Infidelity came with a thrill but the thrill also came with red lights, scares and self-loathe for the damage... and strain you're putting on your victims. At times, at most victims weren't even aware they were victims. It was selfish, the type to say 'as long as I'm enjoying the thrill of it all, I remain unbothered about the misery it planks down on your those involved' Infidelity is cruel, everyone looks down upon it until they're in the very same position. Everyone hates a cheater until they're the cheater. Hunter loathed men of that sort, he always proclaimed his hatred for cheaters. Hunter was now the cheater. It went hand in glove with his name. Cheaters hunt, making them a Hunter scavenging for the weak, naive and too hopeful. Soothing them with sweet words, at times soothing them with guilt and reverse psychology. When accused they'd have no option but to play victim. The more they did this, the white lies became easier and fell naturally from their lips. Guilt became easier to handle. Addiction comes in all forms, cheaters never change proves to be true because old habits die hard. Hunter had simply began, it was the classic case of 'just one cigarette, sniff, glass then never again'

The sudden dates, the sudden wanting to shower her with gifts, the sudden coming home early for supper, the sudden activeness in a bedroom that had been calm and relatively three to four times of lovemaking a month. It was all out of guilt. It was all trying to make up for a mistake his wife had not caught on. Trying to compensate for being a shitty person, a jerk in his own words and thoughts. He couldn't find a better word to describe his actions. He had persuaded and toyed with a student for four good months only to seem disinterested after they had sex. He had become the man he hated and shamed constantly. Hunter had always thought of himself to be different. It was in this moment that he realized, he wasn't; not at all. He was just another sleaze-bag who thought with the junk in his pants, as long as it led to a well deserved climax.

It had felt so odd sleeping with his wife after that night. It was... well just okay. His guilt wouldn't let him enjoy the pleasures of it all. He compared his wife to her... his mind could not help it. He loved his wife but the truth of the matter was... Karishma was younger, much more thrilling, eye popping, every other word imaginable. So was his wife a few years back. Perhaps it could have been his lack of experience with women of color, he had never once indulged on that side of the fence. Goodness his wife was beautiful, in his eyes she was ofcourse. Age was certainly catching up. Motherhood had its effects, motherhood would leave one not caring about their appearance anymore because all their concentration is on the child, their needs. Their constant needs, wants and nagging. Ever since Hailey's birth, he would get home to find his wife... with sunken eye bags and exhausted to do anything in bed. He wasn't one to complain, he would never blame that on his four months of committing adultery. He understood, being a mother was a full time job. He wouldn't be one to be an asshole and complain adding onto her already fully loaded pile of duties. At first, she lost her sex drive. Giving her time to heal, being patient and supportive... sex was never the same again. She just did not enjoy it no matter what he did. At times, he felt she was only having sex out of duty, for his sake otherwise; she'd rather not. He spent more time in the shower pleasing himself as the water ran distracting his groans. Hunter did not want to be a bother, he only assumed she would come around but she didn't. Rachel did not like sex as much and him begging for touch like a horny dog and constantly nagging...constricted their relationship. Hunter was starting to notice the cracks in his marriage. He had always compromised. He knew it wasn't her fault having a child came with so many hormonal changes.

What was the reason for cheating then?

It was— an impulsive bad decision. Knowing it's wrong. Trying your best to avoid it but it seems fate keeps putting you up for a challenge and eventually you decide... one try? Just one and before you know it, four months have passed and you really like the girl not just as a temporary penis warmer but as a person of interest. As a person... just as a person.   It became clear to him that he did not cheat because of her youth or innocence. She drew him in unknowingly. Her low glances, her shy respectful and admiration for him as an educator, her intelligence on world news and current events in fact any topic you name it, how openminded she always seemed, the unique mole right above her upper lip that made her look like some sort of Aphrodite. Her laugh—goodness—her laugh. Innocent and genuinely not forced. The way her eyes would almost close when she smiled too widely. Her nose crunched into a beautiful sight making her tiny nose ring more visible than usual. Her black silky hair that curtained the stupid grin she always had on when watching him distracted. Her right ear with not more than five piercings, it amazed him. He liked it. He remembered how she had told him that her next would be a belly ring. Smoothly, he had told her he would accompany her to hold her hand. She giggled, she always giggled at his every response. Deep down, he knew it.

That night he saw it. The glimmer in her hazel brown eyes as she moaned beneath him. She did not have to say a word. He was well aware that Karishma was in-love with him. He knew he was already in too deep the minute he came apart in her, with her breathing lowly below his chest. Her hair messy sprawled against the linen sheets. If crystals could shine like animation they would have in that moment shined in her eyes for him and all around her. In more ways than one, dismissing everything had been the safest card to play for her heart, for his sanity, for his marriage, for daughter. He wasn't sure, if he loved her, something was there but he loved his wife more than anything and anyone. He cared more for his wife. There was a reason why she wore his wedding band a promise he had made to her in-front of all their loved ones. His mind derailed immediately asking... 'Maybe because Kari wasn't at the end of the isle asking you to pick a side, if that had been the case... would you be married?'

"It's Karishma not Kari or Ari or love or sweetheart for fucks sake you idiot. Formality! Formality! Keep it formal. You can do this. It was just a fling. It meant nothing. Argh..." He said lowly staring at his reflection in the mirror as he continued to apply shaving cream. Frustrated with his thoughts.

—

Her tears ran down her cheeks just as the warm water from the shower cascaded from the top of her head down to the somewhat warm tiles. She felt used, she felt awful. She had told herself not to cry. She had told herself that was stronger than that. Karishma had tried her best to seem unbothered. College was all about having fun right? Well this was fun. Many people hooked up, had one night stands and forgot all about it the next day. Why was she so attached to this? If she saw it as a one night stand, it would prove to be easier. College was all about meeting new people, dates, sex, sex, sex, hook up culture, new experiences right? Wasn't that how it was always portrayed? She had done that, it felt surreal at the time but it didn't last long. She had went out of her comfort zone and decided to give it a chance. Give the tingles he gave her a chance. Give it all a chance, deep down she had said to hell with the wife! Deep down she wanted this man no matter how much it took. He made her feel so strongly regardless of her being in-denial. She had assumed the same but clearly not since he had been beating around the bush; about his intentions.

It wasn't suppose to hurt the way it did. She reminisced the past four months with him. It felt as if she had known him for much longer than just a couple of months. He had easily let her go, he had been so disrespectful towards her, he had been very rude. Karishma then started to realize perhaps he lied, there was never a divorce all along. He had been playing with her feelings, playing her for a fool. Now that he had been intimate with her, there was no longer a bargain. She found it hard to believe that she had been the only student he had ever been involved with. There had to have been others maybe he did this often. Vulture on the naive and warm hearted. Scavenging on those still hopeful and those who believe in love. She didn't cry too hard, she didn't cry too much. As she wrapped a towel around her body; she put on a good joyful look on her face. Her roommate was sleeping but Karishma did not want to let it slip through the cracks that something like this had happened. She would never let anyone know of her relationship with him or whatever it was. It was horrid having to ignore the little feelings she had grown for him. She'd never admit to herself that maybe she did not just like him, it felt bigger than that. Distracted, she always found herself thinking about that night.

—

On his side of the bed, were his drawers. They usually contained random stuff but she knew her husband always kept multiple unread novels in there. He was a reader at heart, but lately he never had time to do so. She would always steal his current reads for her own enjoyment especially when she'd watch him get dressed early in the morning as she laid back on the continental pillows. He also always had all sorts of candy in there. Rachel looked a little confused as she stared at the box that contained foul packets of what she knew as condoms. Curiosity got the best of her, it was a box of twelve but three were missing. Why had she even counted giving herself such unneeded anxiety. Hearing the shower come to a halt, she knew he'd spend a bit more time shaving and humming along to his favorite song of the moment. It differed every week. Rachel jumped across the bed to her side and pretended to be awake on her phone. Her husband then got out of the shower, a towel wrapped around his lower body. Routinely, he came around the bed to kiss her 'good morning' but that morning; he simply greeted from afar and headed for the closet. For a second Rachel decided perhaps she should be quiet about it. It was probably nothing but they hadn't used condoms since the birth of Hailey when she got an IUD copper as birth control. It bothered her but she did not want to overthink it. Maybe he just had them there just Incase. Fumbling with buttoning his blue shirt. Hunter looked around then proceeded to text her. 

We need to talk. H

Turned out to be a horrid idea. For two lovers who had not seen each other in nearly a week and a half. The tension and unsaid feelings mounted. It was one of the many failed attempts to talk or have any sort of formality. As she clung onto his ruffled shirt allowing him to take her on his mahogany desk in the privacy of his office. His black slacks down to his ankles, the metal buckle of his belt hit the table below with each thrust. Lowly groaning in her ear, she whimpered helplessly muffling her cries against his shoulder surely making his shirt with a wet patch. Trying to silence each other they kissed with urgency. It was rough but calm and wanting. She bit on lower lip every time he hit the right spot. The sound that escaped her lips brought him to a brink of ecstasy. He cursed the day he met her, thoughts of how he would ever stop ran across his mind. How was he expected to forget her? Look at her? Just fucking look at her— he asked himself as he watched her cum apart, he pulled away to watch her eyes closed and lips pursued as her thighs shook and she tightened around him. Slowing opening her eyes, she found him watching. There was a noticeable smirk... she quickly pushed him off as realization came back to her.

He didn't say a word as he pulled his pants up and tucked in his shirt rolled the used condom in a tissue throwing it in the bin that sat at the corner; full of ruffled papers. The smell of fresh indulgence sat amongst them.

"You must think, I'm stupid." She muttered lowly getting dressed.

"No, I don't."

"You called me to talk, then you tell me you miss me, kiss me and I immediately fall for it. I'm stupid." Karishma said heaving a sigh, her eyes glazed with iciness. Not the waterfall, she thought as she blinked it away.

"It's not my fault neither is it your fault that we're this attracted to each other. It wasn't my intention. It genuinely wasn't."

"Well good thing it's over." She mumbled.

"Look Karishma, don't blame yourself for this. You had a somewhat okay but bad first experience, I happen to give you your first enjoyable sexual experience. It's only normal that your body would react in the way it did at my touch." Hunger paused, also you're inlove with me. He didn't say it. "I'm not trying to be boastful neither did I do this knowingly. I'm not taking advantage of your weakness for me... if anything you make me just as weak and I lack the very same sexual control."

"My weakness for you? You're very boastful. Stop trying to sound humble. Gave me my first real sexual experience? You're sound so proud." Karishma mocked. "It seems you have so much experience you do this often...?"

"...no... I don't..."

"Yeah right, I'm student number what on your list of many others?" Clearing his throat, Hunter walked towards her. She moved away. "Since you know that my body has a soft spot for you... it's best you stand at least five meters away from me. Thank you."

"Fine with me." He raised his arms defensively. "Look I'm already late for a 3pm class. We spent nearly thirty minutes not doing any talking. Perhaps you could wait for me... our usual place and time?"

Hesitant, his green eyes seemed to have been silently pleading with her.

"Alright."

"Alright then love." He said approaching her to lowly give her a kiss on the cheek. She shivered at his touch. She felt embarrassed, it was clear enough that he knew the effect he had and left on her.

30 votes + 20 comments
— Stay safe x —