Thoughts of you

He was surrounded by his brothers, in an awkward yet sweet hug the last time she saw him. The family she had seen in the Oberoi mansion had their own share of dysfunctionalities, but that did not stop them from loving each other, or her from craving a love like that.   was never a part of a large family, it had always been she and her Ma; her father only a distant memory and her uncle and aunt a living nightmare. And she understood why he wanted to protect them, in the little time she had spent with them, her feelings towards them had been similar. But perhaps the time to leave them forever was nearing. Gauri sighed, sitting down in the luxurious waiting room of the hospital's VIP section, contemplating the last look he had given her. 

He had caught her eye over the entangled limbs and heads of his two brothers still bear hugging him. His eyes did not have that bitter loathing she was used to or the tender love she dreamed of; they were simply curious; as if he was raking his brains trying to recall her, or trying to place her  somewhere in his incomplete memories. Perhaps she had never meant anything in his life at all, that he had forgotten her so easily.

Tears pricked her eyes as the door opened and someone walked in, seeing it was Shivay and he was looking straight at her, Gauri tried to wipe her eyes secretly. Shivay sat down beside her heavily, not commenting on her tears. In the past three months they have grown a deep mutual understanding; a bond with had flavors of both brotherly affection and friendly concern. She had seen him breakdown after Annika Bhabhi had left, had sat by his side in the study facing the pool one entire night not speaking a word and listening as he poured his heart out. He had held her back as she lashed out at the doctors who said Omkara cannot be cured, had  gently dragged her down to the kitchens and made her drink a tall glass of hot chocolate along with Rudra who was certain O was pulling their leg. In those three months they had become her brothers as much as his, she had become Ri from Gauri Bhabhi and she knew Shivay could read her silences well enough.

"He has partial amnesia, Shivay opened the conversation flatly. "The doctor says we're not to force him into remembering anything, the time will cure him.

She didn't say anything. She had been there when the doctor explained it to the worried family, her Internet Chaachi had taught her a lot about the term in the fifteen minutes that had passed after. Gauri knew there was a possibility he may never regain those moments he has lost and she was grateful for Shivay not voicing that part. 

"I know you're hurt Ri " he tried again, this time gentler than before.

"No, no Bade bhaiyya, she shook her head hastily. "Hum kush hai, that he woke up, he is alright and think of it he remembers nothing of those bad times, and the suffering he undertook.

For a moment Shivay watched her with a mixture of awe and pity, his bluish gray eyes slightly misting over. 

"Why are you so good Gauri? He asked after a pause. "You don't have to do it, think about others and smile all the time. Sometimes you should cry, complain, think about yourself too.

"But I don't have a right to do that Bade Bhaiyya, she said briskly, trying to keep her voice from breaking. "Sometimes tears fall only when there's someone to wipe them. Kher, she wiped her puffy eyes once more and switched the topic. "Were you looking for me? Is there something you need to get done?

"Ah yes, Shivay said sensing her need to let that topic go. "Now that Om doesn't remember anything, we need to work out a way of reintroducing you two. He tried to sound excited about it, but his smile dimmed as he noticed the crestfallen look in Ri's face. 

"You don't have to do it Bade Bhaiyya, she said softly. "You see, I'm going to leave...it will save the trouble and after all doctor ji did say we can't overlord him with details.

"Ri what are you...?

"Please Bade Bhaiyya...wo hum " 

But Shivay had had enough of her sacrificing.  He had grown to care for her a tad bit more than he cared for Priyanka in the three months they spent together, going through the hell their beloveds had created out of their lives, together. He knew his love will never get a second chance, and he did not know what went wrong between Ri and Om, but he was certain they still had a chance of patching up, starting all over, perhaps as Tia would have said, this was universe's way of giving them that chance. 

He stood up, not listening to Ri's further arguments, his decision already made. He would tell Om what he needed to know, only what he needed to know, nothing else. He paused at the door and looked at Ri again, she looked weak and pale, weeks worth of dark circles under her eyes.

"Go home, he said in a tender yet firm manner. "You need to rest, hum sab hai na yahaan?

There was a pause in which Gauri tried to read his face to know if he had listened to her or not, but Shivay had his SSO mask on and his face was as blank as the wall he was standing next to. She nodded, trying to give him a faint smile. He returned the gesture and shut the door after him, leaving her once more alone in that luxurious room.

Shivay texted Rudra on his way back to Omkara's room, asking him to drive Gauri home and to make sure she doesn't leave the house on her own accord. At the threshold of Omkara's room he dropped the worried creases of his face and pulled up a well practiced warm smile and clicked delete on the "Okay, done. Rudra had sent him.

This was their ALL FOR ONE towards Omkara.

**

Three weeks and two bossy brothers later...

His mornings had changed so drastically. Omkara thought to himself as he walked into the center hall of Oberoi mansion, checking the sunrise he had captured in his camera. It was so hard to convince Shivay to let him go out, when he was always bustling around him like a mother hen. After all his physiotherapist had cleared him, even the doctors were satisfied with his improvement, still that was not enough for Rudra to hand him the car keys he had hidden away somewhere, or Shivay to let loose the mob of guards hovering around him. Finally after a lot of blackmailing, complaining and cold shouldering his two brothers had relented, letting him have his usual morning walk at the sunrise. 

He was so engrossed in his photographs that he did not notice her, until he had walked right into her deep green clad figure. It seemed she had been lost in some world of her own, a soft startled yelp escaped her lips as she dropped the Thaali in her hands. A cloud of smoky red surrounded them as the Sindoor she had been carrying spilled on the ground. Both of them tried to stop it from falling, bumping their foreheads in the process. He held her from her shoulders to balance her before she slipped in the mess both of them had created.

The rosy cloud cleared slowly, giving him a vision of his wife. She might have been on her way to perform her morning prayers, droplets of water hung from the wet strands of her just washed hair, her cheeks were rosy warm, and her eyes slightly wide as she caught his gaze. Traces of Sindoor had tinted her hair and her elegant nose, for a moment his breath hitched in his throat. She was beautiful.

He had refused vehemently when Shivay told him of his marriage and the identity of the young woman he had been curious about before. Omkara didn't believe in marriages and rightly so after witnessing the strained relationship his parents shared. He couldn't believe he had married someone, so soon after breaking up with his almost half a decade relationship with Riddhima. It sounded so unlike him. But in the days that followed, he caught her tiptoeing around  him, always trying to keep herself away from his sight, always entering when she was sure he had fallen asleep. Omkara wondered why, was she avoiding him? He had noted the look of adoration that sometimes graced her face as she gazed at his sleeping form, he had of cause been pretending then. For some reason, it seemed she hero worshipped him and it made him uncomfortable.

He had asked about it from Shivay, after wasting fifteen minutes on worthless topics the day he returned home. Shivay grinned at his phrasing and said, "that's because you saved her life once.

He was more than surprised when he learned of the details of their marriage, of how she was chased by her own villages for a crime she had not committed, of how he had intervened and saved her by taking the seven Pheras. He could imagine her feelings towards him better then and his eyes lingered on her more often ever since.

Was she happy here? Was he right to change her fate like that? How would a girl feel when she was suddenly taken from her small town world under violent circumstances and thrown into the sophisticated pit of vipers that was his world? He wished Annika was here, so he could have asked her. But for some reason she was no longer a part of their lives. He had caught Gauri laughing with Rudra once over some silly narration about his day at college. The moment their eyes met her laughter died out, she dropped her eyes and fled the room immediately. Was she frightened of him? Rudra had given him a dark look as soon as she left...what exactly had he done?

There was no one who could explain the mystery that was his wife. So instead, Omkara had taken to observe her silently as she roamed the halls of the Oberoi mansion and his dreams in the night. His Mom loved her, the two of them spend hours together talking about everything under the sun, the smile in his mom's face was something he had always craved to see. She was clearly afraid of Mr. Oberoi, he had seen her practically tremble at the simple task of handing that man a cup of tea. Perhaps it wasn't fear, it was disgust just like his feelings towards the man. He wished he could ask her. She was Shivay's partner in crime, it came as a surprise. Shivay had reverted back to his old SSO ways, but he had walked into them sat in the low table at the kitchen one night, speaking in hushed voice and sharing a late night cup of hot chocolate; from the fragment of conversation he could catch Omkara realized they were talking about Annika and something about a secret they should not let someone else find out again. Omkara had an uneasy feeling that that someone had been him, from the too bright and casual welcome Shivay had given him.

She had become a part of everyone's life, he thought a little enviously and he had missed a lot of what happened in his own family. But now, looking at her flushed face fresh in the dawn, he could understand why it had been so easy for her to make her place in his home. She was like sunshine, he thought unconsciously, and sunshine only needed a tiny gap to seep in and brighten the shadows.

Omkara had not decided what he needed from their relationship yet, in fact he wasn't sure if he ever did. But there was something he was certain about, he did want her in his life her presence had become a habit he could not overcome.

"Good morning, " he told her, releasing her gently from his hold. She dusted her long sheet of hair to get the sindoor off the dark locks and droplets of water sprinkled on his cheeks, Omkara blinked as she looked up at him a little surprised. "Aise kya dekh rahi ho?

"Wo - wo " She stammered, fidgeting with the corner of her pallu. "I'm not used to see you up so early.

"Why? He was surprised now. "I always get up before the others.

"Oh -" her voice trailed off. "I didn't know that. Let me bring you some tea, she offered and  had already turned to leave when Omkara realized he might not get this chance again. She would leave now and stay clear of his way for the rest of the day. With a quick reflex he caught her wrist, holding her back.

"Gauri, " he could almost feel the way her pulse raced and something stirred inside him. He had never had such an effect on anyone. She turned around curiously, her eyes a little fearful. 

"Ji?

"Are you happy? The words escaped his lips before he had thought them over. This was the first proper conversation they were having, at least the first that he remembered, and he had asked her something so complicated. Before he could rephrase his question she exhaled slowly. 

"Aap aise kiyun...?

"Wo -" he was stammering now. "Shivay told me about our marriage and I was wondering since everything happened so suddenly, we might not have had a chance to even get to know each other and now we're married...toh I was wondering, are you happy here Gauri? I mean I know you're really getting along with everyone and all...I'm very thankful for that, but I was wondering if there was anything you wanted...if this was what you wanted from life or something you wanted to do with your life...if there is, you will tell me, right?

She looked dazed, he thought watching her expression. Her mouth opened and closed a few times before she found her voice finally. For a moment he was horrified she was going to ask for a divorce, he wasn't ready to let her go yet, but instead as if acting on a sudden impulse she reached in and caressed his jaw. His eyelashes flattered at her touch and he exhaled slowly, unconsciously relaxing against her touch.

"Wo...wo, she stammered again when he gave her an startled look. "There was some Sindoor on your face. He nodded and smiled at her 

"Hum bohut kush hai, Omkara ji". She told him softly. "Shankar ji returned you to us, what else can I ask for?" There was a pause in which she watched him hungrily, as if wanting to say something but deciding not to. He wished she let go of those inhabitations and speak of her mind, he yearned to know what was going on behind that smiling mask of a face. 

"What are you looking at? "He asked her finally, feeling a little conscious with her starting.

"Kuch nahi," she shook her head gently. "I like seeing you happy and I've never seen you so happy. "Her answer was almost a whisper, tinted with awe. There was that look of adoration in her eyes once more. Instead of dropping his gaze or feeling uncomfortable as he always did, Omkara stepped closer and traced his index finger down the bridge of her nose. If possible her eyes widened a little more, and her cheeks turned redder. God, he loved her innocence. Omkara smiled to himself.

"You too had some Sindoor on your nose," he said stepping away and tapping his own to show her. She swayed a little, still under the effect of the trance his touch had created and nodded slowly. "See you around Gauri, ah yes, don't forget that tea. "He walked away running a lazy hand through his thick mane of hair. She watched him walk away, a spring to his step and looking younger and lighter than she had ever seen him and clutched a hand to calm her rapidly beating heart. 

What exactly had came over her husband? 

**

Open to your views, the good and the bad. Please share your thoughts with me and help me improve.

Hope you enjoyed if not, I'm sorry about that. 

Thanks for reading!

Love,

Sakura