Finn woke up with a jolt. Green and grey images chasing him into consciousness.

Shuffling towards the bathroom he tried to shake the memories the dream elicited. Emily in her green dress. Grey eyes boring into him. The red veil that descended when she left with Max.

Spite had reared its ugly head. Finn decided if she could leave with another man, then he was going to move on as well.

It had been a mistake.

As if they were faced with a ticking time bomb, the brunette clinging to him on the dance floor had dragged him into a cab. In the backseat purple painted nails tugged at his jeans, pink stained lips sucked at his skin. In the past, Finn could easily give in to the desires of this woman. Meaningless sex satisfying an immediate need for the numbness to descend.

This time it was different. This time it was all wrong. She was the wrong woman. Numbness no longer held the same appeal. He wanted to feel something. Like he had in the hospital room for a few brief moments. The warmth. The tenderness. The desire. He wanted Emily. Despite the offered easy lay, Finn walked the brunette to her door making sure she got home safely but refused to come in.

Back at base, he had paced the common room, drinking beer and flicking bottle tops across the room in anger. Tension coiled in every muscle. Trying not to imagine where Emily was, what she was doing, who she was doing it with. It was a losing battle.

Eventually, he sought refuge in his room, knowing sleep would elude him, but hoping beating on his pillow might help. Or crying into it. He must have drifted off, launching into a strange dream where Emily twirled before him, trying to tell him something. A thick wall of glass separated them, blocking out any sound. Finn woke up with a heavy heart and a massive erection, visions of a green dress the cause of the latter.

Letting the water pulse over his strained muscles, Finn dealt with his morning present in the shower, a strangled groan emitting from him as he ejaculated to the memory of Emily's smile. Leaning against the shower wall to catch his breath, Finn tried to find the calm he needed to meet the day.

He had to get away from Emily. It was the only solution. It had worked before. It would work again. Determination set it. Speaking to his CO to get in the next rotation out of the country was today's priority. He did not care where it was going. The worse, the better.

Trying not to think of Max, his usual dining companion, Finn quickly ate breakfast before heading to the administration building. He filled out the required paperwork requesting active duty and submitted the forms. After giving his testimony the day after tomorrow he would be free to leave. 

Mentally groaning, Finn did not know how he was going to be able to face Emily at the tribunal. Maybe he could speak to Lance, ask him to find a reason for Emily not to be there. Shaking his head, he knew It was futile. No one knew the case like Emily. He was going to have to see her. One last time.

Then there was Max. How could he avoid him? He was a member of the team. A valuable member. His friend. How could he face him? Be happy for him? The thought caused the red veil to blur his vision again. He hated how he was being petty.

Heading for the gym, Finn decided to beat something up for a few hours.

After another shower, this time to ease his aching muscles, Finn locked himself in his room. Campbell had texted, asking him to join them for a barbeque, but Finn had declined the invitation. His buddy may be used to his foul moods, but there was no need to subject his wife and kids to the maelstrom. Besides, Finn doubted he could stand the front row seat to the happy couple show Campbell and Lily presented.

Waiting until well into the dinner hour, Finn headed to the mess hall to grab some grub. Hoping Max had eaten without him.

It was not Finn's day. Moments after he sat down in the nearly vacant dining area, a plateful of pasta before him, Max walked in. The other man loaded up his tray and plopped down across from Finn.

"Hey."

Grunting in acknowledgement, Finn purposely did not look up, focusing rather on shovelling another mouthful of food onto his fork. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Max's hands buttering a roll. Finn imagined those hands touching Emily. That lead to thoughts of her kissing him, moaning his name. Shifting in his seat, Finn picked up the pace. He needed to eat fast and find an excuse to leave.

They ate in silence for a few more moments, the sound of Max chewing grating on Finn's nerves. Then Max spoke.

"Saw you and that girl last night," his voice giddy. "So... how was she?"

Finn shrugged his shoulders. Maybe if he appeared uninterested Max would drop the subject. But Max was not going to give up. It was their routine after Finn had gone home with a woman. The next day Max wanted details – he liked to brag to the other guys about Finn's escapades. In the past he hadn't minded the tall tales Max would spin, Finn, portrayed as the hero who gets the girl. Of course what Max and the boys did not understand was it was all senseless, a way to cope, nothing to be proud of.

"C'mon man. I need details. Don't leave me hanging."

"Nothing to tell," Finn mumbled between bites.

"Get out. She wasn't any good?" Finn could hear the disbelief in Max's voice. "She sure looked fine."

A part of Finn's brain knew Max was only paying him a compliment, but Finn wanted to hit the man. He had Emily Montgomery, why would he even look at another woman. He swallowed his food and prepared to shove another mouthful in.

And then before he could stop himself the words slipped out. "What about you?"

"Man, your friend Emily..." Max's words drifted off. The dull ache in his chest flared up. Finn hated himself but he wanted to know more. Max did not disappoint, continuing, "She's something else."

"I know I ..." He had to bite down on his tongue to stop from admitting he loved her. Or at least the image of her. What Emily had been. "I know ... any man lucky enough to capture her heart would be set for life."

Max popped the lid on a can of soda, the carbonation escaping in a burst sounding like a huge sigh or a missile escaping from an RPG. Finn could not help warning the other man. "So treat her well." Or I'll have to break your legs went unsaid.

Max huffed. "Do you think I could get her to go out with me?"

"After last night I should think you'd have no problem," Finn growled into his plate. The ache jabbed at his ribs and he resisted the urge to rub his chest.

"Last night?"

"I saw you leave with her..." Finn did not want to finish the thought. He had spent too much of last night filling in those blanks.

"You think...Oh man!" Max was shaking his head. "I wish."

The fork filled with noodles froze in Finn's hand. "What?"

"I only walked her out and made sure she safely got into a cab."

"But..." Finn had assumed. He did not know where to go with the sentence. Then he thought about her smile. "Em looked like she was having a good time."

"I thought so. She seemed really interested in my stories about the army. Asked a lot about you."

Finn's mind took off, running through the ramifications of what Max was saying. If Emily was asking about him, smiling his smile, then there might be some feeling still left. Sure, it could have been nostalgia. But no, not that smile. He knew it too well.

Max was droning on about some story he told Emily.

"And then you pulled that brunette and proved my point."

Finn felt a lump of lead drop in his stomach. He had been so stupid. Emily was right there, waiting for him to return to their table and instead of taking the opportunity, he had been...jealous...for no reason. And anger had made him put his arm around that girl. And kiss her. In front of Emily.

He mentally cursed his temper.

"That's when she got sick."

For the first time, Finn looked directly at Max. The ache in his chest spiked. "Sick?"

"She said it was just a headache, but she went all pale." Max rambled on. "I wanted to escort her home, thought she might pass out or something. But she insisted she would be fine."

The pasta in his stomach gurgled and threatened to return the way it had come. He had been a complete idiot. Not only had Emily met him with nothing but kindness since they had reunited, she had gone out of her way for him. Yet he still doubted her. She found ways to be near him. Yet he still doubted her. She had initiated the kiss. Yet he still doubted her.

Once, long ago Emily had asked him to never doubt her feelings. Since returning it was all he had done. Doubt everything.

Emily had watched him kiss another woman and then been upset. 

Emily had feelings for him. 

As the thought seeded itself in his heart, his brain recognized the truth of it. A strange warmth he had not felt for almost a decade spread through him. Along with certainty.

She was an angel.

He was an ass.

"Oh..." The expression on Max's face fell as if he had just been told the truth about Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny. The pain in his eyes missing these last few days roared to life and reflected back at Finn. "I... I didn't know man."

"Know what?"

Max swallowed before beginning an intense study of his plate. "Nothing." Then he was unfolding himself from his chair. "I gotta go."

Finn called after him, but the other man was swiftly walking out of the dining hall. His mind went in a million directions as new data emerged, begging to be considered. Looking at Max's retreating form, he pondered going after his friend. Finn found himself unable to move.

He tried to focus, forcing himself to take a deep breathe. First and foremost he had to make up for his stupidity last night. Beg Emily to forgive him. Ask for a chance to love her. No - tell her he loved her. Always had. Always will.

Grabbing his phone, he searched for Lance's number. Lance could tell him where to find Emily. If her brother-in-law asked, he would tell the man he had a question about his upcoming testimony he needed her to clarify.

Why did he not have Emily's phone number? Oh right, because he was a stubborn ass.

Barely able to keep the stupid grin off of his face, Finn mentally pleaded with Lance to pick up. When he heard the man's voice on the line, Finn gave up trying to suppress his glee. He was going to get the woman he loved back.

This time Lance delivered the crushing news. He would be handling the case solo. Emily had been called to the New York offices, quite unexpectedly.

Once again, Emily Montgomery vanished from his life.