Song: At My Worst- Pink Sweat$

Stranger

Before my shift ends, my co-interns asked me to meet them at our locker room because we're going to have a "meeting". Sakto at doon din naman ang tungo ko pagkatapos kong tapusin ang paper work ng isang pasyente.

I was walking along the corridor of the pediatric ward when I heard some shouting. My forehead creased and looked around to see where it's coming from. Kahit ang mga nurse ay nabobother na din sa nagiging sigawan.

Sumungaw ako sa iilang kwarto hanggang sa mapagtanto ko na sa kwarto pala ni Aya nanggagaling ang sigawan.

"You no longer need to tell me because I can decide for my sister!" Archer shouted.

"But I am his father! I have the right-"

"But were you really a father to her? Aya has been confined here for a week now at ngayon mo lang naisipan bumisita? What's more important than your fucking work, Dad?!"

"Archer, hindi ko na nagugustohan ang pananalita mo! Sumasagot ka nang ganyan habang kaharap si Aya! Ganyan ba ang gusto mong ituro sakanya ha?"

"I wouldn't be acting this way if you were just here with her during the days we've been convincing you to come! But you still didn't! You are repeating what you did to Mom and I can't fucking it let happen again!"

I gasp. What the hell is happening? Ang iba ay nag-iiwas nalang ng tingin, sinusubukan na huwag nang makiusosyo pa sa ano mang nangyayari. Some nurses even tried their best not to look into their direction. Umaaktong wala nalang nakakakita.

"Kanina pa ho 'yan, Doc." Ani isang nurse. Agad akong napabaling ng tingin sakanya.

"H-How's the patient? I don't think it's good for her to be exposed in front of this feud. She might get stressed out."

Nagpakawala ng malalim na hininga ang nurse.

"'Yun na nga, Doc, e. May sumubok na pong patigilin sila kanina dahil nakakahiya rin po sa ibang pasyente pero... masyado silang mainit sa isa't isa, e."

Kumunot ang noo ko. This has been going on for a while and they're still at it? Sinilip ko ang kondisyon ni Aya at nakitang yakap siya ng kanyang ina. I couldn't see her face clearly but I can sense that she's crying.

Sinubukan kong humakbang pero agad ko rin namang pinigilan ang sarili. It's not my place to meddle with this but the nurse is right. There are other patients in this ward. This is the most unlikely place to have this kind of argument.

Hahakbang na sana akong muli nang matigilan na naman nang biglang lumabas si Archer mula sa kwarto ni Aya. Agad siyang napabaling ng tingin sa akin. I opened my mouth to say something but I feel like, at that moment, I lost my capacity to speak.

Tamad siyang nag-iwas ng tingin sa akin. He looks straight and scanned the hallway before he sighed.

"I'm sorry you have to hear all that."

'Yun lang ang natatanggi niyang sinabi bago siya tuluyang umalis. I glanced at Aya's room again and saw that her father trying to console her now. I sighed heavily and closed my eyes.

What a way to end my shift for today!

Kumpleto na ang mga co-interns ko nang dumating ako sa locker room. Lahat sila ay napabaling ng tingin sa akin nang pumasok ako.

"What took you so long? Kanina pa kami dito!" sabi ni Carmela.

"Sorry. Something just came up but it's settled now. Anong meron?" sabi ko at dumiretso na sa sariling locker.

I opened it and took all my things out. I sat next to Carmela while I remove the stethoscope around my neck. Si Yen naman nakatayo sa harap namin, nagsisimula nang ipaalam sa amin ang rason kung bakit niya kami gustong magtipon dito.

"Naisip ko lang... since it's been a week since our PGI-ship started, I think we should all go out and celebrate! Hindi rin naging biro 'tong linggo na 'to kaya deserve talaga natin ang mag-unwind!"

Agad namang napangiti itong si Carmela sa suggestion ni Yen. Sa sobrang tuwa niya, siya pa itong unang sumangayon sakanya. Si Alex, nakasandal lang sa isang locker habang nakahalukipkip at tahimik na nakikinig.

"True! Maluwag-luwag pa ang schedule ngayon dahil first week palang pero siguro sa mga susunod na buwan, mawawalan na tayo ng oras magpahinga kaya let's take this opportunity to celebrate!" panghihikayat ni Carmela.

She bumped me using her shoulder. Tinanguan niya ako para kumbinsihin na pumayag na rin. Inalis ko ang pagkakatali ng buhok at tamad lang na tumango sakanya. I couldn't say no to her.

"Felicity and I are in! Saan ba?"

"Hahanap palang kami ng club. Kami na ang bahalang magpa-reserve ng table. We'll just send you the details once we've settled everything."

"I know someone who owns a bar. I could easily reserve us a table since I'm friends with the owner." Alex suggested.

"Nice!" si Tim, ang isa pa naming co-intern. "It's settled then!"

"Yay! I'm so excited!" Carmela clapped both of her hands. "Thanks, Alex. You've been a really great help. Pinadali mo ang trabaho namin."

Alex smirked. I glanced at Carmela to see her smirking back at him. The side of my lips rose. I rolled my eyes at the both of them.

Tumayo ako upang hubarin na ang scrubs na suot ko. It's not a big deal to change here since everyone's already been exposed to different parts of a human body.

At isa pa, walang malisya sa medisina.

Carmela had to leave first because she has some important things to do at home. Nakipagbeso siya sa akin bago siya kumaway at lumabas na ng locker room.

Habang ako naman ay inaayos pa ang ibang gamit. I put my books and notebooks inside my bag. I also checked my notepad to see if I forgot to write some things that I've learned today. Kung may nakalimutan man, mamaya ko na siguro aalalahanin.

"Una na ko, Fel." Sabi ni Tim. He waved at me before leaving the locker room.

Ako nalang ang natira sa aming lima. May mga ibang interns na rin dito pero sila iyong sa night shift. I smiled at some of them when they greeted me.

Nang matapos akong mag-ligpit, agad akong tumayo at lumabas na ng locker room. Saktong paglabas ko ay nakita kong palabas din si Lucas mula sa locker room nilang mga residents. I instantly smiled and tried to walk towards him when I noticed who exited the room after him.

Agad akong natigilan. It was Demi. I pursed my lips and just watched the both of them walk towards the hospital's exit.

May kung ano silang pinag-uusapan habang naglalakad at napansin ko ring masayang tumatawa itong si Lucas habang kausap si Demi. Lucas opened the door for Demi like a gentleman and let her exit first.

I sighed. Ganyan rin naman siya sa akin sa tuwing papasok kami sa kwarto ng mga pasyente namin, lagi niya rin akong pinagbubuksan ng pinto at pinapaunang pumasok. Pero ni minsan hindi ko siya nakitang ngumiti ng ganyan kalaki sa akin.

Every time he'll smile at me, palaging tipid at palakaibigan lang. Unlike when he's with Demi, you can really notice the adoration he has towards her.

Was it really that hard to see something in me that would make him like me back? May kulang ba sa akin? Am I too much? Am I annoying him? Ano pa ba ang kailangan kong gawin para magawa niya namang masuklian ang nararamdaman ko para sakanya?

I know it's not my place to demand. Hindi ko naman pupwedeng sabihin sakanya na gusto ko siya kaya kailangan gustohin niya rin ako pabalik. I know he doesn't love me like the way I do, but I still continued to adore him anyway despite that heartbreaking fact.

Just the thought that he won't ever get himself to like me is already enough to send thorns inside my heart.

Nawala lang ang tingin ko sakanya nang may biglang nagsalita sa likuran ko. Agad akong lumingon at nakita sila Ate Margaux at Ate Brittany kasama ang grupo nila.

Seriously? Are they always together? Hindi ba sila naghihiwalay kahit na may kani-kaniya silang pasyente?

"Oh? Felicity! Going home now?" tanong ni Kuya Rico. Tumango ako.

"Yeah. Shift just ended."

Tinaasan naman ako ni Ate Margaux ng kilay. "Sino 'yung kanina mo pa tinitingnan diyan kanina?"

Suminghap ako. I tried to come up with an excuse pero naunahan na agad ako ni Kuya Rico magsalita.

"Sino pa ba? Baka si Dr. Kim na naman 'yan." Aniya sabay kindat sa akin.

Sinubukan kong i-deny iyon pero nagsalita rin naman agad si Kuya Ethan.

"Aww! Felicity is so whipped for that guy! Gusto mo tulungan ka naming ilakad sa kanya? We're his seniors. I'm sure he's going to follow whatever we say."

Iiling na sana ako nang magsalita naman si Ate Margaux ngayon. I couldn't even defend myself dahil sunod-sunod silang nagsasalita.

"What are you going to ask him to do then?"

"Let's give Felicity a lot of paper works then let's ask Lucas to help her! Nagtatrabaho na kayo, nagkaroon pa kayo ng alone time together! That's what you call responsible love!" Kuya Rico suggested happily.

"Oo nga! Doon kami nagkadevelopan ni Erin! I always ask her to be my scrub nurse on every surgery. And look at us now!" sabi naman ni Kuya Ethan at tsaka ipinakita ang suot na singsing.

He even wiggled his brows as if he's suggesting that this could happen to Lucas and I if I let them do their plan.

"Yabang!" singhap ni Ate Margaux. "Tutal proud na proud kang kasal na kayo ni Erin, patunayan mo na sa aming 'di ka impotent."

Humalakhak ng malakas ang tatlo habang nanlaki naman ang mata ni Kuya Ethan dahil sa sinabi niya. I laughed along with them.

"What the hell, Margaux?! 'Di ka parin tapos diyan? It's been what?! God knows how many years have passed since you brought up that freaking topic!"

"'Di ako maka-move on, e. Bakit ba?!"

The group now started mocking each other. Napailing nalang ako habang pinapanood sila. This group is really inseparable. 'Di na talaga nakakapagtaka kung bakit madalas ko silang nakikitang magkakasama dito sa ospital.

"Anyway, wala bang girlfriend 'yong si Dr. Kim? I always see him together with one of our OB residents." Sabi ni Ate Brittany.

Siniko siya ni Ate Margaux dahilan kung bakit galit niyang nilingon ang pinsan namin. Ate Margaux used her lips to point at me.

"Ikaw naman, pinagseselos mo pa ang kapatid ko!"

"Anong pinagseselos? Anong gusto mong gawin natin sa babaeng 'yon, Fel, ha? I'm her senior! I can do something!" nanlalaki pa ang mga mata ni Ate Brittany habang sinasabi niya iyon.

"See, Fel? We are so supportive of you nag-join forces na kami para sa'yo!" biro ni Kuya Rico.

I smiled at them.

"I really appreciate all your suggestions but..." agad na nag-iba ang itsura nila nang marinig ang sinabi ko. "I don't think you should be doing that. I want to be with him. I really do. But I also want him to be with me because he wants to and not because... someone asked him to."

Bumuka ang mga bibig nila at inayos ang mga postura. Kuya Rico cleared his throat while Kuya Ethan ran his hand through his mouth. Si Ate Margaux at Ate Brittany naman ay nagsisikuhan na ngayon.

"But thank you! Ibig sabihin lang no'n botong-boto kayo kay Lucas para sa akin." I chuckled.

Natahimik sila ng sandali. Nagpalinga-linga si Ate Margaux bago magpatuloy.

"Sino ba kasi ang nag-suggest?!" halos pasigaw niyang sinabi.

Sabay na tinuro ng dalawa si Kuya Rico na agad namang nabigla sa ginawa nila. Napaturo din tuloy siya sa kanyang sarili habang nagugulohan silang tiningnan.

"Ako!? O, bakit may sumbatan agad? Nag magandang loob lang naman ako." He pouted.

May kung anu-ano pang sinabi si Kuya Ethan at Ate Margaux sa kanya. Si Ate Brittany naman ay nagpakawala nalang ng malalim na hininga at hinarap akong muli.

"But Fel is right. We shouldn't be meddling with this. She is not a child anymore. She can already decide on her own. Let's just let her do whatever she wants. We'll support you in everything, you know that, right?" Aniya sabay ngiti sa akin.

I smiled back at her and nod my head.

Isa rin ang bagay na iyan sa nireklamo ko sakanila noon. Dahil ako ang pinaka-bata sa aming magpipinsan, there will always be a time where they will still treat me like a child! I mean... I'm already grown up! I can already decide for myself!

My brothers, especially Kuya Dominic, like to meddle with my life! They're a bit overprotective when it comes to me. 'Di ko na nga rin alam minsan kung nakikiusosyo lang ba siya dahil curious siya o baka dahil gusto niya lang na may maiasar sa akin?

Nagpaalam din naman ang grupo nila Ate Margaux sa akin pagkatapos noon. They're still not going home since may ipapakita pa raw si Kuya Rico sakanila sa opisina niya. They asked me to come but I refused because I already wanted to go home.

Agad naman akong dumiretso sa parking at pinatunong ang sasakyan ko nang matanaw ko iyon. I'm trying to get used to driving alone now. Pabalik na rin kasi si Kuya Dominic at Serena sa New York next week kaya wala na akong magagambala. Nang dahil doon, napagdesisyonan kong sanayin na ang sarili na magmaneho mag-isa.

I opened the back seat and threw my bag inside. I closed the door and moved towards the driver's seat. Hindi ko pa nabubuksan ang pinto ay agad kong natanaw si Archer na nakasandal sa isang sasakyan na nakapark sa malapit.

Diretso lang ang tingin niya at mukhang malalim ang iniisip. Umangat ang kilay ko nang makita ko siyang humihithit ng sigarilyo. Pagkatapos niyang ibuga ang usok ay nagpakawala siya ng malalim na hininga.

What happened a while ago must've been so frustrating to him that it drove him to smoke. Kita ko naman sa itsura niya ngayon. He is staring blankly at nothing. Kaya naman nagulat ako nang bigla siyang mapalingon sa gawi ko.

Mukhang nabigla rin siya nang makita ako kaya agad niyang binitawan ang sigarilyong hawak at inapakan iyon. My mouth parted and frantically opened the door. Agad akong pumasok sa loob at binuhay na ang sasakyan.

I drove away the parking lot as fast as I could. Baka isipin no'n na kanina ko pa siya tinitingnan habang may alone time siya doon!

I wasn't! Sadyang nasaktohan ko lang siya doon!

My family just finished preparing for dinner when I got home. Agad akong dinaluhan ng kasambahay upang kunin ang bag ko sa akin. I smiled at her and went straight to our dining area.

Agad na sumilay ang ngiti sa labi ni Mommy nang matanaw ako. I went to her and kissed her cheek. Agad niyang nilapag ang dalang pagkain sa lamesa.

"Sakto ang dating mo, Fel." Aniya.

Dumiretso naman ako sa kabisera upang batiin si Daddy. He hugged me and asked how my day was. I answered his question as I move to my place.

"Sila Kuya Dom po at Serena?" tanong ko sa mga magulang ko.

"Ah, nasa kwarto pa ni Dom. Masama daw ang pakiramdam ni Serena kanina, e. Pero pinatawag ko na rin sila kanina. I'm sure they'll go down any moment by now."

Tumango ako. I scanned my eyes around the table. It's just the 5 of us eating here pero parang may handaan na sa dami ng pinahanda ni Mommy. Sabagay, minsan nalang din kasi nandito si Kuya Dom at Serena kaya marami rin siyang palaging pinapahanda.

Mamaya-maya pa ay bumaba na rin si Kuya Dom at Serena. My brother is carefully guiding his wife towards the dining area. Serena looked pale.

"Are you okay?" I asked worriedly. "'Di ka na sana bumaba. Pupwede naman naming ihatid ang pagkain sa kwarto niyo."

"Hindi na, Fel. Okay lang naman ako." She replied.

"She keeps on insisting. Gustong sumabay kumain kahit na hinang-hina dahil ilang beses nang nagsusuka." Singhal ni Kuya Dom. Naupo naman siya sa tabi nito.

Serena glared and rolled her eyes at my brother. Nang lingunin niya ako ay ngintian niya lang ako.

"You should have yourself checked, Serena. Baka kung ano na 'yan." Sabi ni Daddy.

Sumangayon naman si Mommy kay Daddy habang nilalagyan niya ng pagkain ang plato nito. My father mumbled a thank you after she finished.

"Your father is right. Dominic also told me that you once vomited during one of your shoots. It must be something, Serena..."

Serena bit her lip. Tipid siyang ngumiti at tumango sakanila Mommy at Daddy.

She vomited during one her shoots? Tapos nagsusuka ulit siya ngayon? Naningkit ang mga mata ko. Hindi kaya...

I glanced meaningfully at my brother who happens to be looking at me now. Mukhang naghihintay na may mag-confirm ng hinala niya.

"I plan to bring her tomorrow to Brittany." Aniya sabay inilubay ang tingin sa akin upang bumaling sa asawa.

Serena's eyes immediately widened. "Kay Brittany agad?!"

"Bakit? Kanino mo gusto?"

At mukhang mag-aaway pa nga silang dalawa sa harap ng pagkain. While Serena keeps on insisting that it must only be an ordinary sickness, Kuya Dominic keeps on insisting that there's something.

"Did you do anything recently?" kuryosong tanong ni Mommy.

"We do it everyday." Agad na sagot ni Kuya Dom. My eyes widened.

Whoa! Sa harap talaga ng pagkain!

"Then maybe you're pregnant, Serena. Ganyan din si Margaux nung 'di pa namin alam na buntis siya kay George. She also thought that it was just an ordinary sickness until we managed to convince her to take a pregnancy test."

"Gusto mo ipagbili ka na namin agad ngayon?" tanong ni Daddy.

I smirked and ate my own food quietly as I listen to them. Ganito talaga si Daddy tuwing mababalitaan niyang may buntis. Gusto niya kasi ng maraming apo kaya sa tuwing mababalitaan niya na maaring buntis si Ate o 'di kaya isa man sa mga asawa ng mga Kuya ko, siya talaga ang pinaka excited.

Napasinghap si Serena at 'di agad nakahanap ng sasabihin. I know they are trying to have a baby for quite some time now so it must be really shocking to her.

At sigurado din akong excited na itong si Kuya Dominic!

"I'll call her mother to join us tomorrow." Kuya Dominic said.

"Sasama kami ng Mama mo."

Tumango si Kuya Dominic at tinulungan na si Serena sa kanyang pagkain. She whispered something to him. Umiling siya at may kung anong sinabi para pagaaanin ang loob ng asawa.

I smiled again.

"Ikaw, Fel? Got any plans tomorrow?" kuryosong tanong ni Kuya Dom.

"Uh, yeah. My co-interns and I are planning to party tomorrow night. Celebration na din daw as our first week of being an intern."

"Sus! Party! Kapag ganyan, kami dapat palagi ang kasama mo, e."

When I said that he likes to meddle with my life, I wasn't kidding. Look at him now!

Kinunotan ko siya ng noo.

"Bakit? Maayos naman akong nakakauwi sa tuwing mga kaibigan ko ang kasama kong lumabas ah?"

He sneered and shake his head. "Hindi ka inaasikaso ng mga kaibigan mo tuwing lasing ka dahil pare-parehas kayo! Remember when you partied with your friends when you're still in college?"

"What party? I've been to a lot of parties when I was in college."

"The one where the owner―who happens to be a good friend―had to call me asking me to pick you and your friends up because you're all wasted?!"

Nabitin ang sasabihin ko sa ere dahil naalala ko nga ang araw na iyon. Si Mommy natawa nalang sa tabi ko dahil isa rin siya sa naperwisyo sa amin nang oras na 'yon.

"Well, we had so much fun kaya gano'n." I said and shrugged my shoulders. 

"Tss. You and your friends can't control yourselves when you're out. Kaya nga ilang beses din kitang pinapaalalahanan na subukan mong kontrolin ang sarili mo diba? Kaya tamo, kapag kami ang kasama mo, hindi ka nalalasing!"

May halong panunutya ko siyang tiningnan at inirapan. Oo na! Sige na! Tama na siya!

"Oh! And remember that one time where a stranger brought you home?" dagdag niya.

Nabigla naman ako dahil wala akong maalalang gano'n. Agad na kumunot ang noo ko at nagugulohan siyang tiningnan.

"Imagine, Fel, a stranger! Mabuti nalang at mabait ang kung sino man iyon at naiuwi ka nang maayos. Pakiramdam namin ni Kuya Gio 20 years ang itinanda namin nang araw na iyon! We were so stressed out!"

"I don't remember such thing."

He glared at me. "Of course. You were damn wasted. Took you days to recover from your hangover, right?"

Bumuka ang bibig ko nang maalala ko ang pinakamatinding hangover na naranasan ko. Was it during that day? Pero hindi ko maalala iyong tinutukoy ni Kuya Dom. All I can remember that night is that my friends and I had too much drink. Memories after that moment has completely vanished.

"Hindi ba si Carmela ang nag-uwi sa akin no'n?" tanong ko.

Agad na umiling si Kuya Dom.

"Hell no! I told you a stranger! A stranger, Fel! I haven't seen or met him anywhere before. I can't believe you can't remember that!" He said frustratingly.

I only shrugged my shoulders because I really can't remember what he's talking about.