Nicole is in the kitchen; music is playing, and my senses are hit with the sweet aroma of freshly brewed coffee. I join in to help, and it feels really good, just hanging out...being together. We joke around, playing, laughing, and talking, and of course, I can't keep my hands off her. I almost get her up on the counter, but she's hungry, so I stop. Shit, I'm hungry too but not for pancakes. We hang out together the rest of the day and I finally, and I do mean finally, get my ass up out of there at 11 o'clock that night. Actually, I did try a few times to leave, but we somehow kept ending up back in bed. I finally left her though, but only because she told me she had court in the morning.

Our date is definitely one for the books as far as I'm concerned, because I never do this. That thing of only satisfying the woman...I don't know where the hell that came from. Maybe I said that because I don't want her to feel like sex is all I want from her...I want her to know that her needs matter to me. I want her to see that she comes first...always. Fuck...this woman has me twisted, for real.

I pull in front of my condo Sunday night, sit in my car to check my text from Lauren, and I'm glad I didn't see it before my date. My head would've been messed up. Instead of Lauren giving me her usual bitchy side, she goes in a direction that takes me completely off guard.

*hey Dev so look, i hope i can spend some time with u when u come 2 visit...maybe we can hang out like a family...i really miss what we used 2 have so i hope we can try again...u know we owe Ethan 2 try to 2 be a family...he deserves it...he's still a baby...miss u...call me soon xoxo*

Did she just hit me with the xoxo? What the hell is this all about? That girl knows we can't be together. Shit, the only thing we ever did well was make Ethan. Would it make me look like I don't love my boy if I don't even try to be a family for him? Shit...her timing couldn't be any worse. I slam my hand on the steering wheel "FUCK!!"

Taking a few deep breaths, I close my eyes and rest my head on the back of the seat. Eventually, I head inside, still feeling pissed. Maybe a shower and a beer will help clear my mind so I can think. Why does she need to do this now? All I can think about is Nicole. I finally find someone who I really think I want to invest my time and emotions in, and then this. I can't drag her into this shit when I don't even know what the hell is going on. Maybe I should talk to Lauren or see how things go when I get out there but is that leading Nicole on? Oh hell...I can't do that.

The shower is calling my name, so I jump in and turn the water on as hot as I can stand it. My skin doesn't like it, but it's helping to clear my mind. Finishing up, I dry off, slip on some sweats, and head into the kitchen to grab a beer. I already know the answer. I can't be with Lauren, and it has nothing to do with Nicole...well, maybe a little, but I know that being with Lauren will never work. Every time we try to make anything work between us, it doesn't. It never did from the beginning, so that's it.

End of story.