[Coltsfoot]: Justice shall be done

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Mia 11, Connor 13

He crossed the seemingly endless garden in the back of her house like a current, the cold wind in his hair, his breathing heavy, and probably with red cheeks.

His heart was nearly jumping out of his chest, but it had nothing to do with running, but everything to do with her. He was going to see her right now after being away for exactly 58 days. He'd been counting, although he was ashamed to admit it first.

He couldn't bear the fact that he hadn't said goodbye to her before he left... again.

He never said goodbye to her before leaving.

The thing was, his mother never warned him where or when they'd be leaving. There were no signs or time intervals to guess from. She'd just burst into his room at a random time and tell him to pack the most necessary things and be down the stairs in 10 minutes. The last time, almost two months ago, she had picked him up from school on their way to the airport.

He hated it. Hated her for pushing him around all the time, for using him as a tool against his father, for his father not really caring about him but for only keeping him around as a trophy.

Someday, he thought, when I am stronger, when I am taller, smarter, and older, someday I'm going to fight them. I am going to leave them, so they can never use me again.

Someday, no one is going to use me.

I am going to leave for somewhere where no one will be able to find me. I'm going to have something constant, someone that will make me want to stay. Someone, that's my Little Monster.

He could only hope she'd want the same with him; he prayed she would.

Just like she always understood why he could never say goodbye before leaving, he hoped this time she'd understand too.

Once their plane had landed, he counted the seconds and miles until he could see her again. And once his mother dropped him at home and drove away, he left his backpack at the door, even though he knew his father hated it, and broke into a run. He had to see her as soon as possible to give her the small tulip pin he'd got her from Amsterdam; he had to be wrapped in her warmth that felt like sunlight, and he knew exactly where he could find her.

But this time, he was wrong; even before he could reach their tree house, his feet came to a stop, as if on their own. Right there, just a few feet away, he saw her lying on her back next to the small pond. She had one arm bent, fingers dipped inside the water, playing with it, as she hummed under her breath.

The trees shielded her from the sun that was gradually setting, the chipping of the birds the only sound echoing in the peaceful air around them.

Time stopped, and if he had been breathing rapidly a second ago, now he was breathless. That was what she had been doing since the day he realized what his feelings for her really were.

She took his breath away.

No matter what she was doing, every time she was around, he was mesmerized. She had him completely bewitched, and he didn't give a shit what it could do to his heart.

At night, she was the star of all his wild dreams too, and sometimes they felt so real that he couldn't look her in the eye for the next couple of days.

Was it okay to feel that way about the person you'd grown up with? Was it okay to feel that way about your best friend?

He didn't give a crap.

So he grabbed the camera he'd been keeping around his neck for the last six months and took a shot of his Little Monster.

Another one to add to his growing collection.

|Chapter Twenty-Two| Coltsfoot

Present

As I make my way back to my car, it feels like I'm walking on clouds. I have a sense of euphoria I only feel when dancing, and the excitement for what's next is almost maddening.

I'm finally free to be in love without feeling as if I'm committing a crime. I can follow my heart without thinking about hurting anyone, and right now I'm pretty sure it's the best feeling in the world.

I don't need to hide my feelings anymore, and I am so ready to love my devil openly without being ashamed or scared. I am burning with the need to make the person I have been in love with since forever, finally fall in love with me too.

I know—I just know that this time around, I can succeed. His reaction and pull toward me are my indications, and even if I have to use my feminine charm in the beginning to lure him in, I'm ready to do it.

I can do anything, but let him go this time.

Once I am safely in my car, I text Connor. A simple message to check if he is awake and if he would run to me at the first given opportunity.

Because I am. I am ready to run to him in my nightgown at almost four a.m. just to see him. Just to give him my warning and promise.

"I want my bracelet back. Now!" I text him and even add a dagger emoji as if a threat to sound casual and funny, but I'm far from feeling it. I'm on niddles and he's the only one who can calm me down. Well, depending on his answer.

For a couple of long, long minutes, I just sit in the parking lot of my ex-boyfriend and stare at my phone, waiting for a reply from another guy.

After what feels like months, but is just over fifteen minutes, I give up. He's not awake. I come to this conclusion when my text remains unseen.

He can also be ignoring me, but if I know him at all, I think he wouldn't. He'd rather spat out something hurtful or crude than stay silent. After all, he still has to come to terms with wanting me.

It's okay; I have all the time in the world to make him accept it.

Still, as I drive back home, I keep checking my phone at every opportunity to see if he'll answer.

He doesn't.

Not until I reach my door and am about to unlock it with one hand, the other holding my phone as I stare at my text. That's when the blue mark suddenly shows up, letting me know he's just seen it.

My heart is beating in my ears; I forget the door and just stare at the screen, holding my breath. The dots indicating he's typing appear for a second before they are gone.

Come on, come on... I tell him mentally, leaning my head against the wood, not caring about the chill running down my body from the cold.

When the dots appear and disappear again, I almost curse out loud. Instead, a loud sigh leaves my body and cold lips, as I accept reality and close my eyes to let it go this time.

It's okay; one day he won't be able to ignore me.

One day he'll run miles to meet me, won't be able to leave me.

"So you needed this now?" I jump, my head hitting the door and my keys and phone dropping on the floor with a loud noise, when the all-too-familiar voice breaks the silent night.

Turning around slowly, my eyes catch Connor's silhouette on the stairs leading to the next floor, the tiny window behind him doing nothing to illuminate his features.

I just see his shadow sitting in the middle of the granite staircase, legs bent and elbows resting on his knees, as my bracelet hangs from around one finger.

He's here. He's come to me, maybe even before seeing my message?

He's here in the middle of the night, and it makes my heart bloom.

"Jesus, Connor, you scared me." I manage to say, hopefully not taking much time. I wouldn't want myself to look like a dummy when I'm trying to impress the guy now, would I?

"The audacity of you to text me while you're back at his house, fucking him." His voice is full of venom, and something I'm beginning to realize is jealousy.

"I didn't sleep with him." I explain my nightgown, taking a couple of steps toward him. As the dark space between us shortens, I am able to make out his frame better.

Clothed in all black—black jeans, a black T-shirt under a black leather jacket, and a pair of army boots—he looks like the best dream dressed like a nightmare.

His eyes slowly take me in from head to toe as I get closer, before the right corner of his mouth turns into a cynical smirk.

"Is that so?" He leans back, his elbows resting on the stair behind him, my bracelet now wrapped around his palm.

"How about yesterday? Did you let him fuck you in the bathroom? Right after you ran away from me?"

"Why do you want to know? You were busy with someone else first." I retort, crossing my arms against my chest to shield me from the cold creeping inside my bones.

I have a vague idea that the chills running down my body have nothing to do with the cold, though.

"Did you?" He repeats, his eyes staring inside my soul, letting me know he's not going to move on from this until I answer him.

So I decide to screw with his head and see if I can get a reaction out of him. If I can prove him he cares about me more than he lets himself believe.

"I should have." I start climbing the steps between us one at a time. "I should have let him fuck me long ago. Come to think of it, I should have asked him to take me right in front of you. Should have made you watch. Maybe then you'd know how I feel every time you let all those girls touch you."

I'm surprised at how my feet don't give out as I come to a stop right in front of him. Standing between his legs and looking down at his seemingly fuming eyes, I see the second his smirk is wiped away from the face I've drawn so many times before.

He bites the inside of his cheek to compose himself before borrowing a blank expression.

"Why would I? I loath you, while you're obviously a slut for me."

I laugh at his face, tilting my head back and making a show out of it before holding his eyes again.

"Come on, Connor. You want me, and it's driving you crazy." I tell him slowly, with a confident smile.

"If I did, he'd not have a chance to touch you. I'd have cut his hands off and sent it to you as a souvenir."

"But you've thought about it, didn't you?" I taunt him, resting one hand on his shoulder and bending down so we're face-to-face. The proximity between us is making me dizzy, but thankfully, I managed not to faint.

My God, I need an award for looking so brave when inside I'm dying the best death from his piercing gaze alone as his eyes rest on the wide decollete of my nightgown.

"Because you hate the thought of someone else touching me. I bet he'd know how to do it though—how to touch me to make me moan his name."

Connor sits up, wrapping his fingers around my wrist and pulling me down to have me even closer.

"Shut the fuck up." He orders with a rough voice, the anger radiating from him in strong waves, but even that doesn't stop me now.

I want to know how much he cares. And I know that it's not even healthy—the obsession I have with his unwilling reactions to me—but I test him further anyway.

How far can you go, Connor?

"I think I'd even scream it." I whisper seductively with a wicked smile, enjoying how his furious eyes narrow.

One second I'm standing in front of him with my chin held high, fighting him to get a reaction, the next I'm up, before my butt hits the staircase railing, with him between my legs.

It's so sudden, I can't hide the surprised yelp my lips release as I'm planted on the cold iron with so much ease it's actually scary.

Connor's fingers dig inside my thighs over my nightgown as he wraps my legs around him to keep me from falling and to press himself against me.

At this point, I'm hyperventilating because we've never ever been this close, our bodies wrapped together in such a tight embrace.

"You think you are in control, Little Monster? Well, think again," he threatens under his breath, leaning into me so our breaths mix. "Don't you ever utter that shit in front of me again, got it?" He says through his teeth.

"And why's that?"

He grabs my left hand, pushing it under his shirt and running my fingertips over the wound on his torso. I gasp as my fingers trace his skin, feeling the stitches. His muscles tense as I continue brushing his skin on my own accord now, his breath picking up.

Do I really affect him like this? I still can't believe it.

"Because you went ahead and stitched me up with fucking blue. Of course you chose blue, so every time I looked at it, I'd think about you. Now you're mine alone, Sky. Mine to destroy—body, soul, mind."

I swallow, my fingers tracing the corners of his wound gently. My whole body is shivering because of the things he says, his voice, and proximity, his warm skin under my cold fingertips. For a second I don't think I'll be able to survive him tonight, I'll just die from a heart attack.

Has this been his plan all along?

"Say it, say you didn't fuck him in the bathroom when I was just a few feet away."

Is that what he's been thinking since yesterday?

"How's this fair? You can sleep with everyone, but I can't even have sex with my boyfriend?"

"All I ever do is try to forget you. Erase you forever."

My eyes widen at his confession, and the way he presses his lips tightly together lets me know he is as surprised.

"How does that work for you?" I breathe out, securing my legs around him and, removing my hand from under his shirt to wrap both arms around his neck.

In case he decides to push me off, I'm taking him with me.

He doesn't answer for a long second; just stares at me, as if my face holds all the answers, but when I shift closer, pressing myself against his obvious erection, he loses it.

His hands gather the fabric of my nightgown, pulling it up in a crazed rush, revealing my bare legs and thighs. His hands run over the exposed skin of my outer thighs, fingers digging inside the flesh with a delicious pain, making me realize he's fighting himself not to go further right now.

Oh God, did I die and go to hell? Because I imagine this is how I'd feel if I burned in eternal flames for centuries.

"It doesn't." His lips fall on the almost faded bite mark he's given me a couple of days ago, and brush the skin there with his every word.

"You're always there, inside my head, staring at me with those big brown eyes, talking with that fuckable mouth of yours, ruining my nights and days too... making me unhinged, desperate to be the only one to touch you."

Want to be the only one, Sky.

"Touch me now." I whisper eagerly as the memory crosses my mind, too busy with leaning into his mouth. Realizing what I've just said, I pull back to stare at him with wide eyes, but before I can even think about taking it back, he gives me a genuine smile, stopping my heart.

It's so rare, so unimaginably beautiful, I'm ready to fully undress for him right now.

"I will. Only if you tell me your boyfriend didn't fuck you yesterday." He mumbles with a barely audible voice, one finger trailing up, dangerously close to the waistband of my white panties.

Oh God, I have never done anything like this before, so how come I'm dying for him to dip his fingers inside it?

"He didn't."

"Don't be a prude. Give me the whole sentence, Sky."

How can I not when he says my name like that? The bastard surely knows how to get his way with me.

"My boyfriend didn't fuck me yesterday." I manage to whisper before letting out a loud moan when his fingers dig inside my inner thighs, parting my legs further.

"He's never done it properly, has he?" His fingers start moving over my underwear. "You'd not beg me to touch you now in this dark hallway otherwise."

"We've never...he-he has never touched me." I manage to gasp for air as he starts to trace his fingers over me seemingly innocently, all the while holding my gaze to see the obvious reaction to what he's doing to me.

He's barely touching me, but even that makes me shadder as I slowly start to burn from the inside and cover in sweat.

"How so?" He is surprised more than I was expecting. I'd be too, I mean, I dated the guy for years.

"I-I didn't want him to. And he never will. We broke up."

"You did?" He searches my eyes with a satisfied smile, eyes sparkling with triumph.

I've seen this expression on his face before. Every time he'd draw a building my mom would praise him for, or when he took a photo on his old camera he loved.

"He's been cheating on me, but you already knew that, didn't you?" His hand between my legs stops the lazy movements, and I can barely register his cold gaze through the foggy haze of my desire.

"Is this revenge, then?" Gone are his whispers, now replaced with a dangerous tone that chills me to the bone. He's detaching himself from us, and for a second, I think about hurting him through a lie. Think about telling him that yes, this is my payback to my ex-boyfriend—to sleep with anyone available.

But that just won't do. The main reason I broke up with Jack in the first place was because I didn't want to love Connor secretly, and I didn't want to make us dirty and screwed up. So lying to him now will only hurt us.

Thinking my silence is a positive answer, Connor swears under his breath and starts to pull away, but I clutch at his arm with both hands to keep his touch between my thighs and shift against it.

"No, God, no." I whisper a silent plea for him to believe me. He has to. "This is all I want."

The change in his greens is obvious, but all of a sudden his hand is gone. I pout desperately and open my mouth to complain when his hand starts to travel up over my stomach, and past the valley of my chest.

Reaching the neckline of my nightgown, he undoes the tiny bow that keeps the upper part of my gown together, and yanks it down impatiently to reveal my left shoulder and bare breast to his hungry eyes.

For a second, I feel self-conscious — sitting on the railing, my skirt hitched up to my underwear and the left part of my white gown hanging loose under my chest while he's all perfectly dressed.

But when his eyes darken as he slowly moves his sensual gaze from my legs to my naked chest, then mouth, and finally eyes — as if he is drunk on me and doesn't know where to look first — my legs around him tighten, giving him the consent he needs to touch me again.

His fingers wrap around my neck, bringing my face closer to his, before he squeezes it slightly, not to hurt me but to make me sigh in anticipation.

"And that's it? There's no other reason for your breakup?" He rasps out.

"None." I say, but I'm leaning in to him, clutching his leather jacket in my fists.

"Yeah?" Connor whispers with a devilish grin.

I nod before his other hand moves down my body, to trace over my underwear again. He rests his ear against my chest, right where my heart is, and even though I'm dying to hold my breath, I'm heaving, my chest moving up and down violently with every breath I take.

"Your heart tells a different story," the devil says, looking up at me with those eyes that I'm pretty sure will get me into a lot of trouble soon.

"Obviously." I manage to whimper with a broken voice. "How can it obey me when you have your hand between my thighs?"

Connor chuckles briefly, enjoying how submissive my body is to him instead of staying loyal to me, before slowing pressing his lips against my skin.

A soft kiss lands right where my heart is before his tongue darts out to lick it, suck as much skin as possible over the bony part. His teeth bite next, to leave yet another deliberate mark on my skin.

I arch and arch against him as he moves north, sucking on the tiny birthmark I have on the inside of my breast, but he's so cruel with his touch and mouth, leaving me just hanging on the edge, never giving me enough for release.

"Why did you break up with him?" He asks as he sucks on the spot again, his thumb brushing my exposed nipple as if accidentally, but I know it actually is not.

"Oh God, do it again." I moan with abandon, my hands now gripping the cold railing for dear life. Have I really been missing out on this my whole life? Shoot, I am dumb.

"Tell me. Now." He commands with another brush of his thumb.

"Because I want someone else."

"Who do you want?" He asks followed by a new bite.

"You. I want you, Connor," I confess bravely with abandon, my chest moving up and down as I lose all control.

The second the words leave my mouth, I'm awarded with a long suck and a firmer touch between my legs.

I'm so out of the friend zone. So out of it, that for a second, I'm glad we fell apart all those years ago. Because if we were still best friends, we'd probably never dare to do this. Now we don't have a friendship to lose, just our clothes... and hearts maybe.

The hand on my neck slides up, taking my chin between his fingers, as he presses our foreheads together.

"You're either insane or stupid to admit it." He says against my lips, his hand adding more pressure. The ball of nerves inside me builds and builds and builds with delicious anticipation of what's to come. "I can break you right here and now with a single word. I can leave you in ruins, and you'll not be able to recover."

"I don't care." I moan loudly when his hand moves restlessly over my underwear and my cheeks instantly turn pink from the embarrassment. "I'm going to make you fall in love with me. Just wait."

His eyes darken, as they study every expression my face makes while I clutch on his arm pressed between out bodies, riding the high of my first release with a man. It's embarrassing how fast he gets me to my fall without even removing the silky fabric of my underwear.

For a second I'm starting to worry what he might think about my pale and very normal, un-sexy underwear. But when he looks down to where he's touching me, and adds more pressure to the spot no one other than me has ever touched before, all thoughts fly out of my head.

"Fuck, Sky. You look divine like this. Can't imagine how you'd feel when I..." 

Loud cries fill the hallway, before I bite down on my lip to not wake the whole unit.

Breathe, oh my God, I need to breathe.

Connor's free hand reaches out to release my lip with his thumb, as his intoxicated and hooded stare moves up, trailing over my lips and wide eyes, as if he doesn't want to miss a second.

"Connor, I... I'm..." I manage to breathe out as his touch becomes feverish, making me think he's dying to see me combust as much as I want to come.

When his stare becomes too much, I shut my eyes to save myself from completely losing my mind, but right before I start to fall down from the most earthshattering, scary and liberating height, I feel him jerk my body closer to him with a painful growl.

Breathe, I just need to breathe.

"Look at me. Don't you dare hide from me," he threatens, his voice serious. I feel him take my chin into his hand, and tilt my face up, so I will have nowhere else to look if I comply. "Eyes on me, Sky. Now."

My eyes snap open in a second, and when the first thing I see is Connor's dark greens mirroring the euphoria of my release, I clutch the ends of his leather jacket in my fists and shatter into a million pieces, his name leaving my lips with a loud moan.

His fingers don't stop penetrating and his captivating eyes never leave mine till I'm fully spent, and only then does he let me bury my face in the crook of his neck, to moderate my heavy breaths.

Once the most beautiful, epic orgasm of my life completely leaves my body, silence settles in and my mind starts to clear slowly. I can't believe I just came so wild without him even having his hand inside my panties.

I can physically feel my body temperature rise, blood rushing to my cheeks as I dread what's next. He's going to tease me so much for this.

Goddamn it! Why did he have to be so perfect at driving me mad with a single touch?

The thought that this might be the result of his endless experiences, boils my blood more.

Taking a couple more seconds than necessary, I prepare myself to face the consequences now. What else can I even do? The silence around us makes my anxiety run faster, but when I register that Connor has his arms tightly around me, his chest raising up and down against me, his heartbeast just as wild as mine, I start to gradually relax.

Slowly I pull myself back to stare at his flawless face, half expecting to see him smirk mockingly, but my breath catches in my throat when I find him staring at my face with adoration and bliss. As if me breaking around him is the most satisfying thing he's ever witnessed. As if I'm the most precious view he's ever seen.

It takes me completely off guard, but then he blinks and it's gone, gone before I could shower in his gentle gaze, commit it to my memory to relive it later.

"Hi," I whisper like a dummy, my voice hoarse, not knowing what else to say.

"I'm not the person you knew before." Connor suddenly says instead, searching my eyes. "No matter how much you try, you won't get my heart. Not you."

"Here comes, the killjoy." I mumble to make it less painful, brush it off with a joke and make an attempt to pull away, when he grabs my shoulders, and pulls me back against him.

"I mean it. Stop whatever madness this is."

"Looking out for me, are you?"

"Don't try to see things that aren't there. I warned you, you aren't getting my heart."

"I'm not just going to take your heart, Connor. I'm going to take your soul too. Every piece of you will fall in love with me before I'm done with you. You won't be able to breathe without me."

His body goes still as his eyes, shine with amusement and admiration, as if he's never seen anyone like me before. As if he's under a spell. My spell. As if he can't look away from me, no matter how much he wants to. Even his breath stops fanning my face, and for a second, I really think he's enchanted.

And then, before I can even check if the time has really stopped, he bursts into a loud laughter, the cruel sound of it breaking the magical silence of the night and a little bit of my heart.

"Fuck, you are delusional, Little Monster." He says, turning his face to the side, still cynically smiling at my declaration.

I chuckle for the fun of it, as if I'm in on the joke, and when he turns his head to look at me like I'm crazy, both of my hands reach to cup his face. He's motionless as I press my exposed breast against the cool material of his shirt and leather jacket, his obvious attraction against my stomach.

Pulling his face down to my level, my lips hover over his mouth, our breaths hitching from the contrast, the silence around us so loud. I brush the tip of my nose with his so gently, I practically melt.

My eyes drop to his deliciously distracting mouth. The things I've imagined him do with it... My God, this guy should be kept away from the world for our thoughts to stay pure.

Slowly, my lips envelop his lower lip, not in a kiss, because I'd never spend our first kiss on this moment of distraction, just barely there, to make him think I'm going to kiss him. Instead, I dig my teeth inside his lip, enough to pull at it. He doesn't say anything, doesn't even complain.

His hands come back to my body unwillingly, fingers digging back into my thighs, as if he's fighting against his need to touch me with everything he's got.

I tag at his lip, drawing a little blood, making his hand slide over my body to cup my breast, his fingers pinching the nipple as a payback. When a moan leaves my whole body from the unexpected contact, he loses it. His hands grab my waist, pressing me against his body and rubbing his erection against my thigh.

Oh my god, I can't orgasm again. Is it because I'm still a virgin? Is that why I nearly come every time he touches me?

Satisfied with his reaction to me, one of my hands rests on his left one, and once he turns that hand to intertwine our fingers together, my pointer finger gets to work, playing with my bracelet pressed between our palms.

I let him move me over his jeans the way he wants, the contact so intense another orgasm definitely starts to build in the pit of my stomach. Let him push my hair over my shoulder, burry his head there and trail agonizingly slow kisses all over my neck and chest.

I let him do it all over again, because I can't find it in myself to do what I plan to do next, and lose his possessive touch.

"Fuck, I can't stop." He growls to himself, moving me faster over his clothes, but of course I hear it.

Taking my time and letting him devour me as long as possible, my mouth moves to his ear.

"Still think I'm delusional?" I whisper, intoxicated by his scent, and hating myself for what I am about to do next. "Because here you are." My lips trace the shell of his ear as I go on. "Aaaall over me, as if you can't get enough."

Using his surprise as my opportunity, I press my hands against his chest and push him back. He is stunned, confused about what's going on, as he watches me pull the neckline of my nightgown up to cover myself. An innocent smile plays on my lips as I tie the bow on the front before jumping down to my feet and letting the hem of my gown flaw down.

I take a second to get my mind and heart set. It's so hard to let him go now. I almost hate myself for doing it, but I have to. I need to show him I'm not as fragile as he thinks I am. I am in love with him, I want him, but I'm not a cheap thrill either. I'm here for the long run.

Connor is glaring at me, his hair a mess and his bottom lip swollen and bloody. I hope bruises the way his bite on me did, I hope everyone sees it tomorrow so they know he's let someone mark him. That's what it is—my signature mark on him for everyone to see.

I make a move to pass him by, even though all I want to do is glue myself to his body and stay like that forever. But his hand shoots up, his fingers wrapping around my wrist, before he pulls me against his chest.

"Finish what you've started," he says with a aroused voice I've never heard before, and I wish I could record it right now to play it on repeat later tonight as I relive what has just happened over and over again.

The grave look on his face is as scary as it is exciting, because I realize he's fuming because I stopped him from touching me.

I look up at him from under my lashes and smile so big I think I'll need stitches on my mouth later tonight.

"See you around, Trouble. I know I will."

Going up on my tiptoes, I plant a maddeningly slow and gentle kiss on his cheek, again using his frozen state to free myself.

I know he's watching me as I walk to my apartment, bend down to pick up my phone and keys from the floor and then unlock my door.

"Oh,right." I turn around after pushing my door halfway open. "Thanks for the bracelet," I smirk, holding it up around my pointer finger, my treehouse hanging from the chain proudly.

"Fuck you, Jones." He mumbles with a deadly tone after a second of surprise, his voice doing crazy things to my body as I recall all the things we've done tonight. I wish I could see his face from here, but no, I don't need it to distract myself from what I'm about to say.

"Oh, don't you wish you did?"

And with a final wink, I'm gone.

~*~*~*~

Author's Note

Oh my, my! Is this not the longest chapter I've written for Trouble? It definitely is and I enjoyed every second of it. It's also the smuttiest thing I've EVER written, kind of blushed a couple of times while doing it, so please let me know how you guys feel about it. Was it hot, was it boring, was it funny, maybe cringe? Idk, did you picture it clearly as you read? Give me something to work with here!

I've always avoided writing this kind of scenes, because I think I suck at making it good, really good. I mean even MM doesn't have many of those, but I've written and planned so many chapters like this (and even more explicit) for Trouble, you have no idea. Just wait until you get to their... okay, my lips are sealed now lol XD

So pls, tell me how you feel about the smut in my books. Should I keep it up, or should I make it vague because I'm not good at it, please give me a sign, guys, Jesus, Buddah or my Fairy Godmother? Anyone, really? Could use a piece of advice right now.

BUT did you guys see THIS coming? I bet you didn't, not so soon anyway. I know that the readers familiar with my slow-burn style are probably shocked-shocked, since none of my books has this kind of scenes so soon in the MC's relationship.

I LOVE writing the soft scenes from Connor's POV and then switch to Mia's. I've said this before, and I'll say it again, Mia is one of my most favorite characters, and you can't change my mind. The confidence, grace and courage this girl has is soooo insane! Makes me wish I had it too.

Anyway, let's not make this chapter any longer and end my A/N here. Hope you ejoyed the chapter, more's coming very soon. Probably by the end of the upcoming week, so please support this story with your votes and comments. Also, I'd appreciate it if you could take a moment to share the story with a friend who you think would love it, or share any quote or art on your social media.

I LOVE meeting new readers, because all of you are so motivating!

This is it! See you soon.

Until then, I'll be thanking the higher powers that my family doesn't know English and then pray that the people I know in real life don't come across my smutty chapters.

But in case they do, here is what I want you to remember: I swear, I don't think about smut all the time... not unless I'm writing Trouble!

Love, Mel