****107:

They went to a coffee shop down by the pier and sat in a booth. It was very dark out and fog had rolled in off the ocean. There were fishermen out on the pier, a few other early morning people, watching the night.

A waitress brought them coffee and hot chocolate. Tracy spooned the whipped cream off the top of hers and handed the spoon to Jimmy with a raised eyebrow.

"Sure." Jimmy took it from her and ate the whole thing and she laughed.

"So, what have you boys been up to since I've been out of commission?" she asked, leaning on her elbows companionably.

Jimmy took a drink of his coffee and leaned on his elbows as well. "We been working with Jena James pretty steady, she's getting ready to go on the road, we might go with her."

Greg had sat beside Tracy. He shook his spiked head at his brother warningly. "But not if you need us." He assured.

Tracy turned to him with a frown. "You're not tied to me that way, guys. If an opportunity arises, you have to take it, this is business, you can't afford to just hang around waiting for me to...."

But Greg leaned into her, just for a second, feeling close and protective obviously, and Tracy let him, feeling a mixture of confusion and anticipation. Jimmy eyed them speculatively.

"So, did you feel the music tonight?" he asked, deciding to ignore his brother's close proximity. It wasn't his call if Greg suddenly wanted to pursue Tracy McCaffrey Maverick. He thought it might be foolish, as she was in a lot of pain from her loss, and she came with more baggage than any twenty-year-old he was aware of.

Tracy bowed her head staring into her chocolate and rotated her neck a bit. "Not really." She stated calmly. "I heard some music, good music, stuff with a lot of potential, that made me want to write lyrics to it, and play it again, set it down, even, add to it, yeah, but inside...." She shook her head.

"Well, do you have to hear it inside to make a hit song?" Jimmy persisted.

A shrug. "Nope." She laughed and cast a sidelong look at Greg who was nodding at her encouragingly. "Many times I've written songs that became hits that weren't first in my head, and many times the stuff in my head never got written."

"It's just something you like to feel and hear, in order to feel inspired, right?" Greg questioned.

"It's a part of me, yeah."

"Well, it'll come back eh?" Jimmy reiterated with a laugh. "So, how about those kids? How's it going being a mommy?"

Tracy looked up and her smile was actually enthusiastic. "Danny is awesome, he's so into trucks and cars right now, his room's set up with a race track and he plays with it night and day. He's really smart too, he can draw whole pictures by himself, not even in a coloring book."

] Greg gave Jimmy a meaningful stare. But Tracy went on. "And the twins... well, Melia is starting to roll over when she hears people around her. She likes to sit in her baby seat mostly, up on a table or something where she can see, she hates the swing. But Meg... she would rather be on the ground on her back playing with stuff, she cries more, for no reason, and she's hungrier. They're a lot of fun, really."

They drank in silence for a few minutes, hearing the waves outside, the calls of gulls, the clang of buckets and other fishing paraphernalia. Then Jimmy got up. "So, are we done for the night? I might get back and see what Carmen is up to." Carmen was his girlfriend. Tracy waited for Greg to stand up and let her out, she was aware of his hand on the small of her back helping her.

"Yeah, I'm not going back inside to play. I'm going to surf in a couple of hours, I might try and sleep a little." She announced and Jimmy gave her a quick hug before giving his brother another meaningful stare, trying to ascertain if he was coming as well, but Greg shook his head slightly.

Jimmy sauntered off and Tracy went outside and stood against the railing staring out into the mist. Lights from the pier left an eerie glow directly around them like halos. She couldn't say how many times in her life she'd stood just this way, leaning against the railing of the pier, listening...

She hugged her jacket to her and felt the salt spray touch her hair and leave it dew sparkled. Greg had come to stand very close next to her, he leaned against the railing as well. She glanced at him.

"You don't have to hang around if you've got somewhere to go. I can get home by myself, it's only a couple of blocks." She told him evenly in case he was just being protective. She didn't really want anyone to be too clingy or protective right now. It reeked of control, and she desperately did not want to be spied upon or controlled.

"Did you want to be alone?" his deep voice came in her ear.

Tracy shook her head, and didn't look at him. "No, not necessarily. I just don't want to keep you."

"Then I thought I'd just spend a little time with you, that's all." He said and his grin was mischievous as well as flirty. It reminded her forcefully of the way Raine's first moves had been. A trifle pushy, bold, taking her for an airplane ride that first night, coming to get her the next in LA, flying out to Catalina... the insulating feel of wind and dark.

She didn't feel obligated to entertain right now, though, she felt too empty inside to do that. She had to focus on being a good mother, and getting back to work and a routine. She had to be in charge of her life, or someone else would. She had liked the freedom of being married to Raine, they were partners....

"How are things going at home?" he asked.

Tracy shrugged. "Good."

"Yeah, it's been really boring around here without you. I kind of liked flying out to Idaho or Utah or wherever to record smash bang disks in one night."

Tracy laughed. "Yeah, those were the whirlwind days."

"When you could hear the music?"

She nodded. "I couldn't get enough of it, and I had to download it right away."

"It was incredible." He laughed. "All-nighters, just laying down song after song, with very little adjustments."

"I guess there was a ton of music coming out of me then. You too, what do you think about that new one tonight?"

Greg chuckled in a self-deprecating way. "Right. It might be good now that you are fixing it, but I've been working on it for months. Nothing like you writing and laying down hit after hit in seconds flat."

"It wasn't seconds flat, and I had Michael, you forget, to fix them up for me."

"We have a backlog of about thirty songs that need touch ups before recording, you want to work on any of those tomorrow?"

She nodded firmly and turned to lean with her back against the railing. Her long hair fell against the wet steel and she shook it and little droplets came off it like a dog. She laughed and smoothed it, her hand came away wet. Greg ran his hand over it casually as well, smoothing water off it and looking at it as if seeing it for the first time. Tracy's eyes met his and before he could say something about her hair or anything else, she turned away.

"Is it too hard being out with me?" he asked her gently.

Tracy shook her head in tiny denials. "No. Just a lot of memories."

"Of music?"

"No, of... of Raine... and Casey. It's the pier. This is home for me, but it also gives me a lot of memories." She felt a throat choking stiffness in her demeanor and hugged her coat even closer.

Greg drew in his breath sharply. He stared out at the light halos and nodded agreement with her even if she wasn't looking. He didn't know what to say, he'd held her while she cried last night and would again. Her grief was such a tangible thing.

"It's been awhile since we were out together." He began, wanting to bring up happier memories, and they had a catalog of them. "Remember in Rexburg, throwing water balloons at the kids coming out of the dance?"

She chuckled. "We hid behind that sign. Everybody hides there now. Did you know it's illegal to throw water balloons in the city of Rexburg, now?"

"How about that time I tackled you playing ultimate Frisbee? 'Bout knocked the wind out of you."

"You did knock the wind out of me, crazy! You're a big guy, if you haven't noticed I'm just a little squirt! You about clobbered me."

"I can't help it if I'm competitive."

"Fanatical is more like it!"

"Oh, don't deny you can jump like a kangaroo, either. I was flying first, but you were in the air when I came down."

"And you didn't bother to break the fall any!"

"I couldn't! I had to throw that Frisbee!" he laughed and laughed, and liked it that she was giggling too. Those were better memories, he thought, keep those coming. But he'd seen her eyes.... The sudden opaque stare and way the corners squeezed shut just a little. Another memory....

He turned her with one cold hand. "It's gonna take time."

She wouldn't look at him, and he appreciated her struggle to hold in her grief. They started walking back the way they had come and down the boardwalk toward the coffee shop, up a block and into the gated community. When Greg unlocked the latch and allowed her to duck under his arm, Tracy turned and looked up into his face.

"I'm glad... glad you took me to the pier tonight. We- we should do it again." She hurriedly turned and walked away very fast toward her condo.

*****