Hero was hurting.

And Nabiel was well aware of that.

He knew the moment he stayed in his nest, he felt negativity and emotions he had never felt before flood through his bond with his counterpart. The feelings shook him to the point where he had a panic attack. Roderich woke and immediately attended to him, holding him close and making sure he breathed smoothly.

Nabiel had ditched resting in his nest to walk his study to calm down. Roderich had wanted to join him, but stayed behind, giving his master space. The white walls were stained with ugly shades of green, and Nabiel felt sluggish. His wings were drooping low and weak, and his tail dragged across the floor when he walked. He grew weaker, and the intrusive thoughts he had at night grew stronger.

Roderich had saved him from stabbing himself with his scythe. He couldn't help it. It was his first time experiencing excruciating pain. It wasn't physical. It was mental and emotional, which was far more worse in his opinion.

His only lifelines were his will to actually meet his counterpart and Roderich. The demon had stayed with him 24/7, not even leaving to stay dormant in Nabiel's weapons. He had read his counterpart's life scroll- for the lack of a better term -and the original script were angrily scribbled out by dark green ink. On top of the dark green ink, were letters that spelled out: He became a puppet.

Every night, when Derrek led Hero's body to take another innocent victim, Nabiel felt the pain, he felt the horror, he felt the disgust. His counterpart had blamed himself for everything Derrek had done.

Speaking of Derrek, Nabiel did his best to find out who he was and where he came from. When he requested his name out loud to his shelves, hundreds of scrolls from the 'D' section came, depicting the destinies and lives of several Minecraftian residents named Derrek. None of them were him, though.

The third time he asked for Derrek, a crack was heard and Nabiel watched before his eyes as a white streak formed in front of him, and opened up. A portal. He called Roderich back to his side and asked him to stay in his scythe. He protested against the idea of stepping through the portal; they had no idea where it led to.

Nabiel was persistent. Whatever it was, it probably led to Derrek's life, a huge step for them to take down that monster and let Hero stop feeling all that... Pain.

Eyes full of determination, and feeling stronger than he ever had these past few days, Nabiel stepped through.

○

Nabiel found himself knee-deep in clouds. At first, he thought he was in the Aether, his true home. He then found out he did not feel the familiar and comforting pull of home. His wings rose to stretch out behind him by themselves, and they flared out, contrasting against the bright white of where ever he was.

Then Roderich started snarling.

He was making disgusting inhumane sounds. Nabiel felt him claw at the border keeping him in the scythe. When he tried to ask what was wrong, Roderich's face appeared in Nabiel's head. Nabiel had never seen his usually chipper friend so angry and feral. The red slits of his eyes were narrowed till he had to strain to see them. They were glowing a fierce red, and he was baring the canines his demon blood had given him.

Roderich was drooling. He was growling at Nabiel, his master. Nabiel broke out of his concerned stupor and demanded what had happened to his friend.

All Roderich could utter in between snarls of fury were, "Angels... Disgusting... Kill."

Then Nabiel heard a gasp behind him. He swerved around, some stray black feathers dropping onto the clouds. There was a woman, her thin slender body decorated with a thin robe connected from one shoulder to one hip. It kept her dignity though a tad too revealing. She had golden curly locks that fell to her shoulders. She had rather mystical yellow eyes. They seemed to glow. She was gorgeous. What caught Nabiel's attention, though, were the pearl white wings stretching from her back.

Her delicate fingers covered her rose red lips in shock, and when Nabiel stepped forward, she stepped back. Shaking from her shocked daze, she pulled something from her back, a lance. It was the same color as her wings, but the blade was pointing at Nabiel.

"S-Stay away, you filthy mixed blood!"

Nabiel felt his tail stirring in anger. His wings, resting on his back, flared out again. They were bigger than hers, and she cowered a little underneath the shadows of his wings. The bright light had given his feathers a pretty silver sheen. Nabiel readied his scythe, that glowed red with Roderich's support despite his... Situation.

He tried to soften the features on his face, but he honestly couldn't. The mask that he built, one of ferocity and hostility, was firm. He tried to ask politely, "I'm just looking for someone. I won't hurt anyone."

She grew braver, however and stabbed the lance forward. Nabiel did not move from his spot, his narrowed eyes challenging her to even harm him. She stepped back again. Her melodious voice was shaking again, "Y-You brought one of those vile things! You're a traitor as well!"

The snarls from Roderich grew louder. Was she talking about him? Nabiel tightened his grip around Roderich in a comforting way and the growls grew softer. There was the occasional grunt. He calmly spoke, his allure coming out in his smooth and sultry voice, "He won't hurt anyone. We won't hurt anyone. Just let as pass without harm and-"

She shook her head and snapped, "Only those who are pure and clean from sickening blood are allowed in this paradise. You are not pure. You are a fallen angel, a corrupted one. Your wings are charcoal instead of pearls, and you have the blood of our enemies running in your veins. You are a traitor, you have betrayed your kind. You and that pesky little trash of yours are here to take and never give. Be gone!"

She stabbed forward, and it actually pierced through Nabiel's chest. Roderich let out a roar. Nabiel did not move, and looked down the lance. He felt no pain. He was trained for this. His body was a weapon. Black blood seeped from the wound, and trailed down the lance. The sizzle of the acidic blood burned the pure white lance and burned away all the clouds as it dripped. The angel screamed and pulled her weapon back. Smoke was rising from her lance. His acidic blood had partially burnt the weapon.

"I will be back to find the answers I've been looking for. None of you will stop me."

He stood to his full height despite being shorter than the angel and his wings spread out regally. He narrowed his eyes as he declared, "I am a representative of the Aether. Nothing will ever stand in the MRA's way."

All he could see in the woman's eyes were recognition, before horror and finally fear. If he could not get his information here, he would try else where then. Nabiel turned around and the white portal appeared again. He gave one last glare at the woman, who shrank back, before stepping through.

He finally let down the barrier keeping Roderich still and the demon appeared with a red flash. He leaped and rolled on the ground before landing on both feet. He was standing in a defensive position in front of Nabiel, and he still looked feral. He let out a snarl and swiped forward with his claws. Nabiel, out of angel instinct, dodged the blow by hastily flapping his wings to lift himself from the ground and away from Roderich.

"Snap out of it, you," snapped Nabiel as he smacked Roderich up the head. Brilliant technique to get a rabid creature and citizen of the underworld to calm down.

Roderich stiffened under the gesture and rubbed sheepishly at his head. His ragged breathing calmed down before he swirled to Nabiel, surprising the angel briefly. He did not show it, of course. "Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"

Nabiel softened (just a bit!) and shook his head. Roderich seemed to relax a little after that. He bowed his head and kneeled before his master, and whispered, "Please forgive me."

Nabiel resisted the urge to roll his eyes and just helped Roderich back to his feet. He replied softly, "I know that all your actions are for the best. Nothing you say or do will truly make me mad." He looked ashamed for a moment before his straight mask was in place once again. "You are all I have as company for now."

Roderich flashed a great smile down at his master. Nabiel raised an eyebrow at him. Nonetheless, the demon knew that was the angel's version of a smile. He then took in the darkening green stains on the once white walls. He muttered under his breath, "For now and for many years to come. If your resting plane is like this, you counterpart's should be worse."

Nabiel followed his gaze sadly. "I know. Don't worry, we will be able to see the outside world soon if I can find out how to possess something in the Aether. Maybe then I can communicate and interact with the world beyond my astral plane."

Roderich did not notice the way he had his arm draped over his master's shoulder in an informal way. Nabiel also did not notice his absence of a reaction to it. They just stood there, wishing for the best of their future friend, and for Nabiel, future brother in all but blood.

○

Self-loathing happens occasionally to everyone, but they always get up.

But in Hero's situation, the self-hatred grows even worse every passing night. Derrek, the motherfucker, would take over his body with force and go out to take an innocent life, laughing as Hero cried for the lives he took away with his own hands. Every night, after Derrek was satisfied with his work, he would teleport Hero to his room, blood stained and dirty, before disappearing.

Each night, Hero would crawl helplessly to the bathroom to try his best to feel clean, to feel good. All his efforts go to waste as he sits curled up on the bathroom floor surrounded by blood of his victims. He was exhausted, but his trauma-induced nightmares were something he desperately wanted to avoid. If he fell asleep and had a nightmare, he would wake up having an anxiety attack. All alone.

His nightmares were about him in the midst of war, surrounded by endless rows of the deceased. Among them would be his brother, friends, soldiers, just everyone he knew. He would be the only one left standing, his enemies having retreated, leaving him to fight for his side alone. Each nightmare, he would always fuck up something in the battle, which ended up killing one of his own. It was terrifying. One of the uncommon nightmares were about his father, having suffered from his abuse. The hitting and scarring would occur all over again, him being a small boy, which is anything but a soldier.

Even when awake, sometimes gunshots from the shooting range triggered a flashback would result in Hero politely excusing himself to calm his breathing and shock. However, when he was the one holding the rifle, he needs complete focus to be able to fire decently without a flashback. Markus had asked him several times to see a doctor about this condition, but to no avail. Besides, even Derrek ordered him not to consult one. He had to obey.

His enhanced senses picked up unwanted conversations, like when he heard Jeb ask Markus whether Hero was alright. He heard Markus come up with some shit excuse every single time Hero's health was brought up, but this time Markus answered truthfully.

"I honestly don't know, Jeb. I haven't seen him eat for a few weeks now. I heard from the guards that he was more merciless nowadays."

"Do you reckon he just eats in secret? And we both know that he has a temper for his soldiers."

"He does, but he still takes care of them. You know our friend in the underground, Monty? He signed up for Hero's army. He got in but recently he was diagnosed with cancer. From what I've heard, he's been real sad in his duties. Hero approached him and asked him to meet him in his office. I don't know what goes on in there, but Monty was back to his regular self since. He'll be on medical leave soon, though."

"He's not talking to us anymore, y'know. I somewhat miss Hero."

"Same here."

Hero had cut himself from the conversation as Derrek had demanded he carry on to his room. After that, it was back to murdering every night, regretting his existence, seeing to his duties, watching Jeb and Markus look at him in concern and repeat.