Shawnie's POV

I watch as Aubrey leaves the table then I turn to Jasmine.

"It's not what you think. I'm trying to piss him off and Chris is helping me."

"What?" She says

"Yeah. Everything that was said is true but like I told you earlier, we're getting a divorce. I don't wanna work things out with him even though he's hell-bent on doing that. He's trying to make this a get back together vacation and also get them on the right track but I'm more so trying to get them on good terms. My mind is made up and he seems to think he can change it. I've been telling him for months that this is what I wanted and he does not accept that. So what other way to piss him off is to include Chris. Chris and I are not having sex. We ended things a long time ago."

"You could've told me." She says to Chris.

"I could've but your organic reaction to everything just made everything more believable." He says

"This is going to cause more friction between you guys." She says referring to Aubrey and Chris.

"If he would just let me separate the two situations, we can get some progress done but he keeps bringing up mine and Chris' relationship." I say. "Chris, why don't you pull him to the side and talk to him separately. That way Jasmine and I can talk."

"Aight. I'll go find him now." Chris gets up and he leaves Jasmine and I at the table.

I look at her. Now shit is awkward. I don't mind having to talk to her, I just have a fear of the unknown. This can possibly go all the way left and it is just her and I here. I look over at Joe and I see he is focused on me. I smiled and he cracked a small smile back at me and I turned back to Jasmine.

"Okay. So let's get the complicated part out of the way. This might come off completely wrong but please know I'm working on my delivery. I know I can come off insensitive, or nonchalant sometimes. I don't want you to think I'm being a bitch, I mean well and I only want to be open and honest with you. So I'm sorry ahead of time if you feel any negativity coming from me. I don't mean it in that way."

"I appreciate that. I'll keep that in mind." She says.

"So, Chris and I are cool, we're not continuously having sex with each other. We had sex a few days before my birthday and before then, it had been months. I don't want you to think that. I know he's talking to you and honestly I'm the reason why he is still talking to you. I don't mean for that to come off in a bitchy way but he was very much trying to keep our situation going and eventually get back together but I told him I was married and that I wanted to work my issues out with my husband. I also told him that I think it would be good if he tried to move on and make something work with you."

"Yeah, he told me that." He says

"Good. It's the truth. At the time I was really trying to work my marriage out but I'm at the point now where I'm tired of continuously saying what issues need to be addressed or fixed and they don't get addressed or fixed. So yes, I am at the point where divorce is definitely in the works. That doesn't mean I'm gonna go back to Chris, but you do have to realize and understand that I will always be around. We're friends, we're actually really good friends and he is one of my closest friend. We are pretty set in our ways when it comes to coparenting and I think that is what everyone is confused about. We put our daughter first. We're both always gonna make sure she's taken care of before anything."

"I understand." She says

"I just don't want you to feel jealous because you think that he's gonna be off cheating on you with me. He's not."

"Okay." Is all she says.

"I need to know if we're clear for real because I do have some things I would like to discuss with you and I don't know if you're gonna be able to take it and not get offended."

"Yeah, I can. What?"

"I'm telling you this as a woman. I don't want you to think there is anything malicious behind this, but I'm kind of looking out for you. I don't want you to think that I don't like you, it's just the situation. I want him to be happy and I want him to find exactly what he's been looking for. But I also think what he's looking for is a little bit unrealistic. I know how this may come off. Please don't take this the wrong way. I swear this is coming from a genuine place." I say honestly.

"You're good. Continue." She says

"I guess I was the closest thing to that but it's still unknown what exactly he wants. Chris is very emotional and he wants to be loved, he wants to be loved hard. I don't think those things are an issue, it's just that he's a little hard to please... " I say. "....or maybe it was me. Maybe I'm just not able to please him. I don't know."

"What do you mean?"

"Chris is a changed person, I don't doubt that. I see the change and I'm sure a lot of people do as well. I think he has been living this way for so long that he's just used to getting everything that he wants. I don't think I was the first person to tell him no but I think no coming from me was more hurtful for him. I really don't know how exactly to explain this, but, I know you met him when I was pregnant. Our relationship was very good at the time. Everything was perfect between us. We had seemingly gotten over what was going on with Aubrey. I hadn't spoken to Aubrey in I don't know how long. He wasn't calling me or texting. He was literally nonexistent at that point. He went to rehab, I supported him throughout that time, he came home and we went on tour together. Shortly after that, I had Genesis. There was nothing going on negatively in our relationship at all. We had problems but at that time, we were great. I'm just making it a point that it seems like it doesn't matter how good things are with your relationship, he's gonna find a way to self sabotage."

"I understand. Yeah he's changed. He's changed from the man I first met. I understand everything you're saying and I get it. He's closed off. He's making all of these changes to better himself and he's doing great but he's still closed off. I get a lot of pushback with small things." She takes a deep breath and exhales. "I only want to try to make his life easier. I'm sorry that I met him when you guys were together and I'm sorry that I'm still around. That was poor judgment on my part. But the only reason I'm still around is because I'm not someone who was constantly around him. It wasn't a meet up and fuck thing. It wasn't feelings involved, it was nothing like that when we met. It really wasn't until I moved here that we actually had constant communication. I think the break up hurt him more than anything. I think he thought he would never lose you. I never tried to make him get over you. I let him sit with his feelings and do whatever he needed to do, I'm still doing that. He's trying to work through him feelings, and I'm okay with that. I just have run into a brick wall." She says

"Most of that is new information to me. I just thought that you were another one. The end of our relationship did damage to me as well. But I had to leave. If Aubrey wasn't there to take my mind off of it, then I probably would be in a worse situation than he is. My way of dealing with the situation was not the way I should've gone about it at all, but I have to deal with that on my own. So we're here. I've had conversations with Chris and he's told me that he only wants to give me his loyalty and his love and to be honest with you, I'm not sure that he can fully commit. He has it in him but I think it's just the temporary fixes her needs to work on. I don't want you, or any woman, to go through what I went through or what I'm going through. I left him and I've never really experienced heartbreak like I did with Chris. There's a lot to deal with when it comes to him, and I just want to fix him."

"I know what you mean." She says. "Lots of baggage."

"During the relationship, I've always kind of had it in the back of my mind that I would have to leave him eventually. I tried to make it work with him, but in the end, I just couldn't. In the beginning, I always had my foot out the door, and when I got comfortable is when things got better but with me being completely vulnerable, I was opened up to a lot of things and I learned a lot about myself. But Chris is a good person and he is worth loving. I just don't think I could provide the type of happiness that he was looking for. Maybe you can." I say

"That's very big of you to say. A lot of people will just sit in a relationship when they know it's not going in the right direction." She says

"That was me, it's been me a couple of times..." I say honestly. "You seem like a very sweet person, and someone who genuinely cares about him. I want him to be happy because he deserves it."

"I agree." She says

"Chris made me feel like your relationship was very casual and nothing for me to really worry about. After talking to you, I see there's more to the situation and I'm okay with that. I'm not worried but I do see why you would want to meet me. It's still a little early for me but I do think it is okay for you to be around Genesis, but give me a little bit more time."

"Yeah, after everything has played out, I think I wanna wait a bit longer as well. Me meeting his daughter is a big step for us and I'm starting to see that we might not be there just yet." She says

"Take your time." I say. "And don't worry about what I said about the threesome thing I was only joking."

"No you weren't." She laughs. "Tell me."

"Maybe he's just doing things differently with you. I don't wanna mess that up."

"Listen, if we're gonna be sister wives, we need to learn how to communicate." She says and we both laughed. I know she's joking.

"Maybe you two just don't have the sexual relationship that we had, or you're taking it slow, I don't know. I don't want to know, but he likes all of that stuff. He's into some pretty crazy, freaky shit. I don't know why he didn't tell you."

"And maybe it's a comfort thing. Maybe he's not as comfortable with me as he was with you. I don't know either." She says, "I can say we've been taking things a little slow, but then again, we haven't. Like I said earlier, I've run into a brick wall. He only opens up to me a little bit, but then he closes the door back once he sees it he's letting me in. It makes sense that he's not giving me what he gave you. You were a lot of things to him that I'm not right now. So it's understandable.." she says

"Well, I do know once you get to that point if you're not down to do whatever he's asking you to do it's not gonna work. I'm not that kind of girl, let me rephrase that, I wasn't that type of girl. I had never been with another woman before I met Chris and when he asked me for whatever reason, I said yes. At the time I would do whatever to make him happy, but when he brought the girl in, I was so nervous. And I didn't know if it was a bitch that he had been with before but she was cool as hell. The experience overall was very good and I love it now. I haven't done anything like that since Chris but yeah, a lot of people don't know some of the shit that I've done with him, for him and to him. I did a whole lot more than I let on. Shit that I don't even want to admit, but that was something that was in our relationship. I didn't share it with anyone because it was between us. And now that you're in the situation, it's up to you to do what you wanna do." I say

"That gives me something to think about when we get to that point. You are so cool. I'm happy we could do this. And if you are sure you guys are done and over with, I wouldn't mind holding conversations like this again." She says

I laugh. "Anytime. I think Chris really wants us to get along because I do feel that he likes you and he does want to try to make things work with you. But for whatever reason I'm the most important one, but will you have two other women to worry about."

"Yeah, the other two baby mamas." She says

"Diamond is cool. I actually like her a lot. I don't think you're gonna have any issues with her. She wants to make things work as well. But the other one, I think she is really hurt that he left her when she was just trying to be with him. I think she liked him a lot and at one point I'm sure he did too, but it just wasn't enough to make him stay with her. He said she was just somebody that he was messing with when him and Karrueche broke up. She got pregnant, but she didn't know that he was talking to me at the time. So when he actually did cut her off, he didn't know she was pregnant. Like I said, I think she's just hurt and that makes you do a lot of crazy shit." I explain

"Well, I'm down to talk to her." She says

"I was down to talk to her as well, and I even flew her and her son out to Chicago so we could all have a sit down and get things situated but she was more concerned about Chris. I believe she wants him back but Chris doesn't want her."

"Oh yeah, that's a really bad situation."

"So yeah, that's that." I say. "On a more serious note, I wanted to talk to you about Chris' addiction. He has a hard time with things sometimes, and it seems like he could fall back into that pattern of drug usage. It's not my job to police him, it's none of our jobs, but we all still have a little bit of concern, he's our daughter's father. You're around him more than we are. We would really appreciate it if you could just help him with that. I know it's a lot to ask and if you guys aren't that serious I know it's hard but please. You're around him the most:"

"Of course. I really do try with that but he seems good."

"Okay." I say

"I'm glad we were able to have this conversation. We can exchange numbers and do all of this stuff and have open communication." She says smiling.

"Of course." I say. "How is staying in the house with my cousin and friend?"

"They don't talk to me. Dori seems nice, but Mercedes wants nothing to do with me."

I laugh, "That's my cousin. They're waiting for me to tell them what's up but my cousin has her beliefs about Chris and I. I don't think she'll ever be okay with your relationship. That doesn't matter. We should all hang out, just the girls."

"That'll be cool." She says

"Great. I wonder how the boys are getting along."

"Chris is probably ripping Drake's heart out of his chest. He really dislikes him." She jokes and we laugh.

"We haven't heard commotion so I guess things are going well." I say

I hope everything is okay.

Chris' POV

"Look, the divorce is happening. We're not together, we're not getting back together. Ima need you to get over that. I get that you've got issues with your wife but that's for y'all to figure out. The only thing you and me need to be figuring out is how we're going to coexist, because once she's removed, it's just us. Your son has a sister who happens to be my daughter. We're going to be around each other for birthdays, maybe holidays and I think it will be dope if we could get it together." I say

"Yeah, I think so too but I know you feel me when it comes to her. She's making me crazy, dawg. She's taking me out of my body." He says

"Just give her what she wants." I say

"I can't do that." He says

"Well, then you're choosing to stay miserable. Because she's not gonna be happy until she gets what she wants and what she wants is to be divorced from you. And she can be evil sometimes. She will make your life hell on purpose and you know that shit. I wouldn't be fucking with that. She's gonna get what she wants one way or another." I try to warn him. I already know he knows what I'm talking about. I learned my lesson.

"I know it."

"So let's just drop all of his bullshit and be civil. We ain't gotta have conversations and do all the extra bullshit, but when we are around each other, we just need to be cool. Like it was when I was coming to see Genesis in Toronto." I say

"Yeah. It's all good. I apologize if I ever made you feel any type of way when it came to her or Gen. I love your daughter."

"Fa sho.. She loves you too. She said your name a couple of times, that shit pissed me off." I laugh. "We older now and I'm too old to be trying to fight niggas." I say and we both laugh again.

"Hell yeah. The last time we got a little scuffle, my shoulder was fucked up for a couple of months." He says

I see the girls walking out of the restaurant. They were laughing with each other. Thank God because I don't think I was going to be able to take another disagreement between Shawnie and somebody else.

"That's a good thing." I say

"Yeah. Shawnie doesn't like anybody so this is a great thing." He says laughing.

They walk up to us.

"Everything good?" Shawnie asks

"We good." Drake says

"Good! Jasmine and I had a talk, and we are very good actually." She says looking over at Jas.

"I'm glad to hear that." I say. "We talked a few things out. We're going to both try to keep the peace, for the sake of the kids."

"I'm so happy for you guys." She looks at Drake and he smiles. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes.

"I told the guys I would meet up with them after this." He says to her.

"Yeah, go ahead." She says, without hesitation, barely making eye contact.

He goes in to hug her and kisses her on the lips. You can tell it was forced. He says his goodbyes then leaves.

She turns to me. "So...."

"I was about to say fuck this." I say

She laughs. "I knew it. But I'm happy everything turned out good." She says

"We'll see how everything comes together or falls apart." I put my arm around Jasmine, without thinking. "Hopefully, we can be one big happy family now."

I look Shawnie in her eyes and can tell she feels a way seeing my arm around her, it's not like I can just move it because then it would be obvious. I should've thought this through.

"Um...yeah... I'm gonna go." She says

"Why? We didn't even get to eat." I say

"I'm not hungry. I was just coming for the talk. I'm gonna go back to the house and go to sleep." I know she's just making up an excuse to leave.

"But we literally just got here." I say

"Jet lagged..." she says

"The flight wasn't even an hour and a half." I really want her to stay and hang out. I feel bad because I made her feel uncomfortable and that was the last thing I was trying to do.

"I'm just tired." She says. "The three of us can get together another time."

"Yeah." I say. I'm actually a disappointment. I've been waiting for a time like this to arise where the three of us can just chill and they can hang out a little bit and get cool. But my stupid ass goes and make her feel uncomfortable by putting my arm around her.

"So, no girls night tonight?" Jasmine

"Yeah, I'm just gonna take a nap for about 30 minutes and we can do something." She says

"How are you gonna hang out with her but you don't wanna hang out with me?" I say. Hold up, now I'm offended.

"Chris, there will be other times the three of us can just hang out. We're on good terms now, but you have to realize that this is still new. She probably doesn't wanna see us together." Jasmine says

I don't say anything, but I just look at her. I know she knows what I'm thinking. She can read me. I have a lot to say but I'm not gonna say it. I kind of don't want to say it because I don't want Jasmine to get the wrong idea. I know she's right. Shawnie doesn't feel comfortable. I know she doesn't want to see this shit, even though we've somewhat come to terms with our situation. I know it's gonna take some time and some getting used to.

"So yeah, I'll see you later." She doesn't even give us time to say anything before she turned her back and was walking away.

"Damn." I say

"Give her time. I know you guys say you're over each other or trying to be over each other, whatever it is but seeing you with someone else might be a little hard for her. Isn't this the first time she's seen you with someone since her?" She asks

"Technically, yeah. Diamond doesn't count."

"There ya go. Give her time." She pats my chest.

I don't say anything. I just watch her walk away. I wanted to go after her, but I knew that was the wrong thing to do.

Shawnie's POV

I just walked off. It's not that I was pissed off or anything. It was just super weird for me. I was walking towards the car and I heard someone behind me. I knew it was Joe so I didn't really think too much of it. I got into our car and a couple of seconds later he opens the door and gets in with me, but on the driver's side.

"Are you okay?" Joe asks

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just don't want to see that. Everything is cool between us and I'm happy we talked and sorted everything out. I actually like her. She's cool. But I am not ready to see that yet." I explain

"You're human. You're always gonna feel a way about any person he's with because you were engaged to him. It's probably going to be the same way with Drake. You guys were actually married. Even though things aren't working out, you're still gonna have feelings towards whoever he is with after you." He says

"I still love Aubrey. I just wish things could've gone so much more differently. And I feel like I put all my eggs in the basket with him. Regardless of what people think, I was all in with him, and I was really willing to do any and everything I could for him. But clearly he didn't feel the same way...or maybe he did, he just doesn't know how to express it. I think he gets it now. I mean, I think he got it before, but I don't think he thought I was serious and he sees how serious I am now and he is trying to really do shit the right way, but I just wish she would've done it in the beginning and we would be nowhere near this point. It's sad. It's actually very sad to see him like this but I checked out so long ago. I just can't completely detach from him because I do love him and I still don't want to hurt him."

"Once again, you're a human. You're gonna feel that way. Time will pass and things will get easier. Especially if you find somebody who's loving you the right way. How you want and need to be loved." He says

"I don't think I'll find that in this lifetime. I know I'm still young, but I feel like I missed it. I feel like I should've found what I wanted years ago. Believe it or not, after everything was said and done, I thought that person was going to be Chris.....then I thought it was Aubrey. I really thought it was Aubrey." I scuff. "...So all of this I'm dealing with now, after him, is very heartbreaking for me. I'm not even sure if I want to try another relationship. It's like I don't have the want or need to be somebody else's. I don't want to love anyone nor do I want to open myself up to any more hurt."

"And I understand that. But you know what? I believe you're going to find somebody that wants to cater to your every need and be everything that you want them to be. You can't completely shut yourself off to that." He says

I scoff. "I'm not banking on it."

"Just be patient." He says smiling at me. "You're gonna find the person who wants to do all of that for you and more. And it's going to be easy. It's going to surprise the hell out of you. If it's right, it's right. You'll see." He smiles at me.

I don't say anything else. He starts the car and he takes me back to the house. 

What did you think about what happened in this chapter???