Shawnie's POV

"You're miscarrying." The doctor says

"Miscarrying?" Aubrey says, "Well do something!" He says in a panic. "Save the fucking baby!" He yells

"There's not much we can do at this point. Your HCG levels are dropping dramatically. Based on where the levels were when you came in, measurements of the fetus, it looks like you were possibly about six weeks pregnant. We are going to keep you a little longer to do another pelvic exam but I'm sorry, that's all we can do. We can't save the fetus." The doctor says

I just sat there. Pregnant? I was drinking, smoking, about to fight bitches, fighting with Aubrey, just doing a bunch of shit I shouldn't have been doing. All of which are mostly out of character for me. If I knew I was pregnant, I wouldn't have done any of that. I wish I would've known, I would've taken better care of myself and I wouldn't have been acting so reckless. Especially the mistake I made by sleeping with Chris.

I looked over at Aubrey and he was on the verge of tears. Well, that's how he looked. I know he wanted another baby. And finding out I was pregnant, and miscarried probably just killed him. I bet he's thinking about all this shit he's done to me and all of the stress he's caused. Especially the other day. Honestly, that's probably what did it.

I reached for Aubrey's hand. "Okay, thank you." I say to the doctor and he leaves a few seconds after.

Aubrey takes my hand and just shakes his head. "I can't believe this. Again..."

"The first time wasn't a miscarriage.."

"I know but...I still lost another baby." He sits down next to me on the bed. "We're being punished."

"Baby, we're not being punished. Sometimes things just don't work out. Maybe it isn't the time to have a baby with everything going on. Remember, my past could be a factor too."

"But the shit I did, that's the cause of this. I know it. I did this." He says

I don't say anything because this could definitely be the reason this happened. I don't know what happened yesterday and all I can say is I hope it doesn't happen again.

Just then we hear a knock on the door. Thinking it's the doctor, Aubrey just yells for them to come in. In walks Chris, holding a bouquet of blue roses.

"YO! GETTHE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!" Aubrey yells, walking towards Chris. "WHO THE FUCK LET YOU UP HERE?"

"Joe walked me in." Chris says, looking confused.

Aubrey looks back at me. "They all are fired. ALL OF THEM MOTHERFUCKERS!"

"Aubrey stop! Now isn't the time." I say

Two of his security guys walk in and Joe comes in behind them.

"You're right, now isn't the time. Get the fuck out of here!" He yells at Chris. "Do we need to get a restraining order against you for you to stay the fuck away from us? Every time I turn around you up in her face."

"I was told she—."

Aubrey cuts him off, "I don't give a fuck! Get out! Get your desperate ass out of here! Leave me and my wife alone!" Aubrey turns to Eric, "How did he get up here?"

"I let him in." Joe said, looking at me. "No one told me not to. I thought it was cool."

"It's NEVER cool for this bitch to be around us. How much do I fucking pay you and you can't even do something as simple as this?" He snaps at Joe.

I look over at Joe and he's starting Aubrey down. You could tell he wants to say something to him, but he is trying his hardest not to.

"You're fine, Joe. Thank you." I say to him, then look at Chris. "Chris, I will text you later. Now isn't a good time."

"Mercedes told me you were in the hospital, so I just wanted to check on you." He says

"Thank you, but you can check on me through text. From now on we will only communicate by text message. If it's an emergency, obviously you can call me to get in contact with the fastest way, but for right now, we only need to speak through text and only about our daughter."

"Oh...why? Is he making you do this beca—."

I cut him off, "It's my decision."

"Oh..." Chris says. "I see..." he takes a step back.

I feel horrible and I can literally see his heartbreaking but if I want to make things right between Aubrey and I this is what I need to do.

"So like I said, get the fuck out of here." Aubrey says

Chris' eyes go from me to Aubrey. I see the change in his eyes. Chris squints his eyes and frowns his face up at him.

"Fuck you, bitch." Chris says, calmly, but very disrespectfully.

Aubrey started to say something but I stopped him by grabbing his shirt.

Chris looks back at me then he turns around. He throws the flowers on the sofa and walks out.

I run my hands over my face. "Shit!."

"You did that." He says to me and he is completely correct. I did do this.

"I know. I'll have a conversation with him another day."

"I want to be present for that conversation. I don't trust him." He says

"Okay. I don't want to worry about that right now."

"True. So you had no idea you were pregnant?" He asks and yeah, I was just as surprised as he was.

"No. How are we going to handle this?" I ask

"Judging by the blow up today, I think we should release a statement. I don't want people speculating about why we were here. So let's just be honest but vague. We can just say we had another miscarriage and that people should respect her privacy."

"Okay." I say

"I'll have Amanda get on that." He pulls his phone out and starts texting people.

I dodged a huge bullet.

*************

Chris POV

When I walked out of that hospital room I knew she was different and it was going to stay that way as long as she was with him. She knows the relationship that we have and she knows that she can't let go of our friendship. We have a coparenting relationship that we have to keep going, so I know that this isn't the end of anything but I've tried long enough. I can't keep doing this shit. I tried to get along with him and it was working because we didn't have to deal with each other as often but now it seems like shit is out of hand.

I understand why he's upset, especially with me, I fucked his wife. I would be mad too but she saved him today. I really refrained from beating his ass today and I'm proud of myself. If this was old Chris, I would've threw his ass out the fucking window. But now, since I'm older and I know how to somewhat manage my anger, I'm just gonna walk away from the situation. I'm sure she'll be calling me to let me know what's really going on sometime soon.

I have no more to say about this situation. I wash my hands.

***********

Shawnie's POV

They ended up sending me home that night and Aubrey and I were just sad. Neither one of us knew there was even a possibility that I could be pregnant so it was a shock to even find out that I was but then that shock was taken away when we found out we had a miscarriage. It was actually a very emotional and draining day and all I wanted to do was go home and get in the bed and be by myself. I didn't want to talk to anyone.

The next day, Aubrey decided that he was going to fly to Tucson because he had to work. I didn't really complain because he had already canceled his engagement in Houston and I thought it would be kind of selfish of me to ask him to cancel another. It's not like we knew we were going to have a miscarriage the next day, so I told him it was okay to leave. I didn't want him to, but I felt that it was a decision that he needed to make, so I gave that to him and he chose to leave. I was pissed.

Mercedes and Dori came over and spent some time with me. We had lunch together and literally did nothing. I told them what happened and they felt horrible, especially Mercedes because she was trying to get Chris and I back together. She said if she would've known that I was pregnant she would not have gone so hard to try to get us together. I explained to her that it was okay and none of us knew that was going to be the outcome.

I decided to keep the events that happened between Aubrey and I in the bathroom to myself because I was embarrassed and I know Mercedes would probably put a hit out on him if she couldn't get to him. However, I did tell them that I was thinking about taking some time away from everything and everyone and they agreed with my decision. I just want time to myself so I can think clearly about what I really wanna do with my life right now.

I hadn't realized that Dorian and Mercedes hadn't officially met Joe the other day. When she came over she said that Joe guy but I never formally introduced them. So when Joe came in from doing his morning run, I introduced everyone to my new bodyguard.

We all were sitting in the living room talking and Joe walked in. We all got quiet. I looked over at Dori and she was practically drooling over him.

"Good morning, ladies." He walks in covered in sweat.

"Joe, this is my friend Dorian and my cousin Mercedes."

"Call me Dori." She smiles at him, holding her hand out for him to shake it. She better knock it off.

Joe chuckles a little bit but he shakes her hand. Then he looks at Mercedes.

"I remember you from the other day." He says

"Yeah, now you know I'm not lying." She smiles

"I didn't think you were lying, you were just a little aggressive. I wasn't expecting all that aggression to come out of such a small package." He says and we all laugh.

"Joe, do you want to sit down and get to know the girls? They're around a lot." I laugh

"There's no reason that he shouldn't know us already." Mercedes gives me a look. "You've been locked up over here with Mr. President as your dad would call him."

"Oh please, I don't wanna hear any of that. Both of you have been locked in Trey's bedroom." I say

They both laugh.

"That's what I thought." I say

I see Dori look back at Joe. "So Joe, are you single?" She asks

"Why?" I ask irritated.

"It's okay, Shawnie." He looks at Dori. "I'm single."

"It doesn't matter if he's single or not. You two aren't. Leave Joe alone." I say

They laugh.

"I look forward to getting to know both of you more but I have to go shower. I'll see you guys later." Joe says then leaves.

"See, Dori, you ran the man off." Mercedes laughs.

"I don't think I said anything out of the ordinary. I was just trying to get to know him. But little Miss Shawnie over here is like a pitbull." Dori says, laughing.

"Yeah, what's up with that?" Mercedes says

"Nothing. I just don't think you guys should bother him. He's nice and I wanna keep him." I laugh

Mercedes just stares at me for a few seconds and then squints her eyes.

"I know you ma'am...."

"Yeah, so?" I say

"I'm watching you." She says in a warning tone.

"There's nothing to watch me about. I have a genuine friendship with Joe and the little conversations that we've had, he's shed a lot of light on certain things and situations. I don't know if it's because it's coming from him but things seem to resonate with me when he says it. But I'm not gonna lie to you, I feel a connection with him. Not romantically or anything like that, I'm just trying to hold onto it. Joe is genuinely a nice guy and I don't want any of this to corrupt him in any way. Especially Dori."

Dori laughs, then shrugs.

"Well now I'm a little jealous." Mercedes frowns

"I don't mean to make you jealous or anything but I'm just saying he's easy to talk to."

"And I'm not?"

"Mercedes, sometimes you are but you know when it comes to certain things you get a little judgie and especially with Aubrey, you don't like him that much. So your solution to everything is for me to leave him and it's not that easy." I explain

"Well, you should leave."

"Well, I don't necessarily appreciate you telling me to leave him while we're sitting in his house." I say

"Fuck this house. And fuck him. If I had control over this whole situation, I would make you divorce him. And since he wants to be such a dumbass and not have you sign a prenup, I would have you take everything from him, including this house. And if I were you, I would start fucking on Joe's sexy ass to pass the time. Make the transition a little bit easier. Then when all of that is done and over, you guys can ride off into the sunset together and do whatever the fuck you wanna do with Drake's money." Mercedes says

"Damn, you have all of this planned out, huh?" I say

"Yes, you down?" She asks and I don't say anything. I just laugh.

The crazy thing about this is I know she's dead ass serious. I'm not gonna lie, it has definitely crossed my mind a couple of times. With everything that's been going on, divorce is definitely in the back of my mind right now, but I don't know how serious I am about these ideas though. We have issues and they can be worked out. I don't necessarily think divorce is a conversation and needs to be had right now, but like I just said, it's in the back of my mind.

*******

I texted Chris to see if he could meet me somewhere so we could talk. I didn't wanna go anywhere in public with him because I simply didn't want to be seen with him. After everything that happened at the hospital, being seen with Chris was the last thing I wanted. I was trying to keep the peace with Aubrey and if he got wind of me talking to Chris without his knowledge, he would probably flip his shit all over again.

I went by myself to meet Chris. I made sure Dori and Mercedes stayed at home while I did this. I drove into his neighborhood but I didn't go to his house. I actually just drove until I came to a random intersection and I just parked my car. I dropped a pin and waited for him to show up. Once he got there, I got into his car so we could talk.

"What's up?" He says, not making eye contact with me.

He was upset and he had a very good reason to be. Aubrey really didn't have to go off on him the way he did and it didn't help that I didn't really say anything to Aubrey when he was going at Chris. I know I should've, but I didn't. I feel bad about that.

I looked over at Chris and I could tell he was upset, hurt, and I know him so I know he felt that if he looked at me he would soften his demeanor. He had an attitude and he wanted to hold onto it. There's nothing wrong with that. I deserve a little attitude right now.

"I wanted to apologize for what happened at the hospital. Aubrey was way out of line....but, in his defense, I told him what happened. Emotions from that were still high. We had a pretty rough couple of days and him seeing you just made him lose it." I explained the best way I could.

"Don't make excuses for him. If you told him we fucked then aight, but the way he talked to me, I should've whooped his ass." He says facing straight, staring out the windshield.

"I'm not making excuses for him and I'm not justifying anything that he did. Believe me, if you would have put hands on him, he 100% deserved it. I understand you were concerned about me being in the hospital and I appreciate you coming up there, but just like when I had my son, you can't just pop up and expect everything to be fine. This isn't that type of situation. I'm married and my husband does not care for you. I wish things were different but they're not. We have to find a way to get through this without all of this shit going on all the time." I say

"I agree." He still isn't making any type of eye contact with me.

".....Chris, we should talk about what happened."

"I know that deserves a conversation because I'm confused as hell right now, but I don't wanna talk about it." He says

"How do you not wanna talk about it? We have to talk about it so we can move on from it."

"Move on from it..." He reiterates. "You're the only one who thinks it was a mistake. I don't, I did it because I wanted to. Hell, you wanted to do it. I feel like you're putting yourself through hell staying with him. You know you don't wanna be with him like that. You want me. You know you do." He says upset.

I look over at him to study him and he just looks so confused and upset and I really want to make this better for him but for me to make things better for him, I would be crossing a line. I can't do that again.

"Feelings are still there. I can admit that. But based on the fact that I'm married, that means I cannot act on that. I was wrong, and I was selfish for sleeping with you. You can feel how you feel because you're entitled to that, but I'm also allowed to feel what I'm feeling and I feel regret and I feel very guilty because I cheated on my husband." I confess

"A husband that I'm sure cheats on you, you just don't know what yet." He spits out

Wow, I can't believe he just said that.

"You know, I'm dealing with a lot right now." I say frustrated. "It's not anything that I care to discuss with you at this moment, but all of this, what you're doing, is not making this easier."

He scuffs and looks out of his window.

"You have every right to have an attitude with me, but I'm right and you're gonna have to move on." I say

"Done." Is all he says

"Fine. Is there anything else?"

"What do you mean is there anything else? You called me here." He snaps

I sigh out of frustration and irritation. "Okay, Christopher. You got this little attitude with me and I'm not the one that's gonna be feeling bad about it later on. You will. I suggest you talk to me like you got some fucking sense because all of this is not needed. I'm trying to be an adult and talk to you and you're saying all of these petty little things. It's not necessary. We both know what we did and we both know we are wrong regardless of what we think is right." I say

"Are you done?" He asks with that same damn attitude.

I don't say anything else, I just get out of his car. When he gets like this there's really no talking to him. He's gonna do what he wants to do and until he decides he's done having an attitude, this is the person that I'm gonna get.

Whatever.

**********

The next three or four nights were kind of a blur. Mercedes, Dorian, and I literally went out all of those nights in a row. I just wanted to forget the shit that I was going through and it might not have been the best decision or the best way to forget but it was working for me.

Aubrey came home after him being gone for three days. I really didn't have anything to say to him. After talking it out with my girls, I realized how he should not have left me at a time where I probably needed my husband the most. So I was very upset with him. Last night when he got in, I was out, he literally begged me to come home because he didn't feel I should be out with our current situation going on and he just wanted me to be home with him. I told him no. I had the biggest attitude with him because I couldn't believe he had the nerve to ask me to come home because he felt I shouldn't be out when he was out of town for literally three days doing something that he probably could have postponed.

Why should I always have to be the one to fold when he doesn't do that for me. He puts his career and businesses over me all the time. Just because he stayed home with me one night, which doesn't happen often, doesn't mean that I get the same respect from him. He leaves me all the time regardless of whether the situation is important or not. Fuck that. I'm not gonna continue to be this way. If I want to go out and blow off steam and then that's what I'm gonna do.

What did you think about this chapter??
What do you think will happen now??