Garrett

I wasn't sure how long I'd been standing in the hospital doorway. The moment I saw Iris still and sleeping, I'd frozen. Rage knotted my stomach and pulled my skin tight. I almost couldn't look at her. In that hospital bed, she looked small and fragile. That alone stoked the anger in me. If the lights were on, I could see every bruise on her beautiful body. God, I was so thankful the cops arrived when they did or else I'd have killed the man. Just thinking about what that would have done to my mother was enough to take the edge off.

I clenched my teeth together, drew in a long, slow breath through my nose, and exhaled until there was no air in my lungs. Over and over I did that until I was no longer on the verge of finding Paul's hospital room and putting him on life support.

Iris' friend Minh had called me earlier to update me on her condition. When she'd woken up, she'd been in a lot of pain, though she wouldn't actually admit it. She told Minh and Ivy what happened, and they stayed with her until she could barely keep her eyes open. I sensed there were some things Minh left unsaid, and I wondered how much she knew. Probably everything.

Perhaps it would be best for me to come back tomorrow. With her injuries, she would be on high doses of pain medication to stay comfortable. Then there was the mental exhaustion. I didn't need to add to that with my need to hear her side of the story from her own lips.

Mind made up, I turned to leave, bumping my arm against a cart in the hallway. The cups on it rattled, and Iris jolted awake. She felt around her bed until she found her phone. Swiping up, the screen's glow lit up her face, drawing my attention to her wide eyes and parted lips. Realizing she didn't know who I was, I flipped on the light in the hallway.

She lowered the phone slowly. "Garrett."

The sound of her voice cut through my anger, and my knees nearly buckled with relief.

"Hi, Iris." There was no turning back now. No beating around the bush. "We need to talk."

"I know we do. But please, let me say this first." Her shoulders curved around her ears. "I am so very sorry for hurting you. That was never my intention."

I drew a chair up to her bedside. She turned on the lamp next to her bed, and I sucked in a sharp breath. Her bottom lip had doubled in size, and her left eyelid had swollen shut. The one visible brown eye glittered with tears as she waited for me to speak.

"I'm going to kill him," I growled, muscles bunching in my legs as I stood.

Iris grabbed my hand and pulled me down. "He's never going to touch me again. Maybe it's just me, but I find it a sweeter revenge knowing he's going to rot in prison for the rest of his life."

Threading my fingers through hers, I raised them to my lips, possessed by the sudden need to touch her. Right now, none of the lies mattered. I just needed this reassurance that she was okay.

"This should never have happened."

"It's my fault—"

"Don't you fucking say it," I snapped, cutting her off. "You didn't do a damn thing to deserve this."

"I'm not saying I deserve it."

She coughed and cleared her throat with a wince. I grabbed her water and handed it to her, watching her closely as she pushed the straw through her injured mouth. Her hands shook slightly as she passed the cup back to me.

"I'm not saying I deserved it," she began again, her fingers picking at lint on her blanket as she stared into the distance. "But if I hadn't swapped places with Ivy, this wouldn't have happened."

"If you hadn't swapped placed with Ivy..." The words came out rushed and brittle. Iris tensed, waiting for the rest of the damning sentence. Instead, I shocked us both by saying, "I might not be in love with you."

It wasn't the first time I'd admitted this to her, but as I held my breath, waiting anxiously for her response, I accepted the fact that even after everything, I really did still love her.

She sniffed and shook her head. "You can't love me. You don't even know me."

"That's where you're wrong." I lowered my head, so she had to look at me. "I've worked with Ivy every day for years, and not once did she ever cross my mind in any capacity other than work. Until the day you showed up pretending to be her. You might have changed your hair and your clothes, but that was it. It was still you I wanted, Iris."

"You mean that?"

"I do. I'm still so pissed about the deception, but I think I understand. You ended up in a pretty impossible situation. But..." I rubbed my chin. Bristles poked my fingers, and suddenly, I felt so very tired. "Tell me you didn't use me just to write your book."

"What?" She shook her head and squeezed my hand. "No! I mean...not in that way. It's hard to explain."

A muscle ticked in my jaw. "It shouldn't be. Did you decide to fuck me so you could put it in the book?"

Iris sank back into her pillows. Her dark hair fell around her pale face in lank strands. She was quiet for a long moment, but just when I suspected she had fallen asleep, she spoke.

"I am...was...a virgin until you."

"Lexi told me." That was another bone to pick later.

"That's part of why I agreed to swap places with Ivy. My publishers wanted more spice in my book, and since I didn't have any experience, my spice was lukewarm. I thought maybe if I pretended to be Ivy long enough, I might be brave enough to finally sleep with someone."

My heart threatened to break. "So the answer is yes."

"No, it's not. Yes, I was going to try to sleep with someone to get experience, but I couldn't go through with it. I slept with you because I had never wanted someone that way before. It wasn't about the book at all, but..." She sighed. "I am a writer, and the morning after our first time together, I woke up feeling inspired. It never crossed my mind that you would read those chapters and be able to spot the similarities."

"Of course I would spot them. Every moment we've had together—every touch—it's burned into my brain."

"I really am sorry, and I've already sent an email to my editor stating that I will rewrite those chapters."

"You don't have to do that."

"I do. I want to prove to you I wasn't using you, and that I...I love you."

She whispered the last three words, but they exploded in my head like fireworks. My heart swelled, and if she hadn't been injured, I might have dragged her out of the bed. But behind the initial joy, a whisper of caution followed.

"Keep the chapters." I kissed her forehead, lingering longer than necessary, and stood. "Goodnight, Iris."

Then I left. With no clue what to do next.