a/n: the script is one of my favorite bands in the whole world! and this ☝🏻️ song is perfect for the chapter! make sure to play it as you read. hope you like it!

*Luke's P.O.V*

I try to speak, but my voice simply doesn't come out. I feel a knot in my throat while my heart beats so fast I'm afraid it may explode at any minute. Michael is staring in expectation at me, but I'm too astonished to talk. I then realize my jaw has been dropped for about ten seconds now and I wasn't able to say a single fucking word.

Laurel really is talking to me.

"Oh... hi" That's all I manage to answer.

"How are you? It's been a while, right?" She laughs embarrassedly.

Oh my God, I've missed her voice so much.

"I-I'm pretty well, actually." I stutter, clearing my throat.

"Really?"

I sigh.

"Of course not, I'm a mess. I miss you like hell."

"I miss you too."

Neither of us say anything. I'm trying to process her statement and wonder if she means it.

"So... how's tour?" She breaks the ice. "Michael told me you've been getting yourself in some trouble, huh?"

"That's a lie, I'm okay" I frown. "If you miss me why didn't you pick up any of my calls?"

Laurel takes a deep breath.

"Luke, seriously? Do you want to discuss a relationship that no longer exists?"

"Well if you miss me and I miss you, I guess it means we are not over" I insist. "Please let's talk about what happened..."

"This is not why I'm calling." She scolds. "I just want to hear from you, how you are, how your life is, everything but us."

"My life used to be us"

"Don't make things harder than they already are"

"I'm not doing that, you are" I retort. "Why can't we talk about it? Why can't you listen to me?"

"I will listen if you promise me that you're gonna stop doing all the wrong things you've been doing" She proposes. "Your friends and your family are all very concerned about you."

It feels like someone just stabbed me in the stomach.

"You didn't call because you wanted to talk to me" I whisper. "You were asked to, weren't you?"

She remains silent.

And I get my answer.

"Well, then I'm not forcing you to do anything." I say coldly, trying to patch up the pieces of heart. "Bye."

When I'm about to hang up she screams WAIT.

"What?" I scoff. "Don't worry, I'll tell the dudes you said hi."

"Luke Robert Hemmings, you better stop being ironic with me" She warns in the demanding tone I, somehow, missed so much. "Oh Lord, fine. Michael asked me to talk to you, but I'm worried as well, and he thought I could help. So tell me, what's going on? Is this because of me? Is this because of us?"

"Does this even need an answer?" I smile, sadly. "It's not a coincidence I came back to drugs and drinking a lot after we broke up. It doesn't go a single day by in which I don't think about you, I dream about you, I write about you. It's been exactly 2 months and you haven't spoken a word to me during this entire time. I know you called on my birthday and I tried to reach you back but you wouldn't pick up. I went completely mad without hearing from you, you blocked me on Twitter, unfollowed me on Instagram, unfriended me on Facebook, Jesus, Laurel, you simply vanished from my life! This is not something you do to the people who need you!"

"And you think I don't miss you?" She replies, and by her tone I know she's crying. "I can't even focus on my work because I'm too busy thinking of you! I can't sleep, I can't eat, my friends are worried because I look sad all the time and it also doesn't go a single day by that I don't brood over us!"

"What are you even talking about? You've moved on." I mumble.

"Luke, that's far from the truth. Like, really far. Jim is a friend, he has helped me so much and we drank a few beers but that's it!"

I sigh, massaging my temples.

"What do I have to do for you to come back to me?" I pleadingly ask.

"I don't think it would be a good idea for us to be together, you know that. But we can be friends, can't we?"

I cringe at the sound of the word friends.

"Are you serious right now?" I laugh sarcastically. "Is that what you want? To be friends with me?"

She groans in anger.

"You know what I want? I want things to be easy to both of us for the first time ever. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and be sure that I ain't going to be denied. According to you, I want someone who's going to be by my side every day, with a job that normal people have, without paparazzi harassing me. And you want some skinny rich flawless model that's going to be applauded by everyone for being your girlfriend. Isn't that what you said? That you should be with someone like you? Then why on earth are you insisting on me? Tell me, Luke, because you make absolutely no sense!"

I'm embarrassed. Sad, but embarrassed. The worst feeling in the world is not being able to defend yourself from accusations because you actually did it all.

"That was not what I meant, Laurel, I was mad..." I violently run my fingers through my hair, trying to find a way out. "Listen, that's our first conversation in months. Do you want it to be like this?"

"To begin with, let's stop with the play the victim bullshit, okay?" She cuts me off. "If you did something then admit it, God dammit! And also, you started this all, I just wanted to hear from you, not argue about a non-existent relationship"

That hurt... a lot.

"You know, you say that I have moved on, but it was Amanda picking up your phone on your birthday. You don't need to clarify things to me, but if you want someone like you, she's the perfect match, I mean, she's rich, she's famous, she's pretty... All you need to do is the exact opposite you did to me and announce worldwide that you guys are together, so stalking will be constant but it's something you guys are used to, unlike me, right?" Fires Laurel, nonstop.

I take a deep breath, bracing myself for the speech I am about to make. Everything that has been inside my head for two months that I haven't said yet, I'm about to.

"I'm sorry." I whisper, fighting some tears that are starting to form in my eyes. "I'm sorry that I hurt you this much, but all I was trying to do was to protect you from everything I hate in my life; I was never ashamed of you, I never denied my love for you; in fact I was so proud of myself that I finally found someone in this world who I could trust entirely. For the first time I knew that my job didn't need to be an obstacle in my love life. Do you know what happens inside this crazy entertainment industry? They literally force you to do things. They obligate you to change aspects in your life you'd sworn you never would. God, they even make you grow to like someone! Or you thought those perfect relationships between actors and singers were all true? Please. We are nothing but puppets.
But with you... I didn't fake it, it happened. It happened fast as a blink of an eye, and it was precious to me. So precious that I wanted to keep you safe, locked with dozens of keys so no one would steal you from me. Well, apparently you didn't want my protection, which caused us to split up. So, I'm sorry, Laurel. I'm sorry if you felt denied, unloved. In reality, I never thought I would love someone the way I loved, I mean, love you. You will always be my Angel, my Delilah, my Sunflower, my Hazel Eyes, my Princess, my Laurel. However, if you want me to forget about you and move on with my life, just say it." I stop, knowing that I can't no longer help crying. "If I hear you say it, maybe it gets real. Maybe I end up believing that you don't love me anymore and that I will, eventually, get over you. So say it if you truly want this, or if you want us to try again, start all over. I promise you that I will be better than I ever was. You're going to choose Laurel, all you have to do is to say it."

I hear her small crying on the other side, and the urge to run and hug her grows stronger inside me. But it's a desire I'll have to learn how to control.

She says nothing. I want words but all I hear is nothing.

So I give up, sighing.

"Okay..." I wipe my eyes, trying to steady my breathing. "At least I tried, I did all I could. Have a good life, Laurel."

"Luke..."

I hesitantly put the phone away from my ear, hearing her call my name. I squint as I hit 'end call', and the entire room is consumed by a deadly silence.

I look up at Michael after some time, and he's staring down at me, with sorrowful eyes. Weakly, I stand up, passing him his phone.

"Thank you, Mikey," I hug him, sniffing. "for everything you've done. I love you."

"I love you too, you're my brother" He smiles sadly at me, knowing that everything went terribly wrong. "What are you going to do now?"

I let go of him and grab my wallet, tugging it inside my pocket.

"The only thing that's left to be done: try to forget." I respond by the doorframe. I look back as he frowns. "I'm going out, please don't follow me. I'll be fine, just... I'm getting back before our flight."

I hear Michael calling me but I block my senses. Tonight, all I need to be is numb.

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