

I wipe my tears before nodding. They're going to let me say my goodbyes before burning him. I've always agreed with Marco's parents about most things, but this I can't.

Time Skip

I walk into the room where Marco's body is being kept. Tears leak from my eyes as I stare at the corpse of my best friend.

"Marco you idiot." I whisper before waking over and taking his icy cold hand in mine.

"I was going to get my marks stripped for you."

Marco

"John." I say as I watch him from afar. He says nothing just stares down at a person who looks a lot like me.

"I LOVED YOU GODDAMN IT!" John starts to violently sob.

"YOU LEFT ME! YOU LEFT ME SO THAT BRAT COULD LIVE!"

"John!" I shout and take a step closer to him.

"HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME MARCO?!" John sobs while clutching the other's hand.

"John can't you hear me!" I cry out.

John raises the hand to his lips and kisses it gently.

"I'll never love another." He whispers before releasing the hand. I watch helplessly as he walks towards the door.

"I'm not ready yet!" I start running towards John. "I still want to talk with you!" I cry.

Just as John reaches the door I reach out and touch his shoulder.

"Wait please!" I cry and this time I get a response.

John

I feel a cold presence on my shoulder and my instincts cause me to turn back and look. My eyes widen slightly as I watch the silent brother's carrying Marco away.

"What is it John?"

I whip back around and take a deep breath. Tears begin to run down my face.

Wait please!

The cry echoes through my mind. It was Marco's voice.

"It's nothing." I choke out. "I must be hearing things."

I walk back outside and join Marco's mother and father. His dad places his hand firmly on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry son. I know how much this hurts." He says sternly.

"I'm alright sir. Marco would've wanted me to be." I draw to a salute as Marco's ashes get brought out. He always looked so much better doing this pose.

I watch silently as Marco's mom goes up and holds her son's ashes in her fingers, then Marco's Father mimicking the action.

The ashes get brought around to me and I take a deep breath before winding them in my right hand. I'm holding all that's left of Marco right now. All but that miserable ache I feel in my heart.

I release the ashes back into the pile and turn away as they get added to a random building. Marco deserved so much better than being a damn building.

Marco

"Oh John." I whisper with tears in my eyes.

"Please, please make a friend. Don't push everyone away." I pause and wipe my tears.

"You've gotta let go soon Marco. It's time. You're life as a shadowhunter is over." The voice of death says.

"Please John for me." I whisper before kissing the back of my right hand.

I know John felt it too.

Death takes me gently in his arms and carries me away. Leaving what's left of me sewn into the inside of my parabatai's military jacket.