v a l e r i e : i seriously have no motivation today....

d y l a n : do you ever?

v a l e r i e : wow. i thought after you became my boyfriend you would automatically stop being a jack ass.

d y l a n : *smirks* nope. i need to be a jack ass to you. it's my addiction.

v a l e r i e : you probably need to take aa: assholes anonymous.

d y l a n : there is no such thing as that.

v a l e r i e : there is now. state your name and the reason why you're here.

d y l a n : hi i'm dylan and i am here because my depressed girlfriend says i needed to come here.

v a l e r i e : and?

d y l a n : and because i have a condition called impulsive asshole disease.

v a l e r i e : very good. you want to learn the first step in NOT being an asshole?

d y l a n : okay; what?

v a l e r i e : don't become one in the first place!