03. chapter three.
—the little things

THERE WAS NEVER a time at the beach house where I was unhappy, or at least a time that stuck with me because every time someone or anyone mentioned beach houses, I immediately thought about the Conklin's and the Fishers. Everyone praised Alva's amazing cooking. The pranks. The games. Early mornings to see the sunrise while surfing, late nights to capture the mysterious moon.

It never crossed my mind that after last summer, everything could change because once you grow up, experience the universe spiraling around you, that's when you realize that not everything is sunshine and rainbows. As it seems, it's much deeper than you thought, and you might just drown if you're not careful enough.

I was walking down the steps when I heard Alva tell Kenny, "when I asked you to come in, I meant that I'd want you sitting down!"

Kenny was always awkward when it was just Alva and him. He told me that she's very intimidating and scary. And that's when I told him, "Hispanic moms are always scary." He laughed right in my face.

"But you are Hispanic." He had told me.

"That's how I know." My face had come so close to his that I couldn't hold my laugh for too long.

Kenny and I met when we were seven years old. I was building a sand castle and the next thing I knew, it was gone. He had run straight into it. I was about to give him a piece of my mind, when suddenly, he apologized four thousand times, before I even got the chance to blink once. He then crossed his heart and promised he would help me rebuild it.

He did. We spent most of our afternoon at the beach rebuilding the sandcastle that day. Then our mothers exchanged numbers after they saw how much we got along. His mom said he didn't have many friends in Cousins, since it was their first time spending their summer here.

The following day, Kenny's mom called and asked if I could go get ice cream and then ride the ferris wheel with them. Alva refused to let me go off with complete strangers, which she later compromised with Conrad tagging along. I hated Alva for that. Hated Conrad even more for proposing the idea to her.

I later learned that Conrad being there didn't affect me or Kenny at all. He just followed both of us around like a lost little puppy with an annoyed look on his face. He also ended up riding the Ferris wheel alone. I bet he regretted doing me the "favor" after that.

"He's allowed to stand, Ma." I said, just standing there, resisting the urge to run up to Kenny and wrap my arms around his neck, so hard that he can hardly breathe.

As soon as Kenny heard my voice, he quickly turned his whole body around, his back no later facing me no more. This time, I could see his beautiful smile that covered up most, if not all, his face. "I was waiting for you to come down here."

But if I had run up to Kenny, wrapped my arms around his neck so hard that it didn't allow him to breathe, then that'd give Alva the wrong idea. That me and Kenny weren't just friends, and that we were more, then she wouldn't allow him in my bedroom—not that she thought that when she saw Belly and me, which is quite hypocritical of her.

Kenny knew why I wasn't running up to him, why instead, I was slowly walking up to him. "I am deathly afraid of your mom, Sonny." Kenny whispered in my ear as soon as he wrapped his arms around my waist, discreetly.

I laughed and whispered back, "And for good reason."

Alva spoke up. "Kenny was telling me about how you both planned on going swimming at the beach club." She started, not even close to being done. I pulled away from Kenny. I held back any word that was going to slip my mouth if I wasn't careful enough. "How come you didn't ask?"

"I didn't think it was necessary, given that we don't have any plans today, except for Laurel's book thing later." I said calmly and even added a smile at the end for good measure.

"Well, that's where you're wrong, mija." Alva added her fake smile too. "Susannah y Laurel iban a ir de compras para el baile de debutante de Belly." Susannah and Laurel were going to go dress shopping for Belly's debutante ball.

"De qué baile estás hablando?" What ball are you talking about, I asked her, confused. "Belly didn't tell me anything about a debutante ball."

"She must have forgotten to mention it then, but she told me that she wanted you to go, and said something about wanting your opinion." Alva continued, she was lying, I know she was. "Belly and you can drive to the beach club afterwards. Susannah tells me there's this tea thing there later. You and Kenny can go swimming then, yeah?"

"Oh, yeah of course." Kenny smiled, awkwardly. He turned to look at me. "Text me!" He kissed me on the cheek before stumbling his way back to the front door.

"Mierda." Shit, I whispered.

"What was that about?" Conrad walked into the kitchen in a way that annoyed me.

"Ask my mother." I grumbled, before I rushed to the fridge for some apple juice.

"Did I do something wrong?" Conrad asked Alva.

She followed by saying, "she's just in her moody Sonny mood. You know how she always is, can't keep a smile on her face."

Oh, how I wanted to open my mouth and say, "This isn't me in my moody Sonny mood, maybe it's that you didn't let me go out with my best friend that I haven't seen in two years." But I knew she'd respond with some bullshit, go to your room, and think about what you said, so I didn't say anything.

Belly was heard throughout the house, yelling, "Stop being a dick and let me in, Joshua, or I swear to god—"

My brother laughed from what I assumed was inside of the bathroom. "You'll do what, Isabel?"

"I hate you!" Her feet stumped all the way to her bedroom and then she slammed her bedroom door.

Alva chuckled. "They'll never get along will they?" She walked off somewhere after that.

I sat down beside Conrad.

"Is everything alright with you and your mom?" He asked, waited about zero seconds to ask.

"Is it that obvious?" I said sarcastically before I chugged the rest of my apple juice. "She's been going out of her way to piss me off lately. It's her only form of entertainment at this point."

He hummed.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"There is something. If it was nothing, you wouldn't have done that judgmental hmm of yours." I said.

"Judgmental hmmm, you say?" He teased me.

"Oh fuck off, Conrad." I said. "Stop acting like you don't judge people right as you see them. You give them this up and down look and everything, it freaks people out. You're like some sort of creep."

"Creep?" He questioned, acting innocent.

"Okay, play it off as though it is nothing, but I see right through you, Conrad Fisher." I stood up. "Right through you." I whispered before washing my cup and putting it in the dishwasher.

I swear I saw a smile poke through.

"You're saying I'm transparent?" He said, executing it horribly.

"You really think you're funny, don't you?" I asked him, ready to tease him more. "I still see that dork from when we were younger, acting all knowledgeable and knowing, so wise."

"I remember the competitive Sonny that would tackle you on the ground if it meant that it would prove that you were stronger than any one of us." He said. "I bet that you would still do that now."

"I would." I paused. "You all are sexist assholes."

"Ouch."

"Yeah." I said, leaning onto the island counter, and then almost walking away. "I have to go, debutante things."

"You're also a debutante?" Conrad asked, which made me stop. "Don't tell me my mom roped you in too?"

"I am not going to be a debutante. I have already been introduced into society." I said, Conrad looked at me like I was crazy. "When I was fifteen... a big party, big dress, last doll, dancing with your court..." He was confused. "My Quinceañera, dumbass."

"Oh, that's what it was?" He was acting stupid, I know that, but he was annoyingly good at being annoying.

"Yeah, that's how it was. Mierda, este pinche gringo me va volver loca." I muttered. "Can you at least pretend that you're cultured and that I taught you well, because this is getting embarrassing."

"Oh, right. Turning on my cultured side, go on..."

"See? You're still a dork." I laughed.

"I have never been a dork."

"Liar." I sang before walking out of the kitchen.

I hated Conrad so much when I was younger, but as we both grew up, became more independent, I realized that it was because we always had to share Laurel. Wherever or whatever me and Laurel were going or doing, Conrad was right there with us. It used to drive me crazy, but slowly I started to realize that he wasn't so bad to hang around with.

That moment was when Laurel had forced Conrad to teach me how to surf. I had been bugging my mom all year about how much I wanted to learn how to surf. I had refused when they had told me about the lessons. He was going to hang it over my head, "wasn't I the one who taught you how to surf?" I was so sure that he was going to say that. So sure that for the first week I didn't show up for my lessons.

My ego was so big when I was thirteen.

Alva was so mad at me for leaving Conrad outside waiting for me, so she quite literally dragged me out to the beach and stood there during the lessons. She did that day after day, until she realized that I was actually going to take him seriously.

I guess I have her to thank for knowing how to surf, well Conrad too.

After Alva stopped going to our lessons, it wasn't so awkward anymore. There wasn't an adult there watching our every move.

"Are you ready to take it to the water?" Conrad had asked me.

"I have been waiting for you to ask that, Connie." I said, knowing that he hated when I called him that, since I always did it in a mocking way. But that time he didn't say anything about it. He didn't mention how I didn't say it in a mocking way that time. Same as how I didn't say anything about how he smiled lightly when I said it.

The amount of times I fell off that surfboard was embarrassing, now that I think back to it. But I, myself, wasn't embarrassed. Because it gave Conrad and I something to talk about, to laugh about. Just between us.

He didn't go around telling everyone that I was an absolute ass at surfing. Instead, when they asked, he would tell them that I was a natural, like I was for everything, his words. Then we would look at each other and laugh. They always wondered what we were laughing about, but we would never tell them. It was just our little secret.

Did I master surfing at some point? Yes, I did.

"So, it is true that you wanted me here?" I whispered into Belly's ear as we walked into our third store.

"Of course." Belly smiled. "Wait, did I do something that made you think otherwise."

"Oh, no." I said. "My mom was being a dick about me going swimming with Kenny. She all of a sudden has a problem with him or something."

"Did you just call Alva a dick?" Belly's eyes widened.

"Say it louder, would you."

"Sorry." She whispered. "I didn't realize you and Alva weren't getting along. I mean, we've all known you two don't have the strongest relationship, but I hadn't realized it was this bad. How bad is it though?"

"Belly we are here to shop, not talk about my relationship with my mother." I said as I looked through the racks of clothes. I knew she was glaring at me. She has always hated me keeping things from her. There's a lot I haven't told her, some things I don't plan on telling her.

"We have to find you a dress too, right Sonny?" Susannah smiled brightly from across the store.

"Right." I smiled back at her.

I looked back at Belly. She didn't look like she was enjoying herself much. "Do you really want to do this whole debutante thing or is Susannah unknowingly forcing you to?"

"Why is everyone asking me that!" Belly practically yelled. "No, I want to do this. Susannah isn't forcing me to do anything."

"Damn, sorry." I muttered, turning back to the racks. "You can do whatever you want, Belly. You would run around naked for all I care, but do it because you want to, not because you feel the need to please someone. Trust me, pleasing people never ends well. It's just you that ends up roped in more, yeah?"

Belly nodded.

I'm pretty sure everything that I told her just went in one ear and out the other because Belly has always been a people pleaser. It could be something so big, something that was hurting her and she'd just let it slide. It was just the type of person Belly has always been.

It was hypocritical of me to give her all this advice when I was doing the exact same thing.

"Are you sure I don't look stupid?" Belly asked as she looked into the car mirror, fixing her very big, very fancy hat.

"No, you don't look stupid." I repeated for the fifth time in the past ten minutes. I quickly shut the mirror. "I swear to god Belly, stop stalling. All you are achieving is being late, and isn't the whole point of this is to become some sort of lady? And to fully become a lady you have to be early because being on time is late."

"That is so not the point of this." Belly laughed. "You can't talk crap about debutante balls when you've had a Quinceanera."

"Debutante balls and Quinceañeras are two totally different things."

"Are they, though?"

"Yes! They are! Clearly!" I was almost serious. "First all, Quinceañeras are a coming of age celebration that not only Mexico celebrates, but most Central and South American countries partake in too. It's for when a girl "becomes a woman." There's the father-daughter dance, your last doll, your heels and crown, waltz and a surprise dance. Not to mention that it's religious too, there's a whole mass some have to go through."

"Okay, okay. It's not the same," she said.

Belly paused before she said, "I remember wanting one so bad. You looked so gorgeous and beautiful with your big puffy lavender dress. Then my mom made this really funny joke about how non-Latinos shouldn't throw big parties like the one you had because then they'd just turn out to be a waste of money, and time."

"Laurel man, I love her." I laughed.

"I really have to go." She groaned.

"How about I walk you?" I asked, but Belly didn't say anything, it was like she was preparing herself for whatever it was that this debutante thing was going to be. All I knew was that she didn't want to go up there alone. Since she was already late, we both rushed out of the car and quickly walked to the beach club.

I didn't want to be the one who brought it up, but I needed to say something. "I hate to be the one who says it, but are you sure you're prepared to interact with these rich girls?" I really hope it didn't come out as bad as I think it did. "I mean, Susannah participated in this when she was our age. Don't you think that says something about this whole thing? Not bashing Susannah, but Alva and Laurel used to tell me that they thought she was a stuck up rich girl."

"I'm sure they won't be too bad." Belly laughed, stiffly, almost as if she was trying to convince herself too.

"Oh, I know that." I said. "I mean, I spend most of my year with girls like these. But all I'm giving you is a warning. I sound stupid, I know, but I know how most of these girls pretend to be your friends, I've experienced it myself, but they can turn on you like Jeremiah did to Josh that one prank filled summer, remember?"

"Are you trying to tell me that I'm incapable of being their friend?" Belly said, playing offended, she was good at that sometimes.

"Belly." I gave her a look. "That's not at all what I'm saying, like at all. Just watch your back and don't trust too fast."

"Sonny? Belly?" That familiar voice grabbed my attention, I was no longer looking at Belly and her small, yet noticeable, silly looking, but cute, hat. I was looking in the direction of two familiar faces. Ones that were quite surprising to see together. Kenny and Jeremiah. "Wow. I didn't recognize you at first, Belly. If it hadn't been for Sonny's enormously long legs, I probably wouldn't have."

"You little shit." I shoved Jeremiah hard, which only made him laugh.

It was a running joke between the boys that I had very long legs, they used to call me daddy long legs. I used to let it get to me, until I found out that long legs were what modeling agencies wanted, not that I have ever wanted to be a model, it was that I could. The boys took notice of that and stopped mentioning it. Jeremiah continued it because he knew that it didn't get to me anymore.

"Oh my god, Kenny!" Belly greeted him with a hug, Kenny hugged her back.

My eyes were glued on Jeremiah. The way his jealousy was so clear in both his stance and expression.

"How are you, Belly?" Kenny smiled wide, they had always gotten along well.

"I'm doing good, thank you!"

"Belly, we've got to hurry, you're ten minutes late already." I waved her off, ready to drag her along with me.

"Oh, you're right!" I laughed because I was sure she had forgotten. "See you guys later!"

Just as we started walking, Jeremiah said, "I'll take her."

"Are you sure?" I asked, holding my smirk.

"Yeah, totally fine." Jeremiah stepped in and hooked arms with Belly. "I was going in that direction anyway." The two rushed up to the beach house. Belly's laugh rang as they walked further and further away.

Jeremiah had always been good to Belly, staying behind this one time because she was sick. He's always been sweet, but he had never looked at Belly the way he does now. I wondered if her becoming pretty was what made him look at her in a different way, in a romantic way. I wanted to be wrong, maybe I had missed it all of the other years before.

But I'm not sure that they are anything more than platonic. Yeah, Jeremiah is good, but I don't think he's good enough for Belly. Well, maybe it's just me. Since, to me, Belly deserves the world, and I'm not quite sure that Jeremiah could give her that.

This whole speech, some might disagree with me, even have a completely different opinion on it, but I see it. I see the way Jeremiah used to look at her, and I see how that changed. In just one summer, I assume.

"What are you thinking about?" Kenny asked.

"Did you just see that?" My eyes narrowed at nothing.

"See what?" He looked at me confused.

"Jeremiah was just looking at Belly with this kind of look." I seemed speechless. "Quién se cree este pendejo?" Who does he think he is?

"Woah there, Sonny. Don't be pulling out the Spanish that I so clearly don't understand."

"Woah there, Kenny. I really hope you take some Spanish classes in college, because you're hopeless at this point." I mocked him. He didn't enjoy it when I did that, but I loved it. "I said, who does this pendejo think he is?"

"Sometimes I question your protectiveness."

"Question it how?" I asked.

"I don't know. Jealousy?" He said, which I responded by laughing at his terrible joke, only Kenny didn't laugh. Meaning that it wasn't a joke, and that he actually believed I liked Belly, in a way that I have never ever liked Belly. "Forget I even mentioned it."

"No, you're going to tell me right now," I said, my tone furious.

"I have always believed that you had this crush on her." I laughed again.

I finally controlled my laughing, and muttered, "are boys really that stupid?" He didn't answer, so I continued, "boys cannot differentiate between platonic and romantic feelings, can they? And you, Kenny, just proved my exact point because what I feel for Belly is completely platonic. She's like my sister, blood. Are you suggesting incest, Kenny?"

"What! No, of course not!" He practically yelped. "Do you really think boys can't tell the difference between platonic and romantic feelings?"

"You tell me." I said. "Have you ever over thought that our friendship might've been more than just a friendship, and when did it happen?"

"No," he said, but I gave him a look, knowing that he was lying. "Fine. We were fourteen. You and I went to the beach for a swim. I thought about you differently for a second. Only for a second, though. Then I realized that we could never be more than friends. We would not work. We're too much alike. It'll be like dating myself."

"Kendrick, my other half." I smiled, not mentioning our prior conversation because I think he got my point, and I didn't exactly know what to tell him after that. "Your name sounds so professional and cool."

"That is why I am quitting the whole Kenny thing as soon as I get into college." He said, also completely not mentioning it. "Imagine being a surgeon, thirty-something and they call you Kenny. All that college for that. Yeah, no."

"You can thank your mother for that." We both laughed. "I like Ricky better."

"Oh god no."

"Can we go swim now?" I asked. "The mosquitoes are killing me."

"Yeah, let's go." Kenny wrapped his arm around my shoulders and we both started walking towards the beach club pool. "We don't want Princess Sonny to get a couple of mosquito bites, now do we?"

"Shut up, Ricky."

"Why aren't you ready for Laurels book party?"
I asked as Belly leaped onto my bed, her face smashing into my mattress. "Is something the matter?"

I finished applying my lipgloss before I finally made it beside her.

She mumbled something that was completely incomprehensible.

"I have no idea what you just said." I laughed, while rubbing her back gently, like a mother would, not mine, but you get it. "How about you get up and actually tell me what's going on, so I can actually help you?"

Belly sat up. "Cameron asked me to the drive-in tonight."

"No he didn't." I was at a loss for words. So much that it took me a second to think of words, but when I did, they didn't want to stop. "When did you see him? Was it at the beach club? What exactly happened? How did he ask you? Oh my god, Bellybutton is going on her real first date, with an adorable sounding guy, oh this is so cute."

"You sound more excited than I do." Belly laughed, hard.

"Because I am!" I almost squealed. "When and how did he ask you? Tell me everything because—"

"Your chisme, is my chisme, we share our chisme. I know, I know. Just give me a moment because I'm just now processing it myself." She sighed, catching her breath.

"My little friend is finally catching up!" I said, jokingly.

"Shut it." Belly smiled, proudly. "Okay, well... there was Paige, giving us this big speech about what it truly is to be a deb, then Shayla started passing around this flask, of whatever it was, around the table. When the flask finally got to Nicole, she offered me some. I declined her offer, of course, and when I turned towards the doors, I saw Cam walk just past the door."

"Okay..."

"You have no idea how fast I managed to make it to the door, he was already walking down the steps." Belly began again. "Then we started talking about wistfulness, and how wistful I was because I had missed his boat, that I would continue being wistful. That's when he asked me to the drive in to 'end my wistfulness'" She sighed again, only this time she did so, dreamily.

"I can't deal with the cute summer high school romance, it's too much." I sighed too. "How about we get you dressed? What time did you guys agree on?"

"He'll be here in an hour and a half."

"We've got to hurry then."

An hour and half was definitely not enough, but I made do with whatever we had. We were done in an hour. Now we were in Susannah's room, searching for Belly's favorite lipstick she used to sneak on when we were younger. Something Laurel would yell at her for because, you're too young to wear makeup.

"You both look so stunning." Susannah said with her heartwarming smile. She turned to look at Belly for this, "You are gonna have so much fun tonight, Belly."

"We're just going to see a movie." Belly said, practically blushing.

That's when Laurel walked in, I took it as my cue to leave. I didn't want to be a part of the whole—sorry mom, I'm not going to your book party because I'm going on this date with this guy, and I can't just say no—conversation.

"I'll be downstairs." I said, rushing out the door. I could feel Belly's glare on my back.

I made it downstairs to see that the boys were playing video games. "Do you guys do anything but play those stupid games?"

"Games you used to beg us to play." Steven responded.

"That's because you guys make it look fun, which is the complete opposite of what they actually are." I sat down beside Josh, snatching the controller from his hands.

"Sonny, what the hell!" He tried to take it back, but failed miserably.

"Déjame mostrar a estos niños que no se metan conmigo, Jo." Let me show the boys that they should mess with me. He didn't question me, and he gave me the controller without even a second thought. He has always been like that, letting things go too fast, when it was something easy. Like this, but when it came to other things, he wasn't quite good at letting things go quickly.

My focus was on the screen, but then Belly showed up. "See you guys later," she said.

I gave the control back to Josh, which he quickly brought his attention back to the screen, and not at Belly. "What did Laurel say about this whole thing?"

"Nothing." She responded with a shrug.

"Damn!" Jeremiah almost whistled. He quickly got up from his side of the couch and walked right up to Belly.

"Are you kidding? No." Steven started. "Yeah, fine, just abandon the game completely, Jere."

"You. Look. Hot." He spun Belly around.

"Hey, hey, hey, stop flirting with my sister." Steven's attention wasn't on the TV anymore. It was on Jeremiah.

"Shut up, Steven." Belly said, annoyed.

"No, you shut up." Steven was about to turn back the screen, but then instead turned back around to look at Belly a second more. "Well, you look good, though."

"You driving with, or are you meeting us there?" Jeremiah ignored everyone else in the room.

"I'm not going to the book party. I'm going to the drive-in." Belly smiled up at him.

"With who?" My brother cut in.

"Josh, I swear to god, if you don't point those stupid eyes on the damn screen!" Steven almost yelled. "We already have Mr. Lover boy over there trying to gain points from my sister, not you too man."

"Sorry." Josh quickly followed Stevens orders.

"Okay, bye." Belly waved me goodbye, and started walking towards the door.

"Have fun!" I yelled out, but it was too late, she was already out the door.

"Donde va?" Where is she going, Josh asked, eyes still on the TV.

"Qué te importa. Go back to your game." I stood up and rushed to the door. Once I had it opened, I yelled out, "Cameron, make sure you have her home by ten o'clock!"

"Go away, Sonny!" Belly yelled back, embarrassed.

"You're growing up too fast!" I yelled, before shutting the door. I know I was going to get shit for this later, but it was so worth it. Embarrassing Belly has always been one of my favorite hobbies.

I made it back to the couch.

"Who is she going with?" Jeremiah causally tried to ask.

"Why are both of you so persistent on knowing where Belly is going, it's really none of your business. Just Belly's." I paused. "And mine."

"Pinche chismosa, Sonny!" Fucking gossip, Sonny!

"Do y'all ever get tired of leaving us out of your conversations?" Jeremiah asked.

"No le digas nada, Jo." Don't say anything, Jo, I said to Josh, not letting my expression give myself off. "Solo mírame y luego... ríete." Just look at me and then... laugh. We both burst out laughing, out of nowhere. The boys turned to look at us like we were crazy and out of our minds.

"They totally just talked major shit, Jere." Conrad laughed.

"Are you two making fun of me?" Jeremiah seemed betrayed. "Josh, tell me what Sonny said, tell me!"

"That's for me and my sister's ears, not yours."

"Fuck off." Jeremiah threw a pillow at us. "You guys aren't driving with us."

"Who said that?" Conrad spoke, continuing to strum into his guitar. "Last I checked, I was driving. Sonny and Josh coming with, no matter if your stupid little feelings are hurt."

Steven's laugh roared loudly. "Conrad, we've missed you man." He slapped Conrad's back so hard that I winced myself.

AUTHORS NOTE:
what are we thinking so far? this update took later than needed, i know. i've been doing jack shit for the past couple weeks, but this update is finally out!!

hope everyone is okay and doing well!!

-ria

p.s. i love you all!! thank you so much for 4k <33