Insecurity is self sabotage. If you want to fly you have to first see your wings. ~ Unknown

                               • • •

The drive from my house to his takes only about 20 minutes. Feeling slightly nervous, I head to the front door and ring the bell.

Instead of Abel answering like I expected, a tall slim dark skinned woman opens it.

One of the first things I notice is her multicoloured loose dress accessorised with multiple bracelets, rings and necklaces. Her hair is pulled back into a long black ponytail with a red bandana wrapped around her head. Based on her appearance only, she seems sort of eccentric but not in a bad way.

"Hello dear! You must be Keziah! Come in come in." She gestures towards the inside of the house and shuts the door behind me.

"Almost everyone is already in the pool but Abel wanted to wait for you first!"

She has a very loud voice that's soft at the same time. It's quite calming actually.

"Well it's nice to meet you." I finally say.

"You too dear. About time as well! Abel never stops talking about you!"

I smile shyly before hearing the sound of a throat clearing. "Mum, please stop."

"Oh Abel, Keziah's here! You said she was beautiful but I didn't realise she was this beautiful!"

I shuffle my feet out of awkwardness but smile timidly at both of them.

Abel on the other hand scratches the back of his head out of embarrassment but smiles back at me.

His mum looks between the both of us as we look at each other and decides to go.

"Well, I'll leave you to it then! Have fun Keziah!"

She turns around and walks away leaving just the both of us.

"I'm glad you could make it Brown Eyes." I watch his eyes rake over my body, taking in my outfit choice. "And you look gorgeous, but that's no surprise."

"Thank you Abel."

He takes my bag from me and holds it in his hand before directing us both upstairs to get changed.

"Sorry about my mum. She can be a lot sometimes but she means well."

"No it's alright. I actually like her personality, it's refreshing."

Abel smiles down at me. "I'm happy about that. I want you to like my family."

Before I can respond, we reach Abel's bedroom.

"You can change in my bathroom and I'll be out here."

Entering the bathroom, I quickly remove my clothes leaving just my bikini on. After checking my bag, I realise I didn't bring anything to wear on top. I really don't want to walk around the house with my body exposed like this.

"Abel! Do you have a shirt I can borrow to wear over my swimsuit?" I yell through the door to the other side.

"Yeah, one sec."

Opening the door slightly, I peek through and grab the shirt that Abel is stretching out to me.

I slip it over my head and grab my belongings before finally leaving the bathroom.

Walking back into his room, I find Abel laying in his bed with only a pair of swimming trunks on. His whole body is exposed showcasing the abs I did not know he had. I mean, I could tell he was kind of muscular but wow.

What I would give to run my hands all over them.

Abel notices that I'm ready and stands up to walk towards me but stops halfway.

Nervously, I tug on the bottom of his shirt. "Thanks for letting me borrow this, I forgot to bring my own."

Even from the distance that I am at, I can see his eyes turn a shade darker.

"It looks way better on you than me anyways Brown Eyes. I love you in my clothes."

My eyebrows raise at his statement. "Oh really? Maybe I'll just start borrowing your clothes more often then."

"I have absolutely no objections to that beautiful."

Abel continues walking towards me and places his hand on the small of my back moving us forward. Just from the slight touch, I can feel his heat searing through my clothes and onto my skin. Shivers rack through my body reminding me of the intense affect he seems to have on me. A quick glance at him leads me to believe he didn't notice what he does to me.

"So where exactly is this pool you have?" I ask him.

"It's actually in this kind of glass house connected to our main house. I'll just show you since it's hard to explain."

Feeling intrigued, I follow him in silence.

We leave his house through the back door and out into his garden. I immediately notice how well taken care of it is. From the back door, circular stone pathways lead all over the garden. Following them, we go underneath a vine arch which is covered in a variety of flowers giving it an exotic look. This leads to a vivid green open space with several different plants occupying certain areas as well as a fountain. To the left of the garden is a swing chair and a slide and swing play set. But what stands out the most is the glass house. There are two slide doors that lead into the house which have a flower pot on each side. All the windows are large with white window frames and thin curtains on the inside.

Realising I'm done with my gawking, Abel starts walking again obviously intending for me to follow.

He slides open the doors allowing us to go in. We walk the short distance down a hallway to the main area where the pool is located. Straight away, the sound of water splashing and happy laughter hits my ears reminding me of the multiple siblings that Abel has. Do I even remember all their names?

"Keziah!" Tatiana And Tristan start swimming towards me as fast as they can. They're both wearing those bright orange armbands that everyone is subjected to until they are old enough.

"I didn't think you were ever coming back, it's been a long time you know!" Tatiana places her little hands on her hips in what I'm heading is supposed to be in an angry manor but just manages to make her more adorable.

"Sorry Tati, I promise to come and see you more." This clearly appeases her for the mean time as she quickly returns back to the rest of her siblings.

"Did you bring Nolan with you?"

"Not today Tristan, maybe next time though."

Tristan huffs loudly feeling disappointed.

"Alright." He drags out this one word for a long time exaggerating his sadness.

"Ignore him, he's just trying to make you feel guilty." Abel nudges me with his shoulder. "Yeah, Nolan does the exact same thing."

"Abel!" Zane calls out to him from his spot in the pool. "I see you brought my future girlfriend." He winks flirtatiously at me.

Abel scoffs and crosses his arms while I raise my eyebrows in amusement.

"Stop wanting what you can't have Zane." Abel states.

"The truth is, she probably wants me more than I want her. Isn't that right Keziah? You missed me didn't you?"

"I don't date younger guys."

"Age is nothing but a number darling!" He Yells in a funny accent.

All of a sudden, Denzel dunks Zanes head underwater. "I was getting tired of his irrelevant talking."

Oh, thank goodness, I thought he'd never stop.

Zane comes back up for air and starts splashing Denzel for his actions. At least he's fully occupied now and can leave me alone.

I walk over to where Jamison and Monroe are with Abel following closely behind.

"Hey guys."

"Hi Keziah." Jamison says while throwing a ball to Monroe.

"Hi." Monroe responds quietly in a timid manor completely opposite to her siblings. Thinking about it now, she actually reminds me of Violet from The Incredibles before she gained her confidence. Maybe all she needs is a boost in the right direction.

Abel suddenly does a massive cannon ball into the pool shouting in the process. Since I was closest to him, I get drenched in water from my head to toe.

"Was that necessary?" I wipe the droplets from my eyes and squeeze out the water from Abel's shirt onto the ground.

Abel flicks his hair backwards and flashes me a cheeky smile. "Absolutely."

I shake my head at him and try to hide my smile at how cute it really was.

Abel starts to do some laps, alternating between swimming on his back and on his front.

I take a step forward and sit down on the edge of the pool dipping my legs in. I lean back on my hands and take in the atmosphere; Denzel hitting Zane probably because of another ridiculous comment he made, Tatiana and Tristan helping each other practise their swimming while Jamison and Monroe continue to mess around with the ball.

I focus my eyes back into Abel and find him doing backstroke. His strong arms flex with every movement emphasising the power that he has. At the angle that I'm at, I can clearly see his abs which contract along with his arms. Put them both together, and you have me swooning way more than I'd like to admit.

The feeling of water being splashed on me, pulls me out of the Abel trance I was in.

"Why is everyone so insistent on splashing me today?" I mumble with irritation.

"Well this is a pool." The sound of a very deep voice has me turning my head.

"I know that. But it doesn't mean I constantly have to be splashed." I say to Denzel.

This time, he doesn't respond but just stares at me with questioning eyes. This man is very intimidating I'm telling you. He has me squirming beneath his gaze which is something I absolutely hate.

"I see you watching him. And when you're not looking, he watches you. Like now."

I swiftly turn towards Abel and indeed find him staring in this direction. He smirks at me, then returns to his swimming.

"If you both like each other that much, then why aren't you together?"

"I-I'm not too sure. I assumed Abel either isn't that into me or just isn't ready."

Denzel sighs, "Despite my brothers' confidence and intelligence, he can be pretty dumb sometimes." I snort at that.

"He'll come around Keziah."

That was really weird. Who would have thought I would have spoken to Abel's older brother about Abel.

Still thinking deeply about our brief conversation, I almost miss Abel swim up to me. "What was Denzel saying to you?"

"Oh, nothing much really, we just had a general conversation." What? I can't exactly admit it was about him geez.

He stares at me for a second before continuing on. "So, are you ready to get in yet?"

"Nope." I pop the 'p' for dramatic effect.

"Oh really? I think you might need some convincing." Abel slowly drags his hands over my bare legs stroking them softly.
My breath hitches at the small contact making my heart beat faster. He begins to move his hands higher and higher all without breaking eye contact. The intimacy of the situation makes me nervous yet strangely excited.

"Okay I'm convinced!"

Abel immediately removes his hands and shakes his head before glancing back up at me through his long lashes.

I stand up from where I was sitting and fiddle with the bottom of Abel's shirt. Feeling brave, I look him right in the eye and take his shirt off before throwing it to the side. Abel stares wide eyed at me as if in shock from my boldness. I watch him as he looks me up and down in a slow yet seductive perusal, lingering on my legs and chest area. His eyes have turned that stormy blue shade like when he's happy or excited. His mouth hangs open slightly as he looks back at my face.

"I-uh. W-wow. Um-"

"Hey Abel! Stop drooling at my woman!"

Obviously, it was Zane who said this.

The comment snaps Abel back to reality causing him to throw a ball that was lying to the side at Zane's head.

I briefly hear Denzel asking him if he's even capable of keeping his mouth shut leading to a response of 'why should I?'

I finally jump into the pool, catching Abel's attention.

He swims closer to me and pushes my braids off my shoulders.

"Give me a warning next time."

"A warning for what?"

"For when you decide to wear a bikini like that."

"I didn't realise I had to."

"You do if you don't want me dying before my time." He jokes with a laugh.

"You're so dramatic." I say while shoving him away and swimming towards the others.

"I like the colours of your swimsuit Keziah! And it even matches Abel's."

It only matches a little bit because we have the same shade of blue.

"I like yours even better than mine Tatiana."

"Really? You can wear it another time if you want!"

"I'm afraid it might not fit me so you'll just have to keep it for yourself."

"Oh. Okay then."

I laugh at our conversation and watch her swim around.

Abel gently tugs on my arm, getting me to spin around to face him.

"Are you having fun?"'

"I am, thanks for inviting me."

"It's my pleasure Brown Eyes." Abel bows dramatically causing me to laugh.

His wet hair has begun to fall over his eyes again tempting me to push it back. Since I'm still not sure on where I stand and because of my conversation with Denzel, I resist.

For a little while longer, we all stay in the pool playing games and just lounging around. Eventually, the others get out and leave me and Abel behind.

I look at the clock and see that it's just after 5; we've been in the pool for over 3 hours. No wonder my skins all pruned.

"Abel, do you mind if I leave the pool now?"

"Not at all Brown Eyes."

I swim to the edge of the pool and pull myself out. I grab the towel from where I threw it earlier and turn back to face Abel who's still in the pool. I find him staring at me with what looks kind of like adoration but also desire. Typical.

Clearing my throat, Abel focuses on my face and smiles sheepishly. I wrap the towel around me completely and end up looking like a burrito.

"I should probably head home now."

"No! Don't go yet, it's not that late."

"I know but-"

At that moment, Abel's mum walks in causing me to stop mid-sentence.

"Keziah, would you like to stay for dinner tonight? I'm making my special couscous!"

I look towards Abel who's nodding his head and staring at me with pleading eyes. I succumb to both of them and agree to stay longer.

"Fantastic! The food will be ready in like an hour so I'll see you then!" His mother spins in her heel and hums her way out of here. She's such an interesting woman.

"We can head back up to my room if you want." Abel leaves the pool and heads towards me. He grabs his towel and uses it to briefly dry his hair and body. The remaining droplets roll down his caramel coloured body making him all the more enticing. His hair has curled even more and looks a shade darker from the water. Right now, he looks like a full-blown Abercrombie model and it is kind of making me feel a little bit insecure.

Because of that, I leave the pool house and start heading back to the main house.

I retrace my steps back to his room knowing that he's following closely behind.

Quietly, I grab my clothes and head to his attached bathroom. Abel watches me silently with intense eyes probably feeling confused at my sudden change in attitude.

Before I fully shut the door, I ask him if I can have a shower.

"Yeah, of course. I'll get you a spare towel."

In the meantime, I turn on the water and wait for it to get hot. I pick up my clothes and intend to put them in a corner away from the shower.

"Here you go." I'm so startled by his reappearance that I accidentally drop my clothes into the running water.

I groan loudly at my mistake feeling annoyed and frustrated.

Obviously sensing that I'm close to an emotional breakdown, Abel tries to calm me down.

"Don't worry about it Brown Eyes, I can just get you some of mine."

He takes my wet clothes to put in the dryer and returns with a pair of black tracksuit bottoms and a grey hoodie. I thank him and proceed to shut the door and get in the shower.

While washing off the chlorine, I feel myself getting overwhelmed by my insecurities. Standing next to Abel earlier, it made me think about how unequal we are based on looks alone. With his exotic skin tone, dark curls and deep blue eyes, he's an absolute Adonis. And I'm, well I'm just me. He's got the body of a swimmer; lean but very well-toned. It makes me think that he'd prefer someone skinnier than I am and just less me.

I don't like feeling this way, but I still can't help it. I'm hit by such an intense wave of emotion, that it causes several tears to roll down my cheek mixing with the shower water. I sniffle quietly, not wanting Abel to hear.

I stay under the faucet a bit longer and try to rein in my sadness and put on a happier face.

I step out and dry myself before putting on the clothes Abel gave to me. The bottoms are way too big and keep falling down so I pull on the strings as tight as they can go but they still feel pretty loose. On top of that, the hoodie swallows me whole. I roll up the sleeves on my arms to stop them from restricting my movement too much.

This really isn't how I planned to look when meeting Abel's parents. Well, I've already met his mum but not his dad. I hope it doesn't make him see me in a certain way.

I finally leave the bathroom and find Abel laying on his bed watching TV; It looks like he showered too and dressed up in some basketball shorts and a long sleeved shirt.

"Your clothes are a bit big on me."

"No, you look great Brown Eyes. They suit you way more than me anyways."

I shake my head in disagreement and tug at the bottoms. "You don't think your dad will mind that I'm dressed like this right? I didn't intend to meet your parents wearing your clothes, especially at dinner."

I bite my bottom lip out of nerves and play with the hem of his hoodie while looking everywhere except at him.

I feel Abel's presence near me just before he grabs my chin gently to face him. "Clothes don't make a person Brown Eyes. My dad will like you because of your personality, not because of what you're wearing."

And with just those few sentences, I feel slightly more calm. The feeling of my insecurities are still there, but for the sake of Abel and this dinner, I push them to the side.

For the next half hour, we entertain ourselves by watching some TV. Having learnt my lesson from before, I text my parents to let them know I'll be home later than planned. While doing this, Abel plays with my hair, twirling it around his fingers. Most of the time, I can't even focus on what is playing because of the closeness between Abel and I. His scent is intoxicating and he makes my heart beat rapidly. It's such a foreign feeling; being so affected like this by someone. It's actually kind of..nice.

A gentle knock on the door has Abel telling the person to come in.

"Dinners ready." Monroe Says this so quietly that I almost miss it and then runs away.

"Come on Brown Eyes. I'm starving." He slaps his hand on his stomach and rubs it enthusiastically.

I chuckle at his boyish behaviour and follow him out the room.

It is then that I realise something. I actually remembered all his siblings names. Points to me people. Points. To. Me.

• • •
A/N:
It's so easy to feel insecure about yourself; whether it's your body or your personality and I don't think most people realise. It's a lot simpler to hide it and act like nothing bothers you even though it does. People fight battles with themselves daily about their own insecurity and that feeling of worthlessness can become so unbelievably overwhelming sometimes. But everyone's beautiful in their own special way.
Make sure to try and talk to someone about how you're feeling if you can. Keeping it bottled up often makes it worse.

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