"You've been awfully busy, Deku," Bakugou's snarky remark grated on Izuku's nerves more than he cared to admit, but it didn't matter. If the pro had an attitude, he'd lean more towards violence first, questions later. 

Izuku hummed in a contemplative manner, turning to face the hero with a smile. "Running myself ragged for a family that isn't even mine." 

Bakugou tsked at him, glancing over his shoulder before giving the villain his full attention. "Look at you, being a hero and shit." 

The disgust on Izuku's face was instant. "I really wish everyone would stop saying that," he said with a tired sigh. "You all keep forgetting everything else I've ever done." 

"I haven't forgotten shit," the blond snapped, readjusting the bracers he wore on his wrists (Izuku wasn't beyond happy about it, it was a tick Bakugou did before throwing his first punch). "They're all just trying to convince you that you have a heart." 

Izuku raised a brow, taking two slow steps toward his childhood friend. "And you're not?" 

Bakugou rolled his eyes at the question, his agitation an almost palpable thing. "I'll leave that to the bleeding hearts. I'm here to make sure you don't kill anyone else along the way." 

"And if I do?" 

The hero's eyes narrowed and Izuku knew he got to eager. He had forgotten how well the blond could read him. The only one who even came close to knowing him as well was Hanta. 

"What're you playing at, Deku?" Bakugou asked, letting his arms fall to his sides. 

Izuku didn't like that one bit. He was letting his guard down, he was relaxing. It was the exact opposite of what he needed from the pro hero. He didn't seek out his rival for a friendly chat about his life choices. He sought him out to get beat to a bloody pulp. 

He released a tired and overdramatic sigh at the question. "I'm not playing at anything, just trying to remind all of you that I'm not your friend. None of you should trust me." 

"Well, I don't. Mission accomplished." 

Izuku shook his head, tutting at the hero and his lies. "You're a shit liar, Kacchan. You trust me almost more than Hanta, I just can't seem to figure out why." 

"Like hell I trust you," Bakugou said with a sarcastic laugh. "I nearly killed you today." 

Izuku fixed him with a deadpan look. "And then cried about it." 

"I didn't fucking cry!" 

Izuku put on his best crying bitch face and flung his hands in the air, "He's not dead, he can't be dead. He always dodges, he's fine." He watched with a sick satisfaction as Bakugou's jaw ticked at the reenactment. 

"Why didn't you dodge?" 

Izuku stopped short, all of his master plans momentarily forgotten. He hadn't expected that question. His brain kicked into action not even two seconds later, but he knew that Bakugou caught it. "You caught me off guard," he said with a shrug. "Take the win, it's the only one you're ever going to get." 

"I don't buy that for a second," Bakugou said, his eyes narrowed as he studied the villain in front of him. Izuku could pretend that he was miles ahead of the hero all he wanted, but the truth was he couldn't have been more than a step behind the villain, and lately the gap was closing rapidly. "You wanted me to land that hit. Why?" 

"I didn't want you to blow me up, I was just distracted with Kirishima," Izuku urged, praying that his voice didn't sound as panicked at his felt. He didn't like that the heroes were suddenly picking him apart like a science experiment. All his life, he'd never had to deal with that. He stuck to the shadows, never let anyone close enough to catch a glimpse, now look where he was: seeking out his violent childhood friend to bloody him up and instead getting a free therapy session. He faintly had to the urge to vomit. 

"You have eyes in the back of your head, try harder than that." 

Izuku's teeth grated together in anger as he sized up the man in front of him. This really wasn't what he needed. "I was distracted," he said again, this time in a tight and clipped voice. If the hero kept it up, the fight that would follow wouldn't be as fake as Izuku had originally planned. 

"Nah," Bakugou said, a satisfied and victorious smile taking the place of his previous scowl. He had Izuku right where he wanted him and nothing terrified the villain more. "Something in that fucked up little brain of yours wanted me to hit you. I bet that's why you're here right now, you want a round two. Maybe it's your own twisted form of self harm or maybe it gets you off, either way you're own your own now." 

"What?" Izuku asked through gritted teeth. There was no way he had heard the hero right. He was on his own? What the fuck did that even mean?

Bakugou took a single step back, his arms crossing over his chest as he did. "I'm not gonna fight you, Deku." 

"What?" Izuku's brain couldn't even comprehend the words coming out of his mouth. Bakugou wasn't going to fight him? Bakugou was turning down a chance to fight? A fight with Deku, no less?  Had he somehow entered an alternate reality or something? 

The blond shrugged. "I'm tried of playing into your scheming little hands. If a fight is what you want, look somewhere else." 

Being told no wasn't something Izuku dealt with very well. "And if I don't give you a choice?" he asked, titling his head ever so slightly as he tried to figure out a way to turn the tables. 

Bakugou mimicked the movement, just to piss him off even more. "You know that I know how to dodge, right?" 

This is fine, I can deal with this. I'm a super villain for crying out loud, I can get a hero to snap. 

Izuku ran his tongue over his teeth, looking off into the sky above them as he chose his next words. "You know that I know where your parents live, right? I bet their just dying to see their long lost nephew again, maybe I should stop by for a midnight visit." 

Bakugou was good at masking his emotions, even Izuku could admit that, but in that moment all of his training went out the window. His entire body went stiff and his breath stuttered as Izuku sat back and watched the cogs turn in his head. Watching the hero crumble and try to rebuild was almost better than the fight Izuku had been itching for. Almost. 

"You wouldn't do anything," Bakugou said once he regained his voice. There was a small tremble, but it lasted only a second before the anger everyone knew the hero for was back. "You love too much and you're stupidly loyal. You wouldn't touch them." 

"Are you willing to bet their lives on it?" Izuku mused, tapping his index finger to his chin. 

"Yes," the hero hissed, a defiantly lift to his chin. 

Izuku groaned, holding his hands up in a surrender motion. "Fine, you're right, you're right. I couldn't never hurt auntie and uncle," he trailed off as Bakugou's shoulders sagged slightly. A twisted smirk found it's home on Izuku's lips at the sight. "Good thing I don't care about that guy." 

With a snap of his fingers, Denki Kaminari was whisked away from his vantage point (the roof of the building next to them) and dropped right at Izuku's side. The other hero was frantically looking around, trying to figure out what the hell had just happened. 

"Basic teleportation quirk," Izuku said, brush his hands off on his jeans. "You know, the last time we met I could only hold onto about three quirks at a time, but then ya know, killed my dad and absorbed his quirk and now it's kind of... unlimited," he said while spreading his arms out in a grand gesture. 

"What're you doing, Deku?" Bakugou snapped, his eyes darting between his friend and the villain. 

Izuku shrugged, looking the electric hero up and down. "If you won't fight and I can't threaten you parents to get you to fight me, guess I just got to threaten someone else." 

"You won't hurt him," Bakugou said, but this time he sounded a little more unsure. "He's tape face's best friend. You can't hurt him like that." 

Izuku sucked in a breath through his teeth. "That's where you're wrong. I'm going through a bit of a break up at the moment and isn't it natural to want to cause your ex pain and misery?" 

Bakugou blinked hard at that. "You guys broke up?" 

"You guys were dating?" Kaminari squeaked. 

"Semantics," Izuku said with a flippant wave of his hand. "All you need to know is that there is absolutely nothing stopping me from snapping his neck, or burning him alive, or ripping him apart, or bashing in his skull until I find his tiny, little brain."

At that point, Izuku was just having fun watching Bakugou try to think his way out of the situation. Even if he never got his fight, he thought the night might be worth it, just to watch the hero panic like a fish out of water. 

That is, until a few million volts of electricity shot through his body. 

"Would everyone stop assuming I'm stupid as shit?" Kaminari asked in an exasperated tone, ignoring the twitching villain on the ground in favor of pleading with Bakugou. "In high school? Okay, I can admit I was stupid as shit, but I'm a full fledged hero now! I'm twenty three god damn years old, I'm in the top twenty, what more do I need to do to prove I'm not useless?" 

Izuku's answering cackle caught both heroes off guard. Honestly, neither of them expected him to still be conscious after that attack. "I think you're entirely useful," the villain said with an enthusiastic grin, not bothering to get up from where he laid on the ground. "Wow, short circuiting really does wonders for the brain." 

Kaminari scrunched his brows together as he looked between Izuku and Bakugou. "Sero has a really weird taste in guys." 

"Can you do that again?" Izuku asked, ignoring the insult in favor of chasing his own form of high. 

"Dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?" Kaminari asked in completely confusion. In all his years, sure he'd met the occasional fling that had a thing for getting shocked, but never had someone taken millions of volts and then asked for another. 

Bakugou rolled his eyes, anger and annoyance rolling off of him in waves as he walked up to Izuku. "C'mon, I'm taking you home." 

Izuku just let his head lull to the side, finding that his nerves were still a little fried. "Like hell. Himi and I are wanted villains, I'm not just going to lead you to our house." 

Bakugou shrugged. "Fine, I'll call tape face, then." 

"You wouldn't," Izuku hissed, his eyes narrowed into a glare.

"Try me." 

Izuku groaned loudly as he forced himself to sit up. "I hate you, you know that?" 

"No, you don't," Bakugou said while holding a hand out. 

The offer for help was quickly batted away as Izuku dragged himself to his feet all on his own. "Believe it or not, I can get home on my own." 

"I believe it, but I'm making sure you don't try to kill anyone else on the way."   

"Ya know," Kaminari spoke up, scratching the back of his neck, "maybe it's time to just arrest the guy." 

"Tartarus couldn't hold me, but I'd love to see you try," Izuku said nonchalantly as he cracked his own neck. His whole body felt weird and fuzzy now, he was trying to work out all the kinks.

"That really puts me at ease, thanks," the hero sarcastically mumbled.

"No problem, Pikachu." 

This felt like two thousand words of absolutely nothing happening, but you guys got to find out a few tricks Izuku has up his sleeves, so I guess it wasn't all for nothing.