eight: jamais vu

"Please give me a remedy. A remedy that will make my heart beat again. What should I do now?"

//

Elianna takes the first shot.

Talulah laughs, eyes blurring with giddiness as she takes takes both incoming glasses from the waiter. she thanks him with a loud voice, downing the drinks.

"that was supposed to be mine." Elianna glares but her eye twitches as a burp escapes her mouth. she orders another round of drinks for her and Talulah. it's ten am...

"i love this. i love you." Elianna laughs loudly as she leans forward, hand squeezing Talulah's shoulder. the music at the bar is quiet, jazz playing but inside their heads, loud, pop music is playing and the alcohol is hitting them in the most powerful way.

"we're crazy to be drinking at this time." Talulah mentions as she flicks her hair over her shoulder only for it to come back in her face. she starts to giggle with no reason, screaming in delight when their drinks arrive.

Elianna is aware of the people observing their drunken states. the truth is, no one drinks at this time but they had nothing else better to do. "oh sister, we have things to forget and what better time than now?" she raises her glass, urging Talulah to say cheers.

Talulah squeals excitedly as they toast to themselves, which they don't do often. before Elianna can go on a crazed rant about how women should appreciate themselves everyday, Talulah speaks first, "since when do you live in the present so much?"

"ha! i do not." Elianna slaps her thigh with a chuckle. she plays with the small ponytail in her hair before lighting up a cigarette. "i'm trying though... our friends make me a better person." they do. they inspire her, whether it's Elisa's gentleness or Taehyung's wisdom. they all show good elements of themselves despite their lack of perfection.

they're a brilliant, imperfect group.

"a butter person?"

"what? did i say that? that's funny." the adult girls burst into uncontrollable laughter, repeating the word butter until their talkative tongues feel numb. the drunk, dizzy moment feels incredibly carefree but it only lasts for a few, short seconds.

"you should really give Jung-"

Jung Hoseok a hug? sure.

a group of men interrupt the drinking girls who have a day off from work. "hi ladies." they greet with civil but intentional smiles. one winks and the other observe. "may we offer you a ride?"

Talulah grins, mouth falling open for extra drama. a ride? she leans forward, hand pressing against her chin as she pretends to be interested and oblivious. "a ride on what exactly?"

"on my-"

Elianna throws her drink in their faces.

she's not having any of it, she thinks as she sits back and watches them flinch. the men stare back at her with glaring eyes, shaking off the liquid that now covers their upper halves. the female just smiles back, waving her hand without saying a word. she likes that about herself- her movements and actions speak for her.

"i was going to say my motorbike! what is wrong with you?"

Talulah bursts out into giggles once again and pays the bartender before taking Elianna's hand, leading them out of the place they had grown tired of. they both agree to head to one of their apartments and finish their little party in the privacy of their own homes.

the girls walk along the street with no care in the world. they don't link arms, they stay close by each other's side until Elianna tells Talulah to wait. "be right back." she mentions, entering the store on her left.

Elianna's mind is fuzzy but she recognises the girl in the tech store. she makes sure Talulah stands outside and she does, using her phone for entertainment. Elianna however, walks into the store and approaches the girl.

a memory floats into her head at the sight of the girl. drunk eyes bore into the back of her head. it is her. Jin's arguing voice at Elianna saying the truth of, "i know she won't talk to you." is remembered as she thinks about how Jin never talks about his Valentina. after all this time, he hasn't forgiven himself for whatever happened. Elianna doesn't know since Jin won't talk, he's closed off.

so Elianna goes up to Valentina who's back is turned. "excuse me," she tries to keep her voice stable, not wanting to show her drunkenness. Jin's ex girlfriend is purchasing a camera as she turns around, hair whipping. "you don't know me but i'm Elianna. i'm friends with Jin." she offers a smile.

the smile isn't returned, just silence. she's like me, Elianna thinks. tough cookie.

Elianna tries not to fidget with her jacket as she tugs her sleeves over hands. "Jin doesn't know i'm here." she feels the need to explain to the expressionless female. "but he thinks of you often, i know that for sure."

Elianna continues despite Valentina not saying anything. "i don't know anything about what happened between you two but all i know... is that it impacted him as well as you." she says honestly, eyes determined to get some sort of reply from the quiet lady.

"i guess i was just wondering if you'd ever speak to him again?" Elianna questions. it's worth a shot. Jin's always annoyed with her anyway, let him be. "so you can both clear the air? it would mean a lot to him."

Valentina's hands clutch the camera in her hands. "it would?" she repeats, taking in Elianna's words.

Elianna nods, "yes very much."

"could you tell him-"

//

the late afternoon now reveals a much more sober Elianna. after bidding farewell to sleeping Talulah, she walks into Jin's empty, decorated house, one that was an enjoyable home to many of her parties. she has a message to deliver to her male friend which is why she made the effort to come.

so after having a nap and sorting out her thoughts, no longer with dull alcohol in her system, she kicks off her shoes. the boy greets her back, noticing her headache. he stops his cooking. "here, drink the water too." he places a familiar tablet in her hand before placing a glass of water down.

Elianna's golden eyes fill up with love as she watches her older brother care for her. she takes a seat on the couch, staring at the medicine. "do i have to?"

"yes bitch."

Elianna rolls her eyes and takes the tablet before finishing her glass of water quickly. "we've been arguing a lot i know... but please don't hate me." she starts, making sure Jin is sat down before she tells him the news. she doesn't know what reaction to expect from him, will he be mad? irritated? will he tell her to leave? it's going to take her forever to put her trainers back on...

"i saw Valentina."

Elianna feels anxiety coarse through her veins. she's been in such a situation before and although she's known Jin for the longest time, the closeness between them is what makes her anxious. she never wants to put herself in a position where they could lose each other, especially because of her. "i know you don't want to talk about her." she says, heart racing.

Elianna runs her hands through her dark, short strands and observes Jin's reaction. he doesn't react the way she expected him to. he's calm, thoughtful as he acknowledges her words with a slow nod before he speaks.

"did you see her? talk to her?"

"yeah," Elianna breathes out. "she said she's happier now and she'd love it if you could catch up."

"she wanted you to know that she thinks of you and wishes you all the best." Elianna adds, noticing the small smile gracing over Jin's lips. she wishes he'd share the story of what happened with the photographer but his lips are sealed, another secret that'll come out one day. "she mentioned how she knows you should go fuck yourself but you should forgive yourself too."

"it seems like she's made her peace."

Elianna can't tell if Jin is contemplating whether or not to forgive himself. she doesn't know why he'd need to be forgiven... she has some idea but that's an assumption.

//

Jungkook converses with Hoseok at his dance studio. he admires one of his many role models, his hyung as he dances to the music. he's currently planning a short routine for the dance rehearsal, going through tracks and being as focused as ever.

Jungkook feels slightly intimidated when Hoseok clenches his jaw and crosses his arms over his chest as he bops his head to the classical music. he changes from pop to classical and then to jazz, he's going through a checklist Shira had made and trying to decide what would be the best music. when it comes to music and dance, Hoseok is another person and it's admirable.

Jungkook knows that if Jin was here, he'd be afraid to make eye contact with the dance master Hoseok but the younger is curious so he speaks, "Shira really wants to go all out huh?" he asks. "asking for a routine, a dance rehearsal from the king himself?"

"yep, it's going to be a slow dance routine." Hoseok explains, flashing a smile at the seated boy.

"i'm thinking about a scene from this Netflix show."

"oh, what show?" Hoseok asks, tapping a pen against his bare arm.

"ah! it's called Anne with an E... like there's this dance scene where me and Taehyung just couldn't stop squealing." Jungkook expresses his excitement. slow dances are something he's never properly experienced. he's not sure what to expect or learn.

"sounds beautiful JK."

"it is bro."

"anyway..." Hoseok sighs, gazing at the checklist on the wooden floorboards. "this is fancier than my wedding and i had a rich guy paying for mine." he starts the music again.

Jungkook leaves him to work away, watching him experiment with certain slow dance routines to the perfect song. he moves his hips, hands pointing and shoulders raising. the younger, black haired one continues to do what he's been doing...

and that's playing with Esmerelda- Elisa and Hoseok's child.

"shall we play superheroes?"

Jungkook gasps before a toothy grin takes over his wakeful face as he sits up eagerly. his legs stay crossed as his hands clap. "who from marvel do you want to be?" he questions, hoping she doesn't say iron man. he crosses his fingers, wanting the girl to know his excitement as he waits for her response with wide, beige eyes.

Esmerelda pouts her lips, accidentally bumping her nose into Jungkook's as they giggle. "you be captain marvel and i'll be the hulk."

"oh my gosh, yes!" Jungkook cheers and pretends to chase her.

he collapses onto the floor as she climbs on top of him, pretending to bang her fists against her chest. "have mercy! i am the strongest avenger of all time." they continue to play fight (Jungkook lets himself get beaten up by the unusually strong kid).

"don't you think you should patch things up with Elianna?"

Jungkook stares up at Hoseok from lying on his back. he blinks in surprise, throat going dry before he sits up. he brings over the action figures and dolls, gesturing for Es to come play. he thinks about a response, not expecting Hoseok to turn so serious and to bring such a topic to his attention.

"don't you think i've tried?" Jungkook sighs, playing whilst talking to Esmerelda's father who suddenly seems concerned.

"it's tiring hyung." Jungkook focuses on his action figure, he moves its robotic hands and legs. he licks his lips, black hair curving away from his eyes. "she keeps pushing me away... maybe it's meant to be this way. no closure you know?" he thinks since he's lost all hope in terms of Elianna.

thoughtful Hoseok stays silent. he's about to say something after thinking but his wife comes into the room. "hey Kook and Es." Elisa waves, flat shoes tapping their way over to them. "i got you both snacks from the vending machine."

Elisa bends down and watches Jungkook tear open the packet for the small, waiting girl. she sits on her bottom, small hands feeding herself. the mother watches her friend with fond eyes before placing her hand on his leg. "you're a good guy. she'll come around i know it." she reassures Jungkook who smiles softly. "now stop stressing."

"yes ma'am."

Jungkook appreciates Elisa. she's full of positivity, calmness and kindness. as well as being a good daughter, wife, mother, she's a great friend. the hope he had thought had faded returns and he realises, no, he doesn't want to give up on Elianna. not now, not ever. he'll fight for a second chance.

"come on, let's dance and get this frown off your face." Elisa offers both of her hands to Jungkook and Es as Hoseok turns up the music. Es, who's just like Jungkook just stares and continues to eat her snacks.

in that musical moment, Jungkook knows he can get through anything. the universe is always showing him exactly what to be thankful for and today, like everyday, is his friends.

//

Elianna takes her cue to go on a smoking break as soon as Jimin and Zelda start a lively conversation. she's been spending more time with them at the florist so she can help with the new opening and the marketing that comes afterwards.

so she stands outside, back covered in leather as she leans against the white brick wall. from outside of the curtained window, she can hear her friends' smiles as they chatter and she lights up her cigarette.

Elianna watches the smoke erupting from her cigarette. she presses her lips against the stick and inhales the nicotine. although she doesn't smoke as much anymore, every time she does, the relief is always evident.

she crosses one arm over her chest whilst she smokes with the other. her view of the street opposite is one with street lights, people busy with their weekday night as the moonlight shines among the stores that are closing. she watches through the smoky breath.

then a figure blocks Elianna's sight. she furrows her brows, blowing out her smoke in coughing surprise when she realises who the firm, glaring female staring at her is.

"really won't talk to me huh?"

Elianna lowers her hand, stretching it out along her side. she listens to Fleur as the beady, green eyed female stares right into her very own eyes. "i'm the bad one right? i'm the one who started it all?" she spits out rhetorically, barely any space between their bodies.

"screw you." Fleur doesn't give Elianna a chance to speak before she walks away, head held high as her middle finger raises in the air.

"you do you, i guess." Elianna mutters.

the female furrows her brows and brings her cigarette to her lips slowly. that was confusing... unusual. where has Fleur been all this time? she's aware that she lost contact with the past female friend a while ago but she didn't know she'd be so irritated by it.

Elianna shrugs and continues to smoke.

however, another disruption occurs as she notices the door of Two Euphoric Hearts slamming open. the cafe is busy with quiet guests but the one that storms out is angry and... familiar. Elianna stands up straight, no longer leaning against the wall as she watches.

Elianna squints, eyes flashing in recognition so she quickly stubs out her cigarette and makes her way over to the situation.

even being next to the cafe makes her anxious and Elianna isn't one to let her nerves get to her.

a tall male with black hair runs after the girl and Elianna sighs. Jin's chasing after Valentina who just angrily left the cafe. so much for talking to each other? forgiving one another?

Elianna stands near the cafe entrance, observing the duo from afar as Valentina continues to walk away from Jin who's calling her name. "can we talk? Valentina, Val!" the bell chimes and of course, the manager of the place steps out into the frosty air.

Jungkook stands next to Elianna as they both stare at their friend's attempts to talk to someone he had done wrong.

"are we just a gang of difficult love stories?"

Elianna wasn't expecting to talk to her ex boyfriend today and he's being accurately wise. "perhaps we are." she replies. aren't all love stories difficult? "this is sad to watch." she adds, in parallel sync with Jungkook as they both cross their arms over their chests and continue to watch the difficult, once love story? one is dressed in an apron and the other in a casual jacket.

"what do you think will happen?" Jungkook asks, cologne wafting off of him as he licks his lips. his hair falls in front of his eyes after a long working day. he seems tired, Elianna glances at him, noticing how the moonlight brings out the ebony darkness of his orbs. once again, the gold freckles are there and always will be.

"Jin will stop running." Elianna predicts.

Jungkook snickers and Elianna smirks when Jin does in fact, stop running. he's still shouting but stops to say something, the ex couple can't hear.

Valentina isn't happy with his words which is why she turns around, walking up to the taller and older one and pushes him back harshly.

"oh shit, i didn't expect that." Jungkook hisses under his breath as they watch Jin stumble back. from their angle, all they can see is the fury in Valentina's eyes as she walks again.

Jin does indeed, let her walk away in silence.

Elianna can't get over the fact that she's speaking to Jungkook but she can't stop. they're having a regular conversation that makes them feel like humans as they watch their friend in crisis. "i knew he'd never walk after her."

"love makes shit sad." Jungkook says.

"do you want to come in-"

Elianna turns her head to look at Jungkook closely. his eyes are innocent as they blink at her. she notices the coffee stains on his sleeves, the chains hanging on his belt loop, the earphones falling out of his pocket as well as his eyelashes, sharp jawline and pink lips. she can't help but still see the young, university student she fell in love with.

he's the same.

"no thanks Jungkook." she murmurs and walks away.

//

i mean ☕️☕️☕️

love doesn't make shit sad it's the people

i personally think elianna has every right to be cold to kook??

but like can they just kiss and make up

comment some of your favourite bts songs :))