Niko did not react well to the news.

"She can't get you if you never leave the boat."

"What? No offense, but I don't want to end up like Tsarina!"

"It's the only way to totally ensure your safety."

Mallo shook his head. "No, no.

Can't you just give me a charm to ward off demons?"

"Yeah, I can do that, but it's not infallible."

"Sounds good for me!"

Niko had an interview, a rather important one, from an author seeking to make a book about some of the rising artists in the area. It was too much of an opportunity to miss.

Niko loved interviews, especially when they were with people who expected him to be your standard artist, no shenanigans, all business.

In preparation, he looked through his closest. He could crossdress, lie to them outright about his gender identity, but someone had already done that. And he didn't want to plagiarize.

He remembered that he had a "t" rune shirt, famously representing the Norse god of War and Justice, Tyr. Truthfully, he had more in common with Odin or Loki, but there was a growing trend of people being wary of people with an interest in Norse Mythology. He figured that it might make a strong first impression.

Mallomor took interest.

"Why are you changing?"

"Interview. Gonna mess with them."

"An interview!! That's great, but you seem to dress so casually. And not very professional." Mallomor brushed Niko's hair back. Niko scruffed it up again.

"It's an interview for a book, not a job interview. And I'm an artist, nobody is expecting me to look anymore than presentable."

"I do. And it frustrates me that you don't make much of an effort with your appearance."

"Have you considered that it's hard for me to do this sort of shit?" It wasn't meant to be so harsh.

"Don't yell at me!"

"I was yelling?"

Mallomor moved closer to him.

"Are you OK?"

"I'm fine...why wouldn't I be?"

Mallomor reached out to him, but Niko dogged it, running out the door. It was all instinct, not much thinking involved.

Mallomor went to follow, but he lost Niko's trail.

It was no longer August, September had its share of chills. Mallomor flew to get a bird's eye view of the coastal town, but there was still no sign of Niko. He landed on a random roof, and saw a dark blue-grey cat.

"Tsarina?" That got the cat's attention, looking right into his glowing red eyes. "I'm glad to see you! Have you see Niko anywhere?"

The cat's hair stood on end. "Who are you? What are you talking about?"

"So you're not Tsarina?"

The cat bolted, closely followed by Mallo. He phased through a wall, interrupting a witch's ritual.

She was a teenager, rich brown skin and coily hair. She dressed like a rich private school student, white button up shirt, navy blazer, grey plaid skirt, knee-high socks, and loafers.

She raised her crystal tipped wand in his direction.

"Don't move."

Mallomor put his hands up. "Am I being arrested?"

She was put off by the innocence of the statement. "I'm not a cop, so no...

But stay here. I have some questions for you. Like, how did you get here."

Niko's interview was going as planned.

"If I could renovate my houseboat into a longboat, I would. Even just a dragon prow would be cool!"

The interviewer, a lighter-skinned black woman with her hair firmly tied back, nodded, exhausted with Niko's shenanigans.

"Can we move to your personal life?"

"I already told you about the cat and the houseboat."

"I meant personal experiences."

Niko slouched in his seat. "What do you want to know?"

The interviewer adjusted her glasses. "Well, nobody has been able to pin down your sexuality. Would you like to do so now?"

Niko looked around the meeting room.

"How about...never?"

The interviewer was stunned silent.

Niko continued. "Is never good enough for you?"

"Diversity is important. Imagine the hets, gays, bis, and aces you could inspire!"

"Not everyone wants their sexuality to be known by the public. Can't I just be good representation for those kinds of people?

I'm more than my identity checkmarks, anyway."

"There's just a lot of people that are curious-"

Niko banged his fist on the table. "It's not any of their business!"

"Calm down, Niko!"

Niko looked at the door. "What other questions are you gonna ask me?"

"CHildhood, family life, whether or not you're neurodivergent."

Niko walked out the door and went straight to his houseboat.

"Mallo? Mallomor?

Where'd that ditzy shedim go?"