Walking out of the bathroom, I feel somewhat self-conscious walking back into the bedroom with no clothes on, but I smile when I see him laid there on my bed.

"You look cold, come here." He lifts the blankets and sadly he's wearing his boxers again. I suppress the hidden sadness I hold against him for that, and I giggle, walking over to him before climbing over him, so I'm on the other side, next to the wall. "See, you're cold."

"The bathroom is cold." I whisper, getting comfortable next to him on this teeny, tiny bed. I don't know how we're both lying here together. "You're warm."

"I know because I only took five seconds in there." He whispers and I groan, closing my eyes. "You tired?"

"Yeah, I woke up at four this morning." I whisper.

"Nightmare?" He asks gently and I nod against his chest, gulping down the knot in my throat. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, it's okay." I shake my head slightly.

"Is that why you have the drugs?" He asks.

"Can we not?" I ask, sighing.

"You have a lot of drugs in that drawer, Francesca, I'm only looking out for you." He says, and I sit up, running my fingers through my hair.

"I haven't touched them." I say, looking back at him.

"But that doesn't explain why you have them in the first place." He frowns.

"You've turned up today, you can't just come in here and expect me to tell you everything. I don't have to explain myself and my things to you, Ethan." I say and he sucks his teeth before getting up. "What are you doing?"

"I tell you that I'm here for you. Have I not earned your trust because I trust you with everything? I've opened up to your countless times, but all you've done is opened your legs. Why, for once, can't you open your heart to me? You like me, I like you but you won't trust me. I'm here, with you and telling you that I'm someone you can trust and talk to. You are obviously dealing with something and I know you are but dealing with it alone with kill you. It will eat you up inside and kill you, Francesca!" He exclaims, and I wipe the angry tears from my cheeks before getting out of bed with shaky hands.

"You have no place to tell me what I can and cannot do! So leave, Ethan. I was fine before you showed up. I was coping." I say, pulling my shirt over my head.

"The first time I saw you, you were having a panic attack. You had tears streaming down you face! If that was coping, I don't know what you are right now. I am not saying you need to tell me but tell someone. Get some help because I don't want to attend yet another funeral because someone, I care about chose drugs and alcohol. I'm here, standing right in front of you and you can't even look me in the eyes." He says, laughing dryly, and that's when I finally do. His eyes, bloodshot and dilated, tears threatening to spill over.

"My past is my past, and I told you I can't speak about it. I'm living in the present. Is there anything wrong with that?!" I practically scream at him, and he grabs hold of my wrists, pulling me closer to him.

"Yes, yes there is. You're using drugs to cover up the fact you are obviously in pain. Not dealing with it is going to make this worse and worse until you can't deal with it no longer. It will only blur the pain so much, Francesca until it doesn't and then what? I am not judging you, we've all done the occasional drugs, but I am sincerely looking out for you. You are a beautiful, smart girl. You have a future, and I don't think your parents would like a phone call hearing that their daughter has overdosed over something she could have dealt with." He says and my heart clenches, anger souring to my head.

"How fucking dare you! You know nothing about my parents, or what drugs I take! I would never do that. I would never." I say, slowly breaking down with every word I speak before finally collapsing into sobs, and he pulls me into his chest as I shake, letting the tears fall.

"Francesca, I'm here for you but you need to start being a little open with me. I'm not here to judge you, I'm here to be someone you can speak to." He says lowly, and my lips trembles as the words sink in. Deep down, I know that, I do but it hurts. "What happened that was so bad that have the need to have drugs in your bedside table on stand-by?"

"I'm not ready, I told you that earlier. Ethan, please just respect that I aren't ready to talk about this yet." I whisper.

"When you are... I'm going to be here, always. Whether that's days, weeks or months, I'm always here to listen and you're never alone. But please, please just be careful with the drugs. I don't want to attend your funeral, baby." He murmurs, and my heart picks up at the nickname.

"You won't because I am careful. The only time I've had a bad time was when you took care of me that night. I haven't really taken or done anything since that night, only a joint now and again." I say, telling the truth, and he sighs, running his hands over my back.

"I need you to be safe. You have a full bag of cocaine here, and all kinds of different pills. When... when were you even going to take these?" He asks.

"I thought I were going to be alone tonight. So, I guess tonight. Just a few lines. I just wanted..." I stop myself and sigh.

"You wanted some peace, to stop your thoughts?" He asks and I nod.

"I wanted for the pain to stop. Just for some silence. I don't remember the last time I could be alone, sit in bed and have a blank mind. My mind is fixated on... on the incident that happened, and I can't. I can't talk about it just yet." I say, wiping the tear that escapes and he kisses the top of my head, keeping his arms around me.

"Please tell me, Francesca, I'm dying to help you. I know... I know it's going to hurt, but I need to understand what you're going through." He whispers.

"I can't. Can't you see how much I want to yell and tell you everything? I want to scream. I want to tell someone but it hurts too much to merely think about it. No one will understand, Ethan. I can't physically or mentally tell you this, not yet. Just be patient with me and hold me for now." I whisper, hoping he doesn't leave me.

"I hate to know you're going through something that I can't help you with. But I'm here for you, and you know that, so I'm going to drop it but please come to me and ring me when you need me." He murmurs and my heart rate steady's, the rapid beating calming down now that I know he's not leaving.

"Thank you. Now, I'm hungry and want pizza. Do you want something?" I ask and he smiles down at me.

"Chicken and bacon with barbeque?" He asks.

"Of course." I nod.

"Then yes, and ice cream." He adds and I smile, draping my arms around his neck.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you." I whisper, needing to apologize.

"I'm sorry too." He says, moving my hair behind my ear. "You told me not to push you, and I did exactly that. I shouldn't have and I crossed a line."

"You had good intentions, and you were looking out for me." I say, knowing that's why he did.

"I'm not going to apologize for that though, I'm still going to look out for you." He says and I smile before he pecks my lips. "Now, get some pants on, we're going to get pizza."

"We're not ordering in?" I ask, whining like a child. "It's cold out there."

"You don't want to drive my car? That's a first." He comments and I instantly smile.

"Get your clothes on." I say, walking out of his embrace and to my messy wardrobe. His rough yet sweet laughter fills my ears, and I smile as I grab a pair of sweatpants from the back of it. I really need to organize this thing.

"Has your music taste changed at all lately?" He asks, sitting down on Matt's bed as he gets his jeans back on.

"I've been listening to the Arctic Monkey's a lot lately; I like them but they're more studying music. The rest has stayed the same though." I nod, looking back to see him smiling at me.

"Good, you have charge of the aux." He tells me, and I smile knowing that he likes my music.

My hair is no longer capable since it screams, I've just had sex, so I don't even attempt to brush it before throwing it up in a messy bun. My daily go-to look after a long day.

"What time is it?" I ask him and he grabs my phone from the bedside table.

"Nine-twenty." He tells me and I hum, it's later than I thought.

"Do you need to still study, we can hang out in the living room after eating, if you want to?" I ask feeling somewhat guilty that he didn't get to have the peace and quiet he originally came to the lounge for.

"Yeah, I mean, I wish I didn't have to study on break but since finals are next month, I really should. So, you really don't mind?" He asks.

"Nope, I'm going to do some tidying up since I do have to. I was going to anyway, honestly." I say and he bursts out laughing, yeah, I didn't believe that either. "Hey, it's not that ridiculous."

"You can't lie, you know. You do this thing with your eyes." He says with a smug grin. I'm aware of this eye thing, people tell me this but they never tell me what exactly my eyes do. How am I supposed to become aware of it, and stop it?

"Ugh, come on, I'm hungry." I say and he stands up as I grab my puffer coat from the coat rack on my door.

"So, you do own a coat?" He asks.

"Yeah, I just liked wearing yours." I admit, remembering the several times I wore his. It smells exactly like him but the more I wore it, the more it smelt like me.

"It smells like Calvin Klein now." He says and I laugh, nodding. Told you.

"What can I say, it's a good coat." I shrug.

"Sure, I'll choose to believe that." He says, putting his arm around my shoulders and I groan, rolling my eyes.

"Shit, I need my keys." I say, and he lifts his arm up, off of me.

"I'll get your bag; you get your shoes on." He says, leaving me here in the living room entrance.

"Thank you!" I yell.

He joins me in the living room, we get our shoes on and we leave. He hands over his keys and we go on our way to get pizza. It's like nothing has changed and the last seven weeks never happened. Only now, we're more. We're no longer just platonic friends, and we're on the same page about things.

Yeah, I kept the incident from him but telling him about it being a thing and it happening is a massive thing for me. No one, not one person but family know what happened. He knows something did, and for now that's enough.

I drive us over to the pizza place, my playlist on loud as he rests his hand on my thigh. It's something I can get used to, but the lock on my heart isn't fully open yet. I'm still terrified of getting hurt, and when I saw him kissing that girl, it hurt me more than it should have. I trust him, but I need to trust him more if I am to open it fully.

After waiting a good fifteen minutes for the pizza to cook, we finally get it and drive back to my apartment. The campus security checking if I'm okay before letting us go. We then make our way back up to my dorm, I get the paper plates out of the cupboard and we make ourselves comfortable on the sofa before I flick on Netflix.

Sex, company and pizza all in one day, I think that's a bonus. I only expected loneliness and lame mac and cheese.

~~~~~

A/N

I've wrote five chapters in the last twenty-four hours... I don't know how but I have. In total I've wrote 13,861 words, and I'm really proud of myself to be honest. The last time I wrote this much was last year, when I first started writing.

It's currently 6AM, and I've been on my laptop since 5PM yesterday, but continuously I've been writing since 10PM. I kind of fucked up my sleeping schedule so I should really get that back on track, but I'm not going to because I have motivation.

Question of the chapter:

Are you a night owl or a morning person?

When I'm in a good schedule, I love being awake through the day because it's when my mental health is better. But I'm most definitely a night owl. I once last 72 hours without sleep because I couldn't sleep at night but would refuse to sleep through the day. I crashed after going on a walk outside, but I only slept 6 hours. Weird, but I can live with hardly any sleep. But I wish to be a morning person.

I hope this chapter was okay.

Thank you for reading! Please comment your thoughts, vote by pressing the little star, and if you want, you can follow me too. Xx

2327 words!

~B