Matthias and I spent the afternoon together outside Serge's pack offices. It might not have been the most romantic date location, but it felt great to be able to feel reasonably relaxed for the afternoon.

We talked and we kissed and eventually Matthias fell asleep on the blanket in the sunshine. In spite of his stubborn insistence to the contrary, I had known he was tired.

I used the opportunity to properly look at him. It was not as if I did not know already know his features like the back of my hand, but there was something different there in spite of the familiarity of the past.

Something in the changed rules, the changed perception.

It was not as if I had never recognized that he was handsome. He had a straight nose and sharp features, although he looked more relaxed in sleep with his deep dark eyes hidden from me and his worries far from his mind.

I wished he could feel this peaceful normally when he was awake.

We had had fairly normal childhoods, barring the additional difficulties that came with living in a place so disconnected from the rest of civilization, so far north that relatively few people wanted to live here.

There had always been a vague awareness of the threat of the eastern wolves, but the attacks had been so few and far between that they had not really bothered me or the other children. Being herded to the shelters by our mothers had seemed almost an adventure, so disconnected were we from the danger that was moving towards us.

I only vaguely recalled the ripple of unease that went through the adults in the territory when the Rocky Mountain Packs had gone black, but I had quickly forgotten to worry about even that in the easy days of my childhood. A terrible thing, but not something that touched me directly.

I remembered when the attacks had suddenly increased in severity. Serge's pack had lost their leader and he had lost his parents. Matthias and a lot of the boys and a few of the other girls had begun to take a larger interest in training to defend our people.

Maybe I had been wrong not to be more active, but the idea of fighting, maybe killing someone seemed too difficult to me. I did not blame our fighters for their actions in our defense, but I imagined that they had some strength that I did not have.

Matthias could be a bit rough, mainly with the other male werewolves from time to time, but he did not revel in killing while he felt pride in his ability to lend his strength to protect our people.

Matthias was far from perfect, but I already knew his faults as well as I knew his many virtues.

Yet, under the chains of the curse was an increasing quiet certainty about my decision. My renewed shudders that even the heat of the beaming sun could not prevent were completely at odds with reality.

If the curse broke, I would have a future of security and happiness ahead of me. If my idea failed to work and it did not, I would have a future I could manage, and as Matthias had said, we would continue to try to break the magic other ways.

Surely there were other ways. Nothing in life was permanent and I could only hope the curse was the same.

Despite the cold rushing down my spine, the warmth of the sun was beginning to make me feel drowsy, so I slipped closer to Matthias and put my head down on his shoulder. A few minutes later I followed him into sleep.

* * *  *  *  *  * * *

I woke up when Matthias moved. I opened my eyes to find him looking at me. I smiled at him.

"You're beautiful," he told me.

"Thanks, you're beautiful too," I told him.

"I'm beautiful?" he repeated, not sounding particularly flattered by my response.

"You know what I meant," I said, grinning at him mischievously. I had not meant for my response to bother him, but I was hardly silly enough to look a gift horse in the mouth.

"Do I?"

"Of course you do. You can practically read my mind."

"Ah, sure," he said. "If only."

"You're saying you don't know what I'm thinking right now? Come on, take a crack at it."

Matthias watched me for a second. "I think you're teasing me."

"See? So now you can't complain when I don't tell you things."

"That one was obvious. Normally, I don't have the slightest idea what you're thinking, Elise."

"That's pretty bad considering you've had your entire life to figure me out," I pointed out as I tried to keep my smile off my face.

Matthias raised an eyebrow. "Eighty years won't be enough to figure out how females' minds work in general, let alone yours. I'm pretty sure there's fifty things going on in there at any given moment," he said, tapping my forehead playfully.

I scoffed. "Like men are any better."

"Males are easy. We're either thinking about something we're doing, something we're going to be doing, how something works, food or—" He stopped abruptly.

"Or what?" I asked him sweetly.

He looked like he was regretting his decision to explain the workings of his mind, maybe a bit embarrassed, which he seldom was. I laughed at him since it was so endearing.

Matthias looked away from me. "You know what I meant. Can't you practically read my mind?"

"Of course I can. Now that we're engaged all your thoughts are open to me. Just wait until we're married. We women get inside your heads. That's how Moramay manages dad so well," I teased.

Matthias leaned back. "Now there's a terrifying thought."

"Really? Why?"

He smiled, "Because you have no idea what goes on in here."

"How bad could it be?"

"It's not bad, it's great," he said. "So, what do you want to do next time I come visit? I've got rounds and training for the next few days and I'll try to get here when I can, but I'll be completely free on Saturday again."

I noted he used his diversion tactic to change the subject like he so often did when I was winning. I smiled at him and let him have the escape. "I look forward to Saturday then," I told him.

He grinned at me. "Me too. What do you want to do?"

"Oh, you pick. It's easier for me."

He nodded. "I'll think of something. And I'll try to get back here before then."

"Just so that you're taking care of yourself. I know I've said it a thousand times, but I don't want something to happen to you." My mind returned to the fighters who had just fallen the last attack and I pictured how I would break if Matthias was one of them the next time.

The thought made my heart ache.

"I'll be fine," he told me, as if it were entirely up to him.

I rolled my eyes and just looked at him.

"Hey, I promise, I'm careful. Those eastern wolves are weak, I promise you."

I frowned. "I know you can take them one on one, but what if they overwhelm you? The attacks are getting more serious, I can tell even if no one will tell me straight out. There were four casualties last night."

Matthias moved closer to me. "I'm not trying to keep things from you, Elise, but you have enough to worry about yourself."

"I can handle it," I assured him.

"You keep things from me, too," he pointed out, completely waylaying my argument.

"I do not," I lied.

He raised an eyebrow skeptically. "I can see the differences, Elise. You don't like food anymore, for one."

"Well, it's not that I don't like it..."

"I do know everything about you, so you can't hide things like that from me."

I shivered, but not in fear. "Oh?"

"Yeah. I love you."

"Sorry I took so long to clue in."

"It's not your fault. I should have said something."

"I should have seen."

He shrugged.

"I did know you were hot," I offered.

He glanced at me with surprise.

"Well, I mean, look at you." Matthias had the body of a man who worked and trained hard and I had to work just as hard not to properly appreciate it.

He looked satisfied with my words, although still a bit uneasy. It was funny how easily I could discomfit him now that everything was in the open.

"I'd rather look at you."

I felt the heat rise in my cheeks. It was funnier when it was me teasing him, not the other way around.

"I didn't know how easy it was to embarrass you," he commented.

"I'm not embarrassed," I protested, although it was a bold faced lie.

"You're blushing."

"Shut up, Matt. You're no better."

He grinned more widely. "It's cute."

"Matt."

"Elise?" he responded innocently, but I knew what he was doing. This was revenge, because I started it.

I resisted the urge to intentionally look pathetic so he would feel guilty for flustering me. Instead I shot back, "You're pretty cute, too."

"Ugh, there's nothing cute about me."

"Are you sure? You're pretty fluffy when you transform."

He play tackled me and went for my sides with his fingers. "Ack, Matt, stop! I don't like being tickled!"

"And I don't like being called cute."

"Matt!" I laughed as I fought back. "I know all your weaknesses," I threatened.

In spite of my superior knowledge of his weak spots, somehow I still ended up pinned beneath him, and all thoughts of fighting with him scattered out of my mind. He looked down at me, a lock of his hair escaping from his braid and falling across his face.

My heart pounded, but there was no fear. I felt heat. I felt excitement.

I felt hope and even the curse could not crush it in that moment.

Unfortunately for my state of mind, the time that Matthias had to leave came and went. I was sad when he was gone, and anxious from the renewed attacks of the curse. As always, it seemed to redouble its efforts after I had a short period of relief. The magic was irritatingly persistent, if nothing else.

We cleaned up, and I made my way back inside the office and hid again in my little crevice, until Serge came to get me to go to his home. He was as quiet as ever and I wished that he would not feel so downtrodden. There was nothing I could do about it though unfortunately. We ate supper together with Karen and I went out for a run before returning to my room to hide.

Tuesday dawned and I went through the motions before it again waned. I was disappointed I had not heard from Matthias again since I had seen him, although I was well aware that he had a lot to do.

I showered and got into my cozy pajama pants and a t-shirt and snuggled in my bed. I laying there in the darkness, I brought my phone to life and looked at the screen. I had missed a call from Matthias, probably while I was out running through the forest, so I called him back with my icy fingers.

The phone was answered quickly. "Hello?"

"Hi, Jesse, is Matt there?"

"Sorry, Elise. He's out on patrol."

I was disappointed and the curse triumphantly gnawed on the back of my neck. "Thanks anyways," I said, hoping to keep my distress from my voice.

"I'll let him know you called."

"Thanks."

I hung up my phone. I sighed and curled up with my lizard.