Daniel and Belinda arrived and waited until the officers had taken swabs and photos of my bruises. As soon as I walked into the waiting room, wrapped in the blanket, they fired question after question at me.

I sat on the bench and covered my ears.

Stacey yelled at them, "Can you two stop it? She's already had a couple of big shocks tonight! She's okay, not hurt, but we're sure shock will cause problems tomorrow. For now, she needs a hot bath and plenty of sleep. There'll be time for questions when she's had those things. So do her a favour and take care of her."

Belinda sat beside me and put her arm around me. Daniel rubbed his hands through his hair. "Yeah...sorry, it's just...shit she looks a mess. She's my sister. If someone's hurt her, I'll, I'll..."

"You'll do nothing, we're handling it. Take her home and put her to bed."

We went to Belinda's. After I had a long, hot shower, I curled up in her bed. I expected Belinda to lie beside me, but instead, Daniel put his arms around me. I bawled my eyes out. He didn't say anything. I remember him playing with my hair and thinking he was the best big brother a girl could have.

When I woke, they were both sitting on the couch, drinking coffee and staring at me. I smiled. They smiled back at me. The first thing I said was, "Adam loves me."

They burst out laughing.

"He's an undercover cop!" I said.

Daniel choked on his coffee. Belinda spilt hers on her leg and jerked backwards. They both stared at me without saying anything.

"Don't you see?" I gasped. "That's why he always came and went? I never understood what was going on with him. He couldn't tell me because he's been undercover for two years pretending to be part of that bikie gang. They did it last night. The big bust or raid or whatever you call it. The bad guy found out about me and took me there to hurt me. To hurt Adam, but Adam saved me, and the whole thing is over now. I can't go to my unit because Ryan knows where I live. They were going to rape me. I peed my pants. Adam hit Brock, and then he told me to stay where I was. I fell asleep and then woke to the sounds of yelling and guns. Brock held a gun to my head. I didn't want to die. Then there was a loud band, and blood went everywhere. I was sure I was dead, but it wasn't me, it was Brock. He was dead. They shot him, not me. Adam loves me...don't you see?"

Their faces blurred. I guessed I was babbling. Something deep inside told me I was talking too much, but I couldn't stop. Words kept tumbling out of my mouth until Daniel cradled me. A blanket was wrapped around me, and Belinda put a tablet in my mouth. She made me drink some water to swallow it. I don't remember falling asleep. It was dark when I woke. The glow of the TV was the only light in the room.

As I rolled over to look around, Daniel put his arm over me. "Hey, how do you feel?"

I cried again. God...I was so sick of crying, but I had no control. Daniel continued to hold me.

When I was settled, Belinda brought me some toast and a cup of tea with sugar in it. I laughed when I tasted it, but didn't argue with her. She sat beside me, patted my leg, smiled and said, "So when's the wedding, girlie?"

I choked on my toast and laughed. It felt so good to laugh. Once I started, it escalated, and I found I couldn't stop.

Belinda put another tablet on my tongue and made me drink the tea.

I faded into peace and heard Daniel say, "How long did the doctor say this might go on for?"

I didn't hear Belinda's answer. As darkness claimed me, the warm glow of being loved surrounded me.

Daniel was sitting on the couch, staring warily at me when I woke. "Hey."

"Hey," I replied timidly, smiling because I knew I had been weird. "I'm okay now. I'm not going to cry."

He laughed and said, "Thank fuck for that. You know I'm not good with crying, and Belinda's had to go to work."

I fiddled with my fingers and queried, "Did I explain it all? Could you work it out because I know I was babbling?"

"The police have been a couple of times and the doctor, on Adam's say so." Daniel shook his head and grinned. "Who'd have thought the wanker was a cop...undercover...brave man. I wouldn't want to do what he's been doing for the last two years. Living his whole life as a lie. Can you imagine doing that?" He laughed and added, "And I hit the prick."

"Has he been?" I asked wide-eyed.

"No...can't. That's what Detective Kaye said. He's got to carry out the charade for a bit longer until they know who's on remand and who's on bail. A safety thing." Daniel paused and then continued, "Jazz, they've moved you out of the unit. Belinda went and got some of your clothes and stuff." He shook his head in a confused manner. "They said something about someone knowing where you live. They've taken your stuff to a place near Creswick. I don't know what that's about, but I'm supposed to take you at the weekend. They said you know where to go and that we have to meet Wally for the key."

I spluttered with laughter. Panic spread across Daniel's face. I held up my hand and shook my head, saying, "It's okay. Sorry. I'm not freaking out." I settled myself and said, "Adam took me there. It belongs to a friend of his. A weekender. It's a small farm. I'm sure Adam must have told them to send my stuff there." I paused and said, "I hope his friends don't mind, but it'll be safe for me there. Did they say when Adam would be finished with it and be able to come home?"

"No," Daniel shook his head. "I guess they don't know. It depends on the courts."

I had to go and see the doctor for a check-up. He told me my hysterics were normal. I should expect a few more outbursts, but eventually I should be fine. He suggested I get an appointment with a psychiatrist, but I'll only do that if I get worse.

Detective Kaye couldn't tell me when Adam would be able to come home. He said they had gaoled him with some of the gang members, so it looked authentic. They wanted to process the people who had been arrested to determine how safe it was for Adam and the others. They want to keep everything as hush, hush as possible until the court cases to protect each undercover officer for as long as possible.

My heart sank. Adam would have to hide out for the rest of his life. I remembered him asking me how I would feel if I had to move to another state because of my husband's work commitments.

I hope Jasmine isn't suffering from PTSD.

I couldn't do Adam's job, could you?

Photo copyright - Alamy