(No Control | Holding Me Ransom - 65 - All Our Friends, You and Me) 

We have an hour or so to kill before our flight is due to leave, so I take the opportunity to give Jeff a call and catch up. He answers after only a couple of rings, and sounds excited.

"Hey man, I was gonna call you today."

"Ah, well I've saved you the trouble," I smile. "How are things? You good?"

"Yeah great, really great. How about you, are you enjoying your time off with Jess?"

"We've just said goodbye," I tell him. "Her flight's just left and I'm waiting to board mine to Mexico."

"You missing her already?" he teases, and I can't help smiling.

"Yeah, I am," I admit. "Go ahead, tell me I'm a loser."

"You're a loser," Louis supplies immediately from across the room, without even looking up from his phone. I stick my finger up at him pointlessly.

"Nah, you're not a loser, you're just loved up," Jeff responds, and I can hear the grin in his voice. "I'm happy for you, man. You deserve it after everything that's happened this year."

"Thanks," I mutter.

"So, I was going to call you later and see if you wanna catch up soon with me and my dad," Jeff continues. "Obviously you know we wanna talk about your future management once your Modest contract ends. We were thinking of maybe taking some time out to relax, somewhere warm, where we can chill out, throw some ideas around, discuss details... what do you think?"

"I think that sounds great," I beam. "You know my schedule is pretty full right up until Christmas though..."

"Yeah I know, that's what I told Dad. So he suggested a New Year break on the yacht in the Caribbean. He has some free time anyway and thought a holiday would do you good. And it would give us time to talk at leisure about everything. Bring the family - your mum, Robin, Gemma... Jess too. So what do you say? Are you in?"

"Of course I'm in," I breathe. "Wow, thank you. I can't wait."

"Awesome, me neither. I was thinking about inviting Kendall and Jordan, too. And of course Kris, and anyone else from that clan that wants to come."

Jordan is Kendall's new boyfriend, although they're under the radar at the moment, and Kris is Kris Jenner - Kendall's mum and manager. Kris is good friends with Shelli, Jeff's mum and Irving's wife. I don't like to speak badly of people, but I'm not a huge fan of Kris, simply because she lives her life for every scrap of attention she can get from the media. I prefer to keep as much of my life private as possible.

"The more the merrier," I say out loud. 

"Great. What dates are you free?" he asks.

"I have no plans over Christmas or New Year," I tell him. "I don't think Mum has anything planned either, but I'll speak to her and ask her to ring Shelli."

"Already in hand," Jeff replies. "My mom's calling your mom later today."

"Perfect," I grin. "I'll speak to Jess when she's home. Just work the dates out between you and let me know."

"What's the crack, H?" Louis asks as I say goodbye to Jeff. He still hasn't looked up from his phone.

"Just planning to catch up with Jeff and Irving over New Year," I tell him, and Louis and Liam look up with interest. "I'm hoping they're going to represent me once we're out of contract with Modest."

Niall gives a low whistle, while Liam beams. "That's really great, I'm really chuffed for you mate," Liam says enthusiastically. "You're going to smash this break, it's obvious."

"I don't know about that," I murmur. "It's still nerve-wracking, thinking about doing stuff alone, isn't it?" They all nod and murmur in agreement. 

"It's gonna be weird not having the next year of our lives planned out on the calendar," Louis observes. "It's gonna be weird just being, like, jobless."

"Unemployed," Niall chuckles.

"On the dole," Liam adds, and we all laugh at this.

"Personally, I can't wait to have a few lie-ins," Niall declares. "I'm sure I'll be bored after about five minutes, but right now I can't wait to just sleep, drink tea, watch Netflix and play Fifa."

"To be fair, you are shit at Fifa. You could use the practice," Louis quips, and Niall flicks his leg.

"I thrashed you last time we played, Tommo," Niall reminds him and Louis rolls his eyes. 

I take the opportunity on the flight to Mexico to follow up my idea for Jess's Christmas present - a car. I can't ever remember having discussed cars with her, so I have no idea of there is a specific make or model she likes. Obviously I want to get her something good; something luxurious. I know she's always been impressed by the gadgets in both my Range Rover and my Audi, but this is more to do with the gadgets themselves rather than the specific car models. I browse the various car websites, examining the different models available, and after an hour or so my head feels like it's going to explode. There are so many specifications to consider, and so many optional extras to be added on and customised. I don't want her to think I'm trying to be flash, or trying to show off to win her approval.  But on the other hand, I can afford it and why shouldn't I splash out on her and get her all the luxuries available? I happen to think she deserves to be spoiled. 

Eventually I decide on a BMW, and find a dealer fairly local to my Mum's house. After browsing their online catalogue for the best part of two hours I've finally confirmed all the extras, and once I've paid the deposit using my bank card I am delighted when I receive a confirmation email telling me the specifications I've requested are available and the car has been held for me, waiting for me to select a delivery date. 

I browse car accessories online for a further half an hour, tempted by various novelty items, and am just about to buy a set of fluffy pink dice (as a joke) when I see a One Direction air freshener instead. Unfortunately there isn't a 'I heart Harry Styles' one, so I confirm the purchase of the 1D one and smirk to myself at a job well done.

Once we arrive at the hotel we gather in Niall's room and hang out for a few hours playing Fifa (Louis was right, Niall is shit), eating pizza and having a few beers. It's nice to chill out as a foursome like this, and there is an undertone of nostalgia coupled with appreciation; now we know our time left as a band is limited, it's like we want to make the most of it. We don't know when we'll next all be together again once the hiatus starts. It's late when we call it a night, and I wake up late the next morning to a missed call and a voicemail from Jess, who sounds sleepy and adorable. My heart sinks a little as I think of all the time that needs to pass before I can see her again. 

I don't have time to call her back until I'm showered, dressed and sitting in a meeting room in a tall, air conditioned office block, a few streets away from our hotel with Niall, waiting for Liam and Louis to arrive, wishing I'd gone to bed earlier the night before as I'm way too tired and I'm supposed to be challenging Niall in the gym later. Something tells me he's going to kick my arse. 

I nurse a black coffee as I dial her number, but even as it's ringing I realise I don't have a clue what time it is in London and for all I know it could be the middle of the night. Her phone goes to voicemail so I leave her a message.

"Hi baby, I just woke up and got your message, you sound so cute when you're tired." (Niall sticks his fingers down his throat in a gagging motion. I ignore him.) "I was hoping to catch you but I guess you're still asleep, so maybe give me a ring when you wake up and hopefully I'll be able to answer. We're in meetings this morning, and then I'm heading to the gym for a workout with Niall this afternoon-"

"Hey Jess!" Niall calls, interrupting my monologue.

"That's Niall, he says hi, but you probably already know that because you'll have recognised his voice," I mutter, my mind scrambling for something interesting to say. As you can tell, it's failing. "Um... OK, I hate talking to voicemails because I'm really conscious I talk slowly and I think it's going to cut me off before I've finished, so I'm going to go now because I'm just rambling and this is turning into a really boring message." OK, shut up now and just end the call. "OK, um, I love you, and... I'll talk to you later. Call me. Or I'll call you. Whatever. I love you. Bye."

"Smooth," Niall remarks. 

Thank God Louis isn't here, because I would have been crucified for that.

He arrives a few minutes later with Liam and various members of our management, and we discuss our schedule in Mexico and LA for the upcoming two weeks which includes filming for our next single, Infinity, a performance at the Telehit Awards where we'll be performing A.M. live for the very first time, two Jingle Ball performances, San José and finally Carpool Karaoke with James Corden. It's going to be a manic two weeks.

By the time we have been through everything it's lunchtime and we are ushered back to the cars to head back to the hotel for some lunch, before we have a free afternoon. Niall is next to me, Louis and Liam are in the car behind, and I check my phone to see a missed call from Jess. I quickly google the time in London - it's half past seven in the evening, so hopefully she'll be able to talk. 

"Hi," she answers almost immediately, and I can hear the sound of a familiar theme tune in the background that makes me feel strangely homesick.

"Hi baby," I greet her. "Is that Eastenders I can hear on the TV?"

"Yeah, it's just started," she replies. "How's your day?"

"It's good," I nod. "Meetings are done, so I'm heading back to the hotel now, I'm gonna kick Niall's arse in the gym." Niall sniggers at this, and realistically I know there's no way I'll be doing any arse-kicking whatsoever. I'm more likely to fall asleep on the weights bench. "Then we've got a press conference tomorrow, the Telehit Awards the day after that, and then I'm heading back to LA," I reel off.

"Sounds exciting!"

"It is, but right this second I'd rather be cuddled up with you watching Eastenders, if I'm honest," I admit. "I'm exhausted."

"Not long left now," she soothes. "You'll soon be home, and then we can cuddle up as much as you want."

My stomach flips over and I feel all warm and gooey inside.

"I can't wait," I tell her. "I'm really missing you."

"I'm missing you too," she replies softly. "I'm freezing. I need you to come and keep me warm."

"I can think of plenty of ways to do that," I smirk, lowering my voice and turning my face away from Niall so he doesn't hear me.

"I'm counting on it," Jess responds, in the same tone.

"Keep it clean, I'm not interested in listening to other people have phone sex!" Niall moans, clearly not fooled by my attempt to keep my conversation private. Then with a gleam of mischief in his eyes he raises his voice and adds, "Harry, for God's sake put your dick away, man, I don't wanna see that!" 

Jess gasps on the other end of the phone as I splutter and squawk in protest at Niall. "What the f- don't say things like that!" I scold him, and then into the phone I add hastily, "I'm literally in the back seat of a car next to him, and I promise you I am not doing anything perverse! I'm fully dressed! Jeez..."

I swat my hand at Niall who deflects it, laughing silently at my fluster. 

"I should hope not," Jess chuckles. 

"People don't realise Niall's the dirtiest one out of all of us," I tell her, looking pointedly at Niall and mouthing 'Selena Gomez'. "He has this church boy reputation, but behind closed doors he's pure filth."

Niall lets out his signature cackle and thrust his hips up and down on the seat next to me. I shake my head at him, grinning.

"Will you be awake for a bit?" I ask Jess, changing the subject away from everyone's sex lives. "I want to talk to you about something when we can get a minute to ourselves."

Niall leans towards me and says loudly in the direction of my phone, "Phone sex." 

I put my entire hand over his irritating face and push him away. "Niall, fucķ off! Sorry, baby," I mutter, but she laughs it off.

"Yeah, probably," she says, in answer to my previous question. "I'm tired but I'll do my best to stay awake. What did you want to talk about?"

"You'll have to wait and see," I tease, and I glance out of the window as we turn into the hotel entrance. "I'll tell you later. I've got to go, we're arriving at the hotel now. I'll ring you once I've battered this knobhead in the gym."

"You wish, boyo," Niall laughs.

"Have fun," she yawns. "Love you."

"Love you too," I tell her.

We enjoy a buffet lunch courtesy of the hotel in one of their premium meeting rooms, and then I head up to my room to get changed before making my way down to the gym to meet Niall. Both of us are competitive, but I'm so tired today that he runs rings around me every step of the way.

"Come on Harry, at least put some effort in," he calls as he lifts his weights with apparent ease and I struggle with my usual warm up.

"Fuck off, knobhead," I call back. 

I call it a day after an hour, leaving Niall to finish his session, and haul my sorry backside up to my room and collapse on the bed. I prop the phone on the pillow next to me, put it on speaker and call Jess, but it rings through to her voicemail and I can only assume she's already fallen asleep. 

I send her a quick text to say I'll speak to her tomorrow, and am just about to get in the shower when Jeff calls.

"Just a quick one to confirm dates for New Year," he says. "We can have the yacht in Saint Bart's from 27th December to 3rd January - Sunday to Sunday. Your mom and Robin have confirmed, Kendall's in, Kris has said yes so we're just waiting for you now. Have you spoken to Jess?"

"No, I haven't had chance to bring it up yet," I answer. "But I'm sure it'll be fine. Count us in. I'll just surprise her with it, I think she'll be over the moon. Thanks, man."

"No problem. Oh by the way, Gemma said to tell you you're a loser, and you never call her back."

"Shit, yeah, she has tried to ring me a few times," I mutter. "I'll ring her now."

"Cool. Laters, dude."

We ring off and I immediately ring Gemma, who doesn't answer, so I leave her a voicemail.

"Why do you never answer your phone?" I whine theatrically after the beep. "You're impossible to get hold of, and I never even know where in the world you are! Call me back, loser."

I know these are all the things she always says about me, so it will infuriate her that I've said them to her, ha! I ring Mum instead, and we have a good catch up about the last few days, the next few days, and how excited we are about New Year. She informs me that Gemma isn't coming on the yacht as she wants to spend some time with her boyfriend, Michal, as they aren't spending Christmas together. "Speaking of Christmas," she continues, "have you and Jess made any arrangements?"

"I haven't had chance to speak to her yet," I reply. "But I was kind of hoping she might want to come and spend Christmas with us, especially as we'll probably have to fly out on Boxing Day. Would that be OK with you, if I invited her?"

"Sweetheart, of course it would!" she exclaims, and I can hear the excitement in her voice. "Jess is always welcome here, you know that."

"Cool, thanks Mum."

"I do think you need to get your skates on though, Harry," she adds. "Jess might have made plans of her own. Don't just assume she's free."

"I won't," I reply quickly. "She hasn't mentioned anything though, so I'm sure it's fine."

"Just don't take her for granted," Mum warns, and I brush away her concerns. 

"Anyway I'm gonna have to go," I tell her a few minutes later. "I still need a shower, and then I think I'll order room service and have an early night."

"I can't wait to get some homecooked meals in you," she sighs.

"I can't wait either. Love you Mum. Speak to you soon."

---

I wake the following morning to a text back from Jess:

Sorry Squidge :( I miss you. Call me when you can. I love you too xxx

I know she'll be at work now so I send a quick one back:

Just woken up and seen this! We keep missing each other! I'll ring you later once we've finished our press conference xxx

I feel better after a decent night's sleep and once we're on our way to the conference I send her another text, even though she hasn't even seen my first.

Thinking about you, and wishing I was there with you or you were here with me. Can't wait to hear your voice later. I love you so much baby xxxx

She texts me back just as we're getting miked up and I can't help grinning as I read it.

I'm smiling like a buffoon. I love you too. You make me feel all squiggly inside xxx

"Phone sex?" Niall queries, appearing at my side as I hastily lock my phone screen.

"Fuck off!" I hiss, still grinning. "You're getting as bad as Louis!"

The questions from the media are pretty much standard, and nothing we haven't been asked before. We give the same standard answers, deliberately being vague about the length of the hiatus and promising we'll be back one day, etc. We get back to the hotel mid-afternoon which is early evening in London. Crossing my fingers that she'll answer and be able to talk, and squirming with excitement about my news, I call Jess.

"Hi Squidge!" she answers happily.

"Hey baby," I practically sing. "Are you free to talk? Are you at home?"

"Yes, and yes," she replies. "I'm so sorry I fell asleep last night. I just couldn't keep my eyes open. I think the jet lag was catching up with me."

"No worries. I'm glad I'm finally got you now. Good day at work?"

"Busy," she sighs. "The usual catching-up-after-a-week-off type of thing. But it was nice to see everyone again. How about you? How was your press conference?"

"Same old same old. Usual interview stuff. Nothing exciting to report, except that Niall won't stop hassling me about phone sex."

"Niall wants to have phone sex?" she asks curiously.

"What - no, he's just teasing me about me and you having phone sex, which I never confirmed or denied... anyway, forget about that. So...," I take a deep breath, almost squealing with excitement. "I was just wondering if you'd given any more thought to us going on holiday together?"

"Well, it's funny you should mention that," she says excitedly. "Because actually yes I have."

"Oh really?" I muse. "Well that's fortunate."

"How so?" 

"Because, being the amazing and handsome boyfriend I am, I have access to an exclusive, luxury yacht in the Caribbean," I announce. "And I was wondering if maybe you would like to accompany me as my guest, along with a few of my very close friends, for a nice relaxing week in the sun?"

There is a second of silence, then: "Oh my God, are you serious? That sounds absolutely incredible! I would love to come! When were you thinking of going?"

Yesssss! More boyfriend points! Callie is so going to eat her words about me and I can't wait.

"I hoped you'd say that," I beam. "Because... it's already booked; I got a bit carried away. I thought we both deserved it. So, we fly out on Boxing Day, for a week, and return on the third of January!"