Emilia was nervous.

Iris-messaging Hylla had never been this nerve-wracking. It was just a call, nothing more. It wasn't like they could talk for hours– they both needed their sleep and Coach Hedge's nightly duty involved walking up and down the halls demanding lights out and quiet. Emilia was sure she'd go ballistic trying to maintain a conversation while simultaneously avoiding the noise level necessary to make the satyr bang his baseball bat against the cabin door.

She propped up the Iris-message once she was in her pajamas. It was an hour earlier in Seattle, which hopefully meant Hylla wouldn't be asleep just yet.

"Hi!" she said brightly as she connected, setting aside a book as if she'd been reading. "You're okay."

"I am," said Emilia with a shy smile. "I'm glad you're okay, too, Hylla Twice-Kill. Percy told me."

She blushed. "A minor thing." Her brows furrowed. "Reyna did call to tell me about what happened. But I want to hear it from you. Even she sounded doubtful... whatever it was, it wasn't your fault, right? She said she saw... something on the ship."

Emilia told her her own version of the day's events, making sure to emphasize Eris's presence– something Octavian had seen. He'd either have already mentioned it to show that Emilia and Leo (and the rest of the Greeks) were dangerous, or he'd omitted it to insist it was all on them.

Hylla remained calm. "Well, I knew I'd believe you before you started saying anything. I'm sure my sister will not be swayed by rumors. She's smart. Would you like me to tell her?"

"No, that's alright," said Emilia. "I don't want to turn you into a messenger. I leave that choice up to you." She half-smiled, the familiar quirk of Hylla's lips bringing warmth. "I miss you."

"I miss you, too," whispered Hylla. "Do you have any idea how long you'll be gone?"

"Our current deadline to figure things out is... six days. After that, I don't know where we'll go. I'd very much like to Iris-message you each night if that's alright. I won't risk giving details of where we are in case Octavian can somehow track us this way– really, I've never been sure if it's possible, but Kronos once told me that Iris-messages are very insecure and that's why he never liked using them. I'm also not sure if my mother can see into them."

Hylla frowned. "She hasn't come back, I hope?"

"Not yet. I'm not sure what I'd say to her if she did. I hope my words moved her in some way. It's hard to know what to say to her. You know, some gods can be so mature about things and others aren't, it doesn't matter how long they've been alive. I'm not sure if I should approach her as a daughter or as... just another magical being."

"You'll know it," said Hylla. "You're better at reading people than you think, Emilia. You are also brave and good with your words. It's a great combination."

She tilted her head. "I wish I was as perceptive as you, though. You seem to know things about others before they've had a chance to tell you."

Hylla shrugged, a small smile playing on her lips. "I've had a lot of practice. Running a kingdom isn't easy when you can't sense things about people. I'm not the best at it when it comes to situations where I'm more emotionally involved. Gods, sometimes I still feel shy talking to you even though we've established our feelings. It's like, my palms still sweat, my tongue feels tied. I see you and my heart stops. All thoughts fly out the window. I can only look at you and hope to find my words again when I give myself a moment to readjust when gazing upon your beauty."

Emilia glanced at her feet shyly. "Who was good with words again?"

"Shh. You are still good with them. You spoke up first, didn't you? You forged connections with your family. I... can't claim to have that courage. I don't think I'd want to reopen old wounds. You are willing to step past that. It's what I admire about you. You have a warrior's heart. I still think you'd make a great Amazon."

"Maybe," said Emilia. "I'd very much like to have a calm moment to consider it in the future. There are still so many choices. I could join my brother at Berkeley. Pollux in Seattle. I could do my studies online and be part of the Amazons. I can go to college in New Rome– gods, it was so beautiful and I didn't even tour it properly. I could also remain as a counselor at Camp Half-Blood. I want to have these choices."

"You will have them," said Hylla. "Trust yourself." She leaned forward, as if wanting to press her body against Emilia's, only for the rainbow to prevent it.

Emilia secretly missed that, when their legs would randomly touch just from how engaged they were in conversation. Sometimes Hylla crossed one leg over Emilia's lap or placed her hand on Emilia's arm. A few times, Emilia put her arm around the headrest wherever Hylla sat. Tiny moments that neither thought held much value until they were impossible to do.

"Would you ever want to see New York?" asked Emilia. "I know you can't really afford to leave Seattle but... if things calmed down... would you be alright with me showing you around?"

Hylla grinned. "I'd love that. I trust Kinzie to handle things for me if I were to take a short moment to... recruit from the East Coast. I'm sure there are many campers well-suited for Camp Half-Blood. Krista wishes to meet the Stoll brothers that Pollux has mentioned several times. She may like to go with me and assess the recruits. From the things I've heard, the two camps... they are different."

"Yes. I found it so beautiful how families have continued safely in Camp Jupiter. It has more structure. I think I would have fared well there. Camp Half-Blood is a bit more whimsical. Still very good and I felt it was the place I needed right as I left the Titan Army. I benefited from their guidance and outlook on life. But Greek demigods seem to always have trouble surviving out of camp. Most stay on as counselors and those who go off to college are like Pollux... a little less powerful. I like knowing there is another place."

"How do you think it would've happened?" asked Hylla, gesturing between them. "If you went to Camp Jupiter instead?"

Emilia blew air out of her mouth. "Gods... that's quite the thing to think about. So many things might've been different. I... don't know if I still would've been one of the Eight. I might've learned about the Amazons sooner and joined just to leave the camp. I felt so out of place after I left Kronos but I stayed at Camp Half-Blood because aside from the Hunters of Artemis, the only other option was fending for myself. I suppose I still would've met you somehow but if I joined the Amazons I don't think I'd have had the courage to speak up to you. I'm sure I would be a very different person. I'm glad for how things happened. Some things were terrible but I am proud of who I am now."

"I like that," said Hylla. "I, too, often think of all that Reyna and I went through and while in those moments I felt so powerless... I look back now and realize I would not be who I am without that series of events. Maybe it's too optimistic of a viewpoint but... I can't change the past, can I? I'd rather appreciate what I am doing in the present. I like it. I like being Queen and I like that I got to meet you when I did... the way I did. I like that we're exploring this. I like not knowing what comes next."

"Me, too," said Emilia, flinching as Coach Hedge slammed the bat into her door.

"LIGHTS OUT!" he yelled. "I can hear you chatting in there, Gonzalez!"

"I have to go," said Emilia, rolling her eyes as he kept slamming the bat rhythmically against the frame. "I'll talk to you tomorrow. Take care, Hylla. Good night."

"You too, Emilia," said Hylla softly. "Stay safe."

She swiped her hand out to end the Iris-message. "There!" she yelled back at Hedge, not sure if he could even hear her. "Stop that racket or I will actually barbecue you!"

"I better not hear another peep out of that room!" he warned as he stalked off. She waited for his footsteps to recede before slipping out into the hall, ascending to the deck and taking a moment to breathe in the fresh air.

When she was little, she liked staring at the stars through the window, never understanding why the darkness made her feel secure. Most children were afraid of the dark. They feared things that weren't there, they were wary of uncertainty. Not her. It was only after she was told who she was that she figured the comfort came because her grandmother was Nyx, because Eris resided in the Mansion of Night, because darkness was what she was made of, what reminded her of home.

She'd never stared at the sky imagining her mother's presence. Lately, she would rethink her conversation with Hylla, smile to herself, try to tire herself out before attempting to sleep. She could rarely flop back on her bed and knock out immediately after– she was too giddy and at least in the sky, she could picture Hylla for a moment longer and then accept sleep when it arrived.

Tonight, she thought of Eris. Her mother had no control over her own life– could that be why she was grasping at straws trying to control Emilia's? But how could she give her the control she craved and convince her to return to the Mansion of Night? Why would anyone willingly go to such an awful–at least, it sounded awful– place?

She felt Eris appear before she saw her. Emilia whirled around, summoning Incubo and glaring at her mother. "Stop following us," said Emilia sharply. "I will sound the alarm bells and we'll all converge on you. I will send you back to Tartarus in pieces."

"I'm not following you," said Eris, her voice more gentle than Emilia had heard before. "You've summoned me."

"No, I didn't."

"I did not choose to arrive here. It's nighttime, child, your powers and mine are stronger at this time. You don't need to be asleep to make it happen. I felt a call and I... came."

Emilia relaxed slightly. "So Gaea didn't send you? You're not here to hurt us?"

"That clearly didn't work," said Eris calmly. "You resisted me. You marked this ship with your signature, your particular darkness. You... placed a protective veil against my magic the moment you invoked your love for your friends."

"I... can do that?"

"You manipulate emotions as much as you manipulate shadows, little one. You've always thought you feel emotions differently, that you are less capable of happiness and love... but that isn't necessarily true. Very few demigods are capable of these things. Your friend Piper, her charmspeak can work wonders when she fills her tone with all her worries, fears, and affections. Children of Ares and Mars can move millions when their anger can be felt. And you, my dear, you can manipulate emotions into darkness but you've learned how to do the opposite, haven't you? You've unsown discord before to protect your friends from their own feelings, from a destructive spiral that leaves them doubtful and weak. Is it so hard to believe you could defend them on a larger scale?"

"So I left you unable to sow any more discord here?" asked Emilia, unsure.

"In everyone but the satyr," said Eris, rolling her eyes. "Though he's not useful in any sense."

"That we agree on." She paused. "You're here because I called and you can't do anything but listen? Why not vanish? Are you... actually willing to have a conversation?"

Eris stared at her for a moment. "You know, I dislike this. You aren't afraid of me."

"You're annoyed that I'm not scared of you?"

"Not exactly. Most demigods can be afraid, for even just a moment, when they encounter their godly parents. They fear disappointing them, not measuring up to expectations. Of course, those feelings can go away easily. But I dislike that instead of being afraid of me in any capacity you... are angry. You resent me. The emotions you feel towards your friends are much different than the emotions you feel toward me. It made me think of what you said. You resented me when you first served Kronos. And I suppose it also made me think of how Nemesis and I used to defend each other. We used to get along before the wars."

"I saw her," said Emilia. "Your sister. She still cares about you, you know. She seeks to tear down the proud and powerful and... maybe she hopes you won't be a part of that group when the time comes. I am confident Gaea will fail. The world needs balance and I don't believe that it will be possible for her to rise above. Why were you and Nemesis so close in the first place? You had so many other siblings. What was it about her that drew you both together?"

"My mother wasn't very warm," said Eris slowly. "It's what you expect from Nyx. Nemesis and I, we were so alike. We both wanted to be acknowledged more than we were. Some of our siblings were more special to our mother. Everyone made it a contest in the Mansion of Night– who could be the most terrible? Nemesis and I felt we were more horrifying than anything else. Revenge, strife, imbalance. We could drive mortals to do anything. Fates worse than death. I think we saw in each other what my mother didn't see in us. I suppose in a way I know what it's like to be a child who wants to know their mother. Craving everything and receiving nothing."

"Maybe that's why Gaea knew she could use you," said Emilia. "She saw you needed someone to accept that you were powerful and revere you and she gave you the attention you wanted. And after the war, Nemesis was acknowledged because Ethan turned, in the end but I didn't, so you weren't and it drove you two apart. You wanted what she had and you became jealous, didn't you? Gaea offered you all these great things and you let that discord grow too much in you."

She stepped closer to her mother. "Really, what do you expect to gain from all of this? You and your sister will never get along again if you win. Look at all the other demigods on this boat– no one is dying to make their parents proud of them. We've been through horrible ordeals and we have strained relationships with those that created us but we are taking on a burden that was placed on us and accepting it no matter what it means. We're not focusing on glory, we're focusing on what is right, what we deserve. Have you ever thought about that? What you deserve? Forget for a moment that the Olympians are fools. Are you going to gain anything from the giants winning? I bet you'll only have attention as long as you remain useful to Gaea. You can have so much more if you let go of your own discord, if you do what I did and open yourself up to better things."

Eris was silent. Emilia continued, "You want to know what I love about my friends? Percy is loyal. He'll do anything for the people he cares about. When he loves, he loves deeply. It puts him in danger of hurting himself. He has, many times. He taught me how to deal with that. He was the first person to believe I was capable of more. He didn't do it because he stood to gain anything. He did it because he understood what a second chance could mean."

She smiled as she continued, "Annabeth is so smart. She always knows what to say and strives to be the best so that people won't leave her; she's been abandoned many times before. Because of that, she never abandons other people. She didn't abandon me. She trusted me when I didn't trust myself. No matter what her mother thought, she didn't abandon Percy, either. She doesn't always know exactly what path to take but she will reshape whichever one she chooses to make sure wrongs are righted. I admire her for it.

"Leo tells jokes to forget his pain and to hopefully rid others of their pain, too. He doesn't realize how valuable he is because no one's ever made him see it consistently, no one has ever shown him how much he matters. Some people don't take him seriously and it makes him remember his mother, who only ever had to work in that machine shop because she wasn't taken seriously.

"Piper is unbelievably selfless. Even when her loved ones are on the line, she finds a way to think clearly and in doing so, she hurts herself weighing pros and cons but she does it with so much love for the innocents in the world, people she will never meet and people who will never know her name.

"Jason always does the right thing. People think he's too proper, that he's a leader and that's all, but Jason cares so very much and he also cares about morality because what do we become when we let our worst self take over? He keeps others in check and reminds them of their worth.

"I hardly know Frank and Hazel but I see in them a brightness that I almost envy. No matter what they've suffered, they don't take it out on others, they use it for good because they know that no matter what's happening on Olympus, they cancontrol the fates of demigods and mortals alike. They can make the world stable and that's what they intend to do, whatever the cost.

"I think you deserve to be cared for like that, Mother. I think you hold more value than you realize. I didn't use to believe it about myself but I'm sure it is true for you, too. You just have to care about yourself enough to realize that Gaea is using you, that you lack control over your life because of your own choices, not other people's. You're never going to get what you want like this. I would like to know you more. But I won't get to if I'm dead once your patron takes over, I won't want to if anything happens to my friends. We could have a good relationship, one day."

She thought of Eris disappearing and closed her eyes. When she opened them again, the goddess was gone. She promised herself she'd try her best not to think about her for a while. She'd give her a moment to sit with that. To see what her daughter had attained despite the odds being stacked against her, to want that, too.

In the morning, she awoke to the breakfast bell. Tired, she crawled out of bed and showered before reporting to the dining hall for breakfast. The ship's landing gear was extending outside as they prepared to make their descent on Kansas. She climbed on deck after filling herself with pancakes and joined the others as the Argo II settled in the middle of a field of sunflowers. The oars retracted, the gangplank lowering.

The morning air smelled of irrigation, warm plants, and fertilized earth. Emilia drew a deep breath, then leaned on Jason as he squinted up at the sky. "Trying to talk to the sun?" she asked.

"Just wondering what's waiting for us here," he said. "And assessing how good I feel. I think I'm all better... the air feels good to fly in."

"Still crazy to me how you can do that," she said, looking over her shoulder as Leo walked past with a piece of toast clenched between his teeth.

"Did you talk to Hylla last night?" asked Jason, causing Leo to skid to a halt and listen in.

"I did," said Emilia. "It was nice. Told her what happened and she understood, of course. I figure she'll want to tell Reyna even if I said she doesn't have to."

"I heard Coach banging on your door," said Leo between mouthfuls of toast. "You were up late."

"Shut up," said Emilia, reaching over to snatch the remaining piece away, offering it to Jason. "It wasn't that late."

"Oh, it was definitely late," agreed Jason. "Emilia's fallen hard."

"It wasn't all that different from other Iris-messages! You two are reading too much into it."

Leo wiggled his eyebrows. "Your cabin can be modified for a guest to spend the night."

Jason snickered as Emilia rolled her eyes, face red. Hazel blushed on the other side of Jason, knowing exactly what Leo was implying. Before Emilia could smack Leo on the back of the head, he darted back to the Wii controller to finish their landing.

"So!" said Annabeth, plucking a bagel out of Piper's hand and taking a bite. "Here we are. What's the plan?"

"I want to check out the highway," said Piper. "Find the sign that says Topeka 32."

Leo spun the Wii controller in a circle, lowering the sails. "We shouldn't be far. Festus and I calculated the landing as best as we could. What do you expect to find at the mile marker?"

Piper explained the vision she'd seen in the knife– a man in purple with a goblet. Everyone was sure it was Dionysus/Bacchus but they couldn't agree if he was there to help them or not.

"The god himself is okay," said Jason. "I did him a favor once up in the wine country."

Percy looked appalled. "Whatever, man. Maybe he's better on the Roman side. But hwy would he be hanging around in Kansas? Didn't Zeus order the gods to cease all contact with mortals?"

Frank grunted. "The gods haven't been very good at following that order. Besides, if the gods have gone schizophrenic like Hazel said–"

"And Leo and Emilia said," added Leo.

He implied the addition, "Then who knows what's going on with the Olympians? Could be some pretty bad stuff out there."

"Sounds dangerous," Leo agreed cheerfully. "Well... you guys have fun. I've got to finish repairs on the hull. Coach Hedge is gonna work on the broken crossbows. And, uh, Annabeth– I could really use your help. You're the only other person who even sort of understands engineering."

Annabeth looked apologetically at Percy. "He's right. I should stay and help."

"I'll come back to you." He kissed her on the cheek. "Promise."

Frank slid his bow off his shoulder and propped it against the rail. "I think I should turn into a crow or something and fly around, keep an eye out for Roman eagles."

"Why a crow?" asked Leo. "Man, if you can turn into a dragon, why don't you just turn into a dragon every time? That's the coolest."

Frank's face reddened. "That's like asking why you don't bench-press your maximum weight every time you lift. Because it's hard, and you'd hurt yourself. Turning into a dragon isn't easy."

"Oh." Leo nodded. "I wouldn't know. I don't lift weights."

"Guys, come on," said Emilia, not wanting to deal with this strange Frank-Hazel-Leo tension a second time. "Frank, I'm sure Leo's question was just out of curiosity. Leo, let Frank be, he knows what's best to keep himself safe and healthy. I know we're all still new to each other so let's... be mindful of everyone's sense of humor and their abilities. We each know what we're capable of and we're the only ones that can understand that."

Hazel cleared her throat. "Yes. How about I summon Arion and scout around below?"

"Sure," said Frank, still glaring at Leo. "Yeah, thanks."

Piper and Emilia shared a look. Emilia was glad Piper had picked up on this strange pissing contest, too. "The four of us can go check out the mile marker," said Emilia. "We'll be there to have your back, Piper."

She smiled weakly. "Okay. Let's find the highway."