TWITTER CHAT
taesty

TAEHYUNG
well hello there Jungkookie

JUNGKOOK
what do you want? 🙄

TAEHYUNG
Alright what got you all pissy this morning?

JUNGKOOK
you calling me Jungkookie???

TAEHYUNG
it's cute!

JUNGKOOK
Did I ask?

JUNGKOOK

TAEHYUNG
Very funny

TAEHYUNG
But I don't need your permission to talk

TAEHYUNG
And because you decided to be pissy, I'll keep calling you Jungkookie 💅

JUNGKOOK
fuck you

TAEHYUNG
you wish I would

JUNGKOOK
Isn't it what you want too? Remember about our deal?

TAEHYUNG
oh, our bet about your degrading kink?

TAEHYUNG
We can test it out real quick

TAEHYUNG
All I need is your consent, a time and a place

JUNGKOOK
well you already have my consent

JUNGKOOK
I'm free all week

JUNGKOOK
and at my place?

TAEHYUNG
Your place? You sure?

JUNGKOOK
yeah

TAEHYUNG
Alright

TAEHYUNG
Sounds like a plan

JUNGKOOK
Mhm

TAEHYUNG
you said you're free all week right?

JUNGKOOK
I did

TAEHYUNG
Does that include today?

—

— Bitch he ain't wasting time 😩

2k retweets 3.9k likes

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kingnamjoon: Taeyong's verse in baby don't like it is so fucking hot don't you think
> jinniethepooh: *creaking bed sounds*

hobisexual: can I join whatever this is? 😩
> kookoonut: the more the
merrier 😉

—

TWITTER CHAT
taesty

JUNGKOOK
sure, let's do this tonight

JUNGKOOK
I'll just send you my address I guess?

TAEHYUNG
sure, doll

@.kookoonut has sent you a location! Click here to save it.

TAEHYUNG
Oh, and don't forget

TAEHYUNG
I'm not going to prep you

TAEHYUNG
so I expect that you are ready by the time I get to your place

TAEHYUNG
if you are not, I don't mind fucking you raw without prepping you

TAEHYUNG
I'm not sure you'll enjoy it, though

JUNGKOOK
Why can't you just prep me like anyone else??

TAEHYUNG
I'll explain that in due time

TAEHYUNG
for now just do as I say, got it?

JUNGKOOK
fine

TAEHYUNG
good boy

—

TWITTER CHAT
*in deep existential crisis*

SEOKJIN
so like this morning I was washing my ass

YOONGI
worst story beginning ever

TAEHYUNG
can't disagree with that

SEOKJIN
and then suddenly

SEOKJIN
I get a call from my phone operator

SEOKJIN
saying that I used up all my 4g and now I have to pay them 40$ more

SEOKJIN
but like I'm broke and trust me, dollars don't come out of asses, even if they're clean

NAMJOON
that wasn't necessary

JUNGKOOK
That'd be lit tho

HOSEOK
so what, the guy with the cleanest asshole would be the richest??

JIMIN
CAN WE NOT TALK ABOUT THIS PLEASE

JUNGKOOK
well hello to you too Jimin

JIMIN
YOU SHUT UP

JIMIN
I'm mad at you

JUNGKOOK
I- for what?

JIMIN
Hold up a minute, ATEEZ is playing I can't be bothered to be angry at your rn

JIMIN
I'll be back when I'm done vibing

JUNGKOOK
Alright???

SEOKJIN
moving on...

SEOKJIN
So since I'm broke, I decided I'd get a sugar daddy

NAMJOON

JUNGKOOK
I wish taehyung was my sugar daddy

YOONGI
I wish Jimin was my sugar daddy but he's the one spending MY money on other men 🚶🏻

JIMIN
at least I got the daddy part

NAMJOON
don't y'all switch?

JIMIN
we do but he always ends up asking me to fuck him so is he even a switch at this point?

JEONGGUK
maybe he really likes your dick up his ass rather than just hanging there

JIMIN
... ew

SEOKJIN
That was a little too blunt

SEOKJIN
but we stan

YOONGI
I don't disagree with his statement

YOONGI
but I don't want this annoying fucker to think he's right so

YOONGI
Wtf are you talking about
mate 🙄

SEOKJIN
Don't be insecure Yoongi

SEOKJIN
being a bottom is great!

JUNGKOOK
right? You get to lie there and do nothing but still get pleasure

HOSEOK
starfishes in bed should go to hell

JUNGKOOK
we're all going to hell anyways so might as well have a bit of fun in the meantime

NAMJOON
excuse you? I'm not going anywhere

NAMJOON
I'm an atheist

JUNGKOOK
still going somewhere

NAMJOON
Or not

NAMJOON
what if I'm immortal?

JUNGKOOK
want me to test your theory
out? 😍

TAEHYUNG
oh-

NAMJOON
no man I'm fine, really

JUNGKOOK
your loss 😔 dying is sexy

SEOKJIN
My libido since I started dating Namjoon is dying and it's not sexy trust me-

YOONGI
JSBCJSKS THAT WAS SO MEAN AND FOR WHAT?

SEOKJIN
he wears socks during sex!

JUNGKOOK
I heard socks can make female orgasms last longer

JUNGKOOK
maybe he's trying to do himself a favor 🙄

SEOKJIN
HES NOT A FEMALE

SEOKJIN
HES A MAN

SEOKJIN
WITH A DICK

SEOKJIN
that doesn't make mine hard anymore 😔

JIMIN
sad times

JIMIN
My dick can't relate

JUNGKOOK
mine either

TAEHYUNG
I'd say mine either but Jungkook doesn't even need that to get hard

JUNGKOOK
I SWEAR TO GOD

HOSEOK
Don't drag God in your sex life please-

JUNGKOOK
right, sorry

JUNGKOOK
Anyways, I was reading something last night

JUNGKOOK
It was an article about sex

YOONGI
how surprising

JUNGKOOK
right?

TAEHYUNG
💀

JUNGKOOK
but it was really interesting

JUNGKOOK
apparently, the top thrusts 100 to 500 times during a sex session

JUNGKOOK
That's like doing 500 push-ups!

JUNGKOOK
even I can't do that

TAEHYUNG
I guess I'm stronger than you
then 😎

JUNGKOOK
we should check

TAEHYUNG
are you suggesting you want to top me?

JUNGKOOK
ew no thanks

JUNGKOOK
I bet your ass is nasty

JUNGKOOK
full of germs and shit

NAMJOON
OMG CAN YOU SHUT UP

NAMJOON
THIS IS DISGUSTING

TAEHYUNG
FYI, I do wash my ass

JUNGKOOK
wow congrats, do you want an Oscar for that? A Grammy perhaps?

JUNGKOOK
everyone washes their ass Taehyung... It's like, basic hygiene

JUNGKOOK
but only bottoms and real clean people hydrate it and massage it regularly to make sure it stays all nice and firm

TAEHYUNG
Are you implying that my ass isn't nice?

JUNGKOOK
I don't know, wanna show it me so I can tell you?

JIMIN
what kind of conversation are we having..?

TAEHYUNG
I don't know but it's making me loose brain cells

JUNGKOOK
oh come on...

JUNGKOOK
it's not like you had a lot of those to begin with anyways

TAEHYUNG
fuck you

NAMJOON
try dating Seokjin, you'll see how many brain cells you can loose per day

SEOKJIN
RUDE

SEOKJIN
😔🔫

TAEHYUNG
you forgot the broken heart emoji

SEOKJIN
right, silly me!

SEOKJIN
💔😔🔫

TAEHYUNG
that's better

NAMJOON
I'm sorry, baby

NAMJOON
don't be sad okay? I'll ( try to ) make you breakfast!

HOSEOK
it's noon?

NAMJOON
That's ✨ irrelevant ✨

NAMJOON
so do you want breakfast?

SEOKJIN
yes 🥺

NAMJOON
Then go make it yourself you lazy fuck

SEOKJIN
that brat-

—

IMESSAGE CHAT
unknown number

UNKNOWN
Well well well...

UNKNOWN
Look what we have here

UNKNOWN
another bullshit apology for not being able to pay me back

UNKNOWN
isn't that original?

JUNGKOOK
I'm sorry

JUNGKOOK
I'll pay you back next week I promise

UNKNOWN
You already said that last week, Jeon

UNKNOWN
and the week before that

UNKNOWN
I'm done

JUNGKOOK
Han please

UNKNOWN
uh-huh

UNKNOWN
you don't get to say please no more, Jungkook

UNKNOWN
I want that money tomorrow at 10pm sharp

UNKNOWN
And trust me you don't want to know what happens if you are not at our usual spot at that time

JUNGKOOK
I'll be there

UNKNOWN
with the money?

JUNGKOOK
with the money

UNKNOWN
good

UNKNOWN
I've been nice and patient with you for a very long time, Jungkook

UNKNOWN
But if you keep provoking me I can't give you this special treatment

JUNGKOOK
I understand

JUNGKOOK
I'm sorry

UNKNOWN
I don't give a shit about your lame apologies

UNKNOWN
Just be there with the money tomorrow okay?

JUNGKOOK
I will, Han

UNKNOWN
you better
Seen

—

— I actually can't believe I let him top me. Like, he's such a bottom?

2.1k retweets 5.5k likes

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jinniethepooh: me when Namjoon is being cute

hobisexual: are we not going to talk about how perfect he is?

taesty: Looking like this should be ILLEGAL
> peachiichim: right? And those lips omg 😩

yoongay: I can still top you! :(

—

— I can't believe I actually let him top me. Like, he's such a bottom?

3.4k retweets 6.7k likes

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yoongay: nvm he's a whole daddy I want him to fuck me in the ass
> jinniethepooh: honestly mood
> taesty: honestly I didn't need to know that

kookoonut: can you believe that sexy mf right here is my bestie?

kingnamjoon: The eye makeup makes him so much hotter than he already is, it's unfair
> peachiichim: want me to teach you?

—

TWITTER CHAT
taesty

JUNGKOOK
okay so there's a slight change of plan for tonight

TAEHYUNG
oh?

TAEHYUNG
having second thoughts already, doll?

JUNGKOOK
no!

JUNGKOOK
no, of course not

JUNGKOOK
It's just, we can't do it at my place

TAEHYUNG
Why not?

JUNGKOOK
Because of something along the lines of 'none of your business'

TAEHYUNG
I should've seen it coming

JUNGKOOK
anyways, I still want to do it

JUNGKOOK
and I don't want to wait

JUNGKOOK
so here's what I propose

JUNGKOOK
come visit me at my work place?

TAEHYUNG
your... work place?

TAEHYUNG
aren't you a waiter?

JUNGKOOK
not really, no

TAEHYUNG
...what do you do then?

JUNGKOOK
you'll find out soon enough

TAEHYUNG
are you sure the place where you work is suitable for such activities at least?

JUNGKOOK
oh trust me it's the most suitable place ever

TAEHYUNG
...

TAEHYUNG
you don't work as a prostitute, right?

JUNGKOOK
nope

TAEHYUNG
mhm

TAEHYUNG
alright then, your work place it is

TAEHYUNG
send me the address again, pretty boy

JUNGKOOK
I'm on it

kookoonut has sent you a location! Click here to save it.

TAEHYUNG
perfect

TAEHYUNG
I'll be there at 7pm sharp, and I want you to be ready by this time

TAEHYUNG
Is it clear?

JUNGKOOK
Clearer than glass

TAEHYUNG
good

TAEHYUNG
I seriously hope you are worth my time, Jungkook

JUNGKOOK
I can guarantee that 🥰

JUNGKOOK
I'm pretty awesome at sex and I'm also a wonderful company

TAEHYUNG
I'll believe it when I'll see it

TAEHYUNG
now what are you waiting for?

TAEHYUNG
go get ready

JUNGKOOK
right

JUNGKOOK
see you later I guess?

TAEHYUNG
later

*****

"Kookoonut has sent you a location! Click here to save it.'"Taehyung read out loud. He clicked on the here and a new tab opened, with a very unfamiliar place displayed on the screen.

"A strip club, huh?" Taehyung chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief at the thought of Jungkook in stripping attire. He poked his tongue out and ran the expanse of it over his dry lips, his eyes twinkling in amusement.

"Well, well, well... aren't you full of surprises, doll?"