A/N: I'd like to thank my beta-reader. If you recognize it from the Wonka community, I don't own it.

Warning: Suggested autoeroticism.

Maria heard violent coughing from behind the door, and saw Mr. Wonka open it while holding his hand to his mouth.

"You all right?" Maria asked.

Mr. Wonka just nodded his head and continued coughing into his hand, his eyes watering like mad.

"Mr. Wonka, I was just telling Maria what a privilege it is to work under the great candy man," Martin said.

"Water," Mr. Wonka wheezed, flashing Martin a look.

Maria immediately got some water from the water cooler in the corner of the room and gave the paper cup to Mr. Wonka, who downed it in one gulped. He handed the empty cup back to Maria.

"Thank you, Miss Gonzalez."

"No problem, Mr. Wonka," Maria said, throwing the paper cup into a nearby wastebasket.

"Mr. Anderson, shouldn't you be in the sales department?" Mr. Wonka said to Martin.

"Of course," Martin said, cheerfully. "I just thought that I'd help you make your new secretary feel welcome."

"Miss Gonzalez is not my secretary," Mr. Wonka said. "Not yet, anyway."

"Then I wish Miss Gonzalez the best of luck," Martin said in a humble tone that made Maria roll her eyes. "Now, I'm off to play my small part in maintaining this factory."

Mr. Wonka smiled. "Yes, Mr. Anderson, run along now. Your very small part makes you indispensable, elsewhere."

Martin left, leaving Maria alone with Mr. Wonka.

"Miss Gonzalez?" Mr. Wonka acknowledged, opening the door to his office.

Maria followed him inside and took the seat opposite Mr. Wonka's desk, recognizing Scarlett's sketchbook on top of it. Mr. Wonka took his seat at the desk and opened the sketchbook, looking at the drawings.

"So, Miss Gonzalez, what was your last job before coming here?" Mr. Wonka asked absentmindedly, as he took a cigar from the stand.

"I worked as a waitress at a diner," Maria answered, as Mr. Wonka calmly smoked his cigar, flipping through Scarlett's sketchbook.

After a few minutes of silence, Maria cleared her throat.

"Am I boring you, Miss Gonzalez?" Mr. Wonka asked, not taking his eyes off the book.

"I told you that my last job was working as a waitress, in a diner," Maria explained with slight exasperation.

"So you did, and that tells me you have no experience working as a secretary," Mr. Wonka stated between puffs.

Maria leaned back, and lit a cigarette. "Actually, I used to work as one, but I had to quit," she explained.

"In favor of waitressing?"

"No, I got married," Maria said, silently adding to herself that it was to a womanizing dog.

"There's no ring on your finger," Mr. Wonka pointed out.

"That's because I'm divorced," Maria said, bitterly. "I'd rather not talk about it."

"Is that why you and Miss Rivera are now roommates?" Mr. Wonka asked, intrigued.

"That, and she's my best friend," Maria added.

"Interesting," Mr. Wonka said, perking up as he turned to face her. "How did you two meet?"

"I was working at the local library, and I saw her studying," Maria explained, taking a puff. "I took her under my wing, and we've been friends ever since."

"What do you mean, 'you took her under your wing'?" Mr. Wonka asked.

"Well, she was very shy and bookish," Maria explained, her voice taking on a warning tone. "I feel very protective of her."

"So, you and Scarlett both share a love of reading," Mr. Wonka stated.

"No, the only things I read in my free time are Vogue and gossip columns," Maria said. "I needed a little extra spending money and the library was hiring."

"Extra spending money for what?" Mr. Wonka asked.

"I told you, I read Vogue," Maria said, waving her cigarette around. "Trying to keep up with the latest fashions is expensive."

"You took a second job so you could buy expensive clothes?" Mr. Wonka said, amused.

"Hey, looking good doesn't come cheap," Maria defended.

"Sorry, dear lady, I couldn't hear you over all of the absurdity in the hallway," Mr. Wonka said, continuing to look through Scarlett's sketchbook. "You and Miss Rivera seem very different, yet the two of you are friends."

"What can I say? She looks up to me," Maria said proudly, as she took another puff.

Mr. Wonka laughed, quickly turning it into a cough.

Maria smirked. "You know, it's weird that you'd ask so many questions about Scarlett while interviewing me."

"I'm sorry, dear lady, I'm a tad bit hard of hearing," Mr. Wonka responded. "Could you speak a little louder?"

"I said that it's strange that you'd ask so many questions about Scarlett," Maria said, innocently. "Just like it's strange that you keep looking in her sketchbook."

Mr. Wonka turned away from the sketchbook with a smile on his face. "Dear lady, I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about."

"I was just saying that, if you wanted to get on Scarlett's good side, she'd really appreciate it if you hired me," Maria suggested.

Mr. Wonka cleared his throat. "Thank you, Miss Gonzalez, I will consider hiring you."

"Thanks, hon, you won't regret this!" Maria exclaimed, about to leave.

"One more thing, Miss Gonzalez," Mr. Wonka said.

Maria stopped at the door. "Yes?"

"I need to call your previous employer."

"Sure," Maria said, grabbing a piece of paper from her purse. "I'll give you the Diner's number."

"Actually, I need to contact the person who employed you as a secretary," Mr. Wonka told her with a sneaky smile.

Maria gulped. "What?"

"Which word didn't you understand?"

"Mr. Wonka, is that really necessary?" Maria asked, nervously.

"Miss Gonzalez, if you expect me to hire you, I need to contact your previous employer," Mr. Wonka explained, calmly.

"Does it have to be the one I worked for as a secretary?" Maria asked, twirling her hair and smiling.

"Yes," Mr. Wonka told her absentmindedly.

Maria sighed, gave Mr. Wonka her old boss's number, and left. Great, in one day, she prostituted her best friend, and now Mr. Wonka was going to call her ex-husband. Well, that last one might not be so bad. Her ex-husband was in advertising, and anyone at the Agency would kill to get the Wonka account. As for Scarlett, she'd just have to see if Mr. Wonka's crush was one-sided. If it wasn't, that would make Maria a matchmaker. Maria folded her arms under her breasts and leaned against the wall, hoping that everything would work out.

Scarlett opened the door to see the walls changing to different colors of the rainbow, the art supplies arrayed like peacock feathers, and the table surrounded by well-dressed men, laughing and smoking.

"U-um, hello," Scarlett greeted quietly.

The men ignored her presence until Scarlett cleared her throat.

"Are you lost?" one of them asked.

"A-actually," Scarlett began nervously, "Mr. Wonka hired me to work here."

The entire group stared at her like she'd lost her mind.

"Here?" one of them said.

"Yes," Scarlett said, looking down at her feet. "I-is that a problem?"

"Ma'am, could you step outside for a minute while we, ah, confer?" one of them asked.

"S-sure," Scarlett said, stepping outside, and shutting the door.

Scarlett held her ear to the door in order to listen to what they were saying.

"A woman?" one of them exclaimed. "Has Wonka lost his mind?"

"And she's not even pretty!" another of them said. "What's Wonka smoking?"

Scarlett's eyes narrowed as she grabbed the doorknob and thought about barging in on those guys, and telling them what was going on in her head. Then she thought better of it. They were right, the Art Department was no place for a woman. It was like her mother always taught her, a woman's place was in the kitchen.

Scarlett felt tears roll down her cheeks as she walked along the hallway, trying to remember where the bathroom was, when she bumped into a tall, skinny redhead, knocking all his papers to the floor.

"Sorry," Scarlett said.

"That's okay," the man told her, as he scrambled for the papers on the floor. "Could you help me pick them up?"

"Sure," Scarlett said, picking up papers and smiling shyly, hoping the man didn't notice the water in her eyes. "I'm Scarlett."

"I remember you," he said. "You're that girl Mr. Wonka was showing around the Chocolate Room. I was the guy he caught trying to smoke."

"Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Miller," Scarlett told him.

"Just call me Ryan," he said, as they finished collecting every last sheet of paper. "Thanks for your help, could you hand the rest of them to me?"

"Sure," Scarlett said and was about to until she read the first few sentences aloud. "'The robot felt its circuits— "

"I'll take that," Ryan said, blushing as he grabbed the papers from Scarlett's hands.

"Is this a short story?" Scarlett asked him.

"Yeah, it's a work in progress," Ryan said, hastily.

"It looks interesting," Scarlett told him.

"Thanks," he said. "Do you like sci-fi?"

"No," Scarlett lied. "But I know a good story when I see one."

"Thanks, I've got to get back to the Chocolate Room," Ryan told her. "And could you not tell Mr. Wonka about my story?"

"Um, sure," Scarlett said, wondering why Ryan would want to hide that from Mr. Wonka.

"Thanks, I really appreciate it," Ryan said, as he left.

Scarlett watched him go, back to the Chocolate Room, where he worked for Mr. Wonka. She worked for Mr. Wonka. Her mother might tell her she belonged in the kitchen, but Mr. Wonka told her she belonged in the Art Department. She turned on her heel and walked down the hall. It was just too bad for her co-workers if the 'conference' wasn't over when she got back.

Willy dialed the number of Miss Gonzalez's former boss, and waited for him to pick up the phone.

"Euphoric Vision Advertising," the man answered. "What do you need?"

Willy rolled his eyes. It just had to be an Ad Agency. "Are you—" Willy looked at the paper in his hands. "Daniel Brown?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"My name is Willy Wonka and—"

"Wait a minute!" Mr. Brown interrupted. "You're Willy Wonka? The Willy Wonka?"

"Last time I checked, yes. I was—"

"Tell me, sir, are you satisfied with your current advertisers?"

Great, another vulture wanting to cash in on his profits.

"I don't really have any current advertisers," Mr. Wonka answered. "However, I was—"

"Then how would you like to sign up for Euphoric Vision Advertising?" Mr. Brown said. "I guarantee that, with us—"

"Actually, I was calling about your former secretary, Maria Gonzalez," Mr. Wonka interrupted, before the vulture could further antagonize him.

"You mean my ex-wife," Mr. Brown said, bitterly. "What about her?"

"She just interviewed to become my secretary, and I was wondering what your opinion of her is," Willy said.

"She's a hispanic Marilyn Monroe," Mr. Brown explained. "She makes a nice decoration, and she knows quite a few 'bedroom tricks'."

"So you didn't hear the word 'secretary'? I'm a little deaf myself, but it doesn't bode well for your firm that you can't hear the question your potential client is asking. Shall we see if the second time's the charm? How is she as a secretary?" Willy asked exasperated.

"Well, she's got looks and talent. Only problem is, she doesn't know when to keep her mouth shut," Mr. Brown said bitterly.

"So, she's competent?" Willy asked.

"Yeah, she takes the phone calls and can organize your files," Mr. Brown said. "I was sorry she had to quit when we got married, but it was for the best. I mean, who wants a working wife?"

Mr. Brown laughed.

"Thank you, Mr. Brown, that was all I needed to hear," Willy told him and hung up before Mr. Brown could try to recruit him.

He went to the waiting room to see Miss Gonzalez sitting on a chair filing her nails.

"Miss Gonzalez, you have the job," Mr. Wonka told her.

Miss Gonzalez shot up. "Thanks, sweetie!"

Willy cringed at more than the nickname, wondering if he was a little hasty hiring her.

Scarlett's first day on the job was interesting, to say the least. The workers in her department treated her more like a secretary than a co-worker, assigning her tasks such as getting them all coffee. She tried to stand up to them, but she had trouble putting her thoughts into words. However, she did run into Ryan a few times and he seemed to be an interesting man. Now, it was time to go home, and Scarlett stopped by Mr. Wonka's office.

"Looks like you got the job," Scarlett observed, seeing Maria at the desk outside Mr. Wonka's office door.

"Yeah, as long as I never file my nails in public in this factory again. You here to congratulate me?" Maria said, smiling.

"Actually, I'm here to see Mr. Wonka," Scarlett told her. "But congratulations!"

"Thank you!" Maria said, pointing to the door. "You'll find Mr. Wonka at his desk."

Scarlett knocked on the door.

"Come in," Mr. Wonka called.

Scarlett entered to see Mr. Wonka looking over some papers on his desk.

"Mr. Wonka," Scarlett began hesitantly.

Mr. Wonka turned to see her and smiled. "Miss Rivera, how was your first day?"

"Fine," Scarlett lied, feeling her heartbeat quicken. "I was actually wondering if I could get my sketchbook back."

"Sure," Mr. Wonka said, taking her sketchbook from on top of his desk and handing it to her.

"Thank you, Mr. Wonka," Scarlett said, holding it to her chest. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Actually, there was one more thing I wanted you to talk to you about," Mr. Wonka told her, looking through the right-hand lower drawer of his desk. "Remember when you told me that you've never read Gone With The Wind?"

"You mean when I pretended that I did because I thought it would get me the job," Scarlett said, blushing.

"Well, I happen to have a copy of that book," Mr. Wonka told her, as he pulled a copy of Gone With The Wind from the drawer. "And I was wondering if you'd like to read it."

"Sure, I'd love to!" Scarlett exclaimed.

Mr. Wonka handed her the book, and Scarlett felt warm fingers brush against her own.

"Thank you," Scarlett said, feeling her face go scarlet. "I'll be sure to give it back to you when I'm done."

"It's not a problem, dear lady," Mr. Wonka told her, in a suave tone. "Good day, Miss Rivera."

"Good day, Mr. Wonka," Scarlett said, holding the book in her left hand, and reaching for the door with her right. "I hope I see you tomorrow."

Scarlett left to see Maria near the door, and quickly shut it.

"What were you doing outside Mr. Wonka's door?"

Maria laughed as she ran her fingers through her hair. "Just wanted to make sure he wasn't acting like a jerk."

"He's not a jerk!" Scarlett defended, as she placed Mr. Wonka's book in her purse. "He's a true gentleman."

"Really?" Maria said, with a smirk. "Do tell."

"Well, first he showed me the Chocolate Room," Scarlett explained.

"The Chocolate Room?"

"It was swell!" Scarlett said dreamily, as she took her raincoat and hat from the hangars. "The room was made entirely out of candy, and the river was pure chocolate!"

"You're serious?" Maria asked skeptically, as she took her own raincoat and hat from the hangars.

"Yeah, didn't he show you?" Scarlett asked.

"No, as soon as Mr. Wonka gave me the job, he just had me sit at my desk," Maria explained. "Guess he didn't think showing his secretary around was necessary. So, Chocolate Room, keep going."

"Then he showed me his Square Candies that Look Round!" Scarlett exclaimed, as they left the factory.

"'Square Candies that Look Round'?" Maria said, confused.

"They're little square candies with eyeballs that look around the room," Scarlett explained.

"Still not following."

"They look round, as in 'Square Candies that Look Round'," Scarlett explained as they walked to their car. "It was so cute!"

"Yeah, sure," Maria said absentmindedly, still in the dark, but not caring.

"Then we talked about Sherlock Holmes!"

"The guy with the deerstalker cap?" Maria asked.

"He rarely wears that hat," Scarlett explained, exasperated, as they finally got to the car.

"You're the nerd," Maria said, as Scarlett looked through her purse for her keys. "Forget it, I'm driving."

Maria held her hands out for the keys.

"No way, it's my car!" Scarlett responded, angrily.

"The way you drive it, I'm surprised you still have a car," Maria remarked. "Or a license."

"I'm not that bad!" Scarlett defended, as she pulled out the keys.

"Tell you what, I'll drive the car and you can give me all the juicy details about your crush on the candy man," Maria teased.

"I don't have a crush on Mr. Wonka!"

"Your face is red, you haven't shut up about him, and you act like you're walking on air," Maria pointed out. "Trust me, honey, those are all signs of a crush."

"That's ridiculous!" Scarlett exclaimed, unlocking the driver's door. "What sort of woman gets a crush on her boss?"

Maria cleared her throat angrily.

Scarlett laughed nervously. "Present company excluded, of course," As an apology, Scarlett handed Maria the keys. "You want to drive?"

Scarlett lay in her light-pink bed, her head resting on the pillows, wearing nothing but her full white body slip as she read Gone With The Wind. When Mr. Wonka told her that Scarlett O'Hara wasn't beautiful, she wondered how so many men could fall for her. Then the book explained that Scarlett O'Hara had a charm about her that made many men forget that she wasn't beautiful. Scarlett Rivera wondered if she might have that same kind of charm, and if she did, could she make it work on Mr. Wonka?

Where did that thought come from? Mr. Wonka was her boss. If he knew she was thinking about running her fingers through his curly blond hair, his body warm against hers, inhaling the sweet smell of chocolate as her lips touched his hungrily, and then...

He would think she was disgusting! Scarlett tried to concentrate on the book, but she ended up thinking impure thoughts about Mr. Wonka. No, she had to read. Reading would get these thoughts out of her head! It didn't though, and she put Mr. Wonka's book on the nightstand when she realized what she had to do. It was unbecoming of a lady, but, she told herself, trying to be the good little girl her mother wanted her, warned her, to be, it would be for the last time. Then Scarlett could get back to her book.

A/N: Well, what do you think? For those of you who've read How Bad Could It Be, that is the same Ryan that hangs out with Kat and Maria and runs the coffee shop. I told you that I reuse some of my OCs.