Hannah

"I'm gay." Dane blurted out and my eyes widened. It wasn't because he's gay, it's because I didn't expect him to say it. I was way, way off the tip of the icebergs, hell I didn't even get to the sea yet.

"You're what?" I asked, dumbly.

I honestly just don't know how to respond to that but it doesn't mean I'm not okay with it. I am totally fine with it, it's just surprising is all. It wasn't like I saw clues on it, my brother was a manly man.. I never really thought much of assuming he's gay because he's all macho.

"I mean, I'm totally fine with it but just a little-lot surprised but... no one would've ever guessed." I said, recovering from the state of shock I was in. "Dude, why didn't you just say so? I mean, you've been crying all week and it would've been much better had I known the reason behind it. So what, you crushin' on your hot assistant or something?"

He grinned wryly. "No! He's not even a little bit hot. And I'm not crushing on anyone, I - I just broke up with someone, we've been together for 2 years now, we began after the accident, he was just.. always there for me and caring for me that one day I just found myself in love with him and he felt the same and everything's been going great until I was forced into reality and it just - ended."

Whoa, my brother's been dating some dude for 2 years and I never had a clue? sneaky guy. "Is he someone I know?" I asked, trying to narrow down the choices for the mystery guy.

He shook his head.

I sat down the couch, already back in my bubbly mood. This will be so much fun, I actually found a sister in my brother! Not everyone gets to say that.

"How did you two meet?" I asked, looking curiously at my brother. It felt like I'm meeting someone for the first time.. this'd be a good practice for when I move in to my future dorm in college and I'll meet my roommate.

"Well, in college we took up different courses but we see each other a lot and we just got along then you know, Then mom and dad died, I was done with college by then and things got busy but we kept our communication open and he was there to hold me together, he peiced me up bit by bit and one day I was functioning well enough for both you and me. He's my rock, that's why I'm still standing to this day, only I'm not sure where I stand in his life, I mean, I love him, I know he feels the same way but the situation's complicated."

"He sounds great, if he stayed with you and your moody ass I don't think you'd have to wonder where your place is in his life." I commented. "Why did you break up?"

"Uh, we came out to his parents, told them about us and had dinner together. His parents was great, they didn't mind it, or so I thought. Right after dinner, when his mom got a chance, she told me how dumb our relationship was. She said that a lot of girls can offer much more for him than I could. She told me that by letting him stay in our relationship would be just hurting him in the long run. I was stubborn back then and insisted on fighting but days later, his mom's words haunted me cause deep inside I knew she's right. Society's that fucked up. They'll see two guys together, holding hands or whatever then they think they suddenly have the right to be disgusted or judgemental. I can go through that for him, but I can't let him do the same, he's already done enough for me."

"Dane, you've been going out for two years and now you're thinking you can't let him do the same? He's gonna do it anyway because he loves you, that's how relationships work and it's not like we're in some drama film that you're gonna be tortured into hiding by people holding torches and wooden forks or something.. you're lucky you're in this generation, lesser people judges.."

He smirked a little. "It would've been great now with you finding out the truth, we wouldn't have to sneak around and stuff, we could just spend our time here. But it's over now, so..."

"Dane, fix it. It's not permanent damage and you shouldn't end a perfectly good relationship for no valid reason.." He looked like he wanted to fix it too but it's like he's sort of restraining himself.

"I can't." He said. "I want to. Trust me, I do. But his mom's right - "

"To hell with what his mom thinks." I shouted. "it's your lives not hers."

God, why is it always that one parent that just has to piss everyone off. Mitch's stupid ass dad and now Dane's mystery guy's mother. Why do they so much want to interfere with their childrens' relationships? If our parents were alive, I could already imagine things. Of course dad would be disappointed because he won't get a grandson but he won't show it.. he'd support Dane just as my mom would. That's where we got lucky and them dying is where we got unlucky.

We were silent for awhile and I was thinking all this through, Dane with a boyfriend... how did I never think of that? His phone suddenly rang and it caught both our attention. I waited for him to tell me who it is and it was who I wished it to be, I could tell from the frustration on his face. "What? You not gonna answer it?" I asked.

"It's him." he said, sadness filled his voice. "I wouldn't know what to say.."

"Answer it." I ordered. My brother could be stupid at times. If the guy you love calls, you answer it before you lose the chance, it's a basic fact how could he not know that?

I played the tv on low volume as they talked. He probably thought I lowered the volume so he wouldn't have a hard time hearing his boyfriend but it was actually so I wouldn't have a hard time hearing their conversation. By the end of the phone call, he and his boyfriend made up.He told him everything that made him run away, about the guy's mom and how it haunted his mind and that I know about it now and just everything thats happened the past days..

"I love you too." Dane said through the phone, a smile playing on his lips. "Yup, I'll see you tomorrow." My brother had a smile on his face that made me realize he was contented and happy. I gotta see this guy that did this to my brother cause he's working miracles. After hanging up, he sighed happily. "Thanks for making me pick up the phone." He said and ruffled my hair.

I slapped his hand away. "Dude! It took me hours to fix that!" I complained.

He shrugged with a playful smile.

Jerk.

Will

I was drunk. But not drunk enough to sleep with anyone. I seriously don't get it, it's been months and I still cannot sleep with anyone just because whenever I come close to it, I start to think of that girl I met in this very same place and then think that I'm cheating on her. I wasn't even with her! And I haven't even seen her since then.

This is so fucked up that I cannot even make sense of it. Why the hell is this happening? It's stupid and weird and it's not logical so I hate it.

As if things weren't bad enough, Jake turned into me. No, I actually feel like our attitude in relationships were changed. He turned into the playboy and now I'm this ridiculous guy. "Seriously dude, being a lady's man, it's the best thing that's happened to me." Jake said shaking his head happily as he drank away his bottle of JD.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes.

I couldn't disagree more with what he just said. I actually hated this -that -  life. Sure I get girls to sleep with me all the time but that's just it, at the end of the day those girls get back to their lives and may someday or the day after that they'll find their so overrated true love but I knew for a fact that I'll still be here, wasting my life away because that's the only thing I knew how to do.

"Yeah, you're livin' the dream, man." I replied instead as I patted his back, pretending he was doing the right thing. Because although deep inside I didn't agree with him, my thoughts are mine only and I didn't like sharing it with someone else.

But he was a totally different case. How long did we have to let him pretend he's fine, why can't he just admit that Andrea broke his heart and he couldn't cope, we could help him if he did. He's just making things harder for all of us by being in denial because we know he'd feel crap once he get over this fiasco.

"Hell yeah, I am!" He agreed, leaving me at the bar stand. If this were really the dream then I wouldn't mind staying awake.

"Hey Steve!" I called the barman. "Tell that dude I'm taking off okay?" I said, pointing at Jake who was making his way into the dance floor.

Steve nodded at me so I tipped him and made my way out.

When I finally got to my apartment, I groaned. A smooching couple nearing sex-zone was lying on the couch of my freaking living room.

"Seriously? Dane, I thought you guys cleared things up with your sister, why do you have to have dirty sex in my living room!?!" I complained. "Cant a man have some peace in his own living room? a man just wants some peace."

Dane smiled sheepishly at me. "Sorry, it's better here. And awkward there."

Harry raised his hand. "My living room too." He grinned at me happily. "And besides, I don't want his sister to meet me when we're like this."

"If you don't want to do it at his place, why do it here? Couldn't you, awkwardly well-fit men, go to Harry's room and make sweet love there instead of here where a man wants to watch some tv and get some peace and not watch you have sex."

They laughed.

"What's wrong with you?" Dane asked. "You seem a bit off."

"Well, it's annoying how Jake's getting some action and then you boys are obviously getting it as well, it's just frustrating but what the hell happened to me? Why am I the one coming home alone? That's not how it's supposed to work."

Harry smiled goofily.

"It's that girl, isn't it?" Of course he managed to bring this up, he's been using this on me every chance he got and he'd gotten a lot of chance the past weeks.

I rolled my eyes.

"It's not her, it's been a month and I've never seen her ever again.. why can't you let go of it? Jeez, let it go and stop teasing me about it."

"I can't because she's the first girl that knocked some sense into both your heads." He joked and I couldn't help but laugh a little.

"What girl?" Asked Dane, his eyebrow raised.

"A chick he met awhile ago, one he cannot seem to get outta his whacked up brain."

"Wow, a girl you can't get off your mind, she must've done a good job in bed!" Dane said smiling goofily at me.

"I can't get her off my mind because your dumbass boyfriend can't get over it and keeps bringing it up." I replied.

But I was ignored, Harry answered Dane as if I didn't speak at all.

"That's the thing, he didn't get to that part yet-"

Dane gasped.

"Seriously? I thought when I told you this that you would keep it to yourself!" I said annoyed.

"But it's him, we're like - one, I can't keep secrets..." Harry said lovingly.

Then they shared a passionate kiss while I tried to keep myself from smiling. I'm supposed to be annoyed. But in reality, that's what I want, what they have is just magical and I know it really is love. I never told them this since I always pretended that my life is the best but I envy them for finding each other and having what they have. Well, magic and wierdness.

"Okay, disgusting humans, I'll be in my room.." I said, holding up a piece sign.

I staggered into my room, anticipating sleep the moment I lied on my bed. But sleep never came to me, I lied awake for hours until I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up and walked to Harry's room, he's the only one I can tell anything to and if anyone could help me with this, he can.

"Dude I can't take this anymore!" I said switching the lights on.

"What the fuck's wrong with you?" Harry shouted, throwing me a pillow. "We're sleeping here."

"I'm sorry but I couldn't sleep.." I said, frustrated. "And I seldom get my needed sleep these past days and I'm high on caffeine and I'm going crazy."

He sat up, revealing his naked torso. Jesus, maybe this was a bad idea after all.

"Okay," he said, scratching his head. Next to him Dane was sleeping peacefully letting out soft snores. "What do you want to do?"

"I want to sleep."

He laughed.

"Obviously." He said. "Okay, so what's the case? Why can't you? Is there anything bothering you or -"

Oh, this really is a bad idea, They're gonna tease the crap outta me once they find out what is going through my mind.

"You know what? I'm sorry for bothering you, maybe you should just go back to sleep."

He snickered.

"Stay here you asshole." He ordered. "You woke me up and I'm staying that way until I find out why the hell you bothered me."

I grinned.

"Fine, Dr. Naked." I said and threw back the pillow he threw at me earlier.

"Wait, I take it back.. don't stay here, go outside and wait for me there, I'll just dress up."

"What's the point, you'll tell Dane later why not just let him listen?" I teased at how whipped this guy was.

"That's the point, I'll tell him later so might as well let him have some sleep for the both of us."

I raised my hands in surrender and exited their room. I waited patiently on the couch in the living room as I waited for Harry to come out.

"So, what do you need man?" He asked looking honestly concerned as he closed the door to his room.

I scratched my head. "Um, this is gonna sound pathetic and you're probably gonna tease me about it but, um, can you like hypnotize me to sleep?"

He was serious for a moment and then.... He laughed uncontrollably.

"What do I look like? The mentalist?" He asked, still laughing.

I threw a punch at him. "I'm serious man, I haven't been getting any sleep and I actually want to sleep."

"And you were so desperate that you asked me to hypnotize you?"

I nodded getting more embarrassed by the minute. Suddenly, I felt the multiple drinks I had earlier wear off. "I'm kinda drunk so I guess that is pretty funny." I agreed, chuckling.

"Man, If I could hypnotize anyone, I'd have hypnotized you a long time ago to wash those freakin' dishes."

I snickered.

"That won't work on me."

"Then just get some sleep you freakin' asshole, you actually woke me up for your drunk shit."

I laughed. Maybe I'm more drunk than I realized.

"Well, it was pretty funny."

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Hi guys!

So I like where I'm going with this book and if you disagree or have any suggestions you can comment or something cause it would really be helpful so that I could improve this book.

Thanks. :))