A/N

So This is the longest chapter in this book so far, I just feel like things need to happen now. I hope you will like this chapter!

Cira's POV

I decided to text Jade when I got home. Just to apologize for what happened. Although, I don't feel like it. She and my other friends are all part of this, of the reason I feel like this. They also keep things from me.

The rest of the week my mom has to work a lot, she comes home really late so decided to let Celly sleep by our grandparents. Grace and I can take care of him but I know my mom thinks we need time for ourselves.

Since I have been back Grace is very silent end distant. My mother also acts weird but it's different with Grace, she is really having a hard time.

I keep on attending school as I should, leaving my earphones home. When I get home I go to my room to listen to music, I just sit like that till we're gonna eat.

Saturday night is decide to go to the gas station to buy my favorite vanilla cookies. It's half past 9 and pretty dark and cold outside. I'm wearing sweatpants and a big vest to keep me warm.

The bell rings when I enter the store. There are 2 other people here, that are 2 more than normal. I walk over to the aisle where my cookies normally are. Standing in front of the rack I grab 2 packages of cookies. When I look up I see a girl standing in front of me looking a the other side of the shelf. When I'm about to turn around the girl looks up and smiles friendly before looking past me. She has kinda a sad look in her eyes. This is a small town so it is weird that I haven't seen her before. I turn around to go to the cash desk.

I take out my earphones when I stand in front of the old lady smoking a cigarette. Her hair looks dirty and is pulled back in a bun. Her dark eye make-up spread out over her eyes like a thick past and her red lipstick is on her teeth and not on her lips anymore.

I also grab a chocolate bar and put everything on the counter.

''That's it?'' she asks while blowing the smoke my way.

I nod and grab my money.

''4,50'' she holds out her hand and I see her dirty long nails. Before I can hand them to her she grabs them ruffly out of my hand. She throws the coins in her desk without counting them and slams the drawer close.

In the mirror above the counter, I see the boy, who is now standing next to the girl, looking this way. He keeps his eyes on what is happening. I know the woman is being a bit rude but I don't have the energy to react to it. The boy and the girl look kinda similar. They are both beautiful and have the same skin color and hair color also the same nose.

The woman throws my cookies and the chocolate bar in and bag and shoves it my way, I catch it before it falls off the counter.

''Thank you,'' I say before putting my earphones back in and walking out of the store.

It's even darker now, I put on my hood and start walking. There are just a couple of cars driving by and that it, no one is walking outside. When my song ended I grab my phone to put on another one.

A weird sound from behind me gets my attention. It's the sound of an engine running. I look around to see a black BMW with the light off a couple of feet behind me riding slow.

OK... that's kinda weird.

I turn my music back on and walk on. When I'm about to turn the corner into my street I see the black car turning away.

When I'm home I go up to my rooms and sit in my window seat looking at the moon while eating my vanilla cookies.

Since my accident, I have been so fascinated by the moon. There is just something magical about it. Staring at it makes me feel less alone.

At the weekend everyone went to Christina's. I said that I have lots of homework so I couldn't make it. I do have a lot of homework but not planning on making it.

My mom asked me to find a photo of Celly for Luuk his friend's book. On the second floor is my mother's office. She always keeps our school pictures in the drawer under her desk. The big eyes of my bother are the first thing I see when I open the drawer. He is a cute kid with his chubby cheeks and cute hair.

I look around me, there must be scissors somewhere here.

Nope, no scissors here.

Grace must have scissors. Her desk is always neat and she has everything you could need for school. I walk down the stairs again and feel stitches in my foot. I didn't take my medication yesterday and today because I hoped I wouldn't need them anymore, but apparently that's not the case.

I open the door and stop moving.

What the hell happened here!

Her curtains are closed her bed is not made and I can't even see her floor. It's covered with cloths and pillows and just...just a mess. I dodge all the clothes and books and just walk her desk. There are books, magazines and makeup. All her pencils, pens, erasers and post-its are all over the place. She normally has arranged it very neatly.

I push a few things to one side and look for scissors, but can't find one. I open the top drawer that is full of notebooks. The drawer underneath is full off pictures. I open the drawer further and see a pair of scissors.

Found it!

I want to close the drawer again until I see a photo where someone's head is scratched through. It is a boy standing beside Grace, laurel, and Ian. I open the drawer further and see that there are more of those. I take the photos out and sit down the desk chair. Each of the photos his face had been scratched through with a red marker or he had been cut off the photo or an ex trough his face.

Who is he? And why would Grace be so angry with him? They looked pretty close in these pictures. They were in school together because There is a picture of graduation. There are even some pics of them here at our house. How come I don't know him?

The front door opens. I quickly put everything back in place, cut out the photo of Celly and get out of her room.

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My alarm goes off 3 times before I get up. I got in a fight last night with my mother and sister. They were talking about something, a funeral. When I entered the room I saw Grace crying. I asked what happened but they changed the subject.

Later on, when my mother was making tea I saw she got a message.

Jack:
How is Cira doing? And you and Grace?

When I asked my mother about it she said he is a colleague.

She was laying, but yeah that fine, everyone does it.

I stand in front of the mirror in our school restroom. The girl I'm seeing looks bad. Pill skin, dark eyes, messy hair, clothes that are way too big.

When I leave the restroom I notice it empty here. The bell has probably gone already. When I enter my classroom I see that everyone is already there and looking up at me.

''Cira, you're late, again.'' Miss Lisse says.

I turn around to look at her. I'm already in the back of the classroom ready to sit down.

''Okay, go ahead, sit down,'' she says reluctantly.

I sit down and open my book on the same page Jade has.

Stuff needs to happen now, this is my third week of school. I need to feel like my old self again I'm getting sick of this.

I see a moon on my paper and keep on drawing.

''Cira,'' I hear miss. Lissa calls out.

I look up to meet her eyes.

"What is the auxiliary verb or linking verb in this sense?" I look at the board. I haven't really studied this part so I don't get it.

"No idea," I say and continue drawing again.

"Try it," She looks stern.

She doesn't like me, I know she doesn't.

I read the sentence again.

"I really don't know."

Mrs Lisse looks irritated ''Cira you will get nowhere with this attitude."

Wat the hell is her problem, I just don't know/ I look at her and without thinking I say:

"Are you kidding me? Nobody cares about this. Auxiliary verb and linking verb. As if I would need this later in my life. Someone will probably come up to me in the streets and ask me: what is the auxiliary verb in that sentencf?" I spit the word at her and feel my heartbeat against my chest.

Her face is completely red. "I'm so done with you! Out!" she screams and points at the door.

I pack my things and walk out, slamming the door behind me. I sit down at the window I sat at last time.

That woman really drives me crazy. She doesn't leave me alone, I didn't bother her this time. She wouldn't have reacted that way if another student said they didn't know. I don't feel guilty this time, she asked for it.

I pull my legs to my chest and stare out of the window.

It felt good to say what I was thinking. I have been angry for too long now. I need to move on and leave it behind me. No one cares about how I feel, if they did they would have talked to me and told me the things I need to know.

I need to move on and get back to my old self. Getting send out of class is nothing for me.

I lean my head on my knees. I need to get rid of the annoying, angry, nervous, anxious feeling.

''Are you okay,'' A voice says a little unsure.

That sound makes my head pop up even tho I'm not sure if he was talking to me.

When I look up I see those, green-brown eyes staring at me. He stands a little too far away to be talking to someone. I'm a little surprised he talking to me that I forget to answer.

''Yes,'' I answer.

He nods and pushes his hands in his pockets.

He scans my face for a little too long before he asks, ''What happened?''

Does he remember me? Is that way he is talking to me?

He waits for my answer like he cares about what I'm gonna say. I breathe in and out before answering.

''I got kicked out,'' I explain.

I see a smile appear on his face as I shamelessly keep staring at him.

He probably thinks I'm some drama queen for reacting this way.

I smile to myself and look away

A/N

What do you think about the 2 people in the gas station store?

And about the pictures?

And what about the boy with those green-brown eyes?