hey yallllllll I'm back! hope y'all enjoy this chapter, or at least try to haha (:

There's a few paragraphs in italics! Those are flashbacks!

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Lost and afraid, young and innocent, but getting older

I don't want to be alone

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"Mi luna!"

  The sound of Mateo's happy laughter followed by Adriana's soft chuckling brought a smile to Harry's lips. It was the following morning where Harry had decided to take the morning and afternoon off from work to spend time with Adriana and Mateo. He suggested spending the beautiful day at his swimming pool to brighten the mood of both Mateo and Adriana. Adriana and Harry decided that they will have a talk again about her addiction the morning after, but Harry told her they could do it at night and instead enjoy the morning. He just felt like he needed to cheer her up after the rough night they had.

   "Fuck she's so tight."

  Harry snapped his head to the left to glare at Niall who had his eyes trained on Adriana as she climbed out of the swimming pool. Her slim body was clad in a dusty pink bikini.

   "Niall," Harry continued to glare, making Niall remove his gaze from Adriana and smirk at Harry. "Don't."

   "Sorry, peach. I'm just wondering how she's managed to maintain a body like that while being a coke addict," Niall said bluntly.

   "I don't know either, but I can see she's losing weight," Harry said with a little sigh, noticing Adriana's spine sticking out a little as she bent down to take Mateo into her arms.

   "Has there been any progress in getting her to stop?" Niall questioned, adjusting his Ray-Bans on the bridge of his nose.

   "I tried getting her to reduce her intake to one line a day. But sometimes she'd go and do more without telling me. She did that yesterday," Harry mumbled sadly, making Niall pout.

   "Don't be too upset if it happens often, Harry," Niall advised. "You can't expect her to quit or reduce that quickly. It's-"

   "Hard, I know," Harry murmured. "I'm just...scared. Scared and worried. She told me she does it to forget what happened to her in the past."

   "What happened to her?" Niall questioned with a frown.

   "I don't know. She hasn't told me that. I asked her about it yesterday and she got all anxious and afraid. It's too painful for her to talk about it now," Harry explained, making Niall pout sympathetically.

   "It's that bad?"

   "Seems so," Harry sighed a little.

   "I think it'd be helpful if you knew what happened," Niall said thoughtfully. "Because maybe she needs like to confide in someone, and then you can help her move on from whatever happened in the past properly and focus on stopping her addiction."

   "Yeah, but how do I get her to tell me?" Harry frowned a little. "It's going to take some time."

   "Well be patient first of all," Niall advised. "But after some time, when you have another argument about I dunno the addiction, bring it up. Say that you don't know what happened to her so how can you help her? I guess that could help."

  Niall gave Harry a little more advise and he listened attentively, before they both decided to go into the pool again. Mateo floating around with his arm floats on and tiny hands waving about was probably the cutest thing Harry has ever seen. He was happy to see that him and his mother were alright after the little incident they had last night. Mateo was a very loving and forgiving kid, and Adriana was happy that he was somewhat able to understand that she was just having a bad time. For three years old, he was a smart and perceptive kid.

   "Harry!" Mateo called out when he saw Harry slipping under the water and coming up, running his hands through his long locks.

  Adriana couldn't help but feel her stomach churn at the sight of her boyfriend standing there in the water, dark hair slicked back, water droplets rolling down on his defined torso, dark tattoos standing out and glistening. A smile stretched across his heart-shaped lips and he swam towards Mateo and Adriana. He held Mateo's tiny hands and moved him around, grinning and speaking in a high-pitched voice.

   "Hi baby!"

   "Hola, mi sol!" Mateo exclaimed with a giggle, holding Harry's fingers and smiling. Harry felt his heart explode in his chest at the little boy's words.

  Harry played with Mateo for a bit as Adriana excused herself to go to the bathroom. She dried herself with a towel and slipped on a cover up dress and walked back into the house. After she had used the bathroom, she started walking back to the swimming pool but somehow got lost. Harry's mansion was pretty big and easy to get lost in as it had a lot of random hallways and rooms in it. As Adriana walked around with a frown on her face, she passed by a room. The door was open and she could see the lights were dim-lit shining onto something golden. Her curiosity got the best of her and she entered it, only to find out that it was a huge trophy room.

  Harry felt her lips part in awe as she walked in and gazed around. It was a fairly small room, but beautifully set up with glass cabinets on the sides and a writing desk at the back. She could tell they were sectioned off according to the different hobbies did. There was one side for horse riding, which Harry did more of when he was a child. There were certificates for music, talent shows and excellency in the Arts. She came across the side were all the trophies and certificates were from his time in high school.

  Adriana smiled at the sight of Harry's high school graduation picture in the cabinet, surrounded by academic awards and certificates. The emblem of the high school he went to caught Adriana's eyes. She leaned closer to stare at the printed emblem on the corner of one of the certificates and felt her brows slope downwards.

   "Adriana?"

  She pulled back quickly when she heard Harry speak up loudly from the hallway outside the room, before she saw him quickly appear by the doorway. He sighed in relief when he found her, thinking that she had gotten lost in the house. He made his way towards her, finding her gazing at his high school certificates with wonderment.

   "You went to Lake High Highschool in Houston, Texas?" Adriana gaped a little at him, making him frown and nod in response. "When the fuck were you in Texas?"

   "I was there briefly for two years. Grade 11 and 12," he told her. "Sorry, I forgot to tell you but yeah. I moved around a lot in America, and I stayed in Houston only for two years and graduated. Then I moved to New York and went to Julliard and I've been here ever since then."

   "Harry, I went to Lake High," Adriana told him, making his jaw slacken and eyebrows shoot up.

   "What? No way."

   "Way," she nodded in response, before looking at the graduation picture and frowning again. "But I think I graduated a year before you did."

   "So I was a junior while you were a senior," Harry said, making her nod in response. "What the fuck? This is wild, I don't remember seeing you around."

   "I don't remember seeing you around," Adriana chuckled in response. "Do you have any of the yearbooks?"

  Harry nodded in response, bending down by the cabinet where there were drawers he could pull out right under the glass bit. Inside where all his yearbooks neatly packed away, he pulled out a burgundy colored one with the school emblem on it and stood up again. This was his junior year yearbook. He flicked through the pages to look for himself first to show her what he looked like during the time, landing on the page of his homeroom class and pointing his picture out for her to see.

   "Look it's me," Harry said sheepishly, while she bit her lower lip to stifle a laugh.

   "Oh Harry, you're so adorable," she murmured with a smile. "You used to wear glasses?"

   "Yeah but I got laser eye surgery done after I left," he said. "Are you sure you don't remember me?"

   "No, I mostly kept to myself while I was in school," she said with a sigh. "I didn't know anyone from the years below me."

   "I think I remember you," Harry murmured quietly when he flicked through the pages again to look for Adriana. "Oh wow, you look pretty young, baby, and something else but I can't put my finger on it."

   "I looked normal, Harry, healthy."

   "Your eyes, they look the same," Harry said, making Adriana frown at him in a dumbfounded way.

   "Well, I don't think your eyes change over time-"

   "No, I mean, they look like they have the same amount of pain in them as they do now," Harry explained himself hesitantly, making Adriana's blood run cold a little. "Right?"

   "It should look like there's more pain then than now," Adriana murmured quietly, swallowing thickly.

   "Adriana, I think we ran into each other at some point in school," Harry muttered a little. "The more I look at this picture the more I remember."

   "How on earth-"

   "I was late for music," he suddenly remembered, while Adriana felt herself growing anxious. "I was running and I ran into you. Like fully ran straight into you, and it was like one of those I dunno know 'you dropped your shit I dropped my shit, our eyes met' kind of moment."

   "I think I remember too," she whispered when she looked at his graduation picture. She remembered the quiet boy with big glasses who had asked her if she was okay when he spotted the bruise on her face.

   "There's something I said to you, it's probably I'm sorry or something but something else," Harry frowned deeply, looking at the picture of Adriana again before looking at Adriana herself. "There was something on your face."

   "A bruise," she answered for him with a sigh, making his eyes widen a little.

   "A bruise," he repeated. "Yes. It was big, on your eye, spreading towards your cheek."

   "Thank you."

  Harry's words came out quick and soft when Adriana picked his guitar case up and handed it to him. His curious green eyes couldn't help but linger around the hideous, purple-black bruise that Adriana had on her face.

  The dark purple color of it ran along the crease of her eye, dragging down under her lower lash line; all very poorly covered up by foundation. There was another bruise around her cheek as well; less severe that the one around her eye but the redness and purple hues of it still peeked out under the heavy caked on foundation and bronzer.

  Adriana felt his burning gaze on her face, pulling her head down so her hair fell over her face. She gathered her things quickly, feeling her heart racing anxiously when he cleared his throat to speak.

   "Are-Are you okay?" he couldn't help but ask her, the sight of the bruise worrying him as he gazed at her with slight sympathy. She looked at him. The boy she didn't know the name of.

   "I'm fine."

   "I think I heard people talking about you," Harry murmured a little, now worried he brought up something bad because Adriana had looked away with a distant look in her eyes, reminiscing. "But I-I think you were called something else."

   "Addie," she said with a grimace. "Fucking hated that name, but they called me that."

   "Yeah," Harry breathed, feeling it all rushing back to him. "I didn't know your surname. But I heard people talking about a senior girl named Addie, and how she had an abusive father- oh fuck."

  Harry felt his heart fall in his chest when Adriana looked at him, the expression on her face filled with emotions, hard to describe. Adriana figured that she could try to tell Harry about her childhood for now, a part of her past. He didn't know what happened to her parents, she never mentioned them as much to him. Harry, on the other hand didn't know what to say. He didn't know if he should press on and ask her if it was true that her father was abusive, or if he should give her time.

   "My father was abusive," she said to him suddenly with a sigh. "What you said about my eyes looking the same as they do now, and what I said about the pain during that time should be more in my eyes than now."

   "Yeah?" Harry murmured, stepping forwards to hold her hand. "The pain was more back then?"

   "Yeah definitely more," she nodded. "My father was a monster," she whispered quietly, looking down at their joined hands as she spoke. "He was an alcoholic, and he'd always abuse me, ever since I was young, like 3."

   "Fuck, that's like Mateo's age," Harry murmured with wide eyes. For a moment, he imagined a small, scared Hispanic girl getting beaten by a drunk, father. The thought made him tear up for a second.

  Adriana on the other hand was having sudden flashbacks to when she was just a young girl and her father would beat her every time she pissed him off. She could see images of one incident flash before her eyes when Adriana was five and her sister was seven.

   "Adriana! Viens ici!" Adriana! Come here!

  Little Adriana shivered at the sound of her father's gruff voice calling for her roughly. She curled up tightly into a ball, clutching her Simba soft toy firmly to her chest as she hid in the closet. She heard footsteps approaching, before the closet door was shoved upon, revealing her older sister, Adrielle.

   "Ils vous appellee," she told her urgently. He is calling you.

   "I don't wanna go," Adriana whimpered in fright, shaking her head vigorously.

   "Adriana," her sister huffed impatiently. "Don't make him mad. Go!"

  Adriana didn't budge from her curled up, fetal position, shaking a little because of how scared she was. Adrielle didn't want to risk their father losing his temper again, and reached out to grab Adriana's arm. Adriana let out a quiet whimper, tears already falling from her dark eyes as she was forcefully pulled out of the closet.

   "Just do what he says, then he won't get mad," Adrielle whispered ot her sister, wrenching the soft toy out of her arms and tossing it onto the bed.

   "Adriana! Où es-tu?" her father called for her again, making Adriana's heart pound wildly in her chest.

   "Adrielle, he'll hit me again, I don't wanna," she cried softly.

   "He'll hit us both if you don't go," Adrielle hissed quietly, pushing her out of the bedroom. "Now go!"

  Adriana didn't want her sister getting hurt as well, even though she knew well enough that her father never hurt Adrielle. It was always Adriana. The small girl padded softly towards the living room where her half-drunk father was sitting on the sofa watching the TV. His dark, menacing eyes snapped towards the young girl standing at the opening of the living room, shaking with fright.

   "Get me a beer," he ordered her, and she nodded quickly in response.

  She hurried to the tiny, cramped-up kitchen and swung the fridge open, barely filled with anything but I few jars and beer bottles. Adriana opened the beer bottle with an opener, knowing that it would please her father to receive one that was already open, and hurried back to the living room. But as she moved quickly, her foot got caught in the edge of the carpet that was laid in front of her father, causing her to trip and fall. The bottle slipped from her hands and dropped to the floor with a thud, the yellow liquid seeping out and splashing onto her father's shoes and the carpet.

   "Merde!" his father yelled loudly, standing up as Adriana quickly scampered back in fear. "You fucking idiot!"

   "D-Désolé, Papa," she tried to apologize but when his gaze locked with hers, she felt her entire body freeze with fear.

  His father wouldn't hear it. Adriana turned on her knees and tried to get up and run away, but he quickly had his fingers tangled with her hair, gripping it tightly and pulling her head back sharply. She let out a sudden scream of pain, struggling against him, but he quickly turned her around and delivered a sharp, harsh slap to her cheek.

   "Stop screaming, fuck," he cursed loudly, letting go of her hair and gripping the front of her t-shirt instead. "How many times have I told you to be careful with my fucking beer?"

   "I'm sorry, Papa," Adriana cried loudly, tiny hands gripping his wrist as she twisted and turned. He gripped her cheek, forcing her to look at him.

   "No point in saying sorry, Adriana. You do it all the fucking time," he tightened his grip on her face.

  Adriana felt like she couldn't breathe. Her dark brown eyes were tightly screwed shut with tears streaming down her red, bruised cheeks as her ears were filled up with the rough, harsh words of her father. She kept her eyes shut and prayed that it would all end soon, that her father will be merciful and not use his belt on her like he usually would. Fortunately, he didn't use his belt, and instead gave her two more slaps to her cheeks before throwing her onto the ground as if she were just some rag doll.

   "Adrielle, take your sister to her room," her father called out gruffly.

  Adriana lay on the floor limply; dark eyes dead, mind numb. Her cheek was bleeding on the inside and she could taste the blood soaking her tongue. She felt her small body being dragged away by her sister, slinging her arm around Adriana's waist and heaving her against her body. Adrielle managed to get Adriana on the bed, and quickly brought her Simba toy to her for comfort. Adriana's dead eyes rolled to the side to look at Adrielle who was also crying, but her words were not of comfort, but hate.

   "If you didn't kill Maman, he never would have turned into a monster," Adrielle cried bitterly, while Adriana sniffled and shook her head.

   "I-I didn't kill Maman," she whispered desperately, holding her Simba toy.

   "You did," Adrielle insisted with a hiss, standing up and turning to leave the room.

   "Adrielle, wait," Adriana called for her sister in pain. "It hurts, help me."

  Her sister paid no attention to her, and left the room to go to hers. Adriana lay there on the bed with bruises on her face with her Simba toy in her arms. It felt familiar, the whole situation. She felt alone as well, with no one to neither comfort her nor love her. She sniffled when she had that thought, hugging her Simba plush toy firmly to her chest before pulling it back and gazing at it. The big yellow eyes of the soft toy stared back at her lifelessly while she stroked the soft material of it and smiled sadly.

   "It's just you and me, Simba."

   "Adriana?"

  Harry's voice brought her back to life, her teary eyes finding his concerned green ones as the surroundings of her old home faded away. She let out a heavy breath, hand holding onto Harry's tightly as she tried not to cry. But she couldn't help it when the tears came flowing hard.

  She asked herself why she was crying but she didn't have one specific answer. Maybe it was because she was almost as young as Mateo when that incident happened, and she couldn't imagine it happening to Mateo. Or perhaps it was because she couldn't get over how much pain and violence she had endured during her childhood, leading up to her adulthood. Or it could be because she was relieved she was out of such a toxic environment, but now suffering from a completely different problem.

   "Oh my sweet, sweet, darling," Harry murmured quietly as he held her firmly to his body, hugging her tightly. "He's gone now, baby. He's gone."

   "I-I just can't believe-b-" she cried softly, wrapping her arms around his neck. "What human would hurt a child like-like that, Harry? He-He used to slap me, and-and beat me, and whip me with his belt- oh god the belt."

   "Shh don't think about that, my love," Harry whispered in pain, his sad green eyes filling up with tears. "God, don't speak it's okay."

   "My sister blamed me for her death," Adriana whispered sorrowfully, making Harry frown deeply, pulling back to look at her.

   "Who's death?" he murmured, stroking the side of her face.

   "My mother's," Adriana sniffled quietly. "She died while giving birth to me. My father was sober at the time, but lost it when she died and blamed it on me. He gave up like five years of sobriety." 

   "Oh baby, it wasn't your fault," Harry whispered softly with an expression of pity.

   "My father and sister thought otherwise," she mumble with a pained expression. "The amount of times I called out to my sister for help," Adriana stopped shortly to shake her head, tearing up again. "She never helped me. She was never abused. It was always me. I-I was always alone, always so hurt and alone and full of pain and nobody wanted to help me."

   "You're not alone anymore, Adriana," Harry spoke firmly, shaking his head and holding her face in his hands. "You have me, my love. You have me, and Mateo. You have two boys who love you so so much and will be here for you till the end of time."

   "Look at me, darling," Harry murmured to her, urging her gaze to meet his. "I love you more than anything, Adriana, and I know this pain seems like it's never-ending. But it will end, I promise you. You deserve all the happiness in this world, and I promise you there is no one who will work harder than me to give you that."

   "Harry," she cried softly, overwhelmed by hearing his words. "Fuck I love you."

  Their lips met in a firm, close-mouthed kiss. When they pulled away for air, Harry hugged Adriana firmly. Adriana rested her cheek against his, and her chin on his shoulder, blinking away the rest of her tears and sighing heavily. As Harry continued to whisper soft and comforting words to her, Adriana wondered to herself that if she will truly be able to find happiness with Harry. She wondered if she will ever be able to overcome her addiction, and that Harry will be by her side throughout it all. After all that had happened to her, she still wasn't sure. She wanted to believe Harry, but every time she got a taste of happiness it always diminishes.

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  Adriana and Mateo stayed over that afternoon to sleep over at Harry's mansion. He figured if he could keep her away from her place and fully occupied with her son and Harry himself. A part of him wished that the morning had taken such a dark turn when Adriana revealed some of her past to him, but he was also grateful because now he knew what it was that was haunting Adriana.

  He assumed that her father and her past of abuse was what haunted Adriana and made her turn to drugs, but he had a feeling there was more to her past than Adriana had told him. There was more about what her father did, which she hasn't told him. But he didn't go and push her about it.

   "I'll be back in a few," Harry promised her as they stood by the doorway.

   "Wish you didn't have to cut it," Adriana pouted a little, running her fingers through his long, chocolate locks.

   "This is the only thing my sister asked from me for her birthday," Harry grumbled. "Whatever, I could do with a cut."

   "Why don't you donate your hair?" Adriana suggested.

   "Already thought about that, but I dyed my hair blonde a year ago for a few months. I don't think they accept hair that's been dyed," Harry told her, making her eyes widen a little.

   "Harry with blonde hair. This I have to see," Adriana muttered with a smirk, making him chuckle lightly.

   "It was a stupid bet I made with Niall. I lost so I had to dye my hair his hair color," Harry explained, before looking at his watch again and frowning. "I'll be off then. It'll get late soon so I might as well get going."

   "Alright baby," Adriana nodded in response. She cupped his cheeks firmly and reached up to press a firm kiss to his lips. "Can't wait to see your new hair."

  Harry kissed her back firmly, and bid her goodbye before walking out of the mansion. He decided to walk to his usual hair salon, which was only fifteen minutes away. When he was there, he got the guy to cut all his lengthy locks and style it back to the way it used to be when he was around 19. He spent a little time at the hair salon, chatting with the coiffeur whom he happened to know for quite a long time. They talked as hours passed by, and eventually they went to a bar together and had a drink. Harry texted Adriana to let her know that he was going to be out with his friend for some time and she messaged him back telling him to have fun.

  Harry only had a glass of gin and tonic and by the time it was nearing midnight he bid his friend goodbye and decided to head home walking. It was quiet and strangely empty when he walked back to his mansion. The streets were lonely and ghostly, but Harry simply inhaled deeply and walked faster. After a few minutes of walking, his ears detected footsteps, and he quickly spun around to see if there was anyone else there. But there was no one.

   "Why did I decide to walk again?" Harry asked himself quietly, digging his hands into his pockets and continued to walk, still looking back.

  When he turned back again, he walked straight into a stranger. He looked at the man and squinted, parting his lips to apologize. But suddenly, pairs of hands grabbed him from the back, one clamping down on his mouth and two other pairs pulling him into an empty alleyway. Harry's wide, frightened eyes stayed locked on the dark figure who was in front of him, and was now following him and the other men who grabbed him into the alleyway.

   "Hey! Let me go!" Harry called out loudly, struggling wildly against the men but it was three against one, so Harry was helpless.

  His back was slammed against the stone wall, causing his breath to knock out of his lungs, a groan escaping his lips. He looked up slowly at the figure who had now come closer, standing in front of Harry as two other men held him back against the wall. Harry squinted and studied the man, pale and with dark, almond eyes, sharp cheekbones and a beard. His appearance was rugged, and he looked dangerous in Harry's eyes. Harry frowned deeply in worry, wondering what sort of business he had with these men.

   "I-If there's anything you want I can give you money," Harry told him, trying not to stutter. "There's no need for violence."

   "That's funny," Donnie chuckled deeply, tucking his hands into his jeans. His laugh was somber, and sad, which confused Harry. "That's exactly what we want."

  Donnie didn't say anymore. He simply stepped back, and allowed the third man to step in his place. Harry was caught completely off-guard when the man swung his clenched fist at him, colliding with his jaw powerfully and knocking the breath out of his lungs. Harry gasped when he felt pain flood the area, vision blurring and cheek stinging at the powerful punch. He wasn't given any more time to recover before his head was yanked up again, another fist colliding with the same side, this time causing blood to spill from his lips.

   "Stop," Harry croaked weakly, crying out loud when the men let go of Harry and he slumped against the wall. "M-Money."

   "Avoid the face," Donnie uttered, making the men grunt in reply and continue to beat Harry up.

  Harry tried to push himself up, stumbling a little and bringing his fists up. He tried to swing one at the man in front of him, but he ducked easily and retaliated with a kick to Harry's abdomen. Harry went flying back against the wall again with a heavy grunt, guts smashing together as a result of the kick, hand clutching his stomach in pain. Harry wasn't a fighter, therefore when the three men shoved him to the floor again and began kicking him, Harry let his body go numb, his arms and legs were weak, and there was pain everywhere. Bruised and winded, Harry's cheek pressed against the dirty ground as he shut his eyes and curled his body into a fetal position, praying for it the end.

  Then all of a sudden it did end. The kicking stopped. Harry's abdomen was throbbing continuously. The inside of his cheek was bleeding rapidly and his tongue was soaked with his blood. He could feel a streak of blood dragging down the side of his forehead from a cut in his eyebrow, from where the man had punched his eye. His eyes cracked open to peer at his surroundings, a groan escaping his lips when one of them suddenly drove his foot into Harry's stomach one last time, kicking him so that he laid on his back.

  Harry gazed up at the four men who stared back down at him, green eyes squinted, one of them almost swollen shut. He turned his head to the side a little, allowing the blood from his mouth drip out so that he wouldn't choke on it accidentally. Donnie knelt down beside Harry, heart tightening with a bit of guilt as he gazed at the bruised, innocent man. He never wanted to do this to Harry, but he had to. He knew Adriana would never forgive him now, and he was going to have to live with that. Donnie grasped Harry's short hair and pulled his head up to face him, a hard, indescribable expression etched on his face.

   "Tell her I warned her. I warned her and it's time to pay up."

  And just like that Donnie and his men left, abandoning Harry who was injured and in pain, unsure of what had just happened.

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∙ Yikesssss so a lot happened! What are your thoughts on this chapter!

∙ What do you think about Adriana's past and her abusive father?

∙ Also, my heart and prayers are with those suffering from Hurricane Harvey in Texas ❤️

∙ There's a lot more sad shizzzzz so stay tuned and don't give up :) x

thiora ❤️