The hours went by smoothly. Kinalimutan na lang muna namin ni Hunter ang mga nangyari kanina at nag-focus na lang sa pag-prepare ng foods. Hapon na nang dumating ang mga kaibigan ni Mama, pati na rin si Papa na ngayon ay halatang nakainom.

"Was that your dad?" Hunter asked.

Pinaypayan ko ang ihawan para maluto nang mabuti ang mga nilulutong barbecue at liempo.

"Yep," I answered. "Hindi lang halata dahil hindi na nila mahal ang isa't isa."

Tumawa si Hunter sa sinabi ko bago ibinaliktad ang mga liempo gamit ang tong. Mabuti talaga't nagkakarinigan pa kami nang mabuti rito, gayong ang lakas ng tugtugan dito sa garden. Nagsasayawan na ang ilang mga kaibigan ni Mama na para bang nasa disco sila.

"Bakit mo naman nasabing hindi na nila mahal ang isa't isa?"

Nagkibit-balikat ako. "They were just basically staying together because they are so used to each other's presence. They don't love each other anymore but they can't live their lives apart."

Tumango-tango siya. "So, you're basically telling me that they can't live without each other?"

I scoffed. "Parang gano'n pero ang hirap i-explain. My mother provides everything my dad needs in the house. She's a literal housewife, while my father works to provide money for the family. Typical Filipino households."

Tumango-tango ulit siya. "Seems normal to me but there's something in your tone."

I chuckled slightly. "My mother never had the money of her own. Kapag nanghihingi siya ng pera sa tatay ko, palagi siyang may naririnig sa tatay kong masasakit na salita, when in the first place, it was his idea na 'wag nang magtrabaho ang nanay ko at mag-stay na lang bilang housewife. That's why my mother is very ecstatic whenever she receives something from me or from other people. Did you see her reaction when Leo gave her a gift earlier? She's so happy. She wasn't really materialistic. She's an appreciative person, rather."

Hunter took the fan from my hand and continued what I was doing when he realized my arms were kinda tired. I let him.

"I have no words for that. But your mother really looked so kind. Magkamukha nga kayo." He chuckled. "Pero bakit galit ka sa kanilang dalawa?"

I shook my head. "I'm not angry. I'm just pissed off. May sama lang ako ng loob sa kanila. Angry is a strong word."

He chuckled. "Okay, then. Why are you holding a grudge against them?"

I smiled a little. "My mother tolerated my dad's behavior. Since then, he has been a chain-smoker, until now. I can forgive that because everyone has a habit they can't just let go. What hurts me the most is how my father would literally borrow money from his friends—from the bank—just to invest in a company that would end up bankrupt in a span of a few months. It happened so often that we didn't know, he made our house and lot as collateral for the money he borrowed for the bank. Kaya ngayon, hirap na hirap akong mag-ipon dahil binabayaran ko ang utang niya, 'wag lang silang mawalan ng tirahan."

Hunter was really quiet the whole time I told him that. He didn't interrupt me. He listened to me diligently like I was his music.

"Does your father work to help you with paying his debt?"

I smirked. "Not anymore. He was diagnosed with heart disease. He can't work like he used to anymore. But he works to provide for house expenses like bills and food."

Hunter fell completely silent after finding out about that. He might be feeling sorry or now pitying me but I won't accept that. Kaya ko naman bayaran ang utang ng mga magulang ko at may matitira pa rin sa akin kahit papaano. It's just that . . . it's hard to completely pay their debt because I know that they will do it again soon after they find out that they are completely debt-free.

"You know that you're not obliged to do that, right?" he said.

I shook my head. "I am. My father told me that I am."

He smiled a little. "Parents are not perfect humans. They lie to make themselves feel better. You should choose yourself first sometimes. It wasn't your debt so don't pressure yourself too much to pay for it."

The night came, naubos na ang bisita ni Mama. Karamihan na lang ng nandito ay mga kaibigan ni Papa at nag-iinuman sila sa isang mesa. Kasama nila doon si Hunter, katabi pa si Papa. Hindi tuloy ako mapakali dahil baka mamaya, ano na ang pinag-uusapan nila. Hilig pa naman ni Papa na mag-self-pity na para bang kinakawawa ko siya.

"Magpahinga ka na sa loob anak, ako na ang magliligpit niyan."

Lumingon ako kay Mama na nililigpit na ang mga pinagkainan at ang iba pang kalat sa mesa. Napanguso ako.

"Paano ko naman iiwan si Hunter kay Papa? Tingnan mo nga't napakaseryoso ng pinag-uusapan ng dalawa do'n. Baka mamaya, ano nang sinasabi ni Papa."

Ngumiti si Mama bago lumapit sa akin nang bahagya. "Boyfriend mo ba siya?"

Mabilis na nag-init ang mukha ko sa sinabi niya. "Hindi, 'no! Magkaibigan lang kami."

Tumawa siya. "Eh si Leo lang ang kaibigan mong lalaki na ipinakilala sa amin. Parang hindi naman yata normal sa 'yo na magdala ka ng lalaki rito, lalo na't ngayon ko lang din narinig ang pangalan niya mula sa 'yo. Dati'y hindi ko man nakikita ang mga nagiging nobyo mo, naririnig ko naman ang mga pangalan nila sa 'yo."

Hindi ako nakapagsalita nang dahil do'n. Gusto kong magpaliwanag pa pero ang hirap naman kasing i-explain ng sitwasiyon naming dalawa! Hindi kami magkaibigan lang pero wala rin naman talaga kaming relasiyon! Ano pang point ng pag-e-explain?!

"Ayos lang naman na magnobyo ka, anak. Dapat nga'y sa edad mo, may asawa't anak ka na. Kaya hayaan mo ang sarili mong maging masaya, hmm? Paminsan-minsan, hindi naman masamang ipakita ang totoong emosyon. Hindi ka magiging mahinang tao dahil do'n."

Ngumiti si Mama matapos sabihin 'yon bago umalis sa garden at pumasok sa loob ng bahay dala ang ibang mga ginamit. Ibinalik ko ang tingin sa table nila Papa. Sakto namang nakita ko si Hunter na nakatingin sa akin. Ngumiti siya nang magtama ang paningin namin. Gano'n na rin ang ginawa ko bago sinenyasan na papasok na sa loob para maghanda sa pagtulog.

Hindi ko na siya hinintay pang sumagot. Pumasok na ako sa loob at dumeretso sa kwarto ko sa itaas para maligo at magpalit ng pantulog. I wore my old hot pink pyjama and white fitted V-neck shirt. As I applied my night skin care, someone knocked on my door. I stood up and opened it, then I saw my mother with a pair of sleepwear for men while Hunter was behind her.

"Dito mo na patulugin si Hunter, akala ko kasi'y wala kang kasama kaya hindi ko nilinis ang guest room! Tamang-tama dahil malawak naman ang kama mo," paliwanag niya bago niyaya si Hunter papasok sa k'warto.

Kumabog naman ang dibdib ko bago inikot ang paningin sa loob ng k'warto. Mabuti na lang at walang kalat! Nakakainis talaga 'tong si Mama, nagdedesisyon na naman nang mag-isa!

"Mama, gusto mong matulog ako katabi siya?!" hindi makapaniwalang tanong ko.

Hunter was looking at me from head to toe with a smirk on his face. Napairap na lang ako sa kan'ya.

"Bakit naman hindi? Akala ko ba'y magkaibigan lang kayo? Bakit dati'y magkatabi naman kayong natutulog ni Leo, hindi ka naman nag-react ng gan'yan?"

Napaawang ang bibig ko bago napalingon kay Hunter dahil sa sinabi ni Mama. Kitang-kita ko ang pag-igting ng panga niya dahil do'n habang masama ang tingin sa akin.

"Sige na, maiwan ko na kayo. Paliguin mo na siya at nang mahimbing ang maging tulog."

Matapos sabihin ni Mama 'yon, ibinaba niya ang mga pantulog para kay Hunter saka lumabas ng k'warto. Naiwan kaming dalawa ni Hunter, hindi makapagsalita. God, I can't even look at him because of what I am feeling right now.

Hindi ito ang ini-imagine ko! Bwisit na 'yan, may pasok pa kami bukas, paano ako papasok niyan kung kasama ko siya? Ano? Sabay ba kaming papasok sa trabaho? Hindi pwede!

"Wow. Hindi ko alam ano muna dapat kong maramdaman matapos ng nakita at narinig ko ngayon," he said, breaking the awkward silence.

Napanguso ako bago bumalik sa pagkakaupo at saka itinuloy ang pag-a-apply ng skin care.

"Go and wash up. I'm going to sleep after this."

I heard him chuckle sarcastically. "Areeya . . . we're going to talk after."

After he said that, narinig ko na ang pagbukas ng pinto ng CR at ang pagsara nito. Nagmadali ako sa pag-apply ng skin care saka nahiga na kaagad. I shut my eyes tight so I could sleep immediately, para hindi niya ako maabutang gising pa.

Damn, I don't want to have sex here in my parent's house! I should really sleep!

But fuck . . . hindi ko na naririnig ang shower! Mukhang tapos na kaagad siyang maligo, pero gising pa rin ako. Bwisit naman!

Ilang sandali pa, narinig ko na ang pagbukas ng pinto. Mas lalo pa akong pumikit sa hindi ko maintindihang dahilan. Para tuloy akong tanga.

"You don't have to pretend you're fast asleep. You're not a good actress," he said.

Napabuntonghininga ako bago padabog na bumangon at tumingin nang masama sa kan'ya. 

"Are you drunk?"

He finished drying his hair with a towel before answering me. "I've never been this sober."

Tumango ako bago tumayo at kinuha ang susi ng kotse ko. "Let's go, then. Nasa place ko ang car mo, 'di ba? You have to go home. Kaya mo rin namang mag-drive, for sure. Tutal, sober ka naman."

He chuckled. "Why are you like this now? What scares you now to make me go home?"

I sighed. "May pasok tayo bukas. Paano tayo papasok sa kompanya mo? Sabay? Alam mong hindi p'wede 'yon."

Muli siyang tumawa bago kinuha ang susi ng kotse sa kamay ko saka ipinatong sa vanity table. Humarap siya sa akin saka nagsalita.

"We'll stay here. You're too beautiful tonight. Bukas na natin problemahin 'yang mga iniisip mo."

Wala na akong nagawa kung hindi hayaan na lang siya. Tama naman, bukas na lang ng umaga, tutal, maaga naman ako palaging nagigising sa tuwing nandito ako sa bahay ng mga magulang ko. Tinalikuran ko na si Hunter at pabalik na sana sa kama nang hinawakan niyaang palapulsuhan ko para pigilan. Napalunok ako nang makita ang malalim na pagtitig niya sa akin, pababa sa dibdib kong walang suot na bra. Nag-iwas ako ng tingin bago tumikhim.

"I . . . I can't do that here. I'm not comfortable having sex in my parents' house," I explained nervously. "If you want to do that, we need to leave this place tonight."

I heard his little sigh before pulling me closer. "Nope. I'm here to prove you wrong."

Napakunot-noo ako bago ibinalik ang tingin sa kan'ya. "Prove what wrong?"

"What you told Leo earlier." He looked at my chest once again before staring back at my face. "I can live without having sex with you. Just so you know."

Hindi ko man lang naitago ang dismaya ko dahil sa sinabi niya. Feeling ko tuloy, napahiya ako nang dahil do'n. I shouldn't have said that, tutal, the feeling is not mutual pala. Hindi kaya ng ego ko ang nararamdaman ko ngayon. Bwisit ka, Hunter! Hindi mo na sana ako itinama!

"But you know what I can't live without?" he added.

I rolled my eyes. "I don't car—"

He stopped me from answering by suddenly kissing me, sucking my mouth whole, as he wrapped his arms around my waist. I gave in immediately because for the whole day that we're together, I've been dying for his kisses . . . his touch. But I don't want to have sex here.

He sat on the edge of my bed and put me on his lap without breaking the kiss. He didn't remove my top. Instead, both of his hands went inside my shirt so he could play with my mounds. I slightly grinded on his now erected manhood to make him feel that I want him too.

"We're not doing it now," he said as his lips went to the side of my neck.

"W-Why . . ." I said in between my little moans.

"Because I'm proving you wrong . . ." he answered before his head went inside my shirt, sucking my right breast.

"I . . . I don't want you to prove me wrong." I removed my shirt and cupped his face. "I want you."

He nodded before claiming my lips again. I kissed him back with the same aggressiveness he's giving me before I make my hands travel down to his erected manhood. I started thrusting it up and down but he stopped me.

"No," he said.

"Why?"

He didn't answer. Instead, his hands went inside my pyjama and started wondering on my panties, making me gasp more and more.

"H-Hunter  . . . aahhh . . ."

I heard him sigh a little. "You should moan a little weaker or they will hear you," he commanded.

I nodded before shutting my eyes. Hunter covered my lips by kissing me hard as his fingers breaks inside me and started thrusting in and out of me. I buried my fingernails on his clothed back as he pulled me closer to him. After I come, he removed his hand from my pyjama and cleaned me with the wipes and tissues he got from my vanity table.

"H-How about you?" I asked.

He shook his head. "All I want is to sleep while hugging you. It's more than enough to pleasure me."

I smiled a little. Nagpalit ako ng damit na pantulog habang siya naman ay tahimik na pinanonood ako bago nahiga sa tabi niya. He made my head lay on his arms before hugging me tight. He gave me a three-second kiss before we closed our eyes to sleep.

"Hunter . . ."

"Hmm?"

I gulped because I was hesitant if I'm going to ask him this or not. Feeling ko mapapahiya na naman ako pero ano pang gagawin ko ngayon? Mas mainam nang malaman nang mas maaga kaysa patagalin pa ang pag-iisip ko.

"You're not . . . in love with me, right?"

I felt him stiffened. Maybe it was the question he never, ever, expected for me to ask. I waited for his answer but minutes passed, he didn't respond. So, I called his attention once again.

"Hunter?"

He hugged me tighter.

"Not yet."

My heart pounded. I don't want to be delusional but is he going to be? Will he stop himself from falling in love with me because it is against our contract?

"W-Will you stop yourself if that time comes?"

Again . . . silence.

I was about to take my question back when he kissed my temple and answer something that didn't answer my question.

"The answer was you, Areeya. You."

___

happy holidays, everyone! <3