For hours I huddled in the corner of the room they had given me and cowered whenever Karen came in to check on me or whenever I heard even the sound of someone moving in the house beyond the door.

It took me a long time to work up the courage to even explore the room with my eyes and even longer for me to get up and actually inspect this place where I had landed.

As I walked around the plain bedroom, every cell in my body screamed for me to find a corner and resume my attempt at shrinking out of existence like a good thrall should.

I might have completely given in except somewhere deep under my terror were the first tendrils of my building frustration.  Deep down, the real, suppressed me did not want to simply submit to the magic threading through my cells.  I wanted to fight.

I wanted to scream instead of whimper, rage instead of shake, and cry out my pain instead of this horrible silence the magic inflicted upon me.

My frustration was sort of a comfort because it reminded me that she was still there in the shadows.  The free woman, the free werewolf was not truly dead, just suppressed under uncountable heavy magic chains.

I looked at the heavy quilt over the bed that I would sleep in when night fell.  There was a solid desk and chair.  I could not bring myself to open the drawers to see what was inside.

The dresser was the same, I could not say whether the drawers were still full of items from a previous occupant of this room, or empty and waiting for me to fill them with mementos of my life.  I could not bring myself to even touch the handles, it felt like too great of a trespass.

There was a mirror on the wall behind the dresser.  I avoided it, because I was afraid of what I might see now that I was a thrall.

I wanted to keep my memory of what I had looked like before.  I did not want confirmation of what I imagined I now looked like, a gaunt wraith with sleek black hair and hollow brown eyes.

The closet door was slightly ajar so I peeked inside without the need to touch it.  It looked empty.  Perhaps I had been placed in a guest room.

If this was to be my room, it would be a guest room no longer, since there was no way I would be leaving it.  I felt my heart sink.

I walked back to the bed and my eyes lit upon the backpack on the floor that I had unknowingly brought.  Someone back home must have packed it for me.  I walked over to it and crouched down beside it.

I wondered who had done that. Maybe Sean, maybe my step mom, maybe whatever woman of the pack was handy when I left.

Swallowing hard, I wondered when I would get to see them.  We had little social contact with the other packs so it might be weeks or even months before I would see a friendly face again.

I swallowed back my whimper and forced myself to reach for my backpack.  Even this was difficult to do, which was madness, because it belonged to me.

I knew it was mine, but the magic did not care.  I did not even feel I was allowed to touch my own things.

My hand stretched forward.  It shook with my indecisive fear.

My daring action was interrupted by a knock on the door.

I jumped away from the backpack so quickly I almost fell backwards.  I caught myself and shrunk into a crouch on the floor as I waited for the door to open.

"Elise?" Karen asked with a second knock before she pushed open the door.  I looked at her feet.  I recognized her patterned socks from the other times she had come in to talk to me.

I could not make myself answer.

"There's someone here to see you," she informed me.

I whimpered; not sure if it was allowed, not sure if I even wanted anyone I knew to see me further in this dismal state.

"He says his name is Matthias."

I let out another pathetic sound.  I could only imagine how upset he might be at what happened.  I had not even gotten a chance to see him before I had left home.  I hoped he was not losing his temper.  Matthias was generally fun and easy going until his protective instincts kicked in and I had no doubt he was furious right now.

I missed him already, but my body refused to move.

"It's up to you if you want to see him or not," Karen prodded gently.

Summoning all the strength available to me, I said my first words since I had left home.

"I'm a-allowed?" I managed to ask through my constricted vocal cords.

"I would not have made the suggestion if you were not," she told me.  "You're allowed to do anything reasonable, Elise."

Even though she said that, the magic had a different plan.  I did not move.

Karen moved closer to me and I shrank back against the side of the bed.

"Do you want to see him, Elise?"

I nodded slightly.

She had caught my movement.  "I'm sorry in advance, but I'm going to try something," she said apologetically.

Her sympathetic tone became direct.  "Elise, go outside and meet with Matthias, if you want to."

It was almost as if my chains dissolved at her words, but I was not free because new chains wrapped themselves around me and dragged me forward.  Moving was easy; staying huddled in place was now impossible.

I got up and slipped past, careful not to touch Karen as I went by.  I walked down the hall and into the open living room and kitchen area, a blur of deep red and beige and brown.  I spotted the door that looked as if it would take me outside.

I twisted the door handle and pushed the door open.  I could only sort of see Matthias from the side of my vision and for a moment I feared that I could no longer look at him either, but then I realized it was because he was standing too close to the man who I was certain I would never be able to bring myself to look at.

I walked down the steps, at once repelled by Serge's presence and pushed forward by Karen's order.  I could feel myself shaking harder, because the magic was leaving me nowhere safe to go.  Fear surrounded me on all sides.

Matthias growled low in his throat at the sight of me and I wondered just how bad I looked to him.  My false pack had not known me as I was before I was cursed, but Matthias had known me forever so he would see the difference immediately.

"You had better fix this," he snarled at Serge.

"I intend to, if I can," Serge responded coldly.

"That's not good enough.  Look at her.  She is not the sort of person that magic was intended for.  If anyone deserves punishment, it's you."

Serge did not respond.  My hands quivered as I listened to their conflict.  I worried about Matthias while the magic engendered dismay at his aggressive tone and the disrespect he was showing my false leader. 

I wished I could look towards them and see what I was missing in the silent interplay between the two.

I felt as much as heard Karen come up behind me by the slight prickles of fear rushing over my skin.

She spoke, clearly addressing Serge.  "If you order her to speak with him freely, I believe she would have an easier time."

Serge paused.  "I'll give you an hour for now," he told Matthias.

From the corner of my eye I could see Matthias stiffen with his rage.  He was not one to bow to authority if he considered it illegitimate.

Serge spoke to me.  "Elise, please relax and spend time with your friend."

I noticed it was not an actual order, but I was pretty sure the magic would treat it as such.  At least it was a command I wanted to follow.

"Karen, get them settled on the back deck and then let them have some privacy."

"Yes, Serge."

I found it easy to walk along with Matthias following Karen.  I could not look at him when he was near any members of my false pack, but now that he was beside me I could meet his eyes like I always had since my earliest memories of my friend.

I took in the comfortingly familiar features of his face, although now his strong jaw was clenched with his anger at what had happened and his deep brown, nearly black eyes looked out from under a brow furrowed in tension.

His long black hair hung loose down his back.  He sometimes wore it in a braid, but it always came undone when he transformed.  I assumed he had run over here in his wolf form rather than driving a borrowed vehicle.

It was good to see him.  I tried to smile at him reassuringly and I found that if I concentrated very hard and kept Karen out of my line of sight I could manage something like a smile.

He returned my smile half-heartedly.  I appreciated that he tried, for me.

Karen led us around the house.  "Make yourselves comfortable.  I'll get you both refreshments and then give you some time."

She paused and presumably looked at Matthias.  "I'm Karen, by the way, and Serge put me in charge of trying to help Elise.  If you can coax her to eat and drink please do.  I haven't managed to get her to consume anything since she got here and I really don't want it to get to the point where we have to force her if I can avoid it."

"I'll try," Matthias promised.  His rage seemed to have lessened now that he was well away from Serge.

He took my hand and led me towards a pair of chairs and helped me sit down.  I saw the back of Karen's shoes as she walked away and entered the back door of the house.

I looked at Matthias.  His eyes were sweeping over me.  "How are you, really?" he asked.

I smiled shakily.  "I've b-been better," I admitted.  It was not like he would have believed a lie.  He knew me too well.

"D-did my dad send you?" I asked him.

"No, but he did not exactly try to stop me, either."

"How's he doing, Sean, Moramay, all the others?" I asked, searching his face.  Up close, I could see that he looked tired and frustrated.  I doubted my father looked better.  This was the last thing either of them needed, I thought guiltily.

"He's understandably upset and furious.  Sean and the rest are on edge.  Everybody's first instinct is to rescue you from this curse, but we haven't figured out how yet."

"I don't think i-it's possible," I told him slowly.  I hoped this mess I had gotten myself into would not hurt the efforts to protect ourselves from the eastern invaders.

"Oh, it's possible."  Matthias chuckled darkly.  "If it wasn't for those eastern bastards Serge would be dead already and you would be free.  He's damn lucky that he's a good defender and that we need his forces."

I felt fear curl its tendrils through me at the idea of my false leader being killed.  The magic made me care more than I should have.  "D-don't say that, Matt," I pleaded.

"Why not?" he asked, but before I could try to answer Karen returned with a tray of snacks and lemonade.  I turned my gaze away from her direction to inspect the evergreens beyond the yard.

Karen left swiftly without saying anything.  I imagined she probably smiled at Matthias encouragingly as she left, but I had no way of telling for sure.

Once we were alone again, Matthias continued.  "He deserves to die for what he did to you, Elise.  That curse magic is not something to be used lightly and all the leaders know that.  The only thing you might have done wrong was disobey Nick and that's none of his damn business."

I shivered.  "I definitely r-regret that decision," I told him wryly.  "I-I had a bad feeling, I didn't know it was because my psychic powers were telling me I was going to be inadvertently turned thrall."

He grinned half heartedly at my pathetic attempt at a sarcastic joke.  "Still, I would love to rip his throat out."

I felt the cold magic sweep over me and angry fear that was not truly my own.  "Don't thr-threaten h-h-him, Matt.  The m-magic makes me want to h-hurt anyone who threatens h-him."

He frowned.  "Fine, it's an empty threat anyway.  He's safe from me, but we're going to try to figure out a way to get you out of this mess and you'll never have to see that bastard again, I promise."

I smiled at his empty assertion, not because I believed it, but rather because I wanted him to feel better.

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