The curse pounded away at me with its usual morning greeting. I groaned and put my head under the covers to block out the harsh light. I had to get up, but all I wanted to do was hide for the entire day.

I reminded myself that I told Serge I would go into the pack offices with him early today so he could get work done before the funerals were to take place. No matter how bad it was with the curse afflicting me, it was certain that the families of the fallen felt far worse. I threw back the covers to meet the intrusive world.

It did not take me as long to get ready as it did when I first had the magic on me. I was getting better at dragging my chains around while I did things. I had trained myself to use my mantra of what the pack wanted from me to get me through the rough spots.

The curse did not like how I could sometimes get around it, but it had little say over it. It was my mind and I would decide how to think.

It was hard, but I could master my own mind.

The reward for my assertive optimism was terrifying ice rushing through me, but I did my best to push it away from me while I pushed out of my room.

Serge was just walking down the hallway. "Good morning," he greeted me.

"Good morning," I agreed. I let him pass and then followed him down the hall to the main area of the house.

"Breakfast?" he asked.

I inhaled and walked into the kitchen. "Just cereal, please."

"Sounds good."

I made my way to the cupboard for a bowl. "Uh, what are you going to eat?" I asked him.

"Cereal."

I grabbed two bowls and brought them over to the counter and then did the same thing with the spoons. I forced a smile as he poured cereal into a bowl for me, then milk. I took it gratefully and began to eat as efficiently as I could manage.

As always, Serge was done before me, but I was faster than before. I thought about how far I had come in order to keep myself from feeling despondent.

Once finished, I got my shoes on and waited for Serge by the door. I risked a glance at him and saw him smile gratefully at me as he joined me. "Thank you," he said.

"Don't mention it," I said. The days after he lost someone had to be tough on him. I had seen the toll such losses took on my father. The funerals were the next day and I was certain that he was terribly weary.

We left the house and got in his truck. We drove to his pack offices and I hid in my space until noon, when Serge came into my little hiding spot with my lunch.

He was going to leave and a part of my wanted to stop him from isolating himself, but the curse constricted around me and there was nothing I could do to prevent him from going. I ate my sandwich as quickly as I could under the circumstances.

A few minutes after I was finished, Jodi came into my office. "Elise? Are you ready to go?"

I nodded and got up from my spot. I shoved my phone in my bag and swung it onto my back.

I followed her outside into the parking lot. Serge was not out yet, but we got into his truck and waited.

A minute later Serge came outside and got in the driver's seat. I took covert glances at him as we drove and hoped he was holding up okay. The curse clawed at me again, until we reached the community centre.

The community centre in Serge's pack brought back unpleasant memories of his fight with Landon and today's gatherings would not make it any better. The funeral was held in a picturesque little clearing with lines of chairs located not far enough from where Serge had almost died by Landon's teeth not that long ago.

Jodi stayed with me while Serge went off to speak with the pastor. I spotted Karen and her family already sitting near the back of one of the rows. I started walking towards them, when a warm hand caught my own.

"Elise," Matthias said in an undertone.

I grasped his hand. I should not have been surprised that he was there. He often went to these in memory of the fallen fighters, and there was no reason that this one should be any different.

I pulled him by his hand in the direction I had seen Karen. She smiled at me encouragingly as we approached. There was only one seat next to them, so we opted to take a pair of seats behind the family.

Macy turned around. "Hi, Elise." Her voice was quieter than it normally was, probably in subconscious deference to the situation. Such a sweet kid.

I smiled at the girl and responded, "Hi, Macy. This is Matthias."

She glanced at him inquisitively. "Hello, Matthias. Nice to meet you."

She extended her hand. Matthias grinned and shook it. "Nice to meet you, too, Macy."

"I'm Karen's daughter. Mom takes care of Elise some of the time," Macy informed him.

"I see," he agreed.

Karen smiled back at us. "Macy, it's starting soon."

Macy nodded and faced forward.

I met Matthias's eyes. He smiled, but he had not forgotten where we were. "Did you know them?" I asked.

"Yeah. Not as well as Ivan from Austin's pack, but I did."

"I knew Peter just a bit from a few times at the office, but I never met Nelson."

Matthias nodded. "I'm sure you would have liked both of them."

I nodded. He was probably right.

My attention was caught when Serge got up in front of the congregation.

"Thank you all for being here. It is with great sorrow that we have gathered today to lay to rest two of our brothers who lost their lives in the fight to defend those that they loved. I wish to extend my condolences to the family and friends of Peter, and also to the wife, children, family and friends of Nelson. Both will be dearly missed, not only in their contribution to the defense of our territory, but also in the unique and irreplaceable contributions they made in our lives."

There were a few murmurs of agreement from the gathered and Serge sat down in the front row, beside Leah.

I squeezed Matthias's hand.

I turned my attention as best I could to the service as Pastor Jenson began to speak. We sang a few hymns and said a few prayers throughout the service, but mostly I just waited for it to be over.

Tears welled in my eyes even though I did not know either of them well. My eyes burned and I kept my gaze low.

Crying over people I did not know felt somehow wrong, but I could not help but remember the grief that I had felt when we had lost other pack members in the past, or the deep grief I could never entirely escape from when my mother had been taken from us too soon.

Matthias put his arm around my shoulders. It made me feel safe and warm and oddly enough, made holding in my tears even more difficult.

I listened while the pastor spoke about the destruction of the original perfect order and the final victory over the grave awaiting at the end, but his words did not mean much to me in that moment.

When it was all over the caskets were taken to the graveyard. Not everyone who attended the service followed to the internment, but Serge had to go, because he was the leader and commander, and I had to go because I went where he went. Matthias stayed by my side, his hand never leaving my own.

I held us back a bit from the crowd of mourners and Matthias did not try to stop me. I felt out of place. All these people, even Matthias, had known both of the fallen and I was just a stranger. I was relieved when it was over and we made our way back to the community center hall. My remembered grief was enough that it slightly numbed the curses assaults against me as I walked into a hall full of pack members.

Matthias stayed by my side while the family and friends of the deceased laughed and cried together. Matthias spoke to a few people, but I was content to simply hide behind him. I could nearly have cried with relief when it was finally time for us to leave. Matthias sat in the front with Serge while I huddled in the back, trying to sort out my confused misery.

In spite of the dark purpose, it was still a beautiful day as far as the weather was concerned. When we got back, Serge went inside the house and Matthias and I went around to sit on the porch and enjoy the warmth of the sun.

Matthias pulled me down to sit on him sideways instead of taking my own chair, but I did not complain. He was so warm and so safe and it felt good to have my body in contact with his. He rested his chin on my shoulder and I put my arm around his neck and leaned into him.

"You okay?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Been better. You?"

He shrugged and we simply sat in silence for long moments. The sun heated my exposed skin and Matthias chased away the rest of the chill.

He broke the silence. "I probably should have been there."

His tone was even, but I could hear the guilt hiding under his nonchalance.

I shook my head. "No, Matt. It's like you said, you need breaks, too. You weren't on patrols, you weren't on call."

He exhaled slowly and evenly, as if he were actively trying. "I know, but it still bothers me."

I hugged him closer. "I know."

"I know I'm just one fighter, Elise, but even one person can change the course of a battle."

I closed my eyes. "I'm just glad it wasn't you," I confessed. "I feel terrible about that, but it's true."

It was his turn to engulf me. "Elise."

"Will this ever be over?" I asked.

He did not say anything for a long moment and I understood he had come to the same haunting conclusion as I had. The Trifecta was losing when we had taken too many losses already.