Joy: This is so stupid.

Rainkeeper: Agreed. We're not doing this.

Seashell: We're doing this.

Joy: Who's idea was this again?

Nightflyer: Air's.

Rainkeeper: Shoulda known, shoulda known.

Air: CHINGEDY CHING!

Hosts:.........

Air: SING IT.

Nightflyer: Hee Haw. 

Seashell: Hee Haw.

Joy: It's Dominick the Donkey.

Air: CHINGEDY CHING.

Rainkeeper: Hee Haw

Nightflyer: Hee Haw.

Seashell: The Italian Christmas Donkey.

Air: OH,

Hosts: La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, La, la, la, la, la, la, laeohda

*players appear*

Rainkeeper: So it's the holiday season

Nightflyer: Happy late Hanukkah. 

Seashell: But we don't have a holiday themed dare sooooooo.....

Joy: Instead, we're all getting drunk and playing Spin the Scroll.

Seashell: Except for Joy, who has to flirt with Macaw for 15 minutes.

Air: And Kelp, who will be teaching Kinkajou how to do Cocaine

Joy: How Kelp knows how to do cocaine, I have no idea. 

Rainkeeper: Kinkajou will also have the world's supply of sugar and ten nuclear silos under her control.

Air: Oh dear moons, Gabriel's not going to be happy about this.

Kinkajou: YES! SUGAR!

Joy: I don't think it's fair that I have to give up my silos for this.

Seashell: Oh shush, and so flirt. 

*Kelp and Macaw appear*

Joy: *shudders*

Seashell: Okay, Kelp, here's some cocaine, teach Kinkajou how to use it.

Kelp:..........But......But I don't know how to use it.....

Seashell:.....That sounds like a you problem.

Kelp:........Shit.

Kinkajou: Alright, Kelp, I'm supposed to get high, so how does this white stuff work?

Kelp: Okay, well, I THINK we're supposed to eat it somehow.....

Kinkajou: Like.....mix it with water or something?

Kelp: I don't know......

Macaw: Helllloooooooo Joy!

Joy: Dude. Your son is dating my grandson.

Macaw: What?

Joy: Nothing, on with the horrible, horrible flirting... Oh dear moons, no one could flirt with with a clear mind- RAINKEEPER, GET ME A DRINK!

Rainkeeper: Daiquiri or Martini?

Joy: Whatever has more alcohol!

Rainkeeper: You got it, sis. *gives drinks to everybody until everyone is drunk*

Joy: Okay, *chugs drink* Let's do this.

Macaw: Roses are red, violets are blue,

Joy: Why did you leave me Karen, what did I do?

Macaw: Um.......

Joy: Just kidding. If you were a potato you'd be a sweet one.

Macaw: Awwwww,

Joy: That's true, because you're still a potato, a ugly ass potato, DAMMIT I CAN'T DO THIS. 

Joy: Are you the sun? Because you're so beautiful it's blinding me.

Macaw: You're adorable.

Joy: No, seriously, your teeth are yellow as the sun, it's literally blinding me.

Joy:.......I'm too good at comebacks for this dare, aren't I?

Kelp: Air, do you know how to do cocaine?

Air: No...... Is it a nose thing?

Kelp: Right! Yeah! Kinkajou! I think we have to put it up our snouts.

Kinkajou: How do we do that?

Kelp:........ Maybe if we just inhale...... *inhales cocaine*

Kelp: AAAAHHHH!!!! AAAAAH MOONS! THERE'S NO FUCKING DRUMMER BETTER THAN NEIL PEART! *smashes a glass table*

Joy:.....Kelp,did you take the cocaine??

Kelp:......Maybe.....

Joy: *sighs*

Kinkajou: *takes cocaine*

Kinkajou:......It ain't easy being cheesy.

Air: OkAAAAAAy, it's Spin the Scroll time! Gather around.

Macaw: Ooooh, can I play?

All: NO.

Joy: Are my 15 minutes up?

Seashell: Yes.

Joy: Okay good- Macaw, nobody wants to kiss you, bitch.

Umber: I'll start! *spins*

[THE WHEEL IS BACK BTW]

*scroll lands on Carnelian*

Carnelian: *sighs* Always gotta kiss the gay guy.

Umber: Shut up, you love me. *kisses her*

Carnelian: Even when you're drunk you still taste like Skittles.

Umber: It's a gift.

Carnelian: *spins*

*scroll lands on Air*

Air: Oh.....okay......

Carnelian: At this point, I honestly just don't give a shit *kisses Air*

Air: Ew. *spins*

*scrolls lands on Nightflyer*

Air: YES! *kisses him*

Nightflyer: Thank you, universe. *spins*

*scroll lands on Turtle*

Nightflyer:......WTF?

Turtle: Eh, we've done weirder things.

Nightflyer: True. *kisses him*

Joy: Ew.

Kelp: MY uncle just kissed my best friend.

Joy: DOUBLE EW.

Turtle: *spins*

*scroll lands on Kinkajou*

Kinkajou: YAY! HI OH MY MOONS WE SHOULD EAT CANDY AND GO FOR BIKE RIDES ON THE MOON!!

Turtle: No more cocaine.

Kelp: But I'm with the COCO.

Kinkajou: I BOUGHT FOR THE LOW LOW

Kelp: I'M IN LUV WITH THE COCO!

Joy: You are both high as fuck right now, aren't you?

Kelp: SKY HIGH, baby, sky high.

Kinkajou: We ain't never coming down. *kisses Turtle and spins*

*scroll lands on Qibli*

Qibli: I don't really wanna kiss high Kinkajou.

Kinkajou: TOO BAD, CACTUS TAIL! *kisses him*

Qibli: Weird. *spins*

*scroll lands on Moon*

Joy: Can I just say I love the scroll? It ships so many of my ships.

Qibli: *kisses Moon*

Moon: *spins*

*scroll lands on Joy*

Joy:.......I take back what I just said.

Moon: *sighs* Might as well, I've kissed everyone else.

Kinkajou: YEAH, YOU HAVE, YOU WH-

Kelp: KINKAJOU WHY ARE THERE NO FIREWORKS ON MARS!?!?!?!?

Kinkajou:......Oh my moons...... TURTLE WHY ARE NO FIREWORKS ON MARS?!?!?!?!

Joy: We need to stop the drug use in this game *spins*

*scroll lands on Seashell*

Joy: Mother f-

Kelp: OH MY MOONS, IT'S QUEEN SUNSHINE OF THE SCREAMYWINGS!!!! *hugs Winter*

Kinkajou:*screeches* AND KING BUTTERFLY AND PRINCESS CAPRICORN!!!! *tackles Carnelian and Qibli*

Winter: GET OFF ME, YOU PEASANT!

Kelp: I LOVE YOU QUEEN SCREAMYSUNSHINE!!!

Kinkajou: YOU'RE MINE NOW CAPRICORN!!!!

Qibli: Help!! 

Joy:.......Nah.

Kelp: KING BUTTERFLY, YOU'RE SUCH A HIDEOUS WALRUS!

Carnelian: Shut up and bow before me peasant.

Kelp: *bows*

Joy: HEY! BITCH! THE ONLY QUEEN HE BOWS BEFORE IS ME!

Carnelian: Guess not

Joy: *tackles Carnelian, starts beating her with the scroll*

Kinkajou: KING BUTTERFLY IS ENDANGERED!!! RELEASE THE SUGARY SILOS!!!!

All:......

Rainkeeper: Oh fuck.

Air: RUUUUUUUUUNNNNNN!!!!!