Rainkeeper: It's st. Patrick's Day!!! 

Nightflyer: You know what that means.

Air: Oh! Oh! Can I guess?

Nightflyer: Go for it.

Air: Cornbeef?

Nightflyer: Yep.

Air: Cabbage?

Nightflyer: Yep.

Air: Irish soda bread?

Nightflyer: Yep.

Rainkeeper: Which is really underrated, in my opinion *eats bread*

Seashell: It's not underrated- it's disgusting.

Rainkeeper: I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW THAT IRISH SODA BREAD IS MY FAVORITE KIND OF BREAD IN THE WORLD.

Seashell: Well, duh. It has raisins in it, and you're Raisinkeeper. 

Rainkeeper:....*eats bread*

Air: A bunch of cancelled parades?

Nightflyer: Yep.

Air: A bucket of Irish stereotypes?

Nightflyer: Yep.

Air: Lots of drunks people?

Nightflyer: Yep.

Air: Bread pudding?

Nightflyer: Definitely Yep.

Joy: *currently shoveling bread pudding into her mouth like Clay does with cows* Whut?

Seashell: You do know that there's literal POUNDS of butter and sugar in that, right?

Joy:.... *leaves*

Joy: *goes, gets a masters degree in philosophy*

Joy: *returns*

Joy: Walk with me, Seashell. There is much to learn. 

Joy: *takes her to a huge library*

Joy: *takes a random book off the shelf and flips to a random page*

Joy: Ah, yes. I'd like to quote to you the mighty words of the great philosopher B. Arnya Rd. Do you mind?

Seashell: Well, if it's from a famous philosopher, I guess not. 

Joy: Doth quote the snotty boy- "I do. What I want. When, I want to do it. Ne ne ne, nenene neh."

Seashell:........What?

Joy: "I do. What I want. When I want to do it. Ne ne ne, nenene, neh."

Seashell:.......I hate you.

Joy: I don't know what you're talking about, this is a great work of literature. Even the King of Hell has made reference to it, isn't that right, Air?

Air: YUP!

*players appear*

Winter: NO.

Joy: YES.

Winter: I distinctly remember. You tortured me last week.

Winter: THERE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A THREE DARE BREAK, REMEMBER???

Nightflyer: Yeah, but we don't care about the rules.

Winter: YOU MADE THAT RULE!

Joy: Rules were made to be broken.

Turtle: That's ridiculous. Nothing's made to be broken.

Carnelian: Pinatas.

Amber: Glowsticks.

Kelp: Karate boards.

Qibli: Spaghetti when you have a small pot. 

Joy: Bones.

Turtle: *sighs*

Turtle: Let's just get this over with.

Air: Well we gotta do one thing first. 

Kinkajou: oooooo, what?

Rainkeeper: *pulls cord hanging from the ceiling, bar falls out from the side of the wall, fully stocked in alcohol*

Rainkeeper: ALCOHOL! *clings glass with a tiny spoon*

Carnelian: Oh three moons, they still haven't sent you to AA meetings yet?

Rainkeeper: AA IS FOR QUITTERS.

Joy: It's st. paddy's day, so yes, of course we saved the dare that Winter has to be drunk for for today.

Kelp: I hate it when the English language forces you to repeat the same word twice, and it's still correct.

Seashell: That that. Had had. For for. 

Nightflyer: That that is is. That that is not is not. That that is is not that that is not, is it?

All:........

Rainkeeper: I need to be drunker to figure that shit out. *starts pouring shots*

Kinkajou: Wait why do we all have to get drunk if Winter's the only one doing the dare?

Hosts: *shrugs*

Joy: It's more entertaining.

*two hours of drinking later*

Amber: Y'know *hiccups* you never realize how shitty girls have it until you are one.

Carnelian: Y' never realize how good Queens have it til you are one.

Amber: I used to be a queen....

Carnelian: You still are.

Amber: *gasps* YOU'RE SO RIGHT OMM

Amber: GONNA MAKE ME CROWN OUT OF BEER BOTTLES.

Turtle: *faceplants against the table*

Turtle: Everyone hates me.

Kinkajou: I DONT!

Turtle: That's the animus magic talking*

Kinkajou: I HAS YOU KNOW THAT I DONT FOLLOW THOSE MAGIC RULES

Turtle: *sighs*

Kinkajou: I DONT FOLLOW NOBODY'S RULES. 

Kinkajou:.....YEAH. I DON'T. IMMA GO KILL A COCONUT.

Moon: I wonder what would happen if I told Qibli and Winter I was ace...

Rainkeeper: Easy. They'd screw each other.

Seashell: RAINKEEPER!

Rainkeeper: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?

Seashell: FAMILY FRIENDLY, REMEMBER!?!??!

Joy: Honey, we ain't family friendly.

Kelp: *pops the cork off a bottle of champagne*

*Champagne cork flies across the room and hits Carnelian in the face*

Carnelian: *yelps and falls to the floor*

Kelp: *bursts out laughing*

Kelp:  I- I- AAAHAHAAHHAHAH- I'M SORRY! *Keeps laughing*

Joy: You. I chose well with you.

Air: AND THEN THEY WERE PLAYING CONNECT FOUR-

Nightflyer: *drinking heavily* Uh huh.

Air: AND JACK WON, AND I JUST *hiccups and starts crying*

Air: I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT THEM 

Nightflyer: I know. *pours another drink*

Air: I JUST- *whimpering noises*

Nightflyer: *drinks* I know.

Rainkeeper: So! Winter. Are you drunk yet?

Winter: FUCK YOU.

Rainkeeper:.......Gonna take that as a yes.

Joy: So fess up buddy. Who do you love more- Moon or Qibli?

Winter:.......

Winter: I DON'T KNOW! *bursts into tears*

Winter: THEY BOTH HATE ME AND ARE DATING EACH OTHER- WHAT'S THE POINT?!!?

Kelp: The point is that you love them!

Joy: and maybe one a little more so than the other....?

Winter: I mean- *wipes at tears angrily*

Winter: I think I only fell for Moon cause she was a Nightwing and I wanted to be rebellious or something and I KNEW the tribe would hate us together. But then I actually started TALKING to her and she was so sweet and I just ARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH

Rainkeeper: There's a reason why they call them crushes, buddy.

Air: BUDDY!!! *starts crying*

Nightflyer: *pours another drink*

Winter: But then I started talking with Qibli too! And he KEPT TALKING TO ME, NO MATTER WHAT I DID, AND NOBODY EVER DID THAT, AND I'M AN ASSHOLE TO HIM-

Qibli: No shit, Sherlock.

Winter: FUCK YOU WATSON.

Winter:......SEE WHAT I MEAN?!!??!

Winter: And- And he's just so confident and IRRITATINGLY smart- and his family sucks too, but he found a way out of it and so I have to admire him for that, don't I?

Qibli: You.....You admire me because my mother sold me?

Winter: I admire you because you DIDN'T GO BACK. I go crawling back to my parents, begging for approval at every turn! You never did!

Qibli: Well....

Winter: FUCK IT, YOU STUPID HOSTS ARE RIGHT. I LIKE QIBLI MORE. 

Joy: I knew it.

Kelp: *quietly slides her money*

Seashell: Damn. *hands money over to Rainkeeper*

Rainkeeper: Ah, alcohol. The solution to, and cause of, all life's problems.

Joy: *looks around*

Air: *rambling about Destiel and domestic Team Free Will 2.0*

Nightflyer: *nodding and pouring more drinks*

Moon: *stacking shot glasses*

Turtle: *passed out drunk*

Kinkajou: *drawing on his face*

Qibli: *making out with Winter*

Amber/Carnelian: *playing pool*

Carnelian: *sharpening the pool cue*

Amber:......Carnie, I don't think that's how you play....

Carnelian: Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 

Rainkeeper: Please don't pole vault into the bar again.

Seashell: *left, completely done with everyone*

Kelp: *balancing a bottle on his head and humming Irish music*

Joy: Happy st. Patty's day everyone.