Chapter 25: There's no love like the first...party!

Chris Donovan vs. Shane Lewis

It's party time....

Video: Somebody To Love by Queen

Enjoy!

***

"You sure they can pull it off?" Dean murmured, absently rubbing his hand on his wife, Kayla's bulging tummy whilst watching the children arrange themselves for the show.

"I hear they're good so let's hope they can." Shane laughed.

So far Adele's party had been a blast. Shane's estate was huge and Pamela, the party planner, had made good use of the vast space. She had actually transformed the place into a mini Disneyland with all its perks. There were different shapes and sizes of bouncing castles, trampolines, mini racing cars, ponies, assorted games, clowns, a comedian, and lots and lots of sweets, drinks and food. Since the theme for the party was Disney's Lillo & Stich, each kid received an Aloha welcome item on arrival, connecting them to the theme. Some had on L&S beanies, slippers, bracelets, grass skirts, leis, glasses, watches, hats and some even held cute L&S bags. Every kid and most of the moms had tropical fern leaf headbands on their heads and lei around their necks, depicting the Hawaiian setting of Lillo & Stich. There were Aloha banners everywhere and even the cups, plates and tissues had ALOHA printed on them. The kids loved it. They oohed and aahed over the giant L&S birthday cake and even danced like a train around the cake, with the birthday girl in lead. Of course the grown-ups had their own set up but they loved mingling with the kids and generally, being kids themselves for a change.

Adele's teacher said her class was putting together a play in which they were to sing Queen's 'Somebody To Love'. So the kids in Adele's class, were going to perform the song for the grown-ups. Seeing as the arrangement of that song was rather complicated, the grown-ups, though excited to hear the kids sing, were expecting the worst.

"Maybe we should bet on it or something." Matt murmured, earning an elbow to his side from his fiancée, Jen.

Every member of the squad was there with their wives, fiancées and in Tyron's case, no one. But Tyron was having too much fun to even notice he was the only single person amongst his pals. At least he was enjoying the full attention of the beautiful Briana, Cole's fiancée. Soon Adele's teacher was introducing the group and urging everyone to enjoy their performance. And what a performance it was. The children sang well and danced exceptionally well too. And when they got to the part where they were all chanting... 'Find me somebody to love', everyone joined in, singing and clapping. It was a really enthralling performance from such little kids. And after their performance, the applauds were thunderous.

Adele ran to hug her mother and Sam, and then dashed for where Shane and Chris sat amongst the squad. She gave them each really tight hugs, enjoying their praises. Before she turned around to go, she stopped and squealed excitedly when she saw Michael.

"Doctor Michael." Adele jumped into Michael's outstretched arms.

"You were spectacular out there, Adele." Michael said, kissing her on the cheeks.

"Thank you." She said and skipped off to where her Grandma Sylvia sat. She climbed into a beaming Sylvia Lewis' lap and coiled her little arms around her neck, drawing smiles and chuckles from the people around.

"You have a really lovely daughter Shane." Kayla turned to smile at Shane. "Don't allow Chris to corrupt her." She added with a teasing smile. "He's insane."

"More insane than your husband?" Tristan gushed with mock surprise, staring at Kayla with wide eyes.

"Tristan..." Dean growled warningly whilst the others laughed.

"I'm outta here." Tristan laughed, pulling Briana off Tyron's lap. "Come on girl. Let's go dance."

"Kyle, can I talk to you for a moment please?" Shane asked, getting off his chair and giving Chris a quick kiss. "Be right back." He whispered.

"Sure." Kyle stood and fell into step beside Shane. They soon disappeared to a secluded part of the huge estate. "Sup man?" Kyle asked, folding his arms across his chest.

"I need your help, Kyle." Shane started wearily.

Shane couldn't help but feel like out of the guys, Kyle didn't really like him. The man sort of stayed out of his way whenever they were together. Kyle had been pleasant to him at Damon's house but hadn't been as welcoming as the others. He'd noticed the same cool attitude at Adele's party too but Shane somehow felt Kyle was the only person who could help with what he was going through at that point.

"Listen, I know you guys share everything so Chris has probably told you I've booked to see Dr. Murray." Shane said quietly.

"He hasn't." Kyle said evenly.

"Oh..." Shane raised a brow in surprise. "Well, I have. I'm to see him next week Tuesday." Shane seemed not to know how to say what was on his mind after giving that piece of information. He went quiet and looked at Kyle, who gave a slight shrug.

"So? What do you want from me?" Kyle asked.

Shane gave a deep sigh. "Look, I know you don't like me but..."

"Whoa... Hold it right there." Kyle said coolly. "What makes you think that?" He asked, his face blank.

"I'm not an idiot." Shane shrugged. "I just know you don't. I don't know why though."

"Before we continue with that, where does Murray fit into all this?" Kyle unfolded his arms and stuck his hands into his back pockets.

"I need to talk to someone so Chris recommended him." Shane said. "He said he helped you and Aaron work out some problems so he can..."

"Are you guys having problems?" Kyle asked.

"No. No, we're not. I've just been advised...I know I have to talk to someone because of my...childhood problems."

"With Chris." It wasn't a question.

Shane nodded. "I'm just not comfortable talking to people. I've never had to tell anyone what goes on inside my head. And I don't know what to expect." Shane squeezed the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Since you've...consulted this doctor before, I just wanted to know... fuck." Shane swore as he tried to put his thoughts together. "Can he help?" Shane looked so worried and confused, Kyle felt sorry for him.

"Did Chris tell you the reason why Aaron and I had to see Murray?" Kyle asked quietly.

"No." Shane shook his head. "He just said the man did a good job with you guys."

Kyle went quiet for a moment. "I've vowed to myself not to tell anyone this. But I know you've been through a lot so I'm going to make an exception." Kyle took a step closer to Shane. "Aaron raped me."

"Oh my God." Shane gasped, his eyes going wide.

"Not to make excuses for him but, he wasn't himself. Was under the influence of drugs. Had taken them for the very first time. We were having problems. Me, being my usual bossy self and he...let's just say he wasn't used to taking shit from anyone." Kyle smiled. "So he went out with some guys, got smashed and then...well you know the rest. I was...I was devastated. I still loved him, God help me, I did. But I had so much anger inside, it was eating me up. His situation was even worse.  All that self-loathing was destroying him. We had to do something. Murray is one hell of a shrink. Trust me on that. He'll help you."

"Fuck." Shane breathed. "Thanks for telling me. I appreciate it. Now I feel better about going to see him. I just hope he can help my case as he did yours."

Kyle nodded. "I don't dislike you, Shane." Kyle said softly. "I just have a feeling you will hurt Chris. Maybe not intentionally, but..." He shrugged.

"I love him, Kyle." Shane breathed.

"I know. But if someone hurts you as badly as Chris did, you unconsciously hit back. It happened to Aaron and I. I hurt him and he unconsciously reacted by doing what he did. But what makes your case more dangerous is the fact that Chris fucked with you when you were a kid. You've had to virtually live your whole life with that pain and hate. The day you will explode..." Kyle shook his head slowly. "It won't be pretty. Dude, you're a fucking ticking bomb...no offense."

"None taken." Shane responded.

"I fear for my friend." Kyle moved closer to Shane. "You see, the guy is so in love with you he virtually looks like he's under a spell. And because of what he did to you, he feels so guilty he'll quietly take any shit you'll give him. I'm sure even you can see that, that's a hell of a dangerous combination. If you hurt him in any way, no one can pick up the pieces. And that's scary." Kyle whispered, and then stepped back from Shane. "So no, I don't dislike you but I can't also shake off the feeling that you're going to hurt him real bad. And that's driving me crazy."

"Wow!" Shane breathed. "Chris is not the only one who feels that strongly about this relationship, Kyle. Even when I blamed him for all the pain I had to go through in life, I never stopped loving him. I know you'll find that hard to believe but...it's the truth. I don't want to hurt Chris in any way. That is why I've finally decided to see a shrink. That should count for something, right?"

"Yeah it does. And I'm happy you're doing that." Kyle murmured and went quiet for a while, both men lost in thought. "Is he seeing Murray too?" Kyle asked quietly.

Shane nodded. "He says he will."

"Good. That's the right thing to do. Listen, I know you feel fear. But know that such anxiety is a normal part of our lives, and lets us know that what we're about to embark on is indeed a scary journey of self-discovery. Learning things about yourself is not always all joy and butterflies."

"I'm not looking forward to it." Shane muttered.

"I understand. But sometimes our demons need to come out as well, or those behaviors we almost wish nobody in the world knew about. So instead of fighting these feelings, it's best to just accept them as a part of the process. That acceptance becomes one of the very first steps of not only getting help, but also the psychotherapeutic process of change. Because without making changes in your life, you're not only going to feel bad sometimes, you may end up hurting the people you love."

"I know."

"The therapist isn't there to judge you, Shane." Kyle said softly. "Neither is he there to tell you how screwed up he thinks you are. His main job is to simply listen to you, and help you straighten some things out in your life. So feel confident and tell him your story.  He'll simply want to hear what the current problem is and where it all started. Of course in your case, he will ask you a bit about your childhood and family background, just to understand your development a little better. You have to focus on what's most important to you and try and stick to it. That will help address your immediate needs."

"What if I forget some important stuff?" Shane asked looking intrigued.

Kyle chuckled. "You'll leave your first session thinking you left out something important. Don't let that worry you 'cause it's something you can always talk about in your next session. It's a chance to explore new ways of being, of thinking, of feeling and..." But Kyle trailed off when both men heard Tyron's voice.

"Yo Shane." The six' four, sexy blue-eyed, hunky Navy Seal called out. "I've gotta bounce. Been called to an emergency meeting." Tyron was with Aaron and Chris.

"It's a holiday, Ty." Kyle groaned.

"Which part of 'emergency' don't you understand?" Tyron laughed, drawing Kyle into his arms for a hug. "Let's hope they'll smell the alcohol on my breath and excuse me." He laughed, drawing a snort form Kyle.

"Hey, thanks for inviting us to the party." Tyron said, giving Shane a one-armed bro hug. "I had a blast. And that daughter of yours is adorable."

Shane grinned. "Pleasure was all mine, man. Thanks for coming." Shane said, turning to look at Kyle as he drew Aaron into his arms.

Tyron was talking to Chris so Shane continued to look at Kyle and Aaron. He didn't have to be a genius to notice how much those two loved each other. He watched as Kyle nibbled Aaron's bottom lip till Aaron moaned softly. Then Kyle teased Aaron's mouth open with his tongue and expertly kissed him senseless, right there in front of them. It wasn't a peck or a short kiss like Shane would have expected. It was a full on mouth fucking.

Chris turned around to look at the couple when he heard the moans. "Hey, cut it out, Kyle. There are kids around." Chris admonished Kyle as Tyron smirked and turned to go, promising to call the guys to let them know if he could come back to the party. "Yeah, do that Ty." Chris responded to Tyron and moved to where Kyle and Aaron stood with their lips still locked on each other's. "Come here, Aaron." Chris said, pulling Aaron from Kyle's arms and into his. "You guys done talking? 'Cause I can take this trouble maker away to enable you two get right back to it." He said looking down into Aaron's completely befuddled face.

"Let me go, Chris." Aaron groaned, drawing a chuckle from Shane and a longing smile from Kyle.

"No I won't." Chris retorted, pressing a soft kiss against Aaron's forehead. "Come on. See you guys later." He called out as he walked away with a whining Aaron.

Shane patiently waited as Kyle followed Aaron with his eyes till Aaron and Chris rounded a corner and disappeared from sight. Shane had to make an effort to suppress his smile. Kyle obviously had it real bad for his man.

"Listen Kyle, I really do appreciate everything." Shane told an almost giddy-looking Kyle. "I'm glad we had this talk."

"Sure. Just let yourself go when you deal with Murray. Remember, he's not there to judge you. Don't hold anything back. Okay?"

"Okay." Shane said.

Kyle smiled. "You've got nothing to lose, man. You are not doing this for anyone...not even for Chris. You're doing it for yourself, alright?"

"Thanks Kyle." Shane nodded. "You've been a lot of help. Aaron is a lucky man."

"So are you, Shane. Trust me on that. Chris is the best."

"I know." Shane smiled.

"Good. Call me whenever you wish to talk okay?"

"Will do. And I promise not to hurt Chris. Not if I can help it." Shane gave a grin that lit his eyes.

"I'll accept that." Kyle laughed, stretching his hand to shake on it. Then both men went to rejoin their friends, both feeling a sense of relief.

***

The party continued deep into the night even after all the kids had gone home. It became a grown-up affair, with everybody having a good time. They danced to some really good tunes, with Briana forcing Shane onto the dance floor. Tyron came back with the news that he was being sent out on a mission the following Monday. He didn't know how long he was going to be away and didn't even know exactly where he was going. He therefore wanted to party hard with his boys.

"Wherever you're sent off to, make sure you fucking come back alive." Damon growled.

"And come back healthy otherwise I'm going to send you off permanently with cyanide in some cough syrup or something." Michael added, making everyone laugh.

"Going with that bitch you spoke about?" Chris asked dryly.

"No." Tyron gave a small smile.

"Still a bitch?" Chris asked with a cocked eyebrow at Tyron. He didn't trust that smile. He knew his friend too well.

"Oh I forgot to tell you." Tyron gave a grin that looked like the cat that ate the canary. "She's...let's just say she's really good."

"Oh damn, he cleared it." Chris bellowed, making all the guys burst into laughter.

"Put it up there buddy." Matt slapped his palm against Tyron's. "That's what I'm talking about."

"At least unlike some people, I didn't clear it in a restroom." Tyron grinned, making the guys laugh even harder. "The armory was perfect."

"Oh my God." Shane gasped despite himself and dropped his face into his palm, having a pretty good idea where this was going. He could however not stop the laughter that shook his frame. God, these guys were nuts, he thought.

"Err...who fucked who in a restroom?" Aaron asked with curiosity written all over his face.

"Dude, you fucked Kyle in the full glare of people so shut up." Damon laughed.

"Well, in our defense, we were both porn stars at the time...well, I was. This idiot was only pretending." Aaron retorted, pointing his thumb in Kyle's direction. "And how about you Damon? Huh? Remember Kyle and Ken's party and that blowjob?" By that point, the guys were screaming with laughter.

"Oh, not to forget the plane to...was it Paris? And the conference call that ended in a lustful cumfest." Chris drawled.

"Looks like all of you fools are into some voyeuristic shit." Cole muttered, downing his half-filled glass of scotch.

"And how about you, Oh mighty Cole?" Michael retorted. "Remember..." But Michael got cut off when Briana quickly ran to him and covered his mouth with her hand.

"Michael, please shut up." Briana gasped, blushing so hard. "Please." She obviously knew what Michael had been about to say, and couldn't allow it.

The guys had a field day at that telling reaction from Briana. And even when a laughing Cole tried to pull Briana away from Michael, she wouldn't let go. Michael eventually wrapped his arms around Briana, whispering into her ear that he wouldn't tell on her. The guys didn't think it was necessary to worsen the blushing beauty's woes by admitting that they already knew what Michael had been about to say.

"You're all idiots." Kayla laughed, getting up from her chair slowly and tiredly.

"Sweetheart, don't even go there." Cole smirked at Kayla, who was also his PA. "For your information, I've fixed a camera in my kitchen. So next time you and Dean decide to have unbridled sex in there, know that I'll be selling the tape to the highest bidder."

"Yayyyy," the guys roared in unison, breaking into riotous laughter.

Kayla turned to give her laughing husband a mock stern look. But their laughter was so infectious she couldn't maintain that look for long. She broke into a full-fledged fit of laughter.

"Cole, you're a jerk." Kayla laughed as she waddled over to where Shane sat.  "Shane, I have to go." Kayla said to Shane, who had gotten to his feet.  "It was really nice meeting you." She hugged him and kissed him on the cheek. "Welcome to the crazy club." She whispered to him.

"Thanks." Shane laughed. "And it was a pleasure having you here, Kayla."  

Kayla gave Tyron a fierce hug. "Take care of yourself, Ty."

"I will, Drill Sergeant." Tyron replied teasingly, using the name the squad usually called Kayla due to her bossy nature. "And...finish hard." He said, pointing at her huge bulge.

"I will." Kayla groaned. "Goodnight." She called out to everyone in general.

There were choruses of goodnight from everyone.  "And try to be nice to the husband." Michael chipped in. "Give him some."

"Yeah. Put the idiot out of his misery." Matt shouted. "He's dying of blue balls. After all, the baby is in your stomach and not your..."

The guys laughed as both Dean and Kayla flipped them off. "Mary, do me a favour will you?" Dean told Mary, who was coming back to the party after going to drop off the kids. "Let your husband sleep on the couch tonight please."

"For you, anything darling." Mary grinned, hugging Kayla and kissing Dean on both cheeks. "Michael, you're on the couch tonight." She screamed, earning cheers from the guys.

"Ow come on." Michael groaned. "I wasn't the only one who spoke. Matt..."

"Is sleeping on the couch too." Jen, Matt's fiancée chipped in. They guys laughed their heads off at the look on Matt's face.

They had a great time. By the time the last guest left, Shane and Chris were tired. Sylvia Lewis had retired earlier. And Lizzie had gone home with Adele because apart from the fact that she'd missed her daughter, Adele wanted to start opening her numerous presents. 

"Shit, I have some stuff I have to work on." Chris muttered when they finally entered Shane's bedroom.

"Can't it wait till tomorrow?" Shane asked, turning to face Chris.

"I'll sleep better if I sort it out." Chris responded, drawing a groan from Shane.

"Do you know how much effort it took for me not to do anything scandalous at the party today?" Shane asked gruffly.

"Effort?"

"Uh-huh. It took a lot of my will power not to launch and kiss the fucking shit outta you, right there in front of everyone." Shane rasped. "And if I don't do it this very instant, I'll go insa..."

Chris cut off Shane's tirade with his hot lips, kissing him not just passionately, but fiercely. He pushed Shane backwards till they fell on the bed. Then Chris slipped a hand between them and quickly released their rapidly hardening cocks from the confines of their pants. Then without letting go of Shane's mouth, Chris stroked their cocks together. Both men were gushing out so much precum Chris didn't need to reach for lube. When he squeezed their mushroomed heads together, Shane tore his mouth away with a broken moan.

"Oh fuck, do that again." Shane gasped. "I can feel it all the way to my toes."

And Chris did it again and again in between stoking those huge erections, the friction of feeling their cocks against each other's, so mouth-wateringly good.

"Fuck, I'm gonna come." Chris moaned.

"Same here." Shane whispered and drew Chris' mouth to his, just as they both exploded, writhing with pleasure against each other.

Chris brought his hand from between them and cradled Shane's head between his hands, neither minding the fact that Chris' hand was wet with their essence. They proceeded to kiss each other senseless, coming up for air only when it became very necessary.

"Fuck." Chris muttered as he rolled off Shane to lie beside him. "That was..."

"Amazing." Shane breathed. "Damn, I needed that." He laughed. "Now you can go do your work."

"Fuck you." Chris laughed. "I'm not going anywhere. You have no idea how many times I had to stop myself from pulling you away to have my way with you." Chris breathed.  "That arse! Fuck, I want more."

Shane laughed, getting off the bed and reaching for Chris' hand to pull him up. Then they headed for the bathroom for a much needed shower. And in the shower, they gave each other hot earth-shaking blowjobs, both crying out in blissful abandon when they reached completion. Back in bed, Shane got into his favourite position, dropping tiny kisses against Chris' chest whilst enjoying the feel of Chris' hand rubbing his back soothingly.

"I spoke to Kyle about Dr. Murray." Shane said quietly. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you but...I just wanted to talk to someone who has dealt with the man. The thought of talking about my innermost personal fears, thoughts, and feelings and see exactly how screwed up I really am, with a complete stranger is..."

"I understand, Shane." Chris said softly, pressing a kiss against Shane's head.

"He told me about...him and Aaron's problem." Shane said softly and felt Chris tense up against him, his rubbing hand stopping its movement on his back. "He only told me to reassure me that if Dr. Murray was able to help them, he would be able to help me too." Shane whispered, promptly heaving a sigh of relief when Chris' hand resumed its movement.

"Was he okay after?" Chris asked hoarsely.

"Well, that was before that hot kiss he shared with Aaron so I guess he was okay." Shane murmured. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I'm good." Chris breathed, meeting Shane halfway when Shane tilted his head up for a kiss. It was a soft sweet kiss.

Shane placed his head back on Chris' chest and sighed. "I'm scared, Chris." Shane's voice was scarcely a whisper, but Chris heard it.

Chris tightened his arm around Shane, wishing he could take away all Shane's fears and pain and protect him from everything negative. "It's okay to be scared. Will you feel better if I come to your sessions with you?" Chris asked softly.

Shane went quiet for a while. Was it advisable to go together with Chris? After all, all he was probably going to say was about Chris. Wouldn't that rather put a strain on their relationship? Was it even advisable to let Chris know how much he loathed him at times, back then? But then they had already spoken about how he felt hadn't they, Shane asked himself. Chris knew how he'd felt about him before the unfortunate incident, how he'd felt after, and how he felt now, right? So what was the big deal if Chris had to sit through all that he had to say?

"I want you to come with me." Shane said quietly.

"Let's see how it goes alright? If Dr. Murray says it's okay, I'll be there with you, I promise."

"Okay. Thanks." Shane pressed a kiss on Chris' chest.

"I love you, Shane." Chris said softly. "Nothing will change that. Certainly not you saying how much you hated me. This is for eternity baby."

All Shane could do was nod, not trusting himself to speak around the huge lump in his throat. He felt so lucky to have Chris in his life and he knew everything was going to be alright. Shane wouldn't have it any other way.

***

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