Cody's POV

James and I race side by side around the massive lake, doubling back once we reach the edge of Rouge territory.

The late Saturday afternoon sun gleams in the water to the left of us, enforcing a strong love I've always had for our parklands.

James lunges towards me, trying to trip me up and knock me off balance to gain the lead, but his mana shadow gives him away, moving a fraction of a second than he does, giving me enough time to maneuver out of the way. James growls in frustration as I zip away from him, my speed allowing me to stay out of range for attacks and other dirty tricks.

As much as it annoys James to no end, these abilities will come in handy when the Pack Run starts in five days.

We continue racing and training, and eventually even decide to jump in the water when the sun finally gets high enough in the sky. I watch in embarrassed awe as James strips down to his underwear, his bronze skin glistening beautifully under the sun, his abs toned and flexing as he pulls his shirt over his head.

I see him catch me looking and I quickly turn away, pulling my own shirt over my head, clearing my throat out of nerves as I take in my own muscles, much smaller than my Alpha. I always learned that as an Omega I am essentially built for speed, agility and whatever natural ability I'm born with, power and strength not on the list of priorities for us Omegas. So even with my abs and my own muscles form, it's excruciatingly unimpressive compared to James.

But after I pull my shorts down and turn towards the Lake, I find James staring at me openly, his entire face blushed and his mouth open as if in awe. His eyes hold something dear and pure that makes me look away, a soft blush spreading over me at the intense look in his eyes that almost leaves me breathless.

The way he looks at me doesn't make me feel an less sexy.

I feel Jessie paying attention, a silent longing filling me to the brim and I bite my lip to stop myself from doing something stupid.

We jump into the water and do a few laps, racing through the slightly chilled water, our arms cutting through the surface like swift blades. We train until our arms and legs feel like jelly and our toes and fingers are all pruney from being in the water.

When we finally pull ourselves up onto the shore we're almost gasping for air, throwing ourselves down onto the blanket a few feet away.

I can tell by the sun that it's a little past four, the days slowly getting longer, sunset closer to seven now.

As we fry off and eat, I find my mind preoccupied by the daunting homework assignment that's at the pack house, the first part of which is due this Wednesday.

The last time I tried to read about my family it only threw me back into the last moments of their life, reminding my of my failure and the fact that I got the fortune of living through the hell of staying behind.

"Cody?!" With a start I realize I was zoned out, James sitting there looking a little confused and concerned.

Embarrassment has a chokehold on me and I finally just give up, falling backwards onto the ground, covering my eyes with my arm, craving the sweet release of nothingness so my mind didn't terrify me with my own thoughts and worries.

"Cody, what's going on? You can talk to me about it if you want. I know I haven't gone through what you have, but I understand how it feels to have no one to talk to. I'm here for you. Whenever you need." James tells me softly, the wind carrying his words to caress my ears softly.

I don't know if it's because I couldn't see him, or because I was starting to believe we were Soulmates, or just because he always knows exactly what to say, but I start talking. Almost as if a dam broke, my words flow out of me. "I have this homework assignment in Mental Health Studies where I'm supposed to research my family history and see if there's any Mental Illnesses that we have in our history." I start, my chest squeezing at the mere mention of them, but I keep my eyes close even as I feel James move closer, his aura visible to me even behind the barrier. "I tried to look through the folder I got, but as soon as I saw their names and pictures, it was like I was there all over again." I take a deep breath and say aloud what I haven't had to in almost seven years. "When I was eleven years old, my parents and sister were murdered by Rogues that had tried to get information from my parents. They're gone and I'm still alive. All because my sister and my wolf forced me to live." The last sentence is said so bitterly I almost spit it out, my lip curling in hurt and anger.

There's a few minutes of silence where I almost declare that I take it back, wishing I could shove my naked, candid words back inside my mouth.

But right as I go to attempt that feat, James responds, his voice low but understanding.

"I can't imagine what that must have been like. It must have sucked to live sometimes, huh?" He asks me, a smile audible in his voice. Grateful that he understands , my shoulder relax a little as we continue talking.

"Yeah. Sometimes I wasn't sure I would make it to see my 18th birthday." I tell him and again I find myself confessing something I've kept to myself for years. "I feel like I'm a wolf failure sometimes. I can't even acknowledge Jessie, much less look his soul in the eye and merge as a team. I try, but all that comes is rage and pain. I hate him." Shame washes over me but the truth in my words is raw and fleeting, barring my soul to someone who could lock me away for damning my wolf in such a way.

"I know you probably expect me to be the last person to understand, but there's a lot about me you don't know. Which you probably should if you're going to be the love of my life." He laughs dryly and I can't help the warmth that spreads through me especially as I feel him sit next to me, our legs touching softly spreading goosebumps along my skin. "My father, the current Alpha was always old school in his teachings and beliefs. So much so that my feminine clearly gay wolf was a problem for him and the way that Alpha's are supposed to be. I always got in trouble for not reigning in Sloan, my wolf always so carefree and flamboyant. At first I hated him for it because he got to go and hide while I had to deal with dad. But over time I saw he protected me as much as he could and I started to protect him in return. But it took a long time for that anger to go away." There's no judgement in his words just a certain wisdom that comes with going through something yourself.

I listen to his words and file away all the little tidbits of information he feeds me, bathing on his attention and his compassion, drunk on his kindness and lack of expectations.

I don't even have to open my eyes to feel the now familiar tingling sensation of my mana aura coming to life, the warm feeling of it intertwining with James' filling me with a sense of happiness I wish I could bottle and drink.

Sitting here with James, I don't notice the way the sun baked my skin a few degrees too warm for my liking. Or the way some blades of grass prick my neck. The usually overwhelming sound of nature a distant whisper compared to all that I feel when I'm with James.

Silently, oh so carefully in the safety of my mind with Jessie as a silent, aching witness, I take the fragile dream of being with James and accept it into my heart. Willing it, inwardly whispering my first prayer since my family was snatched from my life.

I know I may not be worthy to be the Luna of this pack. And I know I'm no where near worthy enough to have someone as amazing and selfless as James be my Soulmate.

But even still, I pray, with everything I have, that it's true. That my sentence of solitude and despair finally come to an end.

"It used to be because I hated him." My voice is barely a whisper but I know he hears me, the soft lapping of the lake the only other noise besides the wind shuffling through the trees. "I hated him so much because he listened to Casey when she told us to run. I should have been there with them when they died. I should be with them in the Eternal Forrest not still here suffering for years alone. Fuck, I was so alone. But over time the hate went away and all that was left was pure unfiltered unrealized grief that seemed to overtake me every time I even thought of them. It was excruciating. Like I was being tortured every day. It was always the worst first thing in the morning. I would smell someone cooking breakfast in the pack kitchen and just for a second, I would forget that I was the only wolf orphan in the pack. And then it would slam into me all over again. Eventually it even got to the point that talking to Jessie was too much. I just kept remembering the last moments he got to share with Casey that terrified but grateful look in her eye. As if she could die in peace. It's gut wrenching."

The silence is heavy like the weight of my tears as they roll down my face and slash into the ground underneath me. I hurriedly wipe at my face, hating the feeling of the quick to chill tears dripping down and into my ears.

I almost scream when I feel James' warm hand rest on my leg, granting me a comforting squeeze that echos in my heart.

"I get it, Cody. But eventually you're going to have to accept what happened, process what you've been through and bridge the connection between you and Jessie. The problem is you keep trying to resist what's already happened. Life moves on and eventually you do too." His words are soft and caring but they don't sting any less. A part of me wants to yell at him, toss his hand off of me and tell him off, spitting at him that he doesn't know a fucking thing.

But he does.

I just don't want to admit it.

Before I can respond though, he continues, giving me some advice that I didn't realize I need.

"How about this, tomorrow, I can take you to Vilin to see a head doctor, you know they have the best. You can take your folder and have them read it to you. That way the pressure is off of you, you get your homework done and learn a bit more about the people that sacrificed themselves for you. Let me take you tomorrow." He offers and after a few seconds hesitation, I nod before removing the arm from over my eyes and sitting up, almost coming face to face with James. I had thought he was facing my feet, but as I come to sit up, I find our noses a mere inch apart.

I immediately go still, my breath catching in my throat as my eyes dart around, unsure where to land. His eyes are too intense, his lips too tempting, the trees too obvious.

Instead of leaning in, I watch with a surprising amount of disappointment as James goes to open his mouth and say something.

"Do you think I could meet him? Jessie, I mean. Just for a moment?" The questions catches me so off gaurd it steals my breath away.

At first I'm upset but after a moment, I get it. He's hoping as hard as I am. And with that hope comes the bonds that we have with our wolves and them with each other. A tangled web of love and support and attention. One that has always seemed impossible until now.

But in order to have faith you also have to have actions towards the goal you want.

"Yes." I surprise everyone with that answer, but I don't give myself time to think about it or change my mind before I force myself into the unfamiliar feeling of fading into the background of consciousness.

✨✨✨✨✨

Jessie's POV

For the first time in almost seven year, I open my eyes and see the world through first person POV, the wind through my hair and sun on my skin.

I almost want to cry, emotions crashing through me faster than I can process them.

But when I turn my head and find the most beautiful man in the world, the wind is almost knocked from me. I don't know how Cody has missed it, or if like many things in his life, he overlooked it, but the burning need and pull towards James is almost staggering.

His chocolate brown eyes and head of loose curls and pink soft lips call to me, begging me to touch them and relish them, committing them all to memory.

"You're beautiful." The words escape my before I can stop them but I don't care, going up on my knees to look at him closer. I look deep into his eyes and catch a glimpse of his wolf, soft and lovely before it's gone, leaving him a mystery for another day.  James is staring up at me in awe and disbelief along with what looks like confusion. His high cheekbones are dusted in the most beautiful rose that makes me fawn over this stunning wolf.

He clears his throat, looking away a few times as if he can't hold my gaze and it makes me smirk, loving the way he seems so flustered by my appearance.

"Hi, Jessie." He says, his voice breathless and cheeks rosy. I smile at him, reaching out a hand to brush against his cheekbones. "I just wanted to say thank you. And that I see you. You seem like you're always there to take the burden from Cody. I can already see how amazing you are." He tells me and my heart almost explodes from the joy it brings me.

"Don't mention it. I look forward to getting to know the two of you. I'm lucky the Goddess blessed me with someone as strong, beautiful and astonishing as you. Until we meet again, Jamie." The nickname falls from my lips so effortlessly, I immediately decide I like it, especially after seeing the way James' eyes light up and avoids eye contact afterwords.

Fucking adorable.

My sweet little Alpha.

I hand the reigns back to Cody so they can wrap up their training and head in for the night.

Maybe we'll end up being okay after all.

~~~~~~~~~
Hmmm I might change the ending I might not, but what did you guys think of this version of James and Jessie meeting rather than in the middle of their first Heat after they've already been Mated? I think this is a lot more realistic.

Thoughts?

Comments?

QOTD: Whats a recent book you've finished?