I'd had to put the dream behind me, because afterall, wasn't it just a dream? My hand absentmindedly grabs my pendant every once in a while.. When I'm feeling sick, or scared. Which is everyday.

Fear doesn't seem to go away, and the thought makes me sick. I have an indent on my right palm of the lines of that are engraved on the ruby necklace. 

Every time I walk into the gym, and  I watch how people fight with one another, I feel scared. I feel scared because they act like it's nothing, and that it's easy. And it reminds me that them killing my family was nothing, and that it was easy. I try to close my eyes and think of my mother when I'm nervous. She was so brave.

Though it was merely a dream, I can't help but wonder if it meant something. I must have dreamt her because I missed her, right? I can't help but note how real it felt. Her voice, the sincerity in her eyes when she stressed the importance of the necklace.

"You've been zoning out all day," Jax whispered next to me. I stared at him with curiosity. He had his arms crossed as he watched the two fighters go at one another. The ring's ropes jostled as they threw punches, kicked, and body slammed.

Jax's eyes never left the ring as he spoke. He kept them focused on the way the fighters would move. As though he were to be analyzing them. But for what reason?

"Sorry," I muttered. He frowned. A few feet in front of us was Elijah and Baine. They often came to observe their fighters and their skills. They were under constant scrutiny. I wonder what would become of them should they not meet their Alpha's expectations. 

"Stop!" Elijah howled. Immediately, the boys in the ring stopped and waited for what was to happen.

"Jamie, your left hook is completely weaker than your right. If you leave one half of your body weaker than the other, then you're just as about as useful here as the shit on the floor." 

The boy, Jamie, hung his head and nodded.

"Loras," Baine added. The other boy's eyes snapped open to see his Alpha.

"You can't kick like you do. It's weak and even a kid could dodge it. None of your kicks, high or low, managed to work. I don't see a single bruise on Jamie except for his eye where you landed a punch."

I frowned, seeing much more than that. Scrapes and bruises seemed to be their skin. The bruise on Jamie's eye was just a nasty green and purple while the other bruises on his body were light blues. He had a cut on his lip and one on his eyebrow from where Loras had struck him. 

Loras's left eye was closed, and he couldn't open it due to swelling. 

"The two of you will continue to fight until we have a winner. Whoever succeeds will be able to join our ranks. We'll be watching," Elijah said to them, before he and his Alpha turned to walk away.

As the two left, Jamie crumpled onto the rope, and Loras placed his hands on his knees to help keep himself up.

I walked over to them, despite the glare from Jax.

Jamie had shaggy brown hair, and dull brown eyes. He couldn't have been older than 16. Loras had curly blonde hair that sat in a mop on his head. As I approached them, they stared at me with confusion.

"Are you two alright?" I asked. Their eyes widened. Jamie cast a glance at Elijah and Baine who were now watching a new couple spar. 

"Take a guess, lady," Jamie said with a huff. I examined his nasty bruise, and then Loras's shut eyeball. Loras, though he only had one good eye at the moment, examined me up and down.

"You. You're a Royale. Aren't you?" 

A Royale. That was what was known as the Alpha's children. I frowned, and looked behind me to find Jax, but he was now keeping his eyes on another fight.

"No." It was a lie and it was the truth. I was at one point in time, a Royale. Now, I was an orphan.

"Horse shit," Loras spat out. I didn't say anything as the two glared at me. 

"You're weird," Jamie added, brushing a hand through his messy hair. I guess I was. What was weirder than living with someone who was a murderer and having no say in the matter?

-

I had left the gym, and I didn't plan on going back.

It was all it took. I snapped. I couldn't do it. I just simply couldn't. He was so much worse than the stories. He was terrible. A monster through and through. I didn't understand how he was able to take the form of a man and wolf, when in reality I believed he should be hiding under a bed, with snake like eyes and long talons for fingers, waiting to strike.

I forced myself to run faster, and faster. My wolf, she wasn't strong, or quick. She wasn't much, but neither was I. Paw after paw, I kept going. They'd know I was missing soon. They always knew. They seemed to know everything.

4 hours ago

I cringed as Baine cornered me against the wall. "I don't want to be here anymore, just let me go!" I whined as fat tears rolled down my cheeks. His disgustingly black eyes scrunched up with wrinkles, showing me he was mad. 

"You think I care what you want?" 

I felt shameful. I was crying, sobbing even, with every emotion I had pouring out. Baine was calm, and tranquil.  It made my emotions soar out of control, more than ever. How could he be so calm? I was suffering, so much, and I was done.

"Why am I here?"

"Finally, she asks a question that isn't completely stupid!" He exclaimed with mock relief. I only cry more and cover my face. 

"You must think I'm a monster."

"That's because you are!"

"And you think I do it without a reason."

"You did! How can you sit there and pretend-"

"No. You're the one pretending." 

I snapped my eyes up to see him glaring at me. Me? How?

"I have the strongest pack in the US. So many members, so many allies, and so many enemies."

"What are you trying to say to me Baine?" I snapped. 

"Maybe your pack isn't as perfect as you think it is."

I reached my hand up, and knocked it against his cheek. He barely faltered and returned with a much more heated glare. 

"Don't you dare! Don't you ever say that! Don't you ever hint at me that my pack wasn't perfect! We were!" I reached my hand up again, but he caught it before I could even swing. He pulled me into his hard chest, making me squirm. I tried to fight him off. It wasn't going to work, he was so much stronger than I could ever even hope to be.

"Do your research, Elle. My pack is strong for reasons, and we do what we do for reasons. I'm over your constant accusations and pitiful whining."

"What the hell does that mean?" I flew my hands up in the air, but they were trapped in his build.

"Like I said. Do your research."

"I'm not taking any advice from you, you bastard!" I growled. 

"Fine. I'll tell you myself. You're adopted."

"You're just lying, something I'm sure you're used to."

"Don't believe me, find yourself some records!" 

"Get off!" 

And he did. He backed away with a cruel smirk on his face. I hate him. I hate him so much it consumes me. I feel the color red when I look at him. He fuels the fire that is disdain and hatred. 

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