Shawnie's POV

"I was focused on being pregnant and trying not to have my baby on a tour bus." I laugh. "So this is something that no one knows....before Chris went into rehab he wanted to talk to Aubrey because I was very pregnant and he was going away and he didn't want him in his bullshit antics and send me into labor early."

"What was the conversation about?"

"Basically we told him we were gonna sue him if he continued to harass us, but that quickly turned into a conversation that I was kicked out of and I don't know what happened in that hotel room.... Well, I do know." I smile

"What?"

"They got into it." I say

"Physically?"

"I believe so. Chris never told me what happened. But the very next day he sent a file to me and it was that Lie To Me song."

"Did you listen to it?" He asks

"Yeah, I listened to it but right after I was done I just reblocked him on everything. I knew he was hurt, but I also thought maybe Chris didn't get through to him because we didn't have any conversation. It was just no communication and he didn't say anything. He just sent the file and honestly, I just know that is his way of expressing himself, so I didn't feel like he needed a response from me so I just blocked him."

"So that ended communication until when you guys met up in Chicago?" He asks

"Actually, no. While Chris was in rehab, he actually wanted me to talk to him because he... I guess he was thinking a little bit more clearly...I don't know. Maybe because he was in a lot of therapy and talked a lot of things out, so maybe he wanted us to talk it out I don't know." I laugh. "But he wanted me to talk to him and just have a real conversation. I wasn't okay with it at first because I knew how he felt about me, but I just did it because he asked me to. And on the way there a lot of things that I wanted to say started to come to surface." I explain. "My thought process was to end whatever residual feelings he had for me, and to give him the opportunity to say whatever he felt he needed to say to me because when I left, I had no plans on ever speaking to him, or seeing him again in my life."

"So how did that go?"

"It went.... " I chuckle reflecting on the time we spent together. "The time that Aubrey and I spent together was good times. When I broke up with Chris, we had the opportunity to really get to know each other and that's what we did. We got close. He knew Chris and I could get back together and we had plenty of conversations about it. Our friendship was a good friendship that turned somewhat romantic, but I knew in the back of my mind that it could never happen, because I was very focused on Chris. As much as I liked Aubrey, I just couldn't do that to Chris. So in Toronto, the conversation between Aubrey and I was me telling him that I loved him but it's not going to go anywhere and that I needed him to stop all the BS and forget about me because I was about to be engaged to Chris and I wasn't going to let him mess it up."

"But don't you think telling him you loved him would have the opposite effect."

"No, because he knew. But our situation wasn't going to go anywhere and the reason I was there was to end it for good."

"So how did he take it?"

"Overall, he was upset about it, but he understood. I told him not to contact me unless he was dying and I left."

"So then how did he end up in Chicago with his tongue down your throat in the middle of Tao?"

"There's a lot of things that happened in between that time. So yeah, it had been months that I hadn't talked to him but that's when Chris' ex came in to play. She contacted Aubrey to get to us and that opened the door for me to have to communicate with Aubrey because I needed to get information on that situation, so that's what started it all. The conversation wasn't about us, it was about that situation and Chris was okay with that because he was home and he could see everything that was going on." I explain

"Care to share about that situation?"

"No, I'm not gonna get into that situation. I'm just gonna stick with this because that is something that Chris should share if he wants to. So moving on, Chris and I got engaged, and things were good. We did the IndigGoat tour, and shortly after that, I had the baby." I explain. "Everything was okay but it wasn't great. It seemed like after I had the baby things between Chris and I started going downhill and he kept bringing up all of his old shit. Like we would argue literally about nothing. I felt like he was just starting fights with me, just because. And he kept bringing up Aubrey and I was postpartum and..." I stop because I feel like I'm rambling. I take a breath and I continue. "All I wanted was for my fiancé to be there for me emotionally and at that time he wasn't. There's no other way to put it, he wasn't. After arguing with him, literally non stop, him acting as if our daughter was only his, and him just mistreating me, I was drained. I called Aubrey." I explain

"Why did you call him?"

"I knew he would give me what I needed. It's not that I was trying to leave my situation but I needed something... Chris wasn't giving me anything and if I would have stayed and dealt with everything, I don't feel that I would be here right now." I admit

"Was it that bad?" He asks

"It was bad for me. It wasn't just arguments. It was a lot of verbal abuse and not even getting an apology for anything. Not feeling the love that I knew he had for me, was a lot for me. On top of me having a two month old, not knowing what the fuck I'm doing, I don't have my mom to show me any of this shit... I was really going through a lot emotionally and he wasn't giving me any emotional support. I needed it and I wasn't getting it and I was not in a good space. I felt I could not take care of my daughter, so in a way I feel like I did what I had to do. I wasn't calling him because I wanted to get back with him. I just needed someone to tell me, everything was okay and I was doing something right. Everything was wrong with him. I needed some type of reassurance that things were going to get better and that I was going to be okay. And that's exactly what Aubrey did. It wasn't anything romantic about that night. We were together for a few hours. I just needed to get out of that environment. All we did was go to the studio." I smile

"Why are you smiling?"

"Honestly, I'm just thinking back and putting myself back in that time and it was a really good time. Again, there was nothing romantic about that night. It was just him being a friend to me and it meant a lot to me." I looked over at Joe because I felt the vibe was changing. I quickly stopped smiling.

"How did Chris feel about it?"

"He was upset about it and we argued. Of course it made things worse because now he had the visual of me leaving to go be with Aubrey and he thought I was cheating. That argument was very bad for our relationship. Very bad. I knew what I had done but I felt I did what I had to do for my sanity and to this day, I don't regret that decision I made. Everyone was against me, but I know I made the right decision in getting out of that environment." I say

"So what happened after that?"

"We talked about it, and I told him exactly what I did, and why I made the decision. I'm not innocent in any of this and no, maybe I shouldn't have called him, but I did, and we got through it, but the cracks were still there. The convo that night between Aubrey and I opened the door for us to really have a deep conversation about everything. He told me all of his feelings. Like, really shared everything with me. He also asked me what I needed, he asked me what I needed from him, and he asked me what I wanted to do. I simply answered those questions, and a decision was made and we moved in together." I explained. "I know that was wrong of me and Chris was owed a conversation but like I keep saying, I did what I felt I needed to do."

"He was arrested that night."

"Yes, but that's not something I'm willing to talk about."

"Okay. So let's skip to the marriage part. Some people said it was fake. Some people said you guys weren't even in love for real, but I've been in the same place where the two of you were together and I could see it. You guys were in love." He says and I smile.

"We were. That's another decision I'm not sure I fully regret. I regret a lot of things when it came to Aubrey, but we were in love. I mean, I have to admit that it was fast that maybe I shouldn't have married him as quickly as I did, but on the other hand, it's what we wanted to do. I don't care what nobody says. Aubrey and I were obsessively in love with each other. When we were able to actually just be together, and not care about how people felt it felt good." I say. "I think people said that because we kept our relationship so private. They didn't know what to think about it."

"That's true."

"So we got married at his house in Hidden Hills in private. It was something that we talked about, and it was executed. We got married in the living room." I laugh. "We were never really engaged. It was just a conversation. Like I said, we were in love. We just wanted to do it."

"What was that conversation like?"

"The conversation was literally, you said you would marry me whenever I wanted to, so let's do it."

"So it was your idea?"

"Technically, he said he would do it then I just brought it back up. I guess you can say that." I shrug

"Whaaat?" He says in disbelief. "He is so soft for you."

"It was very impulsive, but looking back I see I was very impulsive when it came to him. I don't regret anything that we did because we did what we felt was right at the time. Just like our son Atlas, he was planned. It wasn't planned like let's have a baby, it was pretty much like we knew exactly what we were doing and we knew what was gonna happen and we were okay with it. But like I said, it was in that timeframe where everything was just bliss."

"What was it like being married to Drake?"

"... To be completely honest with you, being married to Drake was great. I had everything that I ever needed and I also had everything that I've ever wanted. If I didn't have it, I could get it. He made sure I didn't want for anything. I was exposed to people that I thought I would never interact with in my life. The level of celebrity that came with that I wasn't ready for, but it was nice. I was literally getting contracts up the ass just because I was married to him."

"Do you miss it?" He asks with a smile on his face.

I just stared at him for a few seconds with a smile on my face.

"What? It's okay to miss it." He says

".....I hate you." I say then I look at Joe. He shrugs his shoulders.

"Don't look over there, answer the question."

My smile gets bigger and I nod my head. "It has nothing to do with him, it's the lifestyle."

"You look like someone who likes the lifestyle. You need someone with money to satisfy you."

"I just like certain things." I laugh

"When did it go wrong?" He asks

"It went wrong when I decided I wanted to come back to LA. I moved to Toronto because that was his primary residence. Things started to pick up a little more for his career and he was gone more, which was okay, but I was left in that big gorgeous house by myself and I was lonely. It was just me, the kids, some of the staff. We were dealing with it and we made an agreement that we wouldn't go longer than like four days without seeing each other. Everything was pretty much good but when I came back to LA, he had reservations because my ex was there. That led to multiple situations that made our situation and our marriage worse and ultimately led to us getting divorced."

"So now you're single and you're living your best life. You've been linked to a few celebrities since then and you've been seen out in public with a couple different people, so I'm gonna name them and you tell me if you dated them or if you guys are just friends."

"Okay..."

"Jayson Tatum?"

"No, we didn't date. We just went out to dinner." I say

"Nothing was there?"

I shake my head no. "My focus was on someone else at the time and he's a little young for me. He was super cool though." I say

"You know he's cool with your ex husband."

I shrug. "We didn't talk about that."

"Jalen hurts?"

"I liked Jalen. He was cool as well but no we didn't date either."

"Vibe wasn't right."

"Vibe was good...." I smile

"What happened?"

"Nothing.

"If the opportunity presented itself again, would you go on another date with him?"

"If I were single and wasn't in a situation where someone could get hurt, then yeah. He's a nice guy."

"Ima remember that." We laugh. "What about Odell Beckham?"

"I knew you were going to say his name, and I know I can't get away from it. So when Odell and I officially met, yes it was at my ex-husband's video shoot. We had no conversation other than hi and hello. That was pretty much the gist of our conversation. Fast forward to a couple years later. I ran into him in Vegas, coincidentally, I had literally just filed and the media picked it up. So it looked like we ran off to Vegas. No, that was not true."

"So, what did happen?"

"I had already had a trip planned to Vegas, but a situation happened right before we left—."

"The situation where your bodyguard punched Drake in the face and you had to call the police on him because he wouldn't leave your house?"

I laugh, "Yes. After that situation happened we left for Vegas. I ran into Odell in the lobby and we were just talking. That's what they got the pictures of. He invited all of us to a pool party and fast forward a couple hours later that's where the second picture came out. That's all it was."

"And then Chris shows up?"

"Yeah, Chris showed up because he had heard what happened. Wanted to make sure everything was okay. We were going out to lunch, and again, ran into Odell again. He invited us out again. We all went out together as friends. Nothing was going on between anyone and that's it."

"But so we're gonna fast forward a little more, almost a year later, you were posting pictures of this mysterious man and you made a little game out of it and everybody was guessing but you never came clean about who it was. Who was it? I thought it was Odell."

"After the third picture I thought people knew who it was. That's why I stopped because I got scared." I laugh. "But he ended up talking me into going to one of his games and that's when all of that stuff happened that they got the picture of a weird angle, and they thought we were kissing. After that we had a talk and decided it was best that we end our situation."

"You didn't want Drake to find out." He comments

"We were keeping it private and it had been successful for almost 8 months." I say

"You stopped talking to him because Drake was mad?"

"Aubrey had nothing to do with it. We ended things before he even found out. People fail to realize that they weren't even friends even when Aubrey and I were married. He was in a video that was the first and the last time I had ever seen or talked to Odell until I ran into him in Vegas. There were no conversations about Him and Aubrey. They weren't friends, and they had all of us fooled, including myself. I knew nothing about it because we never talked about it, but it makes sense now. AND come to find out, here's some tea for you, Jason... Odell claimed to have liked me first."

"So what happened with that?"

"I don't know exactly what happened with that, but Odell told me that he had made a comment to Aubrey saying I was cute and if things fell through between Chris and I that he was gonna try to talk to me, but the next thing he knew Aubrey and I were doing whatever we were doing so he was upset about it."

"See, shady." He says. "What happened between you and OBJ? Why did it end?"

"Odell is great and he's a good man and he is very patient. He was very patient with me. I just want to stress the fact that it wasn't about him going behind his friends back because it wasn't that it was just us vibing together."

"Did y'all have sex? Because if y'all had sex y'all was together."

We both laugh.

"We weren't. We were serious, but we weren't physical."

"I felt like we were still getting to know each other in a way. Also, I had other distractions. He did things on my time and I appreciated that. Everything was my decision of what I felt comfortable with, but he just wasn't a certain person."

"That sexy bodyguard of yours...." He looks over at Joe.

I laugh, "No."

"You not ready to talk about that yet?"

I just look at him.

"No Joe talk?"

I shake my head, no.

"Alright, so let's talk about Chris. What's the situation with him and what's it like coparenting?"

"Coparenting with Chris is great. We literally don't have any issues. After we both realized that we are best as really good friends, everything became a lot easier."

"Yeah, cause he has a girlfriend right?"

"I don't know..." I know he's talking about Karrueche, but I'm not gonna put Chris's business out like that. I don't know the level of their relationship or even if they're actually in a relationship, so I'm just gonna leave that alone.

"I know you don't wanna talk about him, but I have to ask the same question referring to your coparenting with Drake, how is it?" He asks

"Coparenting with him is...okay. They're both great fathers and we have a relationship to where I feel as long as they communicate with me they can come get the kids anytime they want. Coparenting with both is great."

"You really don't want to badmouth your Drake?"

"I'm trying to be cautious because he is who he is and I do not want to stir up anything that will upset my peace. I've come a long way, and I just refuse to jeopardize that."

"I hear he has a baby on the way...how do you feel about that?"

"I feel nothing. That's his life."

"You aren't upset he got some random woman pregnant?"

"It's not ideal but I'm not upset. We're divorced and I wish him, his new girlfriend, and baby mama the best." I say as politely as possible.

"It was rumored that he had you arrested? Is that true?"

"Did you find a mugshot?" I ask

"No."

"Then I wasn't arrested."

"But we have shots of your hot body guard, covering your head with his shirt, leaving the police station, so what was that about?

"That Is about something that I'm not going to talk about. But we can talk about my hot bodyguard with no shirt on and how he broke the Internet and sent all the little girls into a frenzy." I laugh

"You know what, yeah, let's talk about that. How do you feel about the level of popularity your bodyguard has been getting on the Internet?"

"I don't see anything wrong with it. I think it's funny. He doesn't have social media. He doesn't really get involved with things like that so he only knows from when people mention it that women are literally going crazy over him."

"Some people say he is hotter than Chris and Drake put together."

I look over at Joe. "I can see it." I smile.

"When I think about your situation, I think about the movie The bodyguard."

I laugh.

"I mean really. Y'all are together all the time. I know he lives with you. You guys spend all day together. You never just found yourself in his bed?"

I laugh. "Let's change the subject. I'd rather talk about my ex-husband than this conversation."

He looks at me for a long few seconds. I know he knows something is going on between Joe and I but he's not gonna get any information out of me.

"Aight... I hear he's dating."

"Well, that's good for him. Maybe he will stay off of my cell phone now." I smile. "Not that that's ever stopped him."

"Do you know what I think?"

"What?"

"I think he was really in love with you, and I think that when you didn't reciprocate that love, he lost it."

"I loved him. I loved Aubrey a lot."

"Yeah, but I don't think it was as much as he loved you. I'm on the outside looking in and he looked like he was in love. He did a lot of crazy stuff that a crazy person in love would do." He says. "We've seen him in love before and it was short-lived and he didn't marry them but we saw it and with you that was consistent, but it also was like times 100."

"I loved him, but it was a very complicated situation. And to be honest, I felt like he just didn't know how to show it in ways that weren't materialistic." I start. "I learned to love him from what I thought was love. My ex-husband and I, when we were good, we were great. We had great communication. We would talk about everything, we would talk through things and it was just so messed up because at the time I wanted that with my fiancé. He helped me through that situation, and regardless, if people wanted to hear that or not, he really got me through that. When we got back to LA, it was a jealousy thing. I think everybody knows that."

"He said he was jealous of Chris Brown?"

"He wasn't jealous of him. He was jealous of our relationship. Which I understand. Looking back, I definitely see how it got on his nerves and the things that Chris and I were doing could definitely make an outside significant other look at us sideways. It was just the friendship that we've had. Chris and I have always been friends, great friends. You have to be a very secure person to come into a situation like that......." I say

"That's true."

"..... I'm trying to be as real as I can with this interview without bashing anyone. So Aubrey I know you gotta watch this when you see this. I'm sorry if this offends you in any way. But Jason, there are things that happened within my marriage and conversations that were had that makes me feel otherwise. You may see that he's doing all of these things for me like his women's jewelry like with Tiffany's that's coming out. I think it's a great gesture, and if we were still married, I would love it, hell I love it now, but you don't know what happened at the Tiffany's event. So it's like everything that you guys see it's just for show. Aubrey and I kept up appearances for months. I was living in San Diego almost a year before I filed for divorce. My marriage was good until it wasn't and when it wasn't it was horrible. I think it was 10 times worse than any relationship that I've had. I don't doubt that he loved me. I know he loved me and I know he still loves me. He tells me every chance he gets but I just have to make a decision for myself and I don't care how people think about it anymore."

"So speaking of the Tiffany's event, we actually do know a little bit of what went on because it was reported by yours truly. What happened?"

"We were very much separated at the time, and I was living in San Diego, but he didn't want anyone to know, of course. We got together to keep up appearances, and this event was no different. We were hoping to smile and go our separate ways. Once the event was over and we were going home, we had a heated argument in the car. I don't know what pictures you were speaking of, but I got out of the car and he wanted me to get back in because he didn't want everyone to know that we were arguing. And that's what everyone saw."

"I also saw your sexy bodyguard come to your rescue."

"Well, that's what he was supposed to do." I smile

"You really aren't gonna tell me?"

"There's nothing to tell. Yeah, he's my bodyguard but he's my friend as well. Joe helps me a lot and I am so grateful for him and I appreciate the type of person that he is to me."

"Mmmmhmmmmm. I know you don't wanna talk about it but me and you had a conversation and I've seen some things. You wanna tell us something about you and Joe?"

To be continued...