"You are off to a stupendous start, boy," Hornroot chastised as he flew nearby. I hadn't even heard him following me. "Attacking the Overseer on your first meeting? You can be sure our Lady will hear plenty of this when I return to her, barring that we aren't executed immediately!"

Was that bird talking again? All I could hear was the rapid drumming of my heart and the whistling of the wind in my ears. The tunnel was going on forever. Each new torch that was lit only revealed more dirt and roots.

The owl called out something else, but he sounded much farther away. I looked back for a moment and saw nothing but darkness. A heavy weight fell on me when I saw the torches putting themselves out just as quickly as new ones were being lit before me.

I gritted my teeth. I couldn't worry about it.

I turned back just in time to see a large hand take up my vision.

It gripped tight across my face and lifted me into the air with ease, though I kicked and thrashed at its owner. In my attempt to pry the hand off, I managed to catch a glimpse at my attacker through his fingers.

I stopped struggling when I felt the shortened nubs of his index and middle finger. "Stallion?" I said, dumbfounded as I held on to his arm, the fight draining out of me.

He met my eyes, but he wasn't looking at me. His eyes were as dead as they were when the witch had her hold of him. Except there were no purple veins or pale skin this time. Just white scars, scraggly beard, and unflinching expression.

"Stallion, it's me," I said, wincing when he clenched his fingers tighter against my face. "What are you doing?"

"You will not harm them," Stallion's voice echoed through the tunnel. Emotionless, hollow. The dark shadows reflected off the single lit torch twisted his scarred face and contrasted heavily with the calm certainty in his words.

"I'm not trying to hurt anyone. I just want to see them." I closed my eyes to fight the sudden desire to cry. I gripped his arm harder instead. "Damnit, Stallion, just let me see them."

"Foxy?"

It was Stallion's voice again, but different. I opened my eyes. He was looking at me now— really looking. His mouth opened and I felt pressure start to alleviate from my face when a large owl swooped down between us and wracked its sharp talons across Stallion's forearm.

"Shit!" Stallion cursed, dropping me.

He retreated a few steps, gripping his fresh wound. His eyes scanned the low ceiling of the tunnel. I looked as well, but couldn't see anything in the darkness. And, as before, I couldn't hear him flying.

"Hey, we're cool, scary owl guy, we're cool!" Stallion said, holding up his hands as he stepped more into the torchlight.

He immediately had to duck when Hornroot came down at him again from the shadows. He swooped low, tearing off part of Stallion's shirt as he passed.

"C'mon, Foxy, a little help here?!"

"Oh, right, Hor— er, owl, that's enough, he's on our side!"

"Alex? Alex, is that you?!"

A new voice joined ours as it echoed down the tunnel. A small form soon followed it, bursting from the shadows and embracing me with a fierce hug around my stomach before I knew what was going on.

I stood there, rooted to the spot, before wiping my eyes and returned the hug. It was so warm. When was the last time I hugged someone?

"Thank god," Mary whispered into me, so quietly I barely caught it. "Thank god you're alright."

"I'm glad you're alright too," I whispered back.

We didn't part until another newcomer coughed loudly. Mary and I both flinched and separated. I was reminded of a similar situation before, with Kat, and had to swallow a heavy feeling of guilt.

We were met with a rather amused smirk from Stallion, still holding a bleeding arm, and a haggard but alive Mr. Copper, who appeared to be just the opposite of amused.

"When Stallion went charging out here, I feared the worst, Foxy," Mr. Copper said, holstering his brass gun. "I suppose it's good to see that you still have your humanity, in any case." Though he holstered it, he kept his hand on the handle of the gun. "Might I ask where the Overseer is, though?"

"Who—oh, Edgar, uh..." I looked back and pointed somewhere into the black void of the tunnel behind me. "I think he's still somewhere back there."

"Unharmed?" the Stalwart asked me.

"Do you really have to ask that?"

The look he gave me told me he did.

"Yes," I muttered.

"Good." Mr. Copper walked past me; I held my breath when our shoulders almost touched. "Mouse, stay here and watch him while I retrieve the Overseer."

"Yes, Master," Mary responded, bowing.

Bowing. I swallowed down the bile building in my throat. Instead, I focused on what Stallion and Mouse were wearing. Silk clothes, like mine, only Stallion's get up was green and Mary's dress was blue. They clung in such a way to accentuate his muscles and her curves. I didn't notice until then just how baggy mine were in comparison.

"Are you alright, Alex?" Mary asked me, catching my eye.

"Yeah, fine."

I dropped my eyes to the dirt floor; both their feet were bare, like mine.

"Yeah, Mouse, he wasn't the one that just got cut up by the king of all owls."

"Shit, I'm sorry about that," I quickly cut in, but when I looked up I saw Stallion was smiling, showing me his arm.

It was no longer bleeding. Only the tear in his clothes remained as evidence he had been attacked.

"I'm only kiddin' man," he said, patting the arm. However, he lowered it when my eyes happened to catch the missing index and middle fingers.

"I'm sorry about that, too," I said. I tried to say it with conviction, but it came out weak, meaningless. I could still remember doing it. Separating bone from muscle. The blood.

Stallion closed the hand, put it slightly behind him. "Yeah, it sucks, but it's sort of like the risks of the job. I should be thankful I didn't lose more than just a few fingers, right? I mean, hell, just look at Mutt..."

That made us all quiet for a moment.

"Yeah," I spoke up, still quiet, still weak, "and speaking of—"

"I mean, you stopped them, the witch and her familiar," Stallion went on.

He probably didn't hear me. His dark eyes reflected the fire from the nearby torch as he gazed into it. "I wish I could have gotten a few good hits at that boar for takin' my fingers, but you took care of them, made sure they never hurt anyone again. That's all that matters."

I had something I was going to say, but I could no longer remember what it was.

"Stallion?"

He moved away from the fire. He looked at me. Smiled at me. I opened my mouth, but felt a hand on my shoulder before I could speak. I expected it to be Kat, prepared to silence me the moment I turned around.

"Do you mind going back to check on Mutt, Stallion?" Mary asked, giving Stallion a little smile as she shifted her gaze from me to him. "There is something I need to discuss with Alex and I worry about leaving him alone for too long."

He glanced between us. I wasn't sure what to do. When I felt Mary's hand tighten on my shoulder, I finally dropped my eyes, only to look up again when I heard Stallion snort.

"Don't think that little hug of yall's slipped by me," he said with a wink, already turning away. "If you guys needed some alone time all you gotta do is ask."

"No, Stallion, that's not—"

Mary elbowed me in the ribs.

"Thank you for understanding," she called over my groan of pain.

Stallion waved as he continued to walk away. The torches lit up one by one as he walked down the tunnel. The path took him around a bend and when the last torch went out behind him all that was left was the darkness.

"So, what am I missing here?" I turned to Mary, rubbing my newly bruised ribs.

She stared out into the darkness for a moment more, face free of expression, before engaging me with a new, refreshed smile."We needed a quick fix for a messy situation. There was a lot of tension between everyone involved after the incident with the witch. Mr. York, one of our own who has Knowledge over memory, has been having his hands full trying to clean up and cover over the mess at school and we only had a small reserve of his tea—"

"So he's the asshole responsible for making us forget our lives?!"

"Indirectly, yes," Mary said, rubbing part of her silk dress between her fingers. "But he's also the only reason we're still alive right now."

I folded my arms. "How's that?"

"Do you remember what happened before you passed out? What we did?"

I had been trying my best not to remember, but seeing Stallion's hand had opened the floodgates. The fire, the vines, the gun. Mr. Mallard lying on the ground, half dead after Mutt nearly killed him. But...what happened after that?

"The last thing I remember is what Mutt did to him."

Mary's smile was long gone, but her expression then was like seeing the odds of another smile plummeting. "Is that really the last thing?"

"Yes..." I answered, cautiously. My heart was working overtime as I stared at her face, as she searched into my eyes. "What happened?"

"Do you really want to know?"

She didn't break her eyes away from mine. I became aware of her holding one of my hands. I couldn't remember her ever grabbing it.

I swallowed. "Yes."

"I killed Mr. Mallard."

She didn't lower her gaze, didn't let go of my hand. In fact, her grip on it tightened. I was just barely aware of it.

"You...killed him?"

"Does that bother you?"

"I..."

I wasn't sure how I felt. He was a monster, he ruined so many lives— he deserved to die. But did he deserve to be killed? Was it right for Mary to kill him? Did she have the right to kill him?

"Does it bother you?" I asked, instead.

"No."

Her answer came so quick. She didn't even blink.

"He tried to kill us. Even if we forgave him for everything else he did, we can't forgive him for that."

Forgiveness was the last thing I would think of. I hated him. I would always hate him. But would I have killed him, if given the chance?

I had the chance, once, but was stopped by...

...them.

"Hey, Mary, are the kids safe?"

That gave her pause. To her, it was out of nowhere. I couldn't believe I had been so easily distracted.

"The ones that are left, yes."

She let go of my hand. I was glad she did. If she had waited even a second, I might have unintentionally crushed it.

I tried telling myself not to get mad. Not at her, of all people. She wasn't there. She didn't understand. Don't be mad at her. Don't be mad. Don't—

"The Community is going to be watching after them for awhile."

I gripped my empty hands into fists. "I want to see them."

Our eyes met. I thought about breaking the contact, but I shouldn't hide it, or be ashamed by it. They were still important to me. It didn't matter what Mary thought, what anyone thought. I had to see them.

"You can't."

"Why not?" I hissed before I could stop. Mary stiffened, backed up a step, but I advanced on her. "Why can't I see them?"

"For your safety, as well as theirs," she answered, her voice still firm even as she backed into the dirt wall of the tunnel.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"They all have the potential for Knowledge. At least one of them has already manifested it. And any one of them could turn dangerous like their mother, or like Maple."

Without thinking, I shoved my fist into the dirt wall, close to her head. She didn't flinch, even when the impact drove a hole into the packed dirt and shook the walls around us for a second.

"What the hell...that's...that's...."

My fist was shaking. My entire body was shaking. Why did it turn out like this? After everything I said I would do...

A distraction. I needed a distraction.

"So, Stallion doesn't remember anything?" I managed to ask, though my voice was a barely controlled whisper.

Mary didn't answer right away. I couldn't look up to see what her expression was. If I moved even an inch, I didn't know what I would do next.

Don't answer me. Don't talk to me. Let me scream. Let me fight. Let me find them.

"He remembers everything up until Fawn's children attacked you guys at the asylum. He's been told that everyone survived the attack, found who was responsible, that Mutt lost his leg, Mallard died, and he lost his fingers and hit his head pretty bad during the attack to stop the witch."

"And he believes all of that?"

"If he doesn't, he's playing along really well."

Why couldn't it have been me?

"Alex?"

"Why couldn't it have been me?!" I shouted.

I could move again. I pulled my fist away. Mary was staring me full in the face, her hands clenched together, closer to her heart. She looked so strange without her glasses. Even her hair was different, cut short and tied into a tight ponytail. It was like she was a different person.

"I want to forget again! I don't want these memories...this anger...this pain. It's killing me!"

Mary reached for me. Her hands came close to the side of my face.

"It's going to be okay, Alex. You're going to be—"

"I almost hurt you!" I backed away from her hands. I gripped my stomach as a stabbing pain settled deep inside. "Talking like it didn't matter. Like what happened was just another day. I wanted to hurt you so bad for saying that and...it scares me."

I backed up until I hit the other side of the dark tunnel. I lost my feet and sank to the ground. There was another stab in my gut and I wrapped my arms around my stomach as I bent over. I couldn't bear to see the expression on her face.

"The decision definitely wasn't unanimous with everyone in the Community," she said. "Some of them still firmly believe you are the biggest danger to us all. I wonder how they'd feel if they knew you, of all people, were on their side about that."

I chanced a glance. Mary was sitting against her side of the tunnel, opposite of me, her legs tucked in beside her. When our eyes met, she offered a gentle smile. It was small, timid, and patient. Like the ones she used to smile a long time ago.

I tried one of my own. It felt forced, but it made the stabbing in my gut a little less intense. "Well, it's nice to know there's multiple people with crazy magical powers who have it out against me."

"They would not dare try anything more than bemoan their idle concerns over a familiar of our Lady," Hornroot announced, revealing himself from the shadows by silently landing on my shoulder.

"Where the hell have you been?" I shot, trying to hide my surprise, though Mary still giggled at my reaction.

"Ensuring your safety, boy, since you seem to struggle with doing so yourself."

"I see you and Hornroot are already getting along well."

"Oh yeah, like two peas in a— wait, Hornroot, you said you're trying to appear like a regular owl, right? So what's with the talking?"

"Oh, don't worry, a Stalwart and his familiar have special privileges," Mary answered, standing up and walking towards me. "It's our job to protect the witches, and part of that is knowing as much as we can about each witch and their familiar."

She reached out to pet Hornroot, and I was a little taken back when he let her. I thought I even heard him coo as she gently ran her fingers down his wing.

"That seems a little risky, even to a guy who still knows next to knowing about all of this," I thought out loud, standing up and smiling inwardly when Hornroot ruffled his feathers at the broken contact with Mary. "I mean, no offense to Mr. Copper or anything, but he got taken out pretty soundly by Fawn and her children. If she wasn't so crazy, she probably could have gotten a lot of information out of him."

"You're right, my Master certainly isn't the strongest of the ones in our Community; honestly, he's probably one of the weakest. But being Stalwart isn't about being the strongest; it's about being capable of doing the right thing."

"And you think he does the right thing?" I asked.

Mary walked back over to the wall of the tunnel, ran her fingers along the dirt. She really was different, and not just because of her hairstyle. The Mary I was talking to now wasn't the one who nearly got hit by a truck because she was lost in a book. This person was someone now part of the nightmare, someone who could kill a person and not think twice about it. This was Mouse, not Mary.

"Being weak puts him in a unique position," she answered, leaning against the wall. "It makes it easier."

"I see."

I had almost forgotten what we were talking about. Stalwart, witches, magic, familiars. It did not all fit together for me yet, but I was starting to see a picture. How they fit together. How I fit with them. It only made me wish I could forget more. I didn't want to understand any of it.

I sat myself back down against the wall, opposite of her. Hornroot flapped his wings slightly but remained attached to my shoulder.

"In the end, they chose Stallion because the rest of us were all on the same page," Mary answered after a moment of silence. I couldn't see her face, which was cloaked by shadows. "Mallard had to die. He had gone too far. Mutt, Kat, and I knew it in the end. You might not admit it, but I know you know it too."

I didn't answer her, but she was right. Even if I wasn't the one who killed him, I wasn't sorry that he was gone. He was the reason for all of this. For taking away my memories and for leaving me with ones I couldn't get rid of.

"But Stallion didn't understand," Mary went on, tilting her head up to the dark ceiling. "He only ever sees the good in people. From what I heard, Mallard was a lot kinder to him and Mutt than he was to the rest of us. Regardless, to keep the peace, they chose him."

"I guess it makes sense," I muttered.

Stallion was probably better off. He seemed better off. All of the bad memories, all of bad things we did— that I did, to him. For him, it was like they never happened. He could be sad that he lost his fingers, that Mallard was dead, but he could let go, he could move on.

"Hornroot?"

I nearly stood up in shock when I saw Mary kneeling in front of me. I hadn't even noticed her getting up. Was I really that out of it?

"Yes, Mouse, you wish something of me?" the owl on my shoulder responded.

"Could you go back and check on my Master for me? He's been gone for a while now, and I'm a little worried."

Hornroot did not respond right away, which was a first for him. I looked over to see his large yellow eyes staring straight into Mary's, unblinking.

"I'm afraid my Lady has tasked me with watching—"

"I will watch A— Foxy for you." Mary stood up so she could bow before us. "Please, you can travel the distance much faster than I. I promise I will keep the princess safe."

I felt my heart skip a beat.

"The princess?"

Mary's face was red when she raised her head to us. When our eyes met, she quickly stood and focused her attention on the owl.

"Nothing, it's nothing. An old force of habit." She kneeled again and grasped a few of the long feathers from the owl's wings in her hand. I could only watch on in awe at her ability to recover. "Hornroot, would you please do me the honor of accepting my request?"

His feather's ruffled again. Slowly and gently, he removed his wing from between her fingers.

"I suppose a request from a Stalwart's familiar is the same as a request from the Stalwart himself. And, as a humble servant of my Lady, I am obligated to cooperate with the Stalwart."

"You have my thanks, Hornroot," Mary said, flashing her brightest smile.

I felt something twist again in my gut as the owl released himself from my shoulder and took off into the darkened tunnel without a sound.

She watched him go before turning back to me, her smile gone.

"I see you still have a way with words," I couldn't help but say.

God, this feeling. Was it really already nostalgic to hear her talk like that again?

"When you spend most of a year lost in books, it's sort of hard to find your way again, you know?" She grabbed my hands again and I froze up as she looked them over. "I was sort of lost in the...heat of the moment back at the cabin, but it really scared me, seeing you burned up and...everything."

"Yeah, that was kind of part of the reason I asked Mr. Copper to convince you to stay away," I admitted, thinking back.

She locked gazes with me over our intertwined hands. "You did?"

"It was a dangerous situation," I tried to explain. "I thought I was already losing Kat, Mutt, and Stallion...I don't know what I would do if I lost you."

"You would keep going, no matter what," Mary answered for me. When I opened my mouth, she placed a finger over it. "Please, no more of this kind of talking right now. There's a reason I had the owl leave. I needed for us to be alone."

There was that feeling again. The twist in my stomach, the pounding heartbeat.

"Why?" I asked against her finger.

She removed it. She started to lean down towards me, her lips pursed. They were really wet and red up close. My entire mouth felt dry in comparison.

Did I want this? All the bad memories, all the future nightmares. I didn't know where I would go from here, how I would go on from here. I couldn't see the kids, I couldn't save them how I had wanted to. I couldn't forget the little flower blooming from his chest. I couldn't forget her body riddled with my cuts and poison.

It was my fault my fault my fault my fault.

Her hands moved to my shoulders, locking me in place. My own hands were rising up to her hips. She looked really good in silk. It felt so smooth.

I closed my eyes. I brought my face up to hers, and waited.

Was it wrong to want this?

"Are you still with me, Alex?"

Her words tickled my ear. I opened my eyes. She was still kneeling over me, hands on my shoulders, but I could no longer see her face or her lips.

I tried to swallow the new lump in my throat."Yeah, Mary, I'm with you."

"Good."

She patted me on the shoulder before standing back up. I didn't move to see her face or follow her form as she walked out of my line of sight. I could hear footsteps down the tunnel, torches were lighting up the darkness.

"Let's just play our parts for a little while longer."

I didn't really know what she meant. In the end, she was as much a mystery to me as everyone else. She had her own Master, her own problems, her own bad memories. But she was still my friend and I was still her friend. Whatever else there could be between us, whatever else would try to come between us, that fact was all that really mattered.

I got up from the floor and followed her.

...

*Authors Note*

Seems like things have only gotten more complicated with his fellow familiars while Alex Foxy was asleep. Stallion missing crucial memories, Mouse acting all mysterious and secretive. Just what is a lone fox to do when lost in such a dense forest?

Let's hope he can figure it out.