As the months went by Christina grew huge.  Her baby bump was nearly the size of a watermelon, and probably weighed as much.  She was outgrowing her maternity clothes as fast as she bought them.  But even with the weight gain she was happy that it was all for her little boy.  She loved feeling him move and kick inside of her.  Of course she was now peeing every few minutes like a racehorse but it was worth it.

As for their marriage things were going smoothly.  Robbie was the devoted husband.  He wore his wedding band proudly and wasn't shy about letting every woman that looked at him that he was off the market.  He went off to work in the morning and came straight home to his family.  

"Everything is looking good," the doctor said at a recent visit.  "The baby is doing great."

Christina looked at the screen where the baby's image was.  "Hi, Emmett.  Aww, look at his chubby little fingers.  Look at his face, he's sleeping.  Must be worn out from all the kicking he did all week."

"Wow, he's really getting big." Robbie said as he looked closely.  "Like a giant, that one."

"No kidding," Christina squirmed, looking uncomfortable.  "I'm the one carrying him around twenty four seven.  Are you sure he's okay?"

"The baby is fine," the doctor reassured them.  "Only a few weeks to go, it won't be long now."

Back at home Christina was in the nursery rearranging the items and making sure Emmett had enough diapers and onesies.  She wanted everything perfect and ready for his arrival. 

When Robbie came home he found her rearranging the pictures on the wall while Sandy sat on the baby blue rug and watched.  "Geez, busy again?" he said.  "When I agreed that you should take some time off work I didn't mean that you should be on your feet at home.  You're supposed to be resting, not working."

"I want Emmett's room in order," Christina said as she sat down and refolded the baby's layette.  "Once he's here I'm not going to have time to run out and get anything."

"It's called online shopping," Robbie said.  "You know, that thing you do every other week."  He took the tiny shirt from her hands.  "Why don't we take a break and go to Five Guys for your usual bacon cheeseburger with everything?"

"How did you know I was craving that?" Christina smiled at her husband.  She loved how he stayed on top of her cravings.  He would even get up at three in the morning just to get her favorite ice cream and pickles.

"I know my wifey," Robbie said, giving her cheek a light pinch.  "Her needs are my needs, her wants are my wants."

Christina snorted.  "Is that right? Do you NEED to go pee too? Do you WANT to not carry eighty pounds in your uterus as well?"

"Okay, maybe not that." Robbie rolled his eyes as he left the room.  "But I am here to serve you."

"Sure, Robberella.  Take me to Five Guys now."

He stuck his head back in the door.  "The fuck did you just call me?"

After returning from the diner they spooned on the couch to binge watch Better Call Saul.  Suddenly Robbie felt some wetness coming from Christina's bottom.  

"Geez," he complained.  "What did you do, pee on yourself?" He nudged her playfully. "Too lazy to get up this time?"

Christina sat up.  "I didn't pee." She felt a weird pain in her back as well as the wetness.  There was a lot of fluid down there.  "I think my water just broke."

"Eww." Robbie said.  "So do you need some Depends or what?"

"No, dumbass," Christina said as she stood up.  "It means I'm going into labor now.  We need to go to the hospital."

Robbie jumped up.  "Uhh, what! Shit! Now? Now? Fuck! You're not due for two more weeks!"

"Tell that to the baby," Christina was getting her suitcase and coat.  "Get Sandy so we can drop her off at Kylie's.  And call the hospital, let them know we're on the way."

Robbie ran around, hair wild.  "Where are my keys!? Where's my phone!? Shit! Shit!

"Hey, genius!" Christina stood by the door with his keys and phone.  "Quit freaking out and let's go have this baby."

After dropping off Sandy they were driving down the highway when Christina realized the pains were getting much worse.  "Owww!"

"What's wrong, baby?" Robbie was behind the wheel.  "Another contraction?"

"Yeah," Christina groaned through another one.  "They're coming in too close together.  Oh no, I think this baby is trying to come out." She grabbed Robbie's arm.  "Pull over."

Robbie gripped the steering wheel.  "Are you kidding? We're trying to get to the hospital.  Pulling over is the last thing we want to do."

Christina squeezed his arm tighter as another contraction hit.  "This baby isn't going to wait til we get to the hospital.  He wants to get out right now."  Yet another contraction hit her.  "Oww!"

"Okay, okay."  Robbie took several deep breaths as he steered the car to the side of the road.  He turned to Christina.  "Okay, what do I do? I only saw this on TV and movies."

"I don't have a lot of experience in this either," Christina was trying to do her lamaze breathing.  It was helping to ease the pain a little.  "Just get out of the car and be ready to catch your kid when he comes out."

"I think I should call 911," Robbie said as he got out and helped Christina turn around.  "I think it's a good idea to let someone more qualified deliver the kid."

"Yeah, fine."

Robbie dialed 911.  "Hi, my wife is in labor, the baby is coming and we need help."

"Where is your location?" asked the dispatcher.

Robbie told her.  "How soon can you get here? My wife is ready to blow, she's ready to kick our kid out." Christina kicked him.  "Ow! She's also kinda evil so can you guys hurry up?"

Christina kicked him again.  "I'll give you evil."

"Sir, we are sending an ambulance your way," said the dispatcher.  "But we won't make it there in time to deliver.  You may have to deliver him yourself."

Robbie felt sick.  "You got to be kidding me."

"It's not that bad," the dispatcher said.  "I will stay on the line and help you."

Robbie looked at Christina.  She was leaning back in the front seat with her feet up, focusing on her lamaze breathing.  He propped her legs up and looked beneath her dress.  "Oh Jesus God!" He felt like puking.  "that is so gross."

"What?" Christina groaned through the pain.

"I can't do this," Robbie backed up.  "It's too gross, I can't."

"Sir," said the dispatcher.  "You have to."

"I can't!" Robbie was now in freak out mode.  "I can't!"

Christina waved him closer.  When he leaned over she grabbed him by the collar and pulled him until they were nose to nose.  "You listen to me, Robert Andrew Kay," she muttered like a mafia gangster.  "Thanks to you not putting a condom on that overactive dick of yours we are now in this situation. I am in extreme pain trying to push out this humongous child that you put in me because you didn't bother to wrap up your hyped up johnson.  If you don't man up and deliver your child, I swear to God Almighty I will get the largest knife I can find and I will personally slice off that well used dick.  Do you understand?"

Robbie nodded, too shocked to speak.  He lifted her dress and looked again.  "Oh Lord, I can see the head."

"Okay, Christina," the dispatcher said.  "You're fully dilated so you need to push on your next contraction."

When Christina felt that next contraction she pushed with all of her strength.  Robbie could see the baby's head.  He held his hands under the baby's head to help guide him out.  "He's almost here."

Christina gave another push.  The rest of the baby slid out into Robbie's hands.  

"He's here!" Robbie held him up.  "Look, Christina! Emmett's here.  He's perfect."

Christina sat up so she could see her new son.  He was tiny and covered in a lot of greasy stuff.  She couldn't believe it.  Their baby was here.  She held out her arms.  "Oh let me see."

Robbie wiped him off before handing Emmett over to Christina.  She held him close, feeling protective of him.  "Hi, Emmett. Hi, Emmett Andrew Kay. You are so beautiful."  Emmett whimpered and squirmed.  Robbie gave her one of the blankets from the baby bag and she wrapped her baby.  "I can't believe we made this baby."

Robbie looked at his new family.  "I can't either.  He's amazing, our boy."

The ambulance pulled up.  They put Christina and the baby on the gurney, then ushered the entire family inside and drove off.

Christina held onto Emmett the entire time.  She didn't want to let go of him except for when the doctor and nurses cleaned and examined him.  He weighed in at eight pounds ten ounces and was twenty two inches long.  The medical staff said he was perfectly healthy and that the delivery in the car didn't affect him at all.  She and the baby were just fine.

Later the new family were in a private room.  Christina was feeding the baby while Robbie watched.  They had never been so happy.

"I hope he's a player like me." Robbie joked.

Christina sighed.  If Emmett was anything like his father, she was going to have her hands plenty full.