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E I G H T | THE REASON YOU LOOK BEFORE YOU RUN

"Carter, Carter hey-hey! Stay awake," Finn demanded softly, pulling lightly on the arm she had around his shoulders. Her head shot up and she gave him a half-lidded scowl.

"I am awake asshole," She snapped, though it came out slurred. "I'm just... resting my eyes."

Carter insisted on walking back to camp once Finn offered to carry her. She didn't want to be babied and persisted that she could walk.

She found out the hard way that she, in fact, could not walk (she could hardly limp either) and came to a bargain with Finn that he can be her crutch and support her, but there was no way she was being carried like a Damsel in distress.

But, Finn pretty much dragged her. Carter was running on fumes, her good foot could hardly support her weight, she was tired and the pain made her numb but she wouldn't give up. She was just too damn stubborn.

"Finn, it's time to swap, you've been carrying her for nearly two hours," Clarke stated, coming to a slow stop. Her neck was ducked a little from the weight of Jasper-- who was still unconscious-- despite the fact that Wells carried most of the boy's slumped weight. "Let Murphy take her and you can help carry Jasper with me."

"No!" Finn all but snapped, causing Carter's head to shoot up again, wide-eyed and startled. "He's part the reason she's like this."

"Finn-"

"-No," He stood his ground pushing his lips into a thin line. "He is not laying a finger on her. Not when I'm still breathing." Murphy rolled his eyes and scoffed.

"Oh please, she deserved it," He muttered bitterly. "I would have done a lot more than just cu-"

"-Hey!" Bellamy interjected, sending Murphy a warning glare. He looked back at the others with a set jaw. "We don't have time to argue about this, if you want the kid and Carter to at least be alive when we get back to camp we need to get back before it's dark."

"He. Is. Not. Touching her." Finn grounded out with determination.

"Fine." Bellamy sighed, dropping his part of the parachute that held the animal Wells and Carter shot down. "I'll take her."

"It's fine, I can just ta-"

"Finn let Bellamy take her." Clarke sighed, she was worried about both Jasper and Carter and all the while the boys argued (specifically Finn...) the well-being of the two injured camp members dwindled. "Please."

After a few beats of staring at Clarke with a conflicted look, Finn begrudgingly unhooked Carter's limp arm from his neck and gently passed her to Bellamy. "Be careful with her."

Bellamy said nothing, he just grabbed her waist tightly and slung her arm over his shoulder.  Carter's head slowly rose at the sudden heat by her hip and she looked up to see Bellamy holding her securely to his side. He felt a sudden warmness under his skin too, but decided to ignore it. She tried to wiggle out of his grip but it was all in vain, she was too weak. "I don't want your help." She mumbled, her head swaying forward and backward.

"Sure you don't." Bellamy answered sarcastically in his gravelly tone. Carter grunted something incoherently, but otherwise stayed mute and focused on keeping herself upright and conscious.

But alas, this is Carter and she's a klutz when she's not injured.

Her good foot hooked under a rogue root and she fell forward, yelping as she did. Bellamy still had hold of her and managed to stop her from face planting the floor from his sudden death grip on her waist.

"Woah, I got you." He spoke, more to himself. He hoisted her back up to her good foot and saw the others walking a few steps ahead, not even noticing Carter's sudden fall. With a deep sigh, Bellamy steadied her and once he was sure she hadn't hurt herself even more, they continued walking.

"Thanks." Carter muttered somewhat sheepishly her cheeks warmed under her embarrassment. Neither her or Bellamy said anything more as he held her and she gripped onto his shoulder.

                         ***

By the time they reached camp, nightfall had fallen upon the group and Carter was drifting in and out of consciousness even more. Clarke's legs almost buckled under the weight of her friend but she didn't complain, she only grew more concerned. All of them, aside from Murphy, helped carry Carter and Jasper back to camp-- due to Jasper being heavier and completely out for the count, it took two of them to carry him-- some found it easier than others but none of them voiced any complaints.

"They're back!" A voice shouted as they walked through the entry of the camp.

Monty ran up to the small rescue party and looked at the slumped body of his best friend,  "Is he..."

"He's alive," Clarke confirmed. "We need oil, water and bits of cloth for bandages."

"And what about her?" Monty's brows furrowed as he looked at Carter, who was leaning against Clarke. "Is she okay?"

"She's lost a lot of blood, but she should be fine." Clarke nodded.

She watched as Murphy and Bellamy uncovered the animal in the parachute and the Hundred cheered loudly, hunger glistened in their eyes. "Who's hungry?!" His voice boomed and the kids cheered louder. His eyes fell on Clarke and Carter's figures, the latter being unconscious, and his smile faltered.

Clarke shook her head slightly in disappointment before she disappeared into the drop ship, leaving Monty to get the equipment she asked him to get.

In the drop ship, Clarke set Carter down on one of the make shift beds and she groaned, slowly opening her eyes. "We're back already?" Her voice was hoarse and her eyes were glassy.

"Yeah, you kept passing out on the way back." Clarke smiled weakly, silently assessing Carter's appearance. She was still ghostly white and Clarke noticed as they were walking that her temperature was slowly rising and there was a small film of sweat on her forehead.

Carter noticed the worry written on Clarke's face and sighed, waving her off. "Jasper needs your attention more than me. Go and work your mojo on him, I'll be fi-" Carter stopped abruptly as she felt a queasy feeling rise up her throat. Her eyes widened and she quickly grabbed one of the empty buckets used to collect water before emptying her stomach contents into the bucket. Her body heaved with every gag. After four violent rounds of vomit, she lifted her head towards Clarke. "How is this possible I haven't eaten anything?" Before Clarke had a chance to reply, Carter leaned back over the bucket and vomited again. When she looked back up she forced a lopsided smile. "Okay... okay, Now I'm good."

"No you're not." Clarke argued with a hard mother-like look. "You're in shock."

"I'm fine. I needed that," Carter insisted, pushing the bucket away from her in disgust. "Look, I'm not dying, Jasper is. As soon as he's okay, then you can annoyingly fuss over me. Just please, help Jasper first."

After much internal debate, Clarke nodded her head and began to climb up the ladder where Wells and Finn took Jasper. As soon as Clarke was gone, Carter's face contorted in pain and squeezed her eyes closed as a small groan of pain emitted from her throat. Her entire leg hurt and there was a near unbearable ache that took over her entire foot. Her hands flung up to the dog-tag locket around her neck and she clenched her fingers around it. It served its purpose to take Carter's mind off her leg and to anything else.

                            ***

"Okay, let's have a look at this foot." Clarke huffed as she jumped down the last few pegs of the ladder and glanced at Carter who was dazing in and out, her hands clenched around a necklace that hung from her neck. Upon hearing Clarke's voice, Carter weakly lifted her head and sat up, leaning on her elbows. Clarke gingerly took off Carter's boot and sock, apologizing every time Carter hissed in pain. She inspected the bloody hole on Carter's foot and bit her lip as she furrowed her eyebrows.

"How bad is it, Doc?" Carter asked as she assessed Clarke's expression.

"Do you want the good news or bad news first?" Clarke peered up at Carter who looked like she was struggling to stay awake.

"What the hell, give the good news first. I'm... I'm an optimist," Carter slurred with a lazy smile.

"Okay, good news is you did no major damage to your foot which in itself is a miracle," Clarke informed. "Bad news is that I'm going to have to either stitch it up or cauterize both sides of the wound without anesthetic which means you're going to feel everything."

Humor left her face as Carter pursed her lips. "Which one would make the recovery quicker?"

"I'd have to cauterize th-"

"-Do it then." Carter instructed, her voice was stern and left no room for arguments. If there was one thing Carter hated it was sitting around and being useless. The quicker she can get back on her feet, the better.

"Are you sure?" Clarke asked. Instead of answering verbally, Carter nodded her head. Clarke sighed and left the drop ship to get the equipment needed for the makeshift operation. A few minutes later, Finn walked in and sat beside Carter with a reassuring smile.

"Clarke told me what she's gonna do," Carter heard another set of steps and looked up to see Clarke with a bucket full of hot coals and an iron rod protruding from the top. Carter swallowed the lump in her throat and laid back down, her frightful eyes glued to Finn's. Finn took her hand and squeezed it. "It's gonna be all right, I promise."

"Finn, go and get something for her to bite down on." Clarke ordered. Finn nodded and shrugged off his jacket.

"Bite on this." He instructed his best friend. She pulled a face before biting down on the fabric of Finn's jacket. He reclasped her hand and kept her stare.

"It's gonna hurt, but just try not to move, okay?" Clarke looked over at Carter, her voice softened at the sight of the girl, who looked beyond the meaning of terrified. Carter was slick with sweat, the dark red circles around her eyes had became more prominent against her sickly pale skin. "Okay, one... two... three," As soon as Clarke uttered the third word, a white hot, sizzling pain shot up the entire length of Carter's body, and even with the fabric of the jacket in her mouth, she let out a blood curdling scream and crammed her eyes shut.

Everyone outside the drop ship stopped what they were doing and looked towards the drop ship, there was a mixture of horror and curiosity on their faces. Both Octavia and her brother jogged towards it and pulled back the drape to see Carter laid on the floor, her face clenched with pain as Clarke put the hot rod against the curve of her foot again. Instead of a scream, Carter emitted a loud, painful groan and gripped onto Finn's hand tighter. "What the hell is going on?" Bellamy asked, walking further into the room, his eyes wide.

Clarke snapped her head in the sibling's direction before back at Carter. "Burning her wound shut, now you can either stand there like idiots or hold her legs down." Octavia didn't waste a second in thinking as she rushed to Carter's side and held down her legs. Bellamy reluctantly did the same.

"What happened?" Octavia asked.

"She fell down a trap and a spear went through her foot," Finn answered grimly before looking back down at Carter, he gently stroked the blond locks of hair back from of sweaty forehead. "It's gonna be okay." He whispered to her softly.

"I need to do the top of the hole now, this one's gonna hurt a lot more so make sure you've got hold of her legs," Clarke ordered both Blakes who nodded in answer. Clarke removed the hot rod from the coals, the bottom of it glowed a dull orange, she looked at them all before taking a deep breath, "One... two... three." the smell of burning flesh filled the air as she pressed the rod against Carter's foot. Another low scream came from Carter's lips and her whole body tensed. The pain soon becoming overbearing and one second Carter was feeling an excruciating amount of pain and the next, she felt nothing but dark and numbness.

                         ***

A few hours later, Finn was stood outside with his arms across his chest, watching with moderate disgust as kids took their wristbands off for food.

Moments later, Clarke emerged and looked at him with a half smile. "Carter's awake. Weak, but awake. It will take a few days until she can be back on her feet, and she'll probably have to use crutches," She reported. "And Jasper's stable for now, but without medicine..." she trailed off as her eyes landed on the Hundred all lined up ready for food and frowned. "They're taking their wristbands off for food? No way, I won't do it."

"You don't have to." He murmured, walking towards the food. As he grabbed three sticks of meat, Murphy turned around and put a hand on Finn's chest.

"Woah, wait wait," He forced a laugh, "You think you play by different rules?"

Finn raised an eyebrow. "I thought there was no rules." With that he turned his back and walked back to Clarke, handing her a stick. "Go sit over there, I'm just gonna give Carter this." He lifted the stick of meat for emphasis. She nodded and he walked into the drop ship, his eyes fell on Carter who was glaring at her bandaged foot.

"Did you hear? I'm bed-ridden for five freaking days." Carter mumbled bitterly, not looking up from her foot. Her voice was raw from her screams.

"You need your foot to heal." Finn shrugged, kneeling down to her level. She had her back against the wall, her injured leg lay flat on the ground in front of her while her other leg was up at her chest. "I brought you some food." He offered.

She looked up at the meat stick and frowned. "Is that the thing from what Wells shot?"

"Yeah... with the help of your badass shot to the head while you were half unconscious," He nodded, shoving the stick in her face so she would grab it. Reluctantly, she took it from him and inspected it. "How did you do that anyway?"

"Honestly, I was aiming at it's chest... but hey, why not just make it out as if I can shoot a gun like a freaking badass when really, I can't." Carter grinned idiotically though it didn't quite reach her eyes, and Finn chuckled.

"Well, either way it's dead and it's food."

"Did they get all the bullets out? I don't really want lead poisoning on my second day on the ground."

"You've already been stabbed in the foot, so what's lead poisoning to you?" Finn snickered.

"Answer my question, Spacewalker."

"I think they did, but you'll soon find out," Finn shrugged. He looked over her still pale complexion. "Anyway, are you all right?"

"I'm okay," she half smiled. "My foot stings like a bitch, but I will be better as soon as I can walk."

"Good," Finn breathed in relief. "Uh, I'll come check on you in a bit, I'm just gonna talk to Clarke."

"I don't need to be checked on, I've already told you I'm good."

"Of course you don't, Bambi." He smirked, backing away and towards the exit.

"Finn," Carter called before he could walk off, she looked at him with a serious, if not cautious, expression. "She does know about Raven, right?"

There was brief pause before Finn nodded. "Of course she does." He mustered a smile. Carter bought his lie and nodded her head with a tight lipped smile in return, turning her full attention on the meat stick. Finn turned his back to her and his face dropped as he walked out the drop ship and made a beeline towards Clarke.

                           ***

Monty slowly descended from the second level of the drop ship, needing a break from his best friends traumatized body.

When he successfully got down from the ladder his eyes shifted to where Carter sat, using the stick that her meat was on to carve her name into the wall. She paused when she heard his feet hit the floor. Her eyes widened, resembling a child that's been caught coloring on her mom's wedding dress... not that she did that or anything.

She used lipstick.

"Hey," Monty greeted, his eyes switching from her face to her handiwork with amusement.

"Hey." Carter quickly dropped the stick and coughed, hoping to divert Monty's attention from her graffiti. "How's Jasper?"

"He's unconscious, but alive." Monty smiled, walking towards Carter. "What about you?"

"Me? I'm all right," Carter shrugged. "My pain tolerance has gotten good over the years... you would be surprised how many times I've actually electrocuted and cut myself, not necessarily in that order." Monty chuckled and Carter joined in, relishing in the light atmosphere, even if it was for a few seconds.

"Clarke told me you did that running towards Jasper," Monty spoke again, sitting down beside Carter and gesturing to her injured foot. She couldn't find any words to offer him so she just blinked at him. "Why? I mean you didn't even know Jasper. He was a total stranger to you... why would you put your life at risk for him?"

Carter stayed quiet for a long time and Monty wondered if she was going to answer. Her gaze fell to the floor. "No one gets left behind," She shrugged. "This isn't the Ark. And I didn't risk my life, I just wasn't thinking... which apparently happens a lot. Besides, from what I've heard Jasper's a good guy, who in their right mind would leave their own for dead anyway?"

"Bellamy, Murphy, other violent criminals..." Monty listed and Carter rolled her eyes and tsked.

"Yeah, well Murphy doesn't have a 'right mind'. He's got so many screws loose, he's seconds from breaking." She chuckled bitterly. "Aren't they making people take off their wristbands for food?" She suddenly asked, noticing Monty wasn't wearing his wristband and desperately wanting to change the subject.

"Yeah," Monty nodded. "But that's not why I took mine off. I'm trying to see if I can modify it to contact the Ark- use it as a reverse transmitter or radio or something."

Carter sat up straighter and looked at him, her green eyes wide with excitement. "You think that would work?"

"Well yeah, if I can get it off without killing the connection." Monty shrugged. Carter's jaw became slack and a spark of hope ignited within her.

She still had a chance to warn her father.

Monty stayed and talked with the blond a little more. They talked about how to get the wristband off, their lives on the Ark and lightly joked around, they both liked how light the atmosphere was giving their circumstances. A few of the Hundred came in to get sleeping equipment and Monty noticed Carter stifling a yawn. "I think you need to get some rest."

"No, I'm fine." She shook her head, but another yawn betrayed her statement. Monty chuckled as he stood up.

"I need to keep an eye on Jasper anyway- Clarke's orders." He smiled.

"Pft, I don't need your company. Be-gone with you." Carter waved him off. He could see a playful yet sleepy glint in her eyes. Monty made his way over to the ladder and before he climbed up he turned his head back to Carter with a genuine smile.

"Thank you."

Carter frowned as she butt-shuffled her way back to the make-shift bed. "For what?"

"For sacrificing yourself for Jasper. I don't think many people would do what you did."

"Clarke did," She retorted. "In fact so did Finn and Wells, hell even Bellamy and his little bitch. Besides, I didn't sacrifice my life... I sacrificed my foot."

Monty grinned and shook his head. "Just take the damn compliment."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," She smirked, laying down on the bed as Monty climbed back up to his best friend. She smiled despite herself, as much as her modesty wouldn't allow, she did help save a boy's life and she would do it again-- even the impaling-her-foot part-- just so another person could live.

Not long after Monty left her, Carter fell into a deep sleep, so deep she was oblivious to some of the Hundred walking in to get shelter for the night and Jasper's moans of agony.

"Carter... Carter," a soft, delicate voice echoed through the empty halls. Carter looked around with wide eyes as she tried to find the source of the voice. A voice she hadn't heard in almost three years.

"Mom?" Carter called back. She whipped her head around again but could only see darkness. "Mom?"

"Carter," The voice grew louder. Carter stared down the hall in front of her and cautiously began to walk down it. Her bare feet padded softly against the cold metal floor. She finally came to an end to the dark hallway and her breath caught in her throat.

"Mom!" Carter yelled as she ran towards her mother. She was trapped behind the glass chamber door that criminals stood behind when it was their time to be floated. Carter pounded her fist against the door but it was all to no avail. She looked at her mom with watery eyes. "No..." She whispered in defeat.

"Wow..." Her mother marvelled in a quiet voice, she placed a hand against the glass and looked down at her little girl-- who wasn't so little anymore-- "Look how beautiful you've got."

Carter's bottom lip trembled and she leaned her head against the glass. "I miss you."

"I miss you too." Her mother smiled softly. Carter could never forget the pureness of her mom's smile. "So you're on earth? How is it?"

"It's..." Carter paused as she tried to think of a suitable adjective, but none did it any justice. "You would have loved it, mom. It looks just like your paintings."

Mia closed her eyes as she tried to imagine it and when her eyes opened, they seemed a brighter green. "As much as I would love to talk to you about earth, I have other reasons for being here."

"What?"

"It's about your father."

"I don't want to tal-"

"-We've all made mistake Carter, no single person is perfect," Mia explained, cutting Carter off. "Including your father."

"He executed you," Carter frowned. "How could you say that?"

"He had his reasons." Mia smiled weakly. "He was just protecting you."

"By taking away my mom?"

"There's more to it than meets the eye," Mia sighed. "What I'm trying to say is he loves you, he may have a funny way of showing it but he does, and so do I... I love you so much, Carter. But you have to forgive him. You're all he as left." She whispered and Carter looked down at her feet. "And that goes for everyone that's done wrong by you. You can't continue to live holding grudges, they'll make you bitter and I don't want to see my little girl become like that. Please Carter, I understand you're angry, but it's time to just let go. You'll feel so much better."

"But what if I can't?" Carter asked, her voice was raw with emotion.

"You're your mothers daughter," Mia chuckled softly, "You will. I know you will. And come on! You're on earth! Loosen up and have fun."

Carter sent her mother a pointed look. "I'm not voluntarily on earth. And I can't, I need to contact dad, I need to warn him about Shumway."

"Your father is a big man Carter, he can look after himself," Mia looked at her daughter softly. "And stop worrying, everything will fall into place... as cliché as that sounds."

Carter crinkled her nose. "Yeah mom, that was pretty cliché."

"But it's true," Her mom chuckled. Just as Carter was about to ask why her dad floated her mom, a man in guard's uniform walked over, his face was scratched out and unrecognizable.

"Woah, what are you doing?" Carter asked as he stalked closer.

"I love you Carter, don't you ever forget that," Mia whispered, a single tear ran down her face.

"No, no! You can't go! You can't leave me!" Carter shouted, trying to push the guard away. "No!"

"Goodbye Carter."

"No mom!" Carter sobbed, clawing at the glass. The guard walked casually over to the button that would send her mother into the darkness of oblivion. "I love you! You can't leave me again!" Her mom touched the glass one more time with a tearful smile just as the guard pressed the button.

Carter shot up with a gasp, her eyes wide and her skin was blanketed in cold sweat. It was just a dream, she closed her eyes and bit her lip. No, it was a nightmare.

It was still dark and there was hardly any noise coming from outside and then she heard it. Jasper's cries of pain. She cringed away from them and sat up further. There was a sudden sniffle from the entry of the drop ship and Carter's eyes darted to a small girl.

"Uh, hello...?" Carter waved with uncertainty. The girl sniffled again and walked further into the drop ship.

"Is Clarke here?" She asked in a small timid voice. Carter looked around and then back at the girl. She was small and frail, couldn't  have been any older than twelve and her cheeks were red from crying.

"Uh... I'm not sure," Carter answered, sitting up and leaning her back against the wall as she did earlier. "Is everything OK?"

The girl's bottom lip trembled and she shook her head. "I had another nightmare."

"You too, huh?" Carter smiled sympathetically. "I know the feeling."

"I just want them to go away." The girl whispered sadly. Carter bit her lip and looked towards the curtain that covered the drop ship entry.

"It can't be much warmer in here than out there, but I'm sure it's more comfortable..." She explained, looking back at the girl. "You can stay in here if you want?" The girl finally looked up at Carter and nodded her head before walking over to the make shift bed, Carter shuffled to the side so the girl could get comfortable and she passed her the parachute-type material to use as a blanket.

"What's your name?" Carter asked softly.

"Charlotte." the girl answered, snuggling down in the bed.

"Well Charlotte, I'm no psychiatrist, but I think what you need to do is just tell yourself it's a nightmare and that's all it is. It's not real, and it can't hurt you. You look like a strong kid and I'm sure you won't let this break you, okay? That nightmare doesn't have the power to break you." Carter's voice was full of so much passion and determination as she spoke, Charlotte almost began to believe her.

"Is that what you do?"

"I'm working on it." Carter sighed. They stayed quiet for the longest time and Charlotte stared at Carter's injured foot before asking.

"How did you do that?"

"I wasn't looking where I was going," She answered vaguely. "Now go on, get some sleep. I'll be here all night so if you feel scared, just wake me up and I'll be there, alright?" Carter had no idea why she cared so much about a kid who was plagued with nightmares. Nearly everyone had nightmares including herself, but there was something about Charlotte that was just too precious to ignore. Carter chewed on her bottom lip as she looked down at the little girl. She was too young to be on the ground. Subconsciously, Carter began to run her fingers softly through Charlotte's hair until she fell asleep. It was something her mother did when she had a hard time sleeping and every time it worked, she didn't have any nightmares all the while her mom did that to her.

Carter hardly slept the rest of that night. If it wasn't Jasper's moans of pain, she was too busy keeping an eye on Charlotte. She meant it when she said she would be there.