Oddly, she felt empty.

Drained. Everything bad.

Ripped down to her bones.

Her tears had dried on her face , all the black thoughts swirled above her over the bed. .she kept staring at the ceiling. . wanting him back.

What was wrong with her?

First she pushed him away. .then she wanted him back? Her mind was shattering with bleak thoughts and the thought of him who probably didn't even give a damn about his own self...about his own heart.

Jennifer knew he would be on the somewhere in the apartment , smoking cigarette after cigarette.

She knew no matter how much she cried or withered away, he won't come inside. .and this was the difference between them.

His hurt could be washed away with the smoke of a cheap cigarette and she? all she had available were tears and that too had stopped. The anguish was deep within her bones , sometimes love really made one helpless. .

She knew his pride would always win against love and even now , his pride got a punch.

Sitting up, she wiped her face clean and got down the bed. Then she rushed towards the door knowing well where she would find him.

She didn't have to look around much because he was standing in the middle of the lounge , smoking away all his pain.

The second she stepped out of the room, he turned his neck slightly at her . . seeing her disheveled appearance that too had a hold on him. .he looked away. . gripping her heart.

Angry, she walked towards him and stood right in front of him , her eyes burning.

"You think it's only you who is walking around with pride and self respect right?" She asked him in a tight voice.

Jonathan took a swig , his eyes red rimmed , as he watched her face blaze.

"You didn't sleep , I see." He said in a normal tone , not at all acknowledging what had transpired. .his eyes detached.

"I won't sleep." She rasped at his cold behavior , once again wanting to cry right here right now.

"And why is that?" He asked not looking at her , enjoying his smoke.

"You don't know?" She asked in a low voice, getting at his heart again.

His nostrils flared . "Leave."

"Stop...you need to stop this," she pleaded.

"And what exactly am I doing?" His patience was thinning.

Jennifer looked at the corner of room where he had discarded at least six cigarettes.

"Stop smoking. .it's not good."

The way she said , he had to really look at her. .at the wet sheen in her eyes ...the swollen edges of her eyes. .the bitten lips. .

He had to look away.

"Just leave, Jennifer."

"I apologise alright?"she placed it tentatively on his arm.

"I know I shouldn't have—,"

He didn't give her a chance because she found herself flushed against his hard chest , his arm wrapped around her in deadly grip.

"You shouldn't have what?? Not stepped all over me?" His voice was burning and his eyes had the possessive glint that always shut her up. . raising the cigarette , he lightly stamped it on the edge of her lips and she pushed back at the slight contact of the cigarette. .

"That's it? You know what? If you had stamped it all over me , it wouldn't have hurt this much and you keep doing this every single day." His voice was barely a whisper.

"Brand me with it too then." She had a wild shine in her eyes.

"Think again." He warned , watching her beautiful face . .

"For you , a thousand times over." Jennifer smiled and he simply couldn't take it anymore when he crushed her too his chest and kissed the side of her head and then pulled back , kissing the redness beside her mouth tenderly while she winced.

She didn't know how she reached the bed but yes, he made her relive the night over and over again until the sky lit up.

×××××××××

He had been noticing her , not eating her breakfast for the third morning today.

"What's wrong?" He took a sip of his coffee.

She made a face ,"I'm not hungry."

"Are you okay?" He took his hand in his , feeling her.

"Yeah, I'm. ." She leaned back against the couch. "I just don't like the smell of it. ." She made a face again , pushing the plate back .

"Okay don't eat it. Have some juice." He said now worried.

"I can't. .I just can't." She whined.

"Listen, you know I don't know how to convince people . I'm zero so either you eat this or I'll sit here till you do." He threatened.

She gave up when he lifted the glass of orange juice and had her drink it though she had like three sips.

"I'll be taking you the doc—,"

"No need—,"

"Yes." He stressed as he got up , noticing her color . She looked pale. .eyes shut and breathing slowly. .

Jonathan bent down and kissed her jugular vein , instantly making her sit up with eyes wide.

"Take care." He said with a smile seeing the blush creeping up on her.

××××××

Oh well, now she knew what was wrong with her.

Pregnant.

She had continued to watch the pregnancy test with a hand clapped over her mouth.

Putting her hand on her stomach , a different feeling engulfed her whole being. . . unconditional love.

How would he respond to that?

Sitting on the bed , she thought and then went into overdrive . . imagining the whole scene.

And then making up reactions in her head.

She knew one thing for sure , Jonathan would make a great Dad. He had it in him. .and about herself as being a mother? She didn't have such an assuring answer to that. She barely had a relationship with her own mother and......she hugged her stomach protectively.

Vowing to herself for giving the baby all the love she never got. All the attention and time she missed out on. Yeah. .she could fix the hole in her heart too. .maybe . .

Oh God!

She—no...they were pregnant!

××××××