hello im a stupid weaboo that loves black butler with a vengeance

so: what do sebastian and ciel feel for each other is a kuro question that constantly bothers me

lets get this straight: i HATE the shipping between them. it's awful and doesnt make sense from a plot perspective (also, nasty yall). ciel is heavily implied to have been sexually assaulted during his captivity, so it feels very, very distasteful to ship him with an adult. also, he loves his gf lizzie UwU. but thats my two cents lol

so, obviously, this isnt a romantic or sexual relationship. contrary to popular belief, ive read the entire manga and you have to have shipping goggles on to even see it that way. but...what is their relationship?

im always tempted to be like "well, sebastian said himself that he doesn't have human feelings. he hates ciel and is just waiting for him to die" and,,that's a really black (ha) and white to look at it. and the actual canon itself barely supports it.

sebastian is, for the lack of better words, extra. he does crap he doesnt have to. honestly, hes one of the most interesting characters ive come across. he actively enjoys playing the part of a butler. in boa, ciels like "lol go wild and have fun" and sebastians like "actually my 'having fun' is pretending to be human"

he does stuff for ciel he just,,doesnt have to. naturally, ciel orders him to do a lot of petty stuff, but...what is this?

(yeah, this is my book. i dont pirate EVERYTHING)

theres no real point for sebastian to cover ciels eyes when he sees the scene of the murder- ciel never said "hey man, cover my eyes if it gets gnarly"

heck, sebastian even says he WANTS ciel to be corrupted- makes the soul taste better

yet...he shields his innocent eyes anyway. hmm...

also, another big moment that interests me:

in the green witch arc (my FAVORITE ARC), ciel is unknowingly affected by mustard gas, which triggers some really bad ptsd and leaves him a total wreck (and also blind). he becomes very, VERY afraid of sebastian because of some really plot relevant reasons later (and afraid of adults in general, which adds to my sexual assault theory).

he screams for sebastian not to touch him (only allowing finny, a teenager, to care for him)

and...

this isnt the face of a man who hates his young master. sebastian isnt putting on a show- hes genuinely upset that ciel rejected him. if he just flat out hated ciel, he wouldnt act like this

he even gives finny advice on how to relieve ciels anxiety- by making him his favorite drink. theres no gain for sebastian to do this, at all. theres no "make sure i dont cry myself to sleep every night" requirement of his contract. all he has to do is keep him alive.

heck, sebastians attempt to claim his soul to snap him out of depression could ever be constructed as some weird act of kindness (since that was a very successful kick in the balls to get ciel back on his feet)

ever straying away from the drastics, ciel and sebastian act more like vitriolic friends than enemies. theyre constantly doing dumb, petty stuff just to get under each others skin.

heck, they even make a pretty funny pair, telling jokes and laughing together (about someone dying)

freaking buncha losers

i mean, its hard to believe there's not ANYTHING going on between them. sebastians pretty much raised ciel for three years- its hard not to form any kind of bond. especially since ciel is in desperate need for a male authority figure. and sebastians a dead ringer for vincent phantomhive.

perhaps it's not a fluffy, healthy affection, but hey, these arent fluffy, healthy characters even. ciel and sebastian are many many dark shades of morally grey, and whatever it is, their relationship is complex.