Chapter 9

Darsh's POV:

My mind became a wreck while returning. My imagination ran wild thinking about the possible words of my grandfather. His last words.

Many thoughts fought in my mind thinking about what he might have said where the words can be full of hate or regret or happiness or sorrow. 

Wonder what Maa must be going through. She was shell-shocked when I broke this news to her in the morning and it took her some time to digest the fact and when she did, she broke down. All the old buried memories haunted her and she kept crying but I didn't shed a single tear.

After making sure she was better I left home to meet the lawyer. She must be waiting for me. Vihas is the only person who is not aware of the recent developments as of yet. How would he react? I don't think he remembers him much. 

So much happening today that I took my day off from the hospital. They didn't ask any further questions thinking I must have had a sleepless night. 

With all these thoughts I reached home. Maa must have already heard the car sound and my arrival but I was still inside the car calming my nerves down.

Taking my few minutes I stepped into the home to find Maa standing right in front of the house. She was looking fully worn out with red eyes, ruffled hair, and very anxious. My face fell seeing her state. She was looking helpless and miserable. 

"What happened to you? Have you taken your medicines?" I asked her as I held her shoulders and made her sit on the sofa. I placed the files on the teapoy I went to the cupboard beside the dining table to bring her medicines. It was already 1 past 20 minutes and she cooked lunch and placed all the dishes on the table, but was waiting for me so that we can eat together.  

"What happened there?" she questioned me ignoring the medicines I was giving to her. 

Sighing, I kept them aside and sat beside her. I know she won't rest till she gets to know everything. So I told her all the things that happened there, how grandfather passed away and even grandmother last year, and how he wrote all the properties and assets in our name.

"And here is the letter he wrote," I said holding out the letter and showing it to her. 

"And it states?" 

"I don't know what it has in it."

"Why have you not read it?"

"I was .... I was not sure about what it contained," I replied after a moment of pause. 

 "That I should be worried about, not you." 

Saying so she assured me to open the letter and read it. 

'Darsh,

I am writing this letter in your name with the hope that it will reach you first and that is because you have become the head of the family from a young age. Even I am responsible for that to happen. 

After the completion of the last rites of your father you were waiting for me to bring you back home but I left you there alone. And forever. 

The death of my son blinded both mine and your grandmother's eyes and heart. Even turned us cold-hearted and insensitive to not see from your point of view. We abandoned you, left you to suffer, and even stooped low to make you hate your mother. And we did the same with Vihas and tried to change his mind and hers too. 

Despite failing in our attempts our hatred continued and grew with our age. Our curses kept on growing for you all, especially with your mother. 

But for the last two years, we are dying. Not to oldness but to loneliness. The feeling of not having anyone to call ours was a difficult thing to face and accept. 

Slowly and slowly guilt kept building up and reached a state where we became so ashamed of ourselves. We wanted to approach you and beg your forgiveness but again lack of courage prevented us. 

With all that stress your grandmother passed away and I was aware that my time was near too. But I know I can't leave this world without begging your forgiveness. And with utter shame and disgust ourselves we reached out to you all only after we left this world.

These transfers of money, assets, and properties won't change your mind but I just hope you will remember us once in a while. That itself is enough for us no matter wherever we would be.

To your mother, 

You have come to our home when you were just 20, so young and naive. We have promised your parents that we got a daughter that day and will make sure to keep you happy till eternity. 

But in contrast, we neglected your pain and suffering and broke our promise. And now our karma hit us back in the worst way possible and no matter what we do we can never wash off our sins. 

This life is not enough to atone for our mistakes and we will repent it in further lives as well. Forgive us, daughter. 

From,

A Failed Human being.'

By the time I finished reading the letter my cheekbone became wet with tears and my eyes blur with more tears. 

The small and sweet memories which we shared when I was young came crashing into my mind like waves to the shore. One of the most pleasant and peaceful times in my life but soon everything changed. Wiping my tears I looked at Maa.

Maa was sitting right next to me and read the letter along with me but unlike me, she didn't have any tears. Her previous expression of fear and worry was replaced by an expressionless and straight face. But I know better than to understand just from looking at her face. I am sure even her insides are burning.

"This... letter and all....." I tried to speak out but a huge lump in my throat was making me speechless. All the emotions hit me deeply which I maintained in control since the news broke to me.

"Payoff your and your brother's education loan with the money."

Maa spoke this out of blue. It took me a minute to understand what she meant and nodded in response. 

"Do you forgive them?" I asked her wanting to know what is she feeling. 

"I don't know. All these years I have been a criminal in their eyes and many people's eyes and only I used to beg forgiveness, now suddenly I am made the judge to forgive them. So I don't know what I should do and how I should react. Had there been more abuses for me in it I would've been ok since I am used to it but not to their kind words now."

Talking and talking she finally let out her pain and burst out crying. I held her while she continued to sob and shrink in my arms as though hiding herself. All the old memories are replaying in our minds again and again and making us difficult to live with them. 

Maybe one day or one apology letter is not enough to forgive them and it's not easy to forget either, but someday we may become more kind and brave to look past their mistakes and forgive them.

Hello Everyone.

I am not sure about this chapter. Especially the last few paragraphs.

I tried rewriting again and again and reached this conclusion.

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