*This is not my story but from @ themarmalade on AO3*

-*-

Yoongi wakes at noon, miserably sweaty. Memories of last night breeze around him, sweeping any other cares away. He rolls over to look at Hoseok.

The bed is empty. He panics and hates himself a little. You are not this needy, he tells himself, smoothing his palm down the cream sheets.

It doesn't stop him from worrying if Hoseok already left the bed because he regrets last night and doesn't want to encourage Yoongi. He sprawls across the bed and tells himself to shut up. It's noon, that's why he's out of bed for god's sake.

Still, staring at the ceiling fan go uselessly round and round, he immediately replays last night and hunts for any signs that Hoseok didn't like it, that it was Yoongi wanting it more than him.

He reminds himself that Hoseok was the one that pulled a confession out of Yoongi, Hoseok was the one who literally carried Yoongi to his bed.

But what if Hoseok thinks it's a mistake now, in the light of day? What if it was a mistake? Too much too soon for their bizarre, delicate situation.

God though, the way Hoseok kissed me. The way his tongue tasted. The lazy, predatory look in his eye. The gentle way he forced Yoongi's jaw wider.

He's nearly half hard already just recalling it. The bathroom door creaks open and he flings himself on his stomach to hide it.

Hoseok emerges from the steamy bathroom in the soft grey shorts he always wears around the apartment, toweling at his wet hair. So lean and strong, skin such a pretty caramel tan. It does nothing to help the situation in Yoongi's boxers.

Hoseok notices he's awake and smiles, hair going in all directions. "Morning, kitty."

Yoongi nearly chokes. Heart thumping in his chest, he tries to scoff at the nickname but he's never felt so aroused and loved at the same time.

"Morning," he stammers, deep rasp of morning in his voice.

It seems to give Hoseok pause, a hungry look in his eyes. But he takes a deep inhale and falls back into the couch.

"It's so fucking hot," Hoseok whines, ceiling fan barely fluffing his hair.

"What'd you take a hot shower for?" he teases with a yawn.

A pout as he fans his face with a tattered magazine. "I can't take a cold shower, I just can't."

Yoongi sits up, shoving a pillow in his lap. "Let's get ice cream."

"For breakfast?" Hoseok giggles, throwing a leg up on the back of the couch.

"It's lunch time anyway," he shrugs.

It doesn't take much to convince him. "'Kay. Gotta go grocery shopping anyway."

-*-

It's a relief, the way they get along so naturally still, after last night. Not that he believes in it, but it feels a bit like destiny anyway, how they fit so naturally despite the insanity of their circumstances. Still, Yoongi can't shake the feeling that it's a little too much like nothing has changed. All day long, Yoongi finds himself reaching out for Hoseok without realizing, dropping his hand just before he literally clings to Hoseok and embarrasses himself.

It's stupid to be embarrassed, he tells himself. We kissed for hours last night.

But Hoseok wasn't reaching for him, and he's terrified that it means something.

At the ice cream shop, he set his hand down on the bench right next to Hoseok's, but Hoseok didn't take it. Walking down the cramped sidewalk, dodging dogs on leashes and moms with strollers, their hands brushed at least twice, but Hoseok still didn't hold it. At the supermarket, they reached for the shopping cart at the same time, but Hoseok just dropped his hand and trailed behind Yoongi.

Yoongi stands in internal crisis in front of an open freezer door, staring at bags of frozen peas and corn but not really seeing them. Hoseok had run back to the dairy aisle for string cheese. It's fine if Hoseok doesn't want to hold my hand every hour of the day. Since when do I need all this touchy-feely clingy kissy bullshit?

But he knows the answer: since being Hoseok's cat and being cuddled and kissed and petted all day and night. He craves it now, needs it, and it's scary to be that dependent on someone. It's not like him.

He sighs into the freezer air and pokes at a squishy bag of peas. Nothing he can do about it. It's no one's fault that Hoseok's not in love with him "yet", or doesn't feel like he's a slow-draining battery whenever he's not touching Yoongi. It's not Hoseok's fault that all Yoongi wants is to curl up in his lap and have his hair petted.

He wants it so bad he almost whines. He shuts his eyes and shifts from one foot to the other, conjuring up the feeling of Hoseok's long fingers.

As if Hoseok can read minds, suddenly there are arms snaking around his waist and a chin on his shoulder.

"Hey kitty," Hoseok says, and Yoongi melts.

For five whole seconds, nothing is wrong on earth. Then, the arms and warm body against his back are gone.

"Jungkook just texted me, he wants to come over with his boyfriend tomorrow. Is that okay?"

"Yeah, sure," Yoongi answers, pushing the cart down the frozen food aisle. The world is a little dizzy, reassembling and sobering itself after the bliss of Hoseok's arms.

It's funny, he thinks, that Hoseok even bothered to ask him if it's okay, his cat, his human freeloader. Hoseok walks beside him, looking up a recipe for dinner and telling Yoongi how Jungkook went back to his hometown last week to visit family before starting the new semester next week, but he's excited to see Yoongi again.

Hoseok snorts, flipping to a new text from Jungkook. "He says 'I bet he still looks like a cat'. That's true," Hoseok says, tucking the phone back in his pocket.

"Do not," Yoongi argues, not about to admit the way it makes his stomach tickle to hear Hoseok say so.

"Do too," Hoseok mocks playfully, hand coming up to scrunch through Yoongi's hair.

His heart does a humiliating leap. Finally!

But then the hand drops, Hoseok reaching to empty the cart at the self checkout.

Late that night, he waits for Hoseok to finish rinsing his face so he can spit out a mouthful of toothpaste. Doubt and anticipation and overbearing summer heat has him exhausted and out of sorts. He watches Hoseok rub at his soapy cheeks and wonders where the hell he's expected to sleep tonight.

Back on the couch? Was last night a one time thing? Should I ask? Would Hoseok be uncomfortable if I just laid down in his bed? Would I send the wrong signal if I just went straight for the couch?

He spits and gargles and washes his face. By the time he leaves the little bathroom, Hoseok is already in bed, scrolling through his phone, leg swinging lazily behind him. Yoongi stands in the middle of the apartment, trapped and fidgeting.

Bed? Couch? Ask? Can't ask. Couch? Bed?

"What're you doing?" Hoseok snickers, reaching for his phone charger.

"Hm? Ah, no-nothing, I just uh, you know how sometimes you feel like you forgot something but I... I guess I didn't." He sighs and turns toward the couch.

Hoseok laughs and flops back against the pillows with a yawn. "Well hurry up and come to bed, then."

Oh. "Okay."

-*-

If Yoongi was asked, he would say he's not nervous to meet Jungkook again or his boyfriend. He would be lying.

There's already a stack of plates on the table for when the pizza comes, beer and soda in the fridge. Nothing for him to do to distract himself. Hoseok is flopped over the arm chair, clicking through TV channels.

He sits down on the sofa and tries not to look too stiff. Hoseok's not holding his hand again, still, and he hates it more than he can admit. The thing is, Hoseok had asked if it was okay to tell him anything, everything like he had before, but Yoongi can't help but feel like he's holding back.

With an inhale big enough to sear at his lungs a little, he sinks back into the couch and huffs.

The doorbell rings and Hoseok jumps up to get it. Preparing to smile past his nerves, Yoongi sits up straight.

The door swings open with a creak. His blood turns cold and run out his feet.

"It's you!" Yoongi bellows, leaping to his feet like there was a fire under his ass.

"It wasn't my fault!" the guy shouts back, thrusting a lump of something out in front of him like an offering to appease an angry god.

Clothes folded, and a wallet on top. Yoongi would recognize that wallet anywhere. It was the first nice thing he'd ever bought himself, though he really couldn't afford it.

He yanks his stuff out of the guy's hands. If Yoongi still had fur, it'd all be poofed straight out. They stare at each other, unsure. "So, what the fuck!" Yoongi demands.

Growing more and more concerned at Yoongi's weird behavior, Hoseok steps toward him.

A hand closes gently around his wrist, a perplexed little frown on Hoseok's face. "He's the one!" Yoongi shouts.

"The one?"

"My name is Jin," he offers, but Yoongi ignores him.

"The pink hoodie! The crystal holding, fucking voodoo ass-the circle on the- did the thing-" Yoongi stumbles over his words, hands waving in complex gestures that don't make any sense. "Made me a cat!" he finally yells.

Jin deflates. "I didn't make you a cat, that wasn't what the spell was," he muttered on top of Hoseok's "ohhhhh" of realization.

The three of them throw tense glances. "Can I explain?" Jin asks, motioning to Hoseok's sofa.

They nod and sit down, the three of them quiet and uncomfortable.

Just as Jin is about to speak, there's a little series of muffled whimpers and scratching at the front door.

"What-?" Hoseok jumps back up and opens the door.

A fluffy black puppy is sitting there, eyes wide and pitiful up at him.

"Kookie," Hoseok chides. "Why-"

"You made him nervous yelling at me!" Jin yells at Yoongi, but he doesn't really seem angry. "He's been anxious about this all day. He shifts when he panics, you know."

He laughs at the pathetic way Jungkook slinks over to the couch. "Come here, baby," Jin says softly, patting his lap.

Jungkook, not as small of a puppy as he thinks he is, struggles to curl up in Jin's lap. He finally settles for one leg dangling off the end of the sofa.

He stares up at Yoongi, big, dark pleading eyes. It's unexpectedly comforting to see Jungkook again, like the feeling you fall into when family piles out of the car at Christmas.

Yoongi gives him a fond smile and ruffles the fuzzy ears.

Jungkook's tail thumps a hopeful beat against Jin's arm. He wiggles forward, and again, until he can rest his chin on Yoongi's leg and stare up at him, black sparkly eyes.

"Traitor," Jin giggles, poking at the puppy's back legs strewn across his lap.

"So," Jin starts, and everyone straightens up. "I want to explain. Jungkook told me what you told Hoseok happened to you, and it was a, uh... very familiar story," he smiles delicately.

Finally having the decency to look a little sheepish, "The spell was, ah... to attract love. Fated love." Jungkook flops himself back onto Jin's lap, fond and squirmy and annoying.

Yoongi swallows hard and wills himself not to look over at Hoseok. "Why'd you do it in the middle of a god damn alleyway," Yoongi grouses.

"I didn't have any time!" Jin moans, all drama. "The window of alignment between Venus and Anteros was only open from 9 to 12 on that day only, and my shift started at 10," he grumbles.

Trapped between demanding to know what the hell Anteros is or why Jin didn't just call in sick, he shakes his head to fling loose the thoughts. He settles for, "What's that got to do with me turning into a cat?"

"I have no idea, to be honest. I thought you totally fucked up the spell until I met Jungkook," he says fondly, patting the dog's tummy.

Yoongi snorts. "Or maybe you just happened to meet Jungkook and your spell sucked."

"Are you doubting my magic?" Jin asks in a low, dangerous voice. The air feels tight, like one spark could light the whole room on fire.

But then Jin beams an angelic smile and it dissipates. "It obviously worked for you though, hm? Why you had to be a cat, I dunno. Magic is..." Jin trails off with a goofy shrug.

Yoongi can't answer, can't look at Hoseok. Hoseok's not touching him as it is, still not holding his hand. The added pressure of suddenly being Yoongi's "fated love" is....a lot.

"Thanks for keeping my stuff," Yoongi says quietly, changing the subject.

Jin nods, finally reaching for a handful of chips Hoseok put on the coffee table. "It wasn't my fault, but, I felt bad. Maybe I shouldn't make magic circles in public," he concedes. "Oh! But that reminds me, all your boxes."

Yoongi perks up. He had totally given up on all his stuff in his brand new apartment he could barely afford. His laptop, his keyboard, the nice mic he'd saved up for. A new mattress and microwave, even. He had assumed the landlord had dumped it all out on the street after the first month of missed rent. The thought had stung for months, but what could he do?

"The landlord called your phone after a few days," Jin explains, pointing to the cellphone he'd tucked into Yoongi's shoe. "I told him you uh, had a family emergency and had to move back home. He took that month's rent anyway. But! I rented a storage shed and moved all your boxes there." He fishes around in his pocket and hands him a little key.

"You didn't have to do that," Yoongi says, staring down at the key. It's just stuff, but it was everything Yoongi owned in this world. Every bit of it he had worked hard for in several jobs he hated. Every single thing he managed to buy had proved a point, proved his parents wrong, proved the ugly things he told himself wrong. He blinked back the threat of tears.

"I felt bad." Jin shrugs.

"Even though it wasn't your fault?" Hoseok says wryly.

Jin nods in agreement with a satisfied smile, holding out a chip for Kookie to scarf down. "Agh, slobber," he whines, wiping his hand on the puppy's dark fur.

Kookie barks in protest, nibbling on Jin's fingers.

The doorbell rings. "Pizza guy," Hoseok announces, grabbing his wallet as he opens the door.

"Hi there! There's some clothes out here?" The pizza guy says, handing over a couple boxes.

"Clo-? Ahh, must've dropped them. Laundry day," he laughs, swooping down to collect them.

He shoots Jungkook a dirty look, but the puppy just pants happily, Jin and Yoongi both absently petting his soft fur.

"Well, shift back if you want pizza, ya nerd," Hoseok says, pelting a sock at Jungkook before opening up the boxes on the dining room table.

Jungkook leaps behind the sofa and yips at Jin, who tosses his clothes to him.

Jungkook shifts, hunched down behind the couch for modesty as he dresses. It wouldn't matter anyway, everyone was preoccupied with hot pizza and cold beer. "Hi Yoongi!" he's finally able to say, dopey grin over the back of the couch as he shuffles into pants. "It's nice-weird- to see you," he giggles. "Your voice is lower than I expected."

"I know right," Hoseok mutters. Maybe it shouldn't be anymore, but the fact that Hoseok notices things about him, has opinions about him, the fact that Hoseok exists at all in relation to him is a little amazing.

Weak protests and a small smile around a bite of pizza do nothing to stop Jungkook and Hoseok prattling on about how Yoongi totally does look like a cat. Hoseok tells him something Yoongi did yesterday that was "soo something cat yoongi would have done" and Jungkook's whole face scrunches up in laughter.

Inside, Yoongi is preening at being noticed and talked about like this, but it's washed over with a simple misery: why won't Hoseok just pet my hair again, then? Or cuddle me on the couch? Or anything?

The night goes on, awkwardness disappearing along with the pizza. Jin and Jungkook are the brattiest, most loving couple Yoongi's ever met. They rag on each other constantly, escalating until they're giggling like little shits and rubbing their noses together or Jin's pulling Jungkook into his lap and shoving pizza in his mouth to shut him up.

Honestly, Yoongi likes them both, a pair of likable weirdos. He can't help but think this is what he was hoping would happen when he moved here a year ago. Friends with good vibes who don't expect anything from him, a job, a nice place to live, a gorgeous boy who smiles at him and stops time.

"Hey Jin? Why did Yoongi change back, finally?" Hoseok asks after a while.

"Why? Want me to turn him back into a cat?" Jin laughs, a stupid hiccuping laugh that's awfully contagious.

"Don't you dare," Yoongi says around a mouthful of pizza crust.

"Ah, petting him is just not the same," Hoseok says dramatically, scratching his fingers through Yoongi's hair.

Everyone laughs and is nice enough not to joke about Yoongi's tomato red ears.

"It was the 333rd day," Jin explains simply. Yoongi's barely listening. Hoseok's fingers are still threading through his hair, slow, gentle scratches against his scalp. Finally touching him, petting his hair like he'd craved for days, finally, finally.

"3+3+3 is 9. 9 is completion." Jin said it like it was obvious.

"I wish he could shift," Jungkook pouts a little. "It was nice."

"It was nice," Yoongi agrees. There's a content smile on his face already from Hoseok's hand in his hair but he turns it toward Jungkook.

"Sorry baby," Jin says, handing Jungkook the last slice of cold pizza. "The spell for shifting involves a lot of weird shit and a lot of pain. It's not a fun potion. Also, I think we'd have to kill a cat and that's very no bueno."

Hoseok's fingers brush across Yoongi's temple and the tip of his ear and his eyes flutter shut. Jungkook snickers around his food. "I swear I can hear him purring right now."

"Shut up," Yoongi mumbles, but his eyes won't seem to stay open.

Hoseok pushes Yoongi's head down until it rests against his shoulder. Yoongi slumps against him, suspended in between sleep and waking, laughter and Hoseok's fingers drifting around him.

He wakes an hour later swearing he didn't fall asleep, just in time to say goodbye. Jin promises to text Hoseok the address of Yoongi's storage shed, and Yoongi promises to add Jin's number when he reactivates his phone.

"And mine," Jungkook reminds him, with a stern point.

"And yours. Good luck with school on Monday."

Jungkook groans at the reminder, trudging out the door with Jin pushing him and laughing.

-*-

They're slicing up a watermelon and strawberries at the kitchen counter a couple mornings later, still too hot to eat anything else for breakfast. Hoseok is humming to music from his laptop, chopping a giant half of watermelon and popping strawberries in his mouth.

As is apparently now the norm, Yoongi fell asleep the night before in Hoseok's bed and woke at dawn with Hoseok's arm wrapped tight around his waist. But as always, when he wakes again hours later, it's to an empty bed and an indifferent, amiable Hoseok.

"Do you regret it?" Yoongi blurts out.

"Regret what?"

"Kissing me, do you regret it? You didn't hold my hand all day the last three days," he complains. His face is on fire. It's the single most embarrassing thing he's ever said, he's sure of it. He really didn't mean to say it, he meant to shut the fuck up and let things happen how they may.

Wasn't Hoseok giving him enough? A place to live, food, forgiveness, not flat out rejecting his feelings.

The knife lowers. Hoseok seems taken aback. "I didn't want to just-I didn't want you to think I was just... taking advantage of you? Doesn't it seem unfair to do whatever I want to, knowing you'll let me because of, y'know, how you feel?"

"I told you, it's super fair," he argues. He stops short of telling Hoseok "you can do whatever you want with me" or "please, please touch me more", not knowing how to make the truth sound less needy. "We gotta be honest, right? Like, live honest? You said you weren't gonna hold back."

It's not the most fair thing Yoongi's ever said. After all, he's been holding back like crazy, second guessing and shy and stupid.

"You spoiled me when I was a cat," Yoongi grumbles. "I never cared about, a-about hugs and stuff before." He mumbles the last part so badly he's surprised Hoseok could even hear him.

"I just... don't want to rush anything." Implying, "I don't want to hurt you," and that in turn, "I might not feel the same way." And yes, that would hurt.

The knife clatters to the cutting board and Hoseok steps closer. "But, I guess just 'hugs and stuff' is slow enough," he hums.

"Don't say 'hugs and stuff', it's embarrassing." He can still feel the heat in his cheeks.

"Now Yoongi. You know what they say, if you aren't even ready to talk about it, you're not ready to do it," he jokes, brushing his fingers through Yoongi's hair.

"Shut up," he laughs, but his eyes fall blissfully closed, leaning into Hoseok's hand. "Slow is fine. I was just worried, I dunno. You make me stupid."

"Slow is fine?" Hoseok asks with a grin.

"Slow is fine."

They move to the couch, fruit and coffee mugs in hand. Yoongi pulls the fan closer and makes Hoseok laugh as they eat, telling him all about the annoying customer he had to deal with yesterday. It still stands true, nothing on earth is more worthwhile than making Hoseok laugh that bright, ridiculous sound.

"Ahhg, it's September fucking first, what's it still so hot for," Yoongi groans, downing the last gulp of coffee. "I can't go on like this. What if I never feel cool again? I don't remember what it feels like, Hoseok."

"Hey, you don't work today, right?" Hoseok sits up, moving the plate of watermelon rind aside. He looks as excited as he could in the heatwave lethargy. "I have a great idea."

Two hours later, Yoongi stands in a borrowed pair of Hoseok's swim trunks at a water park six train stops away. Kids and high schoolers mill and splash through the neon blues of swimming pools and water slides.

"My hometown is three stops past this one. I used to come here at least three times in the summer as a kid." Hoseok smiles, cheeks flushed a plummy pink from the heat. "Well, let's go," he urges, wiping sweat from his brow.

A girl screams like death as she bullets down the steep waterslide Yoongi cranes his neck up at. "You don't seem like the waterslide type."

"I'm....ah, not," Hoseok chuckles. "But I love that one," he points to what looks like an endless curly straw before dragging Yoongi by the hand.

They ride a couple more of the tamer slides, but tire of waiting in sweltering lines quickly and make for the wave pool. A five minute warning sounds, then one minute, and suddenly the wave pool is slammed with people and floaties and huge inner tubes. Yoongi feels strongly they shouldn't be allowed, scowling at the way they shove into his head when the waves start up.

But Hoseok's smile is blinding and he laughs and yells with every growing wave. One wave slams Hoseok into Yoongi, another bigger one sends Hoseok's arms flinging around Yoongi's neck. They're crammed tighter and tighter together, ridiculous neon floats pressing in all around them, gasping and laughing and sputtering.

The waves cause an incessant chaos around them, half drowning Hoseok's laughter, jostling their bodies together until Hoseok's legs latch on to Yoongi's waist under the water. His hands go around Hoseok's back to steady him, of course they do.

Wave after wave, wet bodies flowing in rhythm and squished against each other, a huge barrier of floats and flailing elbows and knees on all sides. Yoongi's hand flies up to protect Hoseok from a kick to the head. Desire sparks in Hoseok's eyes to mirror Yoongi's, and his blinding smile simmers to a smirk.

And then they're kissing again, mouths submerged every few seconds by another wave. Everything wet and slick, the heat of Hoseok's mouth contrasting with the cold pool makes Yoongi pull him impossibly closer. Shrieks of children, the drag of rubber floats on skin, splashes of water surround them but all Yoongi can hear is the little whimper from Hoseok when he drags Hoseok's lip between his teeth and clenches his fingers through his wet hair.

"This isn't slow, Hoseok," he gasps, remembering their conversation earlier.

"Mm," Hoseok agrees, and chases their lips back together.

The alarm blares and the waves settle down, suddenly causing a mass exit from the wave pool. He really could've stayed there kissing Hoseok until the end of the day or the end of time but the stampede of kids and giant floats send him up on wobbly legs to trudge out of the water.

They made their way to the lazy river ride in relative silence. Hoseok winds his fingers through his, and Yoongi tries his best not to think about kissing him into the wall or shoving his hand down his shorts.

The lazy river ride is heavenly, a weird kind of heavenly that includes loud strangers and neon plastic and dinosaur statues towering around them. Yoongi floats through a bright yellow inner tube, arms and chin flopped over the side.

"Why are there dinosaurs?" he asks Hoseok, nodding to the T-rex looming overhead. Their fingers cling loosely together, keeping their floats connected as they meander through the water.

"Why not?" Hoseok smiles from his inner tube, something hungry still gleaming in his eyes. He slips down through the middle of his float, abandoning it to cling to the side of Yoongi's instead.

He pulls himself up a few inches to kiss Yoongi, meant to be a chaste peck. But then their lips are moving together, slow and deep, a pace to match the water they're floating through.

Everything feels like a dream, searing hot sun, the swirl of cold water, Hoseok's nose grazing across his, the way their tongues dart across each other every other kiss.

"I shouldn't be doing this." Hoseok laughs softly against his lips.

"Why not?" Yoongi retorts, and tries not to make it sound like a whine.

"Because, supposed to go slow," he reminds Yoongi or himself, hoisting himself up on to the side of Yoongi's float a little more.

"Why?" Definitely sounds a little like a whine this time.

"Don't remember right now," Hoseok murmurs, and he's kissing him again, deeper than before, head tilted to push their tongues closer.

Yoongi used to hate PDA, too self conscious to ever do more than hold hands in public. But as they finally emerge from the lazy river, pruney fingers and swollen lips and finally hungry for food, he can't even remember a single other person existing besides the two of them. If nothing else ever became of them after this day, if Hoseok tires of him and he has to learn to live with a hole in his heart, he wouldn't regret a thing, he realizes.

Not wanting to hope too much, Yoongi tries to stay anchored in a nice, practical restraint of feeling through the rest of the day. It's hard though, when Hoseok seems to have decided that kissing him is his new favorite thing. He kissed him on the bus, swaying together at every turn and bus stop. He kissed him in the convenience store when they were supposed to be choosing something for dinner. He kissed him up against the apartment door instead of unlocking it, keys pressed against his back. When all was said and done, it took hours to finally get home and Yoongi could barely feel his lips anymore.

The transit from front door to bed was a blur. Somehow a key slid into the lock, the bags of food made it to the table, shoes were kicked off, a light switch was flicked. All he remembers is Hoseok's hungry lips and wandering fingers until the back of his knees his the mattress.

Hoseok looms over him in the dim light, chest rising and falling as he thinks. Skin itching and begging for Hoseok to touch him more, he wishes to god that Hoseok would stop thinking so hard. "Please," falls the plea from his lips, a tiny breathed syllable but it snaps something in Hoseok.

"Don't want me to hold back?" Hoseok confirms, kneeling around Yoongi and pushing him down to the bed as Yoongi nods fervently. The way Hoseok's hands glide up his shirt sends him straight to the afterlife. "Just do whatever I feel like? Whatever I want?" he asks into the curve of Yoongi's neck, pressing hesitant kisses in between.

"Do whatever you want. If it all fucks up, it all fucks up. Hoseok, please," he begs again, curling his hands through Hoseok's soft hair. Because it's true, magically sprung or done out of order or out of rhythm with the other or any other way, love is a risk, and nothing is gained in love by being who you think you should be instead of who you are.

"Please," he whispers softly again, tugging Hoseok's shirt off in one slow, smooth motion. Their eyes are glued together, Hoseok silently asking, Are you really sure? and Yoongi sending back a wordless Yes, yes.

He tries not to shake when Hoseok dips down to kiss up his stomach, nosing his shirt up as he goes, but he can't help it. It's all he's wanted for months. Not the way a craving is finally fed; this is different. This is a dream too big to hope for, the kind that could devour your heart if you let it in. Dangerous, almost, to trust that it's actually come true.

A hot tongue curls around his nipple and his whole body shudders. Hoseok smiles against his chest. "So pretty," he tells him, scraping teeth over skin. "So pretty, Yoongi. I want you so bad."

"You have me," he shivers. Hoseok finally pulls Yoongi's shirt the rest of the way off and tosses it to the floor. Rain has begun to thump and patter on the balcony and rooftops, the kind of rain that brings a crisp cool wind as if summer is finally saying farewell.

The clatter and twinkle of windchimes through the window is followed by a distant rumble of thunder. They pull apart, eyes searching each other in the dim yellow light from the kitchen. An undercurrent of worry is in Hoseok's eyes.

"This isn't going slow," he murmurs, hands smoothing up and down Yoongi's chest. "But I want you. I like you so much."

Yoongi can't help the smile that takes over his face. "Good."

"But you love me," Hoseok protests. "Love me for sure. And I- I might not know that feeling even if it slapped me in the face." An insecure laugh and his fingers dig into Yoongi's sides like he's fighting to control himself.

"I bet you'll love me after I suck your dick," he shrugs, and grins when Hoseok's laughter peals through the room.

"I'm serious! What if-"

He lunges up to kiss Hoseok's mouth shut. "You're thinking too much. No two people feel the exact same about each other, or call the same feelings by the same name. Just fucking kiss me if you wanna," he complains.

"I wanna," Hoseok agrees, chasing Yoongi's mouth back down to the bed. "All the god damn time."

His veins feel like rivers of sugar when Hoseok moves to suck on the sensitive side of his neck. The wind flutters the curtains up behind Hoseok, cool breeze blooming goosebumps over his skin. It feels like the most natural thing in the world, moving his hands up Hoseok's lean back to tangle in his hair.

"Just touch me if you wanna," he whispers, gliding his hands back down to squeeze Hoseok's ass.

Hoseok groans against his neck. "I wanna."

---------------

*This is not my story but from @ themarmalade on AO3*