Six squares forward and six squares back...

It was nearly eight o'clock and Emily hadn't heard back from Evan yet. All of her homework was done. So she paced the parquet floor in her room.

Maybe I misunderstood his choice of song this afternoon... Maybe he meant it as a goodbye...

Panic crept into the gnawing feeling that seemed her constant companion lately. She picked up her phone and googled the lyrics to make sure she wasn't wrong.

It even mentions getting married! I can't have mistaken things...

She closed her internet browser and tapped open her text messages. She stared at Evan's name. Her finger hovered above it while she thought about texting him again. But then she closed that too. Next she opened her phone contacts to call Jenny instead.

I still need to talk to her about the Peter ride debacle...

Jenny picked up on the first ring and didn't even say hello. "I was expecting you to call me earlier."

"I needed to think about things," Emily explained.

"What sort of things? Peter sort of things?" Jenny asked.

"Honestly, I didn't think much of Peter."

Jenny reprimanded, "That's not nice Em. He's not a bad guy."

Emily sighed and said, "That came out wrong. I didn't mean it that way. I meant that I was thinking of other things besides him. He seems nice enough. But I kind of have my hands full with Evan and Kelly stuff right now."

There was a distinctive "tsk" noise from Jenny.

"Did you just suck your teeth at me?" Emily asked to be sure.

Jenny mumbled, "I did Ms. Bionic Ears."

Emily stopped pacing and started folding a basket of clean laundry. "You come up with some crazy set-up plan and then you suck your teeth at me!"

"I was only trying to help. And it isn't crazy. It makes sense. You are the queen of logic, sense and order, so I thought you'd appreciate it."

Even though her best friend couldn't see what Emily was doing, she threw down the shirt she was folding in disgust.

I don't want to give any authority to Jenny's opinion of my methodical ways at the moment...

Jenny explained, "Since your life is here, you need a boy that's here too. You know, like the old saying that the easiest way to get over a guy is to get under another one. And Peter admitted to Geoff that he's intrigued by you."

"Translation. He thinks I'm weird. And the whole over-under thing is just plain gross Jen."

"That's not what I meant by it completely, but you get the idea. And intriguing can mean charming or fascinating. But right now I'm the person thinking that you're being weird. I'm sorry that I miscalculated things. Maybe you can tell me what part of the equation I missed out on?"

Emily took a deep breath. "I think I'm falling for Evan. Like real feelings, not just a crush or an infatuation."

There was silence on the other end of the phone. Then Jenny said, "Wow. I wasn't expecting that. Really?"

Emily flung herself onto her bed and the metal spring frame squeaked along with her. "I wish I was joking," she confessed, "but I can't help myself Jen. It's like... he really understands me. And even though we're different, we're alike where it counts. Strangely, it's kind of like our friendship. But since I'm hetero and he's hot, and I really, really like kissing him, it feels like... love... I think. It sucks to not be around him but I don't know what to do about that. I can't move to Jersey. Well I could, but you know what I mean. The whole situation is ridiculous and hopeless! I know it is. Nobody ends up marrying somebody they fall in love with when they are fifteen anyway...."

Jenny sighed. "My parents did."

Emily laughed. "Oh God, please tell me that doesn't mean you're going to marry Geoff."

"You never know," Jenny teased. Then she added, "But I don't have the type of feelings for him that you're describing you have for Evan. So I doubt it will end up at the altar of St. Anselm's."

Emily hung her head backwards off her bed and let the blood rush to her brain.

Jenny asked, "So what about Kelly?"

Emily squeaked again and rolled onto her stomach. "I'm going to have to... well not break-up with him exactly, since we aren't together. I guess 'let him down easy' as cliché as that sounds. But I know it's something I should do in person and I don't know when I'm going to see him again."

The phone vibrated against her face and Jenny started to say something but Emily stopped her. "One second. I'm getting a text."

Emily pulled the phone from her ear to see a thumbnail photo. She opened it to look at Evan on a bench in a locker room with ice taped to his shoulder, his eyes wide and eyebrows lifted hopefully.

I'm confused by this picture... In my experience, his happy expression doesn't match the situation where he is obviously injured...

She stared at it and studied it. Her contemplation only broken by Jenny's tiny voice calling out. "Helloooo. Emily did you forget about me?"

She went back to the call. "Sorry Jen. I got distracted by a text from Evan. I'll see you in the morning."

Jenny sighed again. "Okay then. Night Em."

Emily dropped the call and went back to send Evan a message.

Everything okay?

Evan wrote back.

Yeah. Just a long, hard practice tonight. No picture back? You always send me songs back for songs.

Emily felt her ears get hot and wondered how he could find a sore spot so accurately.

I hate selfies. Truth is I'm terrible at them. I blame my t-rex arms.

He sent back a meme of a t-rex with robot claws in his hands and the word 'Unstoppable' on it. Emily laughed so hard that she snorted.

Then his next message came through.

Picture please!

So she held one arm like a shortened claw and snarled furiously to send him a photo of her best t-rex impression. She read his response.

Attractive!

She typed.

You asked for it!

It took a few minutes for his next response to arrive.

So are you saying you'll give me what I ask for?

She read the words twice over. The second time made her stomach ache worse than the first time. Then his next message appeared.

Be my girlfriend.

She stared at the words while her heart began to race. If she wasn't already lying down she would have had to.

Why am I panicking? Evan already dominates my thoughts... I know I have feelings for him... Shouldn't I just say yes? Shouldn't this be a simple thing?

Her lack of response prompted another text from Evan.

So blackmail doesn't work and asking via text doesn't work. Hopefully third time's the charm!

Emily wrote.

You did say you were done with easy and I've never, ever been described as easy. In fact the word "difficult" has come up repeatedly in connection with me throughout my life.

She folded the edge of the pillowcase and rubbed it against her fingers as she read.

I'll call you when I get home.

An hour later her phone rang.

"I'm finally alone," Evan said when she answered.

"Well I've been alone for hours. My Mom is working and won't be home for at least another hour," she explained.

Then she added, "Actually that's not totally truthful. Max is here with me."

Evan chuckled and said, "Ah yes your pussy cat. Are you currently stroking your kitty?"

Emily felt her throat tighten and swallowed before she said, "No."

Then Evan dropped his voice to a deep whisper. "Why don't you? We can talk to each other while we... you know..."

Surprisingly I understand this hint... Probably because I can feel the idea take root in exactly the spot he wants it to...

"You can't even say the word 'masturbate' to me, but you want have phone sex," she said with a nervous giggle. "Plus, isn't your shoulder too sore for that tonight?" she asked.

"I think I can manage. I'm practically a professional at it. It's mostly wrist action." He laughed at his own joke.

Emily stammered, "I... I don't know. I've never done anything like that... I mean I have... but not with... not over the phone."

Evan confessed, "Me neither. But if you agree to be my girlfriend we'll need to get good at it."

Emily sat up in bed and took a deep breath. She struggled to think of the correct words. "Evan, about that..." she began, "I want... I don't... I..."

In this moment, sending songs to express what I feel is so much easier and I wish we lived in a musical where I can just burst into lyrics to explain myself when I need to...

"Too much too soon?" Evan asked after the silence dragged on for too long.

"Kind of..." she answered weakly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pressure you. I just thought after the song you sent me today, that you feel the way I feel," he said.

Emily wiped her hands across her lap. "I think I do... but... I don't usually do things halfway... I'm kind of an all in or nothing type of person... and I don't know if that's possible right now. Besides you still barely know me and there are things about me that you might not like."

"I know you better than I've ever known any girl. And I like everything about you so far."

Then he chuckled again and added, "Except maybe your awful t-rex face."

It eased the tension of the phone call a bit. So Emily continued to lighten the mood.

"Then I won't send you my rabbit impersonation."

"Now that I actually want to see, especially if there is tail wiggling!" His chuckle grew to a genuine laugh.

Then Emily heard him wince. "Shoulder?" she asked.

"I'm just trying to find a comfortable position," he explained.

"You should rest. Let's save the bunny for another night."

"Deal."

Then he mumbled, "I miss you."

"I miss you too," she confessed.

He sighed and said, "Good. Night Brooklyn."

"Good night Jersey."