Well hello hello, your nasty author here sksks, just few things I wanna say and we're done,

This book is created just so all of us can explore our flithy thoughts about jikook, ofc I'll be writing with my own mind but it open for my lovely folks to request their desired oneshots! Don't worry bc you're free to be as nasty as you want and none will judge you!

It's strictly bottom kook so please, don't request anything other, and apart from that you're free to choose whatever! Aus, genres, kinks, age gaps and whatever you feel like! I'll try my best to fulfill your lustful desire dw~ and now, let's get it!

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[You get me so high pt.1]

"C'mon now kook you can't be serious! Fighting over something so important and most of all, leaving that poor man heartbroken!? Tsk change yourself before you lose it" namjoon clicked his tongue done with jungkook's behavior at this point, the said younger just looked away "Whatever, his fault I don't care"

Namjoon sighed and shooked his head as he said it out loudly, "You know it actually makes me realize you're not worth his love at all."

Jungkook gulped at that but didn't respond as he kept walking wherever his legs took him.

Ever since jungkook found out jimin had feelings for him he became distant, as homophobic as it was jungkook didn't care he felt disgusted at the thought of being in a relationship with the same gender and even being intimate with a guy!

It makes jungkook's body react in a very uncomfortable way, jungkook was a model and an ambassador of multiple brand meanwhile jimin owned multiple brands from his own successful brands like angel and honey to brands like dior and bottega veneta,

so jungkook didn't wanted his career to get ruined because as he says, that if he gets kicked out of the agency then his life is done but jimin will be living with no regrets whatsoever!

"Stupid gays" jungkook mumbled under his breath and rolled his eyes in annoyance. He won't lie he misses jimin as they used to be close but he's strictly against any relationship with a man, "C'mon man all I wanted was a girlfriend! Not to be guilt tripped!"

He ruffled his hair and frowned when he saw himself standing infront of jimin's house, "Are you for real now?" He grumbled to himself and walked inside the gate.

"No no this is a good idea! I should probably return-"

"J-jimin how can you do that to me! We love each other baby c'mon don't be like that-" the girl's face was sideways from the slapped received by none other than jimin, jimin glared at her "Come and stalk me one time I'll make sure that will be the last day you see the world,"

Jimin clicked his fingers as guards came taking her away, jimin sighed and massaged his temples before his eyes met with jungkook's who was just staring at him with wide eyes.

Jimin didn't smiled how he'd used to whenever he saw jungkook, he had a poker face and simply closed the door as guards came towards him "Hello mr. jeon it's been awhile since you visited but mr. Park wants privacy at the moment so I need you to leave"

Jungkook blinked and nodded dumbly before walking out as his mind was filled with so many thoughts and the most important one was, how long has it been since he stopped talking with jimin?.....2 years and 6 months to be exact.

Jimin looked so cold so drained and so..exhausted. He looked like he hasn't been taking care of himself oh how jungkook wished he could be with-

Jungkook widened his eyes in realization and shooked his head "Oh god I must be going crazy just like him"

In all honesty, jungkook knew it was all fault from messing up with jimin to ending things horribly,

He remembers when jimin confessed him he was looking at jungkook with so much hope, jungkook could've been a good guy and reject him softly but no; he suddenly had a urge to be bitchy so he pushed jimin and...told him that he was disgusting, an animal and what not.

He remembers jimin still not minding it and taking care of jungkook when...jungkook took it too far, by that I mean way too far. He invited jimin in his birthday party and everything was going so well until he again gave jimin false hopes and made out with a girl right infront of his face.

He knows, he knows it all, he knows it's all his fault but..will he agree that he's the wrong one? Never.

"Master! Please hear us out! D-do not do that! Please!"

Jungkook looked over his shoulder as his eyes widened, jimin was standing at the rooftop as he looked up slightly smiling, jungkook couldn't think straight, he ran as fast as he could and fell down with a weight on top of him.

"Who the fuck-....you? How dare you" jimin growled at jungkook who snickered at him "I just saved your ass be grateful bitch-" his sentence got cut in the mid-way as he saw jimin looking at him like he could kill him.

"You better leave before you're six feet under, honey" jimin whispered smirking before getting up and slamming the door shut leaving a sobbing jungkook alone.

Jungkook got up and rolled his eyes even though it was clear that his eyes were getting glossy, "Whatever I just wanted to help him" deep down jungkook actually felt hurt for some very odd reason and he...he didn't liked how much jimin changed throughout.

'He's not bitcher than you' said his inner voice making him huff but surely he can't deny this one, he knows he's the meanest person out here but...was it entirely his fault? He was a child, he learned what people taught him, he did what he was told to do,

"Male and female are only valid"

"Men shouldn't date same gender because, it's a sin!"

"Men should always be masculine!"

"Makeup isn't for men"

"Men are not supposed to cry like girls"

And just so so many things he learned when was so young, so innocent, it corrupted his small mind and now, he became, a toxic successfull handsome masculine man but he never felt full, he knew something was missing so his only thought was to get a girlfriend.

Jungkook blinked and was out from his thoughts as droplets of rain fell on him, "Fuck fuck" he cursed and mentally slapped himself for not bringing his car, not long after it started raining and the huge door opened revealing a pissed off jimin.

"Come in within a second before I throw you out of my place"

Jungkook felt offended but nonetheless he got in and stood there awkwardly not wanting to do anything without further instruction, "Oh don't worry you don't need to be uncomfortable, I won't do anything to you" jimin said initiating he has nothing to do with him.

Jimin signal jungkook to come upstairs as he threw him some clothes on him, "Go take a bath I'm heating up some jajangmyeon for you, or...you want something else perhaps?" Jungkook felt warm for the fact that jimin still cared for him.

"Jimin-ssi...d-do you have any bag I can borrow? Um I-I need to take my close home so that I can-"

"Keep them here my maids will wash it, and have your food, you're not eating well for years" jimin simply said and walked pass jungkook, making his nostrils corrupt with a strong cologne but what caught his attention was jimin's arms which were filled with scars...?

Jungkook squinted his eyes before widening them in realization, he felt his chest tighten at the thought of jimin was harming himself 'Because of you' said his inner voice making him groan, without wasting more time he made a quick run towards jimin.

"Jimin wait!"

Jimin looked at him with dead eyes as jungkook stopped right infront of him, "Yes?" He said in a cold demeanor, jungkook fidgeted his fingers nervously as he knew he had no rights to point out on the scares but..something in him encouraged him that it's now or never.

"Did..did you harmed yourself?" Jungkook said pointing at his arms filled with deep wounds. Jimin frowned before chuckling "So?" Jimin simply said as if it was nothing making jungkook a bit angry "You know, only cowards do that"

And..that ticked jimin, he pushed him against the hallway wall and clenched his jaw "Jeon I'm telling you, you will not like my mad version" jungkook gulped as he again chose wrong words for jimin.

You see jungkook even being a famous model and ambassadors of multiple brands he was not good at social interaction, nor was he good with words. He was at the end of the day a very lonely and confused boy with no one there to help him, he would do what he think was right and bear the consequences.

"It's not about getting mad at me, why would you hurt yourself huh? Didn't you said you're the strongest? D-"

"You wanna know why? Fine, I'll tell you" jimin chuckled deeply before grabbing jungkook's jaw making him look at him in the eyes, "I loved you, even when you were bitchy towards me I would bawl my eyes out and gaslight myself into believing someday you'll love me back too, I tried and tried until..you humiliated my feelings and kissed a hoe infront of me to indicate that it's better to be with a cheap hoe than with me,

I was going insane, I burned my previous house hoping to die but I woke up after months only to see I was alive, so from that day I cut myself everyday hoping to not wake up the next day."

Jimin chuckled before letting go of jungkook's jaw and put his hands in his pockets making himself walk towards his room.

Jungkook stood there as tears started running down his face, at that moment he realized, he realized all of it. He is a horrible person, he hurted someone so precious, he deserves brutal death, he should remain unloved, he-

'You're not worth his love'

'Kill yourself'
'Kill yourself'
'Kill yourself'
'Kill yourself'
'Kill yourself'
'Kill yourself'
'Kill yourself'

Jungkook couldn't hold back anymore, he sat on the floor and covered his ears in hopes that the voice will stop, his forehead kissed the floor as puddle of tears fell on the floor, his head banged as he tightly closed his eyes shut. "N-not again" he stuttered,

No this was not new for him, he might show everyone he was a total bitch but he would have episodes like this whenever his mind would travel to the moment where he horribly rejected jimin, he would drown in guilt and his inner voice would get loud. Now that he learned what more of damage he did he again lost control and unfortunately enough he wouldn't be able the calm down unless..he pass out.

He heard soft footsteps walking towards him as he assumed jimin would just walk pass him but what he didn't expected was the sudden warm embrace. Jungkook was shaking badly so he wrapped his arms around jimin's neck and clutched on him tightly  "J-jimin.." he said as jimin rubbed circles on his back.

"Shh it'll be over soon," he spoke lowly against his neck, lips slightly brushing over his sensitive neck making jungkook oddly calm down a bit.

Jimin fully sat on the floor making jungkook have the opportunity to crawl on his lap and wrap his legs around his waist."Jimin m-make the headache g-go away!" Sobbed jungkook, jimin slightly widened his eyes before he whispered "You would be uncomfortable jeon-"

"N-no no! Do whatever and don't call m-me jeon, call me by my name please..," jungkook spoke whatever came in his mind making jimin surprised as he gulped "You sure..?"

Jungkook felt rejected as he lowered his head and hugged him even tighter, he slowly dipped in his neck and softly prepped it with light kisses he felt jungkook finally stop shaking as he gently let his hands travel underneath the long hoodie and caress his bare waist.

Jungkook felt so loved yet so guilty that even after so much pain he cares for him and l- no maybe not love, I mean who will love one person who caused so much damage? None.

"Finally you calmed down and..I apologize for kissing you neck though don't worry no marks are there" jimin was about to get up when jungkook pouted unconsciously and put his face in the crook of his neck, "D-don't leave me alone..please"

Jimin frowned and moved away "Are you jungkook? And..if you are, are you sure you're not on some bad drugs? Should I call up my doctor? Or make an appointment for you tomorrow-"

Jungkook shooked his head and looked down, "No jimin I...I can't say sorry and expect you to accept the apology neither am I good with words but..I wanted you to know, you're an absolute amazing guy, you're what everyone calls the dream guy you're beautiful, charming, caring, loving, sweet, humble and just so many words to describe you. It seems or rather is pathetic that I realized my horrible deeds a moment before my episode but after all the realization, I know I don't deserve your love, so find someone better who will love you as much as you do, and..I can't go on saying I love you but,

Park jimin, I adore you"

Jungkook finished his explanation with whatever good or average words he could come up with, "Thank you for taking care of me throughly even after my bitchy behavior, I'm going but I hope you find someone who will take care of you aswell, I'll probably won't be back but just know I appreciate everything you've done for me till now, and most importantly..thank you for loving me jimin hyung."

Jungkook smiled with glossy eyes and bowed at him "You're the perfect partner one could ever have," he turned his back and started walking when he felt a pair of strong arms around his waist.

"Where do you think you're going huh?" Jimin said with a soft voice, jungkook exhaled shakily chanting himself to not cry."I'm going somewhere I can't tell you but all I can say is I won't hurt you anymore, I know what I had done is done but I promise to heal you someday if I return, for now I-I need to go" jungkook made it short as he knew the second he'll be out of the place he'll cry himself to sleep.

He gasped when jimin slammed his back against the wall angrily, "Selfish," jungkook's breath shortened, "S-selfish? I..I know hyung but I'm sorry, so sorry-"

Jimin hugged him tightly and put his face in the crook of his neck as jungkook felt the hoodie getting wet, "How selfish of you to sugarcoat me and assume that I can ever love someone other than you,

Oh how rude of you think my feelings are that easy, but..you realized your mistake, yes I won't forgive you as if it wasn't anything but I will slowly, you don't need to love me kook just allow me to be friends with you as we were but the better version, do I have the permission jeon?"

Jimin said slowly with his raspy voice against jungkook's ear shell making him blush as he nodded, "Words,"

"Y-yes you do, hyung"

Jimin smiled at him and pecked his neck "Haha you surely changed a lot bun" jungkook couldn't keep his giggle to himself as he laughed out "Yes because who wouldn't? You're Park jimin after all," jungkook chuckled as jimin finally looked up at him, their noses touching as he said "Oh, is it so jeon?"

Jungkook scoffed "Stop calling me that!" Jimin let out a throaty laugh which jungkook oddly found attractive "Aish you're cute no wonder I fell for you though," jimin said pinching his cheek softly making him flustered,

Jungkook looked at jimin as he finally realized that jimin was half naked the whole time, 'so when his face was inside my-' jungkook felt heat rushing up his cheeks as he looked down "What happened? Ah sorry for that joke-"

Jungkook looked up at him and shooked his head "No no it isn't that! It's.." jungkook lowered his head blushing furiously as jimin chuckled what he meant by, "We both are men don't worry" jungkook pouted and jimin ruffled his hair.

"Your food is cold right now so let's go to my room we can spend our time there and let me order some food," jungkook smiled at him and wrapped his hands around jimin's arm putting it close to his chest, "Let's go,"

Jimin gulped when he felt his arm in contact with something puffy and soft, "Yeah l-let's go."

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So...how was it? Lol dw it's just the first part, second part will be coming by this week so get your panties check while you can~ hehe and first things first I have a HUGE kook chest kink so- iykyk 😀🤏

Anyways no more secrets revealing sksks and hope you enjoyed his chapter! You're free to request anything as mentioned, and have a nice day folks!